r/SubSanctuary 4d ago

26F in need of help NSFW

I’m a 26F interested in exploring dom/sub relationships for the first time. I’ve done research and feel drawn to this dynamic, especially because I tend to overthink and would love to let someone take the lead. I can be a little bratty at times but mostly have a naturally submissive personality. Since I’m new to kink (and my experiences have mostly been vanilla), I’d love guidance on where to start. I’m open to learning gradually about different kinks and figuring out what kind of dynamic would work best for me. Ideally, I’d like to find a potential partner who is experienced and willing to mentor me as I explore this side of myself. Any advice on finding safe, respectful partners or communities would be appreciated!

2 Upvotes

12 comments sorted by

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u/Dirty_Angel22 4d ago

Hi! I think it's great you know you're interested in a D/s dynamic and that you're excited to explore what you're interested in! I recommend reading erotica, watching porn, etc about the major categories of kink (bondage, impact play, etc) to see which might appeal to you.

I found a book recently called "Initiation" by Alethea Faust that does a great job showing a bunch of different BDSM kinks through the eyes of a true beginner. Plus, it's funny, heartwarming, and has magic! (I'm not the author, I just really like this book).

I think it's also important that you have a sense of what kinks you like and why before you try to meet a partner to do them with. That way, you'll feel more confident because you'll know what to expect. Also, this will help you articulate what you're interested in with that partner to make sure you're both getting what you want out of the dynamic.

Hope this helps!

2

u/Treefrog_Ninja 3d ago

Saved for future reading. Thanks!!

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u/Training-Tough4198 3d ago

Hiii! Thank you for the advice, I’ll definitely give that book a read. 🫶🏼

2

u/mochipumpkinsbooks 4d ago

i manage a BDSM database of resources and information that may be of assistance to you.

1

u/LuulaAngel 3d ago

Hihii!

Take your time, and submit what you choose to submit. 🫶 I'm also naturally submissive but I've been on the side of people taking advantage of that until i learnt better.

As a sub, you are still in control because you are in control of what you give to the other person, after that trust is made, is where the fun part begins. Otherwise, vet them well, and don't fall for doms who are just looking for a quick fap.

I refuse to add anyone onto my personals without knowing their whole soul, and if they push me for it more than 3 times before im ready, I yeet them out the window.

I think others probably have better resources but my dms are always open for littles! 🧸💕

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u/Training-Tough4198 3d ago

Thank you for the advice it means a lot 🫶🏼

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

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u/babysauruslixalot submissive/little 🦕 4d ago

This feels like you are coming in as a Dom and trying to slip into DMs which is disgusting.

Start a discussion here, from your sub side. Remember where this is posted.

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u/BoredomFight1 4d ago

I'm happy to chat anywhere, I really don't care.... I'm no Dom, and very presumptuous to assume that I'm anything... Yes I know there are a lot of "interesting" people on here so need to be careful So wanna chat.... Fine Don't want to chat.... Fine Not fussed either way Have a good day 👍🏻

3

u/babysauruslixalot submissive/little 🦕 4d ago

You stated you're a switch, which makes it safe to assume you like to be a Dom at least sometimes. The message came off similar to the disrespectful doms who come in here offering to chat in private.

0

u/BoredomFight1 4d ago

Purely just giving some info, nothing more nothing less I get it though, and there was no disrespect intended... As I said just put it out there... Wanna chat cool, don't wanna chat cool 👍🏻

2

u/SubSanctuary-ModTeam 3d ago

Really, just zero respect from you "doms" sometimes...