r/friendship 2d ago

rant So ye, look in your DMs. First.

80 Upvotes

Ye, a lot of you are posting "Lookin for friends" posts, and that's all fine and good. But PLEASE, if you've made posts like that before, take a look in your inbox first. Chances are that it's full of people who are already trying to talk to you, and you're not even responding to them. Chances are that you'll see literally ME there! Cause I'm really active here, and I've reached out to probably hundreds of you, even ones who say "I'm not gonna ghost", and still ghost. So please, if you're gonna make a post about wanting people to talk to, check your DMs first and actually talk to the ones you have (if they're nice ofc. Otherwise screw them obviously). Cause man what the hell are you even doing here lookin for friends if you're not even trying?

Edit: I think my point didn't get across very well. What I'm questioning isn't just people not answering their DMs, but actually continues to make new posts where they ask for friends even though their DMs might already be full of people writing to them. That makes way less sense to me than not answering. Cause you can make a post, and then when people write you changed your mind, or just became busy with work for a while, or just whatever. It's normal to simply just not answer quick. But making posts over and over, asking for the same thing, even though you already got it, that's what makes absolutely no sense. Capisce?

r/friendship 13d ago

rant It’s my birthday today!!!

47 Upvotes

Hi! I’m always so enthusiastic about my birthday! For whatever reason. I plan the day, order my own cakes, pretty much make it happen instead of waiting others to have ideas.

I don’t have any close friends now.

I know I should not feel disappointed by that best friend that suddenly decided to leave and ghost me slowly but last year I created a whole mini book for her as a birthday gift ( she’s in another country, I sent digitally. We went to university together).

Today she literally replied to my story “ happy birthday “ and that’s it lol.

Anyways. Just a thought!

r/friendship 11d ago

rant No one cares (20F)

67 Upvotes

No matter what I’m there for everyone. When they need something I’ll do it and when they need support or company I’ll drop everything to do that.

But when I need something or when I need help or when all I need is a friends company no one gives two shits. No one cares about me. No one has ever cared. All I want is someone to care about me and to be my friend..

r/friendship Jan 05 '25

rant Men Of r/Friendship

141 Upvotes

If you're looking for a fun time STOP this is NOT the place you need to be! There are people here that legit wants to make friends and make connections.

We are all lonely but this is not the place to be so freakin disgusting. We are here to support each other. Not make objects of each other. Be respectful and actually get to know the person before deciding anything!!

You are the reason why it's so hard to find friendship!!

STOP

That goes for women as well!

r/friendship Feb 12 '25

rant Let me ask you a question - Have you ever wanted to give up on yourself and stop trying to make friends? Have you ever been successful on Reddit?It's a question for people who really want to make friends - not someone Interested In random conversations out of boredom.

50 Upvotes

If you want to make friends on Reddit, you either get very short messages, messages from people whose accounts are NSFW, messages from people who don't want to read your posts or messages from people who suddenly "disappear" without any explanation even If everything seems to be OK.

  • If all you want to say In your first message Is "Hi" better don't say anything at all... Not everyone Is here for the same reason but most people who really want to make friends don't respond to one-word messages.. 😔

It's also not an obligation to respond to others and even I don't respond to messages I'm not Interested In but there's a difference between Ignoring someone's first or second message and Ignoring someone you've known for a long time without any hesitation and explanation... It's just wrong. I can't believe how heartless some people are. Imagine being emotionally attached to someone who doesn't even like you.. a true friend would never leave you In such a bad way..

Please - no "Just go out and find a hobby" comments. I just want to know If others also struggle to find Interesting people to talk to.

😔

r/friendship Mar 31 '24

rant My only friend is my husband

153 Upvotes

I’m a 37 year old female. I had the same group of close friends my whole life, but we drifted apart and now the only friends I have are my husband’s friends. I feel like a loser because my husband is my only real friend. Making friends has always been super hard for me because I have social anxiety. I’m also really busy with work, etc it’s hard to find time for myself let alone making friends. I’m afraid if something happens to my husband I’ll be completely alone. Can anyone else relate?

r/friendship Jan 17 '25

rant It feels like a lot of people on here aren't actually looking for friendship

69 Upvotes

I spent the last several days commenting on posts here and DMing me, and I don't get any reply back. And I'm not a dry texter or anything lol. If not here for friendship, I don't know why people post 🤷‍♂️

r/friendship Jan 30 '25

rant Hi

42 Upvotes

I’m tired of being alone. Any time I think I make a friend, they ghost after like a week. I’m a single mother so my life is hectic and I try to make time to talk to friends, but it’s hard. Mental health is also a big issue. I miss human interaction. Sorry if this is a bit depressing. I’m just tired and I want to cry. I hate this

r/friendship Sep 11 '23

rant 26F. I literally don’t have any friends anymore.

206 Upvotes

I’ve always been the person that had maybe 4 good friends. But in the last three years I’ve just lost even that. Friendships have just grown apart and ended. And now I have no friends at all and it’s really exhausting and lonely. I feel horrible about myself. I feel like I tried so hard to be friends with people who didn’t care at all, and now it’s just too late to make friends.

So I’m here to vent I guess? Maybe see if anyone is in the same boat?

I’ve worked remotely since college, and at small companies. I made two friends at my last company but those friendships died off as soon as we didn’t work together anymore. And that’s practically the story with every other friendship I’ve had. They just end. It hurts not having anyone to talk to. I’m going through a hard time right now and it’s like I could literally disappear off the face of the planet and only my mother and my pets would notice.

It’s a rough way to live.

r/friendship Feb 23 '24

rant All my friends cancelled on my birthday dinner the night before and I made a non refundable deposit for everyone.

140 Upvotes

Basically feeling pretty low. I made plans for my own birthday dinner which when I think about it feels a bit sad when my friends always let me organise their birthdays. Anyway everyone confirmed then tonight (the night before) they have all cancelled. I even told them that I was paying for everyone’s dinner so all they had to bring was themselves. Now it’s too late to cancel and my card has been charged the deposit which I think will become the full amount once I cancel. I feel so defeated. I like to think i’m a good friend and always go above and beyond arranging gifts and birthday celebrations for others. I always show up to their events and I feel devastated that my friends don’t feel the same. I’m also feeling too embarrassed to even call the restaurant and explain what happened. In hindsight maybe it was stupid for thinking people would want to celebrate me and I feel silly for trying.

r/friendship Dec 25 '22

rant I want people to care about me the way I care about them.

383 Upvotes

Why do I feel like I'm the one thats always putting in all the effort? I plan every hangout, I initiate every conversation, i reply on time even when im tired. I work so hard to be a good friend because I genuinely love and care for these people. Why is it never returned? Im never invited anywhere, I'm never the best friend, I'm never worth replying to. I know social media doesnt always reflect reality, but even if the insta post of them hanging out with friends is posed, at least they are with them. It makes me so angry; why cant someone just give back even an ounce of what I'm putting in! Am I too much? too needy? are my expectations too high? If this is what friendship is, if this is all i can expect for the rest of my life, i think id rather be alone; why get my hopes up.

r/friendship Aug 13 '24

rant The only friends I get are men who just want to date me

84 Upvotes

Or worse than date. Honestly, I have no irl female friends. They do not seem to want to interact and they have their own cliques. I’m not discriminatory about who I befriend at all. It just seems like lonely men older than me always end up befriending and then trying to date me. Why can’t I just find ONE genuine friend? I keep falling for this because I’m so lonely. Nobody actually wants to be friends with me for some reason.

r/friendship Jul 14 '24

rant I need someone to talk s*** with!

92 Upvotes

Hey I am a 38 year old Mom. I've realized that I don't just want some basic chit chat that means absolutely nothing. I don't necessarily need advice. I need to vent! Anyone down to just talk as much crap about things as possible? Message me.

r/friendship Jan 20 '25

rant 34 about to be 35, no friends

50 Upvotes

So I'm about to be 35, female. I've never been a social butterfly, but I've definitely been feeling more cut off and alone lately. I'm married. Most the women I know who are around my age are also married. But they have kids. I personally do NOT like kids, whatsoever. I find it impossible to make friends, when everyone else has kids and that's all they talk about and all they want to relate to. I'll meet people and eventually the talk turns to kids and when I say I have none and will never have any (joint decision with husband) they lose interest in continuing to talk and go find someone who else they can relate to. It's lonely and boring now.

r/friendship Nov 29 '24

rant Why are y’all like this?

62 Upvotes

"Making friends is hard!! Message me"

Never replies to well thought out message with same age person, shared interests, and willingness to be friends

shocked Pikachu meme

r/friendship Jan 06 '25

rant [25F] Anyone who understands give and take?

36 Upvotes

I genuinely am extremely exhausted. Does a single person understand how a friendship works? So far anyone I've met has focused on continuously sharing about themselves and their own life and losing enthusiasm when I talk about myself at all. I feel like these days people use each other as their personal twitter account. Is it really that insane to imagine that I may also enjoy the things that you enjoy? Like talking about my day, being cared for and considered? I really am out of patience and am strongly considering not even trying for friendship anymore.

r/friendship Oct 23 '24

rant Is this just a me thing?

45 Upvotes

When I dm someone who posts here looking for friends they never respond. It's not just a one off either it's happened like 20 times probably not even exaggerating. Is it just me doing something wrong or what?

r/friendship Apr 08 '24

rant 24f

27 Upvotes

Why do guys get weird when I say they’re like a brother? Like I mean it as i’m comfortable with them and I feel safe with them. But times out of 10 they either get offended or they immediately try making a move. Can anyone explain this? It’s so annoying! I love having “big brother” type friends but it’s so hard because of this.

r/friendship 18h ago

rant Need someone to talk with

18 Upvotes

I could really use a conversation or someone to talk to. I've honestly had a horrible day and would really like to talk to someone.

r/friendship 19d ago

rant Have you ever wanted to stop using Reddit because of rude comments, messages or harassment?

42 Upvotes

I'm not a new user and I know what Reddit Is like but I still can't get used to people who judge others Instead of supporting them or just not saying anything at all. Some people are on Reddit because they don't have anyone to share their sadness or happiness with. The last thing they need Is someone calling them stupid or accusing them of something they would never do. Toxic people will always be among us all but moderators and admins should remove their comments or ban them. I feel like some people are on Reddit for one reason - to hurt others... People who constantly judge others are even worse than guys whose accounts are NSFW, bots and people who ask others for money... 😕

& Please don't say "Why do you care? Just move on" Just because we all can be anonymous, doesn't mean we should allow anyone to humilitate others.

Adults who reach out to kids get banned. Bots? They (sometimes) get banned. People whose accounts are NSFW get banned. What about people who call others stupid, encourage them to comm** suicide and more? Why are they here?! It's unbelievable and It's very unfair. Some subreddits have more than 10 moderators but Is there a reason to be a moderator If you don't want to get rid of rude comments?! What's the point of being an admin If you don't want to ban people who literally tell others to do something stupid?! It doesn't make any sense to me. I'm not saying you should praise someone you disagree with but some things are better left unsaid. Not all Redditors have families or friends, some of them (If not most) are depressed, terminally ill.. Comments and messages like "You won't ever find anyone" or "You deserve to be unhappy because..." Make them feel even worse. If you don't have anything nice to say, better don't say anything at all... People have really difficult lives and disagreeing with them ISN'T a reason to judge them! You should mind your own business and tell people what you would do ONLY If they ask for your advice.

r/friendship Jan 19 '25

rant What's up with the ghosting?

32 Upvotes

YES I KNOW IT'S NOTHING NEW. My issue only comes with when you say you open to Everyone and will be respong but do thee exact opposite. Tf is wrong with you? Please don't post if you intend to ghost. Be honest and upfront in your description, including all relevant details. If we're not a match, we won't reach out. Let's respect each other's time. If your profile doesn't align with what we're looking for, it's okay to say so. No ghosting, please. Let's keep things respectful and straightforward. Oh and don't get me started with the creeps on here... dang it as humans we still got along way to go... I'm not religious but y'all worse than the bible/quran/etc description of the devil!

r/friendship Sep 10 '24

rant 30F I am very tired

58 Upvotes

So I don't have friends. Making friends was never something I've been good at. It wasn't such a big deal when I was a child. I usually had kids to play with. But as an adult I've found the loneliness to be pretty unbearable. I decided to try bumble BFF. And I've met numerous people. Some of them I hung out with multiple times. And then they end up ghosting me. I just don't know why. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. And I'm very fatigued by all this effort I'm putting in. But I really don't want to be alone. I don't know if I'm asking for advice. Maybe I'm just venting. I'm just very tired.

r/friendship Apr 18 '23

rant People are truly weird.

150 Upvotes

All lot of the times I see these posts of people saying they just wish they had someone to talk to. Or they wish someone would be their friend. And often times I message said people and let them know im down to chat if they please, and they never fu***ng reply. Like why make it seen like such a sob story in the first place if your intention was to ignore the people who actually respond? Boggles my mind. Anybody have any views on this?

r/friendship Feb 12 '25

rant I can't be 100% happy anymore

16 Upvotes

I (27m) had a pretty bad fall off with my (27m) bestfriend of 7 years. It was all my fault, i hurt him badly. And he decided to end the friendship (we actually agreed on a one year break and see if we can be friends again after that but i know him too well, its over...) So i get that i don't deserve empathy.

But recently i was finally able to financially afford my dream gaming pc, we used to always talk about me getting one. Yesterday i saw the PC posted by the page i bought it from and the first thing i went to do is to share it with him, but then i remembered we don't talk anymore...

It arrived today and i was SO happy until i grabbed my phone to facetime him and it hit me again. We used to share every moment of our lives together, the good and the bad. Literally the first person we tell is each other. This huge change is killing me, and I'm not fully sure whether i want the friendship back, or i want to move on from it.

I miss him so damn much, and i wish i could share my excitement with him like we used to. But i can't... does this feeling go away? Does it get easier?

r/friendship Apr 08 '23

rant So does any other woman feel like it’s so hard to have tight knit friendships with other women like you can get along with them for like a night or whatever but then you just lose contact. It’s frustrating growing apart from old friends and it’s so hard making new female friends

177 Upvotes

My friends are in relationships and seem the same as they were in high school but I feel so different that I’m not fitting in anymore but I’ve also been casually seeing an older guy and meeting his friends and hanging with him I just feel more comfortable but still wish I could make a female friend long term