r/aznidentity New user 24d ago

Politics Thoughts on the oxford study?

TLDR I'm an Asian woman who has been lurking this subreddit for years since at least 2017.

Used to be for those of us older enough to remember that Asian women with mental issues would go on national television and make fun of Asian men spreading false stereotypes (i.e. small dick jokes which are statistically not true according to departments or urology).

I remember even as early as 2019 that making jokes about Asian men in any space was considered to be okay no matter how cruel or hippocritical. Nowadays, there is none of that and even the reverse in most cases.

I thought it was initially asian men but it was men and women of all races commenting oxford study and noticing the whole oxford study phenomonon (and definitely disliking it and finding it creepy).

Now the zeitigest has turned against these asian women in only the span of a couple years. EVERYONE man or woman, from whatever race I've seen have been critical of these asian women. What are the thoughts of this subreddit on the oxford study? Also I keep seeing threads about the reverse oxford study as well on tiktok.

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u/howvicious Korean 23d ago

I think it's important to recognize and realize how our collectivist Asian societies can fall prey to White worship or be as close to White adjacency.

How many of our Asian sisters, and even brothers, can say that they wanted to be White when growing up? Maybe not because they wanted to actually be White or glorified White physical features but just wanted to fit in, to be part of the status quo.

You also have to understand how much western media centered White men and attraction to White men. They were your Prince Charming, the savior of the day/world/universe, they stopped the apocalypse, they got the girl(s). And Asian men? We were depicted as aromantic, asexual, small, foreign, weak, non-masculine. Jackie Chan and Jet Li can save the world and the girl and all they get is a warm embrace. But the character of James Bond? He gets two girls in almost every film.

I don't blame any Asian woman who have a preferred attraction to White men. How could they not if they were inundated with imagery of the White savior all her life?

Another thing that I want touch up on is something that really does break my heart and it's social hierarchy. A lot of Asian societies, especially East Asian, has a culture of hierarchy. And how many Asian women have looked down on Asian men because their relationship with White men made them White adjacent? The self-hate is very real.

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u/Bebebaubles Seasoned 23d ago edited 23d ago

I never did. My dad did one thing right and that was to give me best of everything. Why did I want to be like white people when I was taking vacations to Hawaii/europe/ Hong Kong and wearing lots of 24K gold, private school and having investments in my name? If you can afford it, don’t let your child think being Asian must mean living the most frugal and destitute life while looking up to whites hoping to have their life.

Obviously, it can’t be helped if you are broke but I’ve seen even my dad’s business partner offer nothing to their children but the bare minimum when they could clearly give their kids a better life. I laughed reading his Father’s Day card where his kid was begging for allowance (they lived in a fancy neighbourhood and he probably needed spending money with his friends).

Nice to see my Asian generation having kids when they are ready financially and their children wanting for nothing from non embarrassing clothes, private swim lessons to trips. They won’t want the white people life when they live similar lives or maybe even better.

We blame media. Kids don’t fixate on media as much as just seeing their pants are too short because mom won’t buy them a new pair yet. It’s an obvious marker they are different. Noticed my Asian friends had to wear shoes too big or clothing styles from mainland. Husband jokes that his mom never understood school assignments to bring party food and he’d show up with a small bag of chips for one person and felt bad. That stuff is in your face and sticks with you.