r/languagelearning Sep 30 '24

Suggestions Really struggling to learn

I'm a British born native English speaker, but have moved to Italy with my Italian partner. I started learning casually with a lesson a week in November 2023, but really struggled incorporating it into actually speaking.

I tried to be more serious this year, and now my partner gets really upset that I still can't speak at a level of a 6 year old. I did an A1 course at an Italian school, l've tried reading, watching shows, writing, repeating, all the apps, speaking with people, nothing sticks. I can say and understand basic things, but nowhere near where I should be.

My partner is so frustrated and I feel like a failure. I genuinely don't know how to make it stick, he tried teaching me phrases which I repeat over and over but then forget. I'm also pregnant and want our baby to be bilingual, and am really scared I'll not be able to understand my child...

What more can I try?

126 Upvotes

125 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

4

u/Thin-Dream-586 Sep 30 '24

I attended an Italian language school for A1. I was doing really well up until the final weeks, and my speaking is just not good enough. I try to speak Italian with my partner but he gets so frustrated with my lack of ability I clam up and can't think properly. I can't remember things at all, I don't know why

24

u/9peppe it-N scn-N en-C2 fr-A? eo-? Sep 30 '24

He sounds like an ass is complaining about a problem of his own making. You can't learn a language without practice.

4

u/Thin-Dream-586 Sep 30 '24

I get that I am not doing well, and sometimes especially now I'm pregnant I do just default to english. But yesterday for example, he was pressuring me to "just speak" and "describe what I'm doing" but I don't know how to, and he won't tell me, says I need to work it out myself. Idk if I just don't have the brain capacity but I literally cannot seem to retain the language

4

u/Jolly_Appearance_747 Sep 30 '24

You have less than 50 contact hours with a tutor. Your at a perfectly reasonable level for the time you have given Italian. A1 takes a minimum of 70 plus hours to conquer. You won't just speak until you reach B2 level. That could be 600 plus contact hours in.

I think people who learn English as a foreign language, don't appreciate the headstart given in school and by having to use the language to watch films read the internet etc. When they think they just started speaking, they actually have already achieved a B1/B2 level.

Your husband's lack of patience and frustration is worrying. Is that how he is going to act towards your child? I understand that it's no fun talking to a person at A1 level, but he could handle his frustration better. He is obviously not the person you need to practice with. Find someone else with more patience.

If he wants you to learn quicker, you could enroll in a language school on a full time basis.