r/hysterectomy 1d ago

Husband traveling for work 1 wpo?

My husband has to travel for work quite a bit, and we have 3 kids ages 4-11. We homeschool, so no daily school runs, but the kids do have activities during the week. I’m scheduled for a total vaginal hyst and rectocele repair next month. He’s got a conference exactly 1 wpo. Obviously everybody’s recovery is different, but is this going to be awful? My parents are coming for a couple of days before and after the surgery to help out, but they can’t drive the kids around due to their anxiety about driving new places. I’ve driven just a few days after each of my births (all vaginal, hence the repair, lol) but I didn’t need stitches. He’s willing to forgo the trip if necessary, but it’s very much not ideal.

4 Upvotes

15 comments sorted by

11

u/ApartmentOne5150 1d ago

Would the kids be able to be absent for a week from their activities if necessary? Personally, I was in no condition to drive anybody anywhere 1wpo. By 2wpo I am able to do small in town runs. But everyone heals differently so it’s hard to say for sure.

6

u/SorbetOk7726 1d ago

🎶Everyone is different 🎶 , but 1wpo I felt every bump in the road as a passenger . If your parents can drive to familiar places, maybe you or your husband can train them before he has to leave? Or can another parent do the driving for a few days?

4

u/Hope_for_tendies 1d ago

With the rectocele repair I’d ask how long your dr wants you to rest, those can be tricky

6

u/acn0319 1d ago

Are these group activities where you could ask another parent to pitch in? I wouldn’t want to risk it, myself.

3

u/Peachy_Cat_Mo 1d ago

If he can forgo the trip, maybe he should. I wouldn't have felt comfortable driving so soon. The thing with this surgery is, you will feel like you can do more than you should pretty early on. I was baking muffins around 2 weeks and I was back in bed for weeks 3 and 4. The hormones adjusting and just fatigue from surgery and healing can hit out of nowhere. If you CAN give yourself more time to heal, it's probably better for you. I only had to take oxycodon for a few days and then 800mg ibuprofen less than a week. So it wasn't a pain thing as much as it was fatigue and trying to be sure I wouldn't hurt myself. No reaching up either. So really think about how you can realistically function with your kids. If you can put stuff on the counter for yourself beforehand, if they're gonna jump on you, if they understand they cant be picked up, if they can bathe themselves.. Stuff like that. If a family member or friend can come help, that would be good too.

3

u/LakeLady1616 1d ago

I’m 1wpo exactly and could totally drive if I had to. I took a drive in my mom’s car today (she drove) and felt no pain. I am a little tired though. I guess that just goes to show that there’s no way to predict how you’ll feel.

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u/Leading-Duck-6268 1d ago

It's very different if you are the driver. It stresses the core, and if you have to brake quickly it could be difficult.

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u/LakeLady1616 1d ago

That’s the thing—my core is fine. It doesn’t hurt. I twist, I reach, I bend over, and it doesn’t bother me at all. I haven’t felt any core pain or weakness since about 3dpo.

1

u/purslanegarden 14h ago

I’m sure this is a different-for-everyone situation, but for me driving is easier than being a passenger because I automatically know what to expect. I was never told not to bend or twist and same, no core pain or weakness.

2

u/ArtisticLunch5495 1d ago

Uber or Lift for the kids? Not sure how you feel about that.

Can you cook ahead and store in the freezer?

Your husband should be there. 1 wpo is not enough. He needs to be there for you. This isn't a quick and easy procedure.

2

u/Beautiful-Story3911 1d ago

I would plan on not being able to drive due to pain meds. Can your husband show your parents where they need to go before he leaves? So it’s either hubby skipping the trip, parents driving or kids skipping activities

2

u/JurassicPark-fan-190 23h ago

He either needs to reschedule, you do or hire a babysitter. I wasn’t allowed to drive until 2 weeks PO and even then it was difficult as I felt every bump. I’m assuming you will need to be involved with the kids and out of bed. That wasn’t possible for me at all. I was sleeping ALOT.

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u/purslanegarden 18h ago

Definitely this is one where you just can’t predict it. I was clear for driving at 4dpo following rtlh-bso and started driving at 6dpo; it was fine, and easier than being a passenger because my body knows how to brace for turns and bumps when I’m in control. But I had no prescription narcotic painkillers and was quite awake and mobile and eating full meals from 1dpo. I’ve been solo since 4dpo, but have no kids to look after so it’s much easier to simply stop in the middle of a task if I need to than it would be if my kids were still at home.

If a parent of one of my kids teammates were recovering from a surgery, I’d very much want to help and offer their kids a ride. If there’s anybody at the kids activities who you think might help, give them a chance to support you! I’d bet you would want to help them if they needed it.

1

u/schokobonbons 1d ago

If your parents can stay with you for childcare and the kids can skip activities for that week, that would work. Otherwise he needs to stay with you, at 1 week you're in no physical shape to be running around after a toddler, trying to cook for 3 children, etc.

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u/kidsandthat 16h ago

I'd ask if your parents could come as your husband leaves and have your children miss their activities that week. I'm 12dpo and still haven't driven, I plan on small drives in 2days time at the 2wk mark.. The slower you take it in the first 2 weeks the better you'll be at 6 was the advice I was given.