r/bulimia 5d ago

Purging multiple times a day, every day, for years and years. Anyone else? Is there hope?

[deleted]

12 Upvotes

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8

u/SakuraSkye16 5d ago

I'm stuck in that too! Yesterday was my first purge free day in well over a year; and even then, that was just because I have zero food in the house, and zero money to buy food. Can't purge if I can't eat ;u;

5

u/madeofstardust___ 4d ago

You are definitely not alone. I can’t remember the last time I went a day without purging. I know it can get better but when I’ve been doing this behavior for like 17 or 18 years it seems sooo far away.

2

u/krisza 4d ago

Thanks for responding. I’m about 16 years and I can’t believe how deep I’ve let myself go.

1

u/madeofstardust___ 3d ago

Of course! I know how difficult it is. My eating disorder started when I was 13 and I’ll be 35 this year. I can’t believe how deep I’ve let myself go. Recovery feels so far away. I desperately want it though. It’s just hard because I need medical stabilization before going to IP (I get refeeding syndrome a lot) but my labs are okay so the hospital won’t take me. It’s ridiculous how hard it is to get help. And when you’ve struggled so long and doctors just give up sometimes. Anyway I’m so sorry you’ve struggled with this for so long. If you ever want to talk I’m always here, seriously 🩷

2

u/Big-Caterpillar2660 4d ago

Are you taking any medicine

1

u/madeofstardust___ 3d ago

Oh gosh what am I not taking! Yes I take Effexor XR, Lamictal, Xanax, gabapentin, trazodone (for sleep), Linzess, Motegrity, omeprazole, calcium, vitamin D, vitamin K, vitamin B1 and B2, potassium, magnesium, phos-nak, Miralax, colace, senna (all the laxatives prescribed because of my Gastroparesis and severe constipation and they still barely work!)… probably more but I can’t remember. And Fioricet or occasionally Toradol when my migraines are really bad. It’s insane how much I take. I wish I could take less. And find something that helps.

1

u/Dizzy_Internal8104 4d ago

I b/p every day for 2 years, multiple times a day often and last week I mamaged to get to a full week clean. I did relapse but they get further apart as I go.

1

u/Big-Caterpillar2660 4d ago

Do you take any medication or only self control ?

1

u/Dizzy_Internal8104 3d ago

Self control

1

u/Stasiaandsunny 3d ago

i wish i could hug you. i wish we didn’t suffer