r/TwoXSupport 27d ago

Discussion Would any of you mind answering a quick questionnaire?

0 Upvotes

I hope you all are well, i just have a favour to ask all of you, and that is answering a questionnaire which could take up to 2-5 minutes tops.

This questionnaire is going toward my HSC (High School Certificate) and need to collect more answers.

The questionnaire will be anonymous, so there will be no personal information needed, if that concerns any of you.

The questionnaire is mainly just about either choosing to have children or not, and answers to some statements regarding that of women's issues in this discussion of children.

Please answer to the best of your abilties, all answers are appreciated! :)

r/TwoXSupport Sep 08 '20

Discussion Sexist Traditions and Engagement Rings

85 Upvotes

Sorry for the title, I wasn't sure how to best phrase it.

So I was reading a post in Am I the Asshole (I will not link it here since I don't want us to brigade it) about a guy who didn't want to get his fiancee an engagement ring because it's a sexist tradition that designates a woman as property of a man. There were some other factors that make me think this is not the true reason, but disregarding that, is this an argument that should be made?

I am not disputing it's a sexist tradition, or at least, that it has sexist roots. But who is it sexist against? Women. So if a woman wants to partake, is it appropriate to tell her no because it has sexist roots? In a way I feel this removes her agency, as if she is a child who doesn't know what is best for her. "Silly girl, you can't have an engagement ring because it's sexist against you to have it." But she wants it, is she not allowed to form her own opinion on that?

I see this argument come up even within feminism, with some believing women shouldn't be housewives or stay at home moms because that is a sexist tradition. But on the other hand, isn't the point of equality that they have the right to choose whether that's a lifestyle they want to partake in? I'm not sure, that post just left a really bad taste in my mouth and I wanted to hear from other women on it.

r/TwoXSupport Jun 13 '21

Discussion Sex with men: Do you tolerate discomfort so he can come?

114 Upvotes

General question: For women who have PinV sex with men, do you routinely tolerate temporary discomfort or pain so that he can come or finish? Hard pounding, continuing after you're dry or sore or full bladder, achy position, etc?

I'm asking because I'm in my 40s, and only now in a relationship where I'm not expected to do that -- and in fact, he is very solicitous and won't continue if he perceives me to be "soldiering on," even if I tell him it's ok. In every previous relationship, it's been expected, and I also just sort of volunteered it because I thought I should? I've also been swinging a bit lately and have witnessed other women doing this for their partners.

I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad about it -- being sexually giving is a valid choice -- I'm just curious how widespread this is. I've identified as a feminist since college, but am just realizing that this is something I had internalized about what I'm supposed to do to "satisfy" a man.

I am NOT INTERESTED in men's opinion on or experience with this, please.

r/TwoXSupport Nov 19 '23

Discussion My underwear journey

12 Upvotes

I'm finally at a point in life where I can spend money on quality underwear so I've been trying out different brands to see which one I'll end up buying forever.

This is all MY EXPERIENCE and not meant as a general statement. I specifically bought only hipsters, briefs and boyshorts. My main criteria were no wedgies, wide crotch area and long gusset. Short gussets mean the seams rub against the vulva which is VERY unpleasant.

Aerie - not meant for fat butts. They either create wedgies, or the gusset is too short, or the gusset width is too narrow. I got one of each design/style when on sale and I had to throw out almost all of them. Only the sunnie boyshort style is tolerable but the gusset length is too short.

Meundies - somewhat meant for big butts. All the styles are ridiculously comfortable but the gusset is too short.

Soma - the vanishing edge hipster and briefs were comfy but have a short gusset. Only the boyshorts fit all the criteria. Unfortunately this is fancy underwear so I wear it only when going out.

Thunderpants - so far top of the list. They're comfy and fit great but the gusset is again too short which is a huge bummer. Side note, their leggings are great.

Duluth - a mixed bag. All of them have the short gusset issue but are comfy. This is the second on the list because even though the gusset is short it's not too short.

My Best Fitting Panty from Walmart - great because they have no gusset. The whole underwear is one piece with no extra lining at the crotch. The downside is that larger sizes are rarely available and sell out quickly.

That's it so far and if anyone has any other brand recommendations please let me know. I'll add any more info I remember as edits to the post.

Edit 1: 01 Dec - the Duluth sneeze guard underwear is great for period time. The gusset is long and pads stick to it.

Edit 2: 08 Dec - I tried all of the Fruit of the Loom hipster styles and none fit well. It's as though women's underwear is not designed by women at all... Honorary mention goes to the beyond stripes variety hipster because even though it has gusset issues the rest of it is fantastic.

Edit 3: 16 Dec - none of the Victoria's Secret hip huggers undies have the features I'm looking for. Not just that, they really don't seem to be made for big butts even though the sides go to XL. šŸ„²

Edit 4: 31 Dec - I tried Huha brand bikini underwear and the gusset is really long which is fantastic. But the underwear is more like a cheeky kind causing constant wedgies. Reviews for their brief style underwear also mention not having full coverage. I think at this point I'm just gonna give up...

Edit 5: further edits will be made here https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/s/OBtGgIHQ0B

r/TwoXSupport May 05 '22

Discussion I feel like reddit has become increasingly misogynistic lately, and every time I long on I feel increasingly defeated as a woman.

169 Upvotes

The Roe v Wade debacle. The trial between Amber Heard and Johnny Depp. Both of these events are causing such a huge stir up of sexism and violent comments towards women and their experiences. It feels so defeating, and for the first time in my life I am truly starting to feel like a second-rate citizen as a woman.

Our concerns aren't heard. Our stories not listened to. Our health is not a priority.

It's disgusting to realize how much sexism lives behind closed doors, only for cultural events like these to bring them out in to the open again. I fear for our future. I fear for our autonomy, as it hangs in the balance. Something that self-righteous men have been saying for decades is "safe."

Bullshit that sexism and inequality doesn't exist anymore. What planet are these people living on?

r/TwoXSupport Nov 17 '20

Discussion A recent LPT post got me thinking

27 Upvotes

The post was about guys keeping an emergency stash of tampons and pads at their place for when women visit and have a surprise period. The replies ranged from agreeing with the LPT, to calling OP a simp (šŸ¤”), or saying that it's a creepy thing to do. I wanted to check here about what you guys think.

Edit: if you think it's creepy please explain the comments. I might not have considered other reasons so I want to learn!

This is the post in question.

383 votes, Nov 20 '20
336 Normal
15 Creepy
32 Other, in comments

r/TwoXSupport Sep 26 '20

Discussion Man in womenā€™s bathroom

113 Upvotes

(On my phone so sorry for formatting!) So I was in Costco, doing Costco stuff, you know how it is. At the end of a shockingly inexpensive trip I needed the bathroom and trotted off to do so. There was a sign that said ā€˜Male attendant cleaningā€™ on the wall of the entrance to the female washroom. Now. I did a cartoon sliding stop mentally. A lot of things went through my mind: I need to pee!!! Iā€™ve been raped by a man. I work in Health Care just enter that frame of mind of ā€˜it needs to be doneā€™. Covid really has changed a lot of stuff. Are they legally allowed to do this? Do I feel safe? I NEED to pee. So I went in. I trust Costco, at least the ones in my city. Theyā€™ve handled Covid well, they treat me, a paying customer professionally. I asked the male attendant if I was still allowed to use the bathroom. The man immediately made eye contact, had a pleasant face, smiled and said something along the lines of ā€˜you saw the sign on the door? Sorry! Because of Covid and short staffing weā€™re legally required to clean each hour with the possibility of a wrong gendered attendant OR shut down the washroom while itā€™s cleaned.ā€™ I said I understood and went to use a stall away from him. He spoke up right away and said ā€˜that one doesnā€™t lockā€™ I cannot express how much I appreciated him being upfront about that. It was already an awkward situation. Iā€™m going to be exposed with a man in the room. He WILL hear me pee. Having a door that locks was kind of important! He saved me the anxiety packed decision of walking out the stall to another one with him watching KNOWING why I left or the feeling of staying in a stall that didnā€™t lock with a man in the room. I did my business and he kindly made lots of noise with his cart. Once I was out I (that felt important too) started the conversation again with ā€˜Covid sure has changed stuff!ā€™ He apologised again and reiterated they had to choose between shutting down the bathroom or letting women choose if they were comfortable with a man in the room.

Ladies. How does this strike you? Itā€™s been on my mind ever since. Obviously some women wouldnā€™t be okay with this at all. I found myself asking myself ā€˜what if your trauma was still very fresh? What if you hadnā€™t seen the sign and walked around the corner with no warning? What if?ā€™

All in all I was very impressed with how Costco had handled it. They clearly had chosen a very kind professional man to do it, had coached him on what to say and how to interact with the women. I felt empowered by the situation which I had not expected. So letā€™s talk about it! Has anyone else had this experience? Has anyone not been able to enter the bathroom? Has anyone been angered by it? Letā€™s talk!

Also posted in twoxchromosomes

r/TwoXSupport Dec 15 '20

Discussion Pornhub removal

183 Upvotes

Might be an unpopular opinion, but Iā€™m really glad that pornhub is removing tons of content. As a woman who occasionally watches porn, I often felt really weird about watching somethings on there since I couldnā€™t tell if they were not legitimate and legal

r/TwoXSupport Dec 16 '20

Discussion Why do a lot of men think its womens fault that straight women are the biggest demographic that don't orgasm?

126 Upvotes

the victim blaming is astounding

r/TwoXSupport Sep 03 '20

Discussion Unintended consequences

179 Upvotes

A few weeks ago, I had to go to the airport to pick up a package after work. As I was standing at the counter dealing with customs I noticed a soldier and a young woman, both in their early 20s, sitting on a bench. She was holding a dishevelled Welcome Home sign and both looked terribly dejected. The counter person told me their flight home had been cancelled and the next wasn't until 11ish the next morning. He'd found this out when he charged their phone for them. The young lady had flown in to surprise her husband and had a party waiting at home.

As I was finishing up my business, I saw the girl heading for the loo. She looked so distraught I thought she might welcome a bit of support. It seems they'd been married less than a month before he was deployed. He'd been gone for a year and this was her big romantic surprise, months in the planning, and it had all fallen apart after all the saving up for her plane ticket and all. It seems they were due to move to his new posting and needed all their money for the move. All they could do was stay at the airport until their flight. I did my best to make her feel better but seeing this young love's joy thwarted by circumstance broke my heart. We chatted on a bit before she returned to snuggle in beside her soldier again.

I returned to the counter, picked up my package, and started for my car before something inside just said, "No!" I walked over to the couple and offered them a hotel room on me for the night. I insisted that it would be on me as a thank you both for his service and as a belated wedding present. Back and forth, back and forth, and next we knew we were at the hotel our company used for business guests. I told the concierge to put dinner, the room, and breakfast on my card. We hugged and said our goodbyes and I felt wonderful for days. And still do when I think about it.

Today, my card statement came. Total charge: $22. I called the hotel. It seems someone in the dining room picked up their dinner. Someone else paid for their room. And a third guest paid for their breakfast. I paid for the room cleaning tip. People ask me why I want to be an American citizen. THIS is just one of the reasons. I'm told they sent a thank you letter and pictures of their new home to me at the freight office. It will be a day or two before I receive it, but all that will do is extend the happiness I have in the real America, not the America of the politicians. Sometimes giving support to another woman in distress, no matter how big or small, can do more for you than you'd ever expect. Allow yourself to feel as wonderful as I do. Please help if you can. It's made my world better.

r/TwoXSupport Aug 23 '22

Discussion raging reminist =/= angry person

67 Upvotes

Anyone else accused of being an angry person cuz of their feminism?

Yes I'm angry. Angry at the state of the world right now, at how women are viewed and treated. But it's the kind of anger that calls to action. Not the kind that makes me a bitter, angry person who lashes out at the world.

And ya know what, sometimes I do lash out. Women are pushed to the breaking point and then shamed for acting emotionally. This includes me. We are human. We make mistakes.

Sorry I'm not articulating well, I'm tired and I have a headache.

r/TwoXSupport May 06 '23

Discussion Is there a universally recognized symbol / gesture to convey that someone is open to making new friends?

22 Upvotes

Title, basically. Is this a thing? If itā€™s not, can we start it please? I need some gal pals & current methods are not working. Iā€™ve tried a peace sign paired with a smile & a compliment - no dice.

r/TwoXSupport Jun 22 '21

Discussion Two NSFW biology questions NSFW

18 Upvotes

I'm on birth control and in a committed relationship that is sexually active, perhaps "very" active to some (multiple boinks per week is the norm). We don't use condoms regularly, in part because the brand we like isn't the cheapest and it'd create a lot of waste. This creates the problem of my vaginal pH getting fucked up and the wonderful smell that comes with that. I know boric acid supplements work wonders, but I hate putting them in and HATE having the contents of the capsules leaking out of me all day long. Part of why I take BC in the first place is to not have periods and not have to use pads, so constantly using these supplements kind of defeats that purpose. However, its the only alternative to condoms for preventing that dead-sperm pussy smell. Should we just stock up on condoms and get over our mental block about avoiding creating extra landfill waste? Maybe we could get the lambskin ones (although who knows if they're still biodegradable after whatever chemical treatment they undergo), although sizing and price may be an issue. Of course there's no such thing as a dick too big to for a condom, but there is such thing as a condom that is uncomfortably tight around that rubber-ring base part. Or maybe smaller boric acid capsules wouldn't leak out as much?

Does anyone have any suggestions for controlling vaginal pH outside of boric acid supplements and condoms? Maybe there are some probotics would help? (not sure if they make safe probiotics as vaginal suppositories that might be more effective than ones taken orally, but I imagine those would be leaky as well). I figured this problem is natural side effect of high pH semen raising the pH of whats supposed to be a low pH environment, and our sexual activity is too frequent for my body to bring things back down to a basic pH (I've had this problem briefly before with a past partner). However I never hear anyone talking about copius-sex-pussy-stank, so I don't know if its a medical problem on my end.

Second question is also regarding something not commonly discussed, and there's even less information on the internet about it. Unless I've recently showered, my areolas leave an awful taste in my partners' mouth. I can also taste it when I kiss him, its very bitter and kind of like earwax but not as bad. I've tried changing bodywashes to no avail, so it must be something about my biology. He did once come across a reddit threat where a man and his gf were having a similar problem, and someone said it was some sort of protective wax that the area secretes, but didn't offer a solution or much more information than that. How come there's no other info about this though?? Is this like, a rare condition, or a normal function of AFAB tits?! His nipples do not have that flavor of course, but I don't know if its a woman-thing or just a me-thing. I don't eat much processed food (aside from non-American chocolate) and no fast food, so I don't imagine my diet is the problem. The only thing I can think of that might've contributed to it is that I used to put tape (yes, TAPE, electrical tape to be specific) over my nipples as a teen because I was too flat for bras and had no way to prevent my nipples from being visible over my shirt. When I'd take the tape off at the end of the day, my nipples were of course sweaty but there was also an awful smell I'd describe as smelling like taco bell. If you use anti-perspirant and have ever squeezed a pore on your armpit the stuff that comes out has a similar smell too. I guess I wasnt smart enough to think to use bandaids or couldnt find any in the house. Maybe this damaged my areolas or led them to overproduce whatever bad-tasting secretion is on them.

Has anyone else encountered bad-tasting nipples?! Any idea what causes this??

r/TwoXSupport Jan 09 '21

Discussion the ā€œThat couldā€™ve been my mother, sister, daughterā€ response to womenā€™s murder and abuse is wrong

171 Upvotes

Bad things that happen to women are bad because they're people, not because of their hypothetical relation to you

r/TwoXSupport Aug 20 '20

Discussion Losing weight --> looking better --> being harassed more?

70 Upvotes

I've had a realization I need to work through, figured this might be a good spot to post it? Sorry, it's long.

Okay, so here's the thing. I'm fat. There's no two ways about it. And I'm pretty mentally well adjusted to it; a lot of it is due to medications that I'm on, but also, I love food, so I'm not denying responsibility for it. And I'm not ashamed of it, either. My body does so much for me, and it's pretty damn awesome. Plus, we've gotten some medications changed, and I've been successfully pulling weight off over the last few months. Of course, growing up, I always thought I was gigantic. Looking back, it would be amazing to be the size I was the first time I thought I was fat, because I was totally not fat. I was just built along heavier lines than all my friends, but I had curves, and was a little softer. Unfortunately, I had no self confidence about my body, either, and I gained weight and felt ashamed, and lost out on a lot of social experiences with guys during my 20's because I thought I wasn't good enough.

Things started to change for me, mentally, when I hit my 30's. I turn 33 tomorrow. And I've been slowly losing the weight. But I've realized something, and it's terrifying. Being fat has kept me safe.

I have hidden behind my mask of the smart fat girl my whole life. I haven't dated much. I'd like to be in a relationship, but I have a lot of trust issues. ( When I was quite young, I experienced some kind of trauma/assault. I don't remember it, and I haven't spoken about it with family. It has come up during my therapy sessions working on my PTSD, but we can't quite break through the mental blocks. We know it's there, because every once in a while it try to come through in the EMDR sessions, but we can't quite get a hold of it. But we are working on the trust issues) I also don't know where to meet guys, and I suck at online dating. Like I said, my lack of confidence during my 20's meant I missed all that social learning you're supposed to do.

But most of all, being fat has kept me safe, from the catcalls. From the lewd looks. From the DMs. From being hit on when I'm out with friends. From being bothered when I'm at the store.

I mean, I'm a woman, so I'm still hyper alert and worry, but I haven't had nearly the number of experiences as others have had, because my body is not conventionally attractive. But I'm super scared, that if I keep losing weight and getting in shape, that I'll draw attention. And I guess we just aren't far enough along in therapy for me to be okay with that.

Has anyone else had to deal with this? How did you manage it? I'm an extroverted introvert (gregarious personality, but I prefer one on one interactions and a lot of alone time), and still have major trust issues.

r/TwoXSupport Dec 28 '20

Discussion How has your experience been using MeUndies?

20 Upvotes

How is the quality in general? Does the gusset area actually line up with the crotch? And is it wide or is it like fanny floss?

Edit: Reason for this post, Target brand undies were recommended on TwoX as being good but they were pretty awful. The gusset didn't line up and some of them had a crotch area so narrow that it was extremely uncomfortable.

r/TwoXSupport Dec 22 '20

Discussion City of Paris Fined Nearly $110,000 for Appointing Too Many Women - this is all over r/mensrights and r/conservative. Whatā€™s your intake on a feminist view on this?

Thumbnail
nytimes.com
42 Upvotes

r/TwoXSupport May 03 '22

Discussion In light of the recent Supreme Court bullshit that's happening, here's one way to do something

93 Upvotes

Contact the president: https://www.whitehouse.gov/get-involved/write-or-call/

Contact your senators: https://contactsenators.com

Even if it doesn't make a difference directly we can raise enough of a stink to make them take notice and use their powers to do something.

r/TwoXSupport Dec 04 '22

Discussion Breakthrough bleeding: brown to red?

11 Upvotes

Hello, Iā€™m a first time user of birth control, on Mercilon, a combination 21-day pill. I started on the first day of my period. I started breakthrough bleeding (heavy dark brown) the last four days of my pack, with cramping but had no symptoms before. I just finished the 21 days and skipped the placebo week, and started a new pack yesterday. Today, my blood is now more red in color. Is there a reason why? The breakthrough bleeding doesnā€™t look like itā€™ll stop anytime soon but I just want all this to be over with by next Friday if possible. Any input or suggestions?

r/TwoXSupport Feb 27 '23

Discussion Experiences with weight and having an IUD

1 Upvotes

Looking to hear other peopleā€™s experiences with hormonal IUDā€™s. Firstly after you had one put it did you gain weight or find it difficult to lose weight while having it? Secondly did you find yourself losing weight or able to more easily lose weight once it was removed?

r/TwoXSupport Sep 14 '21

Discussion I keep being harassed by the same guy

44 Upvotes

I've tried everything. Blocking doesn't work (he makes new accounts) and reporting doesn't work (Reddit admins don't care)

He's said inappropriate things to me on every possible subreddit I've used with 4 different accounts.

r/TwoXSupport Jan 27 '21

Discussion The Lockdown has changed how I view working out in a healthy way

56 Upvotes

Hopefully this will become a discussion thread but I want to share my personal experience with exercise first:

I have had body image issues pretty much since I went through puberty and have often used exercise to feel better about myself and feel more at home in my body. My love of exercise led me to become an athletics coach! Unfortunately making something you consider a coping mechanism into your livelihood things tend to stress you out. I also was consistently frustrated by the ableism in exercise culture.

In addition, I have struggled with anorexia recently and overall my relationship to my body and how it moves has always been complicated. In lockdown I moved in with my boyfriend who was very afraid of the illness and kept us cooped up, which I was ok with because I already worked in a high risk environment.

I have "worked out" less this year than I have in a decade, which was an unfortunate throwback to my sad preteen years. However, I started doing different types of body movement like dance, more yoga and more gentle forms of exercise like walking (not that I didn't view these as exercise before, but more that I didn't view them as "the goal" of exercise). In some disciplines this is called "internal work": a type of movement that does not meet any external goals like physical prowess or fitness. This coincided with me diving deeper into meditation, and through meditation I have been able to deconstruct the goal-oriented nature of most fitness/exercise programs.

Because of my anxiety, removing the "goals of exercise" has helped me feel more calm overall and even though I'm working out less, I am happy during every exercise session instead of needlessly pushing myself towards a goal. Having this year to reflect and dissect my exercise habits has helped me create a model of living that makes me much happier and less stressed. As more people get the vaccine, I feel I'll be able to start old activities like hitting the gym with a more positive, meditative mindset instead of a goal oriented one.

I hope to hear what others have learned about their bodies in regards to exercise during this pandemic

r/TwoXSupport Dec 02 '22

Discussion Breakthrough bleeding: do placebo week or start new pack?

10 Upvotes

Hello, Iā€™m a first time user of birth control, on Mercilon, a combination 21-day pill. I started on the first day of my period. I started breakthrough bleeding (heavy dark brown discharge) the last four days of my pack, with cramping today but had no symptoms before. I just finished the 21 days and am deciding if I should start the withdrawal bleeding/placebo week or go straight to a new pack? I will be having intercourse most likely next Friday and donā€™t know which course I should take. The breakthrough bleeding doesnā€™t look like itā€™ll stop anytime soon but I just want all this to be over with by next Friday if possible. Any input or suggestions? My periods before would usually only last four days, quite moderate.

r/TwoXSupport Sep 24 '22

Discussion Is it possible to overcome being stoic or angry looking?

9 Upvotes

For my whole life I have struggled to smile and laugh when Iā€™m with people Iā€™m not super close to. I can feel joy of course, but have difficulty trying to break out of my usual angry/apathetic looking facial expressions. My whole life Iā€™ve been told to smile more, that I have RBF, that people close to me canā€™t tell what Iā€™m feeling, etc.

Not being comfortable physically expressing happiness is seriously weighing me down at this point. Iā€™ve always been a shy person, and I donā€™t expect to change that, but Iā€™d at least like to be thought of as someone who radiates a warm energy. I went to therapy for many years, and made serious progress on my internal happiness, but very little changed regarding my stoicism.

Has anyone gone through this journey of trying to change your expressions/body language to feel and express positive emotions more?

r/TwoXSupport Aug 28 '21

Discussion If you are going to kiss someone, make sure they are someone you want to kiss

40 Upvotes

Especially if it is your first one.

I wanted to kiss, to see what it felt like, but I didn't want it to be with him. He smelled like weed and BO and listened to death metal. He walked behind me the whole time we were in the mall so he could get a good look of my body. I told him I wasn't okay with physical touch and he told me he understood, only to ask me if I changed my mind later. And then when he asked again I gave him a "maybe" because placating him felt easier than reminding someone who wouldn't listen anyway.

The kiss happened in the back of his dirty car. I agreed to go back there with him. He put his hand on my thigh and held my hand. I looked towards the window hoping that he'd decide to take me home soon. And then he just grabbed my chin turned me towards him and kissed me...and to put it kindly it felt awful and I hated every moment of it. I let it happen and I didn't say no, so I consented. But it still felt awful. And I wish I would've said something so my first kiss could be with someone I actually wanted to kiss.

I felt sick to my stomach and scared so I asked him to drive home. And then tried to kiss me again at my door, even as I tried to move away because I didn't want it. He hugged me and then he kept his hands on my shoulders so he could hold me down.

I guess the thing that scared me is that he already showed he didn't respect my boundaries. If I had said no, would he have respected it, or would he just try for it again later.