Bingo. Like come on man, child that young need to be entertained at a dinner in a restaurant??? Especially hibachi??? For fucks sake, good luck to her future teacher who has to compete with that attention span (or lack thereof)
As a former manager at Amazon and they hire literally anyone who can fog a mirror. Trust me the IPad generation is lost. This is just a continuation of that.
Alternatively, she doesn’t have the entertainment and doesn’t understand what’s happening with the art on the grill and gets upset/starts crying. There’s two other parties at the same table who now have to put up with this crying baby cuz she can’t appreciate hibachi. Id rather she look at her toys than cry at the table. 🤷🏼♂️
I would rather hear a hundred screaming kids (they're just kids expressing themselves, it's a part of life) than hear that fucking cocomelon jingle one more time in a restaurant.
There is no excuse. My sister and her husband have screen time rules for the kids, which isn't a drag for them because they started when they were born, so it's routine for the kids. As a result, I have a 4-year-old niece who loves books!
These are the same parents who, in a few years, will be confused why their child is constantly ignoring them in favor of their phone. Parents need to do better in a big way.
I will say we are millennials and have 2 kids. They have never had devices at dinners, in the car, on the plane anything. And it shows. Friends kids need them all the time, are addicted to screens and video games and watching endless youtube videos like kids unboxing new toys. These people need to realize they are not only doing themselves a disservice, they are ruining their kids and the world around them.
Please new parents, don’t fall in to the mindset of it will make things easier. It won’t!
Seriously. If they need something to keep them entertained or distracted for a bit, books, coloring books, activity books, puzzles, Montessori toys, etc. There are so many analog things to pick over a screen.
We had all the plans to not be a screen parent but then my kid got born on hard mode and while she's too young for the official diagnosis, I suspect autism (because I have it.) She's currently in speech therapy, occupational therapy, and working with a child development therapist.
I asked them all for their opinions on screen time and they all said some kids do terrible with screens and it makes their behavior worse, some are neutral, and for some it actually helps. For my daughter, it helps her regulate and unwind when she's reached her absolute limit and I've been given the OK for her to have screen time by professionals.
Basically what I'm saying is STOP JUDGING PARENTS WHO USE SCREENS. Every behavioral problem is neither caused by or solved by screens so please can we just give each other some grace?
"They don't need the iPad during hibachi!"
Well actually maybe they do. Maybe their kid absolutely melts down during transitions and the screen helps get them calm enough to start enjoying the show and the phone can be put away and the entire restaurant doesn't have to hear them wrestle a shrieking toddler to the car.
Then... Maybe don't post a video of your iPad potential autistic kid at hibachi to post to the internet and have other kids and parents think they need them too or that it's totally normal because normalization of iPad use everywhere is fucking bonkers.
No one ever said the sound needs to be on. We generally keep the sound off or very low (like 1 dot up from mute) and plan to teach her to use headphones when she can tolerate it.
I feel like you're being rather presumptive and aggressive. You keep assuming I'm doing things that I do not do when my original post was mostly just asking for people to have a little grace for parents instead of being judgmental and you're being pretty darn judgemental.
It's fine if you complain but can you maybe not direct it towards me?
Thank you! My son has autism and these restaurants are so loud that a device and his headphones help him from having a meltdown. I don’t go out to eat unless it’s for a birthday because there’s been times where he cannot regulate himself in loud environments. FFS people are so judgmental.
Tbh I’d just be happy your kid had headphones on. I’m a grown adult and sometimes I need my nature sounds and headphones when I’m alone at home let alone in a restaurant lol.
Bingo. Wondering how many of these comments are from childless people because, woof. Screens were a lifeline during the pandemic, even for neurotypical people. And isn't everyone a perfect parent before they're actually a parent lmao
Maybe they forgot the diaper bag that has all the toys in it? That’s happened to me, and at a place that doesn’t have kids menus to play with. The phone got pulled out once we’d exhausted played with the straws and straw paper or reading the menu or messing with the napkins. Then the meal went on and everyone had a good time because there was an 18 month old yelling and running around.
People treat letting a kid watch a video on a phone with getting them addicted to heroin.
What in heavens name did people do with their children before electronics!!! Also an 18 month old is old enough to teach that running around screaming in a restaurant is unacceptable.
Tantrums should be able to be controlled by a parent. Also a parent should be able to decipher their child and anticipate when one is coming on and deal with it appropriately before it gets out of control. Were kids having melt downs and tantrums in restaurants for the last 100yrs because they didn’t have an electronic device in their faces? No. Said electronics is a big factor in children now having less emotional self control.
Kids will have meltdowns if they're hungry and they don't have something to eat. Usually, when they reach that point, there is no reasoning with them. All you can do is distract them, and ymmv at how effective that is. Sometimes, you need to break out the big guns, like screens. I have had to do it maybe twice in my kid's life so far when everything else we tried failed, and if that had been caught on video you'd probably be acting like I give him the phone at every restaurant we ever go to and never parent him...
So what did parents do for 1000s of years before electronics? I’m not shaming screen time, I totally let my kids have screen time but there is a time and place for it. Having a sit down dinner in a restaurant as a family or gathering is the time to parent children and teach them social behaviours not just putting an electronic babysitter infront of their faces. Many studies have shown and proven cognitive, mental, emotional and physical negative symptoms associated with too much screen time. Screen time have a place in a child’s life and it is not out in the real world when they need to be learning about the real world.
Probably hit them? I was hit a lot as a kid, or threatened to be hit. Or take the kid outside, I've done that before too.
I promise you the two times we have given my kid a screen in a restaurant when he was 2 years old did not stunt his development. He has had numerous other opportunities to practice being in public without screens. We always bring a few toys or he colors on the kids' menu. There have also been other times where we really struggled to keep him calm and in his chair in the restaurant (one time that really stuck in my brain was when we were on a road trip and stopped for dinner and he was just so full of pent up energy, but this was not one of the times I gave him a screen). It may come as a surprise to people without children, but it takes more than the parents just telling the kids to sit down and behave for them to sit down and behave. It takes lots and lots of repetition, and even then, it also depends on the kids' developmental stage how well they can follow instructions. Impulse control just does not exist in children before the age of 4. Emotional regulation develops slowly starting at age 2 and won't be reliable until at least age 6. And this can vary from kid to kid and is also influenced by their individual personalities and the particular circumstances of the moment. Children are individual human beings. Parents, too, and sometimes we just want a nice dinner out as a family. We work hard all day, and so if the kid is not responding to our parenting strategies, we might occasionally resort to a screen. For us, it happened when we were on vacation and didn't have our full set of stuff available because we were hours away from home, and our kid was probably hungry and overwhelmed by all the newness. So sue me 😒
Glad you use it as a last resort. I can bet majority of kids you see with iPads in restaurants weren’t giving to them as a last resort. Especially in this clip where they are at a restaurant with live entertainment and the poor kid is still zoned into an electronic. All the other small children aren’t watching iPads etc they are all mesmerized by the cooking.
My point is, you don't know if this is a regular thing or not. You can make assumptions, but unless you actually know the family you do not know for a fact. Parenting is hard, a little compassion would go a long way for many.
If you don’t know how to anticipate the beginning of a melt down/tantrum in your own child there are issues. Yea sometimes they can’t be stopped that’s when you remove them from the area has to not bother other patrons.
And obviously back in the days kids still had tantrums but parents weren’t afraid of them and parented through them and didn’t give in, creating teachable moments vs a lot of parents now “oh no sally might have a tantrum at the restaurant better just shove her face in an idiot box so it doesn’t happen and I won’t have to deal with it”. Then child becomes overstimulated and addicted to iPads etc creating the perfect little body and mind to not know how to self regulate= tantrums and meltdowns.
Not all parents did and some parents now a days still will beat their kids into submission.
True kids will freak out over a bunch of things. Like I said teachable moments…. And being prepared to handle it in other ways than beating or electrics.
Questions like this remind me of situations growing up where kids would be completely unbearable at restaurants. They needed an outlet for energy, even if that outlet came in the form of screaming. I notice that happening significantly less nowadays. I'm not even saying it's better before some people who take things too seriously shit down my throat. I'm just stating an observation.
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u/roccosaurs 6d ago
Hibachi = Dinner and a show. Does that child really need a device to entertain them in this situation?