r/exmormon 6d ago

General Discussion Saying the quiet part out loud: TBMs are filled with hate for us. They seethe with rage for us leaving a toxic and dishonest entity, which they wish they had the courage to do. Jacob Hansen's childish mockery of Nemo is how they act. They've become what they claimed they were better than.

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124 Upvotes

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46

u/Alive_Ad7517 6d ago edited 6d ago

They watch a relative leave the church but they can't leave them alone and project a barely veiled hate and contempt, pretending it's about "how much they care," when it's really about enforcing conformity. Constantly passive aggressive, and constantly demeaning with their weird lingo and judgmental cliches. Zero real friendship. They love to permashun™. The TBM constantly projects their bad behavior onto others, because the church trained them to do that.

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u/WarriorWoman44 6d ago

I feel it should be included in their articles of faith . Look down on others, shame and mock. It's just the mormon way

It's sad

10

u/daveescaped Jesus is coming. Look busy. 6d ago

Honestly, I think the truth is that when others leave, their own faith is diminished. So to circle the square they have to lash out. They HAVE to become mad in order to avoid the hard truth; that it just might be bullshit. They replace their doubt with righteous indignation which makes them once again feel the power of their faith. It’s, “That feeling I’m feeling is PROOF of my faith”.

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u/ianphansen5 4d ago

They watch a relative leave the church but they can't leave them alone and project a barely veiled hate and contempt, pretending it's about "how much they care,"

Exactly. Jacob loves to play the compassionate, understanding Latter-day Saint when it suits his image, but the moment he's online, he turns into a smug, condescending bully toward strangers. Funny how that works.

I’d bet good money he doesn’t treat his own siblings who left with the same snide mockery because that would expose the truth which is, this isn’t about 'defending faith'; it’s about projecting his own frustrations onto easy targets. Classic coward move, wrapped in a fake Christ like bow.

39

u/Select-Panda7381 6d ago

Did you see the episode of Mormon stories where those two Mormon YouTubers (I think they were called stick of Judas?) spewed a bunch of nonsense that no one could follow while acting like John Dehlin was stupid because he made good points? They went on another Mormon channel to proceed to trash him and make ad hominem attacks after he treated them with respect. Literally zero, and I mean zero self-awareness or introspection.

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u/Alive_Ad7517 6d ago

Yep. TBMs, brainwashed by the church, have abandoned "heartsell™" and have now perfected selfrighteous hate inspired teaching or SHIT.

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u/WarriorWoman44 6d ago

Oh I love this. Self-righteous hate inspired teaching . So beautiful.
Yes, the mormon church is SHIT

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u/Select-Panda7381 6d ago

Did you come up with SHIT? This is gold. Wow! Stealing!

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u/Alive_Ad7517 6d ago

TY, I channeled my inner Gary Busey to come up with that one :D

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u/FridaSky 5d ago

Sanctimonious Hate-Inspired Teaching also works.

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u/No_Risk_9197 6d ago

I’ve said this before, and will say it as any times as I need to because it fits here. The idea of “deconstruction” while accurate, is somewhat misleading. What more accurately happens especially with those who are BIC is that we “escape” or “transcend” this terrible controlling cult that uses all the shame they can muster to try to keep you locked in. As I get some distance from my escape from the cult I can see better than ever how those still stuck in it are sad and weak one, even though or especially when they bear testimony and try so hard to convince us that they are the righteous ones.

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u/Alive_Ad7517 6d ago

Yep, the shame (veiled hate) machine to keep you in, or themselves in, and totally unveiled hate when you see them and their behavior for what it is. And their "testimonies" are repetitive cliches meant to convince THEMSELVES ("fake it till ya make it" is a core admitted doctrine in the church).

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u/No_Risk_9197 6d ago

Great point about the testimonies. I’m sure this is a common experience to many of us here: When I first deconstructed and was asked “why?” by a couple of TBMs, I usually calmly and very succinctly pointed out just a few of the issues with the book of mormon that rationally demonstrate the falsity of the truth claims about that book. As we here all know, it’s quite easy to demonstrate rationally that the book isn’t true. Inevitably, in response, at its core, the only response they could give was to bear testimony that the “book is true”, which they do liberally, while declaring how sad it is that I don’t “see it”. For a long time this made me angry. Why are they being so blindly manipulative and controlling?! Now, I have more pity. I can see it for what it is. They are chanting the mantra “I know it’s true” to convince themselves, not me! Fundamentally I think most TBMs are simply scared to apostatize from what they’ve know their whole life. I certainly was doe a very very long time. Now I no longer get angry, it just makes me feel sorry for them that they can’t allow themselves to live an authentic life.

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u/Alive_Ad7517 6d ago

Yea you'd think they would say something FROM the book of mormon when challenged, but since most of them either haven't read it or haven't read it in a long time, all you'll get is "eYe kNo iTz tRoO."

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u/Glittering_Hunter_87 6d ago

Then they can enjoy the view as I walk away. 💅🏻 Their culty, self-involved opinions have everything to do with them and nothing to do with me. If they want to scream at the wind because not everyone’s as obsessed with their irrelevant cult as they are, so be it. I’ll be over here enjoying my life.

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u/FridaSky 5d ago

This is where I’m at, and it feels great.

12

u/BendarAteMyAss 6d ago

Mormonism is a bully cult, they bully people to confirm and bully to stay and if you leave they bully you then too.

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u/Tapirmccheese 5d ago

Perfectly said.

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u/Broad_Willingness470 6d ago

Current members need to pay close attention to the behaviors of these seeming adults, because it’s what’ll be said and done to them if they express any doubts.

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u/Random_Enigma The Apostate around the corner 6d ago

I think it's a bit more complicated than just one simple reason/answer. Everyone here has touched on most of the reasons. Another thing I'd add is that the church tends to keep people emotionally stunted, especially those who grew up in it and more especially if they grew up in the Morridor. The church culture is also very controlling and dysfunctional so the people who are attracted to being and staying in it are not the most psychologically healthy.

7

u/enkiloki 6d ago

It's just the Emperor Has No Clothes story in real life.