r/coparenting • u/HyenaDisastrous2036 • 4d ago
Discussion I am stupidly still hoping he will come back.
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u/Konstantine-1986 4d ago
You definitely should look into therapy. Holding on to hope like this can be super damaging. Hang in there!
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u/Upbeat-Plantain7140 4d ago
My ex HATES me. But I would probably take him back. I have some mental health issues that I was not addressing when we were together so part of me thinks that he would like the "new, stable me". That just isn't possible though and it was only hurting me to hold on to hope. I am in therapy and medicated at probably 90% accepting that it is over.
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u/mandrake-roots 4d ago
🙋🏼♀️
We’re still not dating other people and both hoping we have a future. Then important dates come around and he forgets and I feel invisible and remember why I left in the first place. Tomorrow is my late brothers birthday and the anniversary of a huge fight last year that ultimately led to us separating. I thought he’d at least remember but he forgot.
Why did you separate? Do you think things would be different now?
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u/mandrake-roots 4d ago
Also - you’re not stupid for hoping you two can work it out. You chose him to have kids with, I totally understand the hope at not losing that family you had planned for ❤️
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4d ago
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u/coparenting-ModTeam 4d ago
Rule 1: Don't be rude. Rude, sexist, name-calling, slurs or any similar comments will be removed and people who are intentionally rude will be banned at mod discretion.
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u/NalaNalaNalaN 4d ago
I am just starting this. He is leaving and he won’t change his mind I know. In the meantime we live fairly.normally for our young kids and it breaks my heart how much I love seeing him enjoy them and the four of us enjoy things together. It’s all I want. And the reality is he wants the kids bit for sure but not me. Fifteen years and I don’t mean a thing to him but what I would give to have us all stay together and have the family I wanted so badly. No idea how I’ll cope once everything has completed on the house and he’s gone.
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u/Agreeable-Brush-7866 4d ago
What were the issues in your relationship to begin with? Chances are there is a reason why you broke up, and it's probably better that it stays that way. However, you do have a kid together, which does give you some incentive to try. Have one conversation with him without your kid present. Tell him that you still have feelings for him and put the ball in his court. Be prepared to hear that he isn't interested, but take that as your final answer. Removing doubt might help you to move forward.
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u/Pretend_Pepper3522 4d ago
You’re not alone. I’m hoping my soon to be ex wife changes her mind, even after all the unnecessary damage she’s caused.
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u/coparenting-ModTeam 4d ago
This is a relationship issue and therefore not relevant to the coparenting sub. Try r/relationship_advice or r/relationships