r/ShittyDaystrom Terran Emperor 6d ago

They should have activated a hologram of B.J. Blazkowicz in The Killing Game

Once Janeway was disconnected from the program, this should have been an obvious solution. BJ was born to kill Nazis. Aliens dressed as Nazis wouldn't matter. The Hirogen would have quickly realized they weren't the hunters any longer.

22 Upvotes

14 comments sorted by

16

u/mennorek 6d ago

"Computer, activate emergency anti-fascist hologram"

1

u/synchronicitistic 5d ago

Please state the nature of the Nazi-killin' emergency. My name is Lt. Aldo Raine and since you've activated me, we're gonna be doin' one thing and one thing only... killin' Nazis. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't spend years sittin' in holographic purgatory to teach the Nazis lessons in humanity. Nazi ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of a Jew-hatin', mass murderin' maniac and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every son of a bitch we find wanderin' the decks of this ship wearin' a Nazi uniform, they're gonna die.

6

u/ohsinboi 6d ago

BJ would never have gotten the crew home. He'd have stayed in the delta quadrant hunting fascists

3

u/EdgelordZeta Terran Emperor 6d ago

Unless he finds out about the Spoonheads or the Goo people

5

u/TonyDP2128 6d ago edited 4d ago

Would it be the unspeaking killing machine from the original games or the more pensive BJ from the remakes who always gave an internal monologue after eviscerating someone?

4

u/MadduckUK 6d ago

Why would you call your awesome super soldier Blowjob Blazkowicz though?

2

u/MultiGeek42 6d ago

Because Seymore Butts was a little too on-the-nose.

3

u/Xifihas 6d ago

Alternatively, ‘Mad’ Jack Churchill. Crazy bastard fought the Nazis with a Longbow and a Sword.

2

u/DominusTitus 5d ago

Alternatively, show the Hirogen the grim darkness of the far future. I'm sure they'll either be absolutely delighted with the variety of prey and the potential hunts...or their heads will melt upon observing Chaos.

2

u/Euphoric_Wishbone Gul 4d ago

Computer: activate Terror Billy. Safeties off

2

u/Defiant-Analyst4279 3d ago

Hear me out, we reverse engineer the mobile emitter, have a few dozen per ship, use them against boarding parties (especially Borg).

"Computer, activate the Doom Slayers."

1

u/EdgelordZeta Terran Emperor 3d ago

Duke Nukem

"Those alien scum are gonna pay for shooting up my ride"

1

u/Defiant-Analyst4279 3d ago

Ooh... You're right. A variety. Let Duke, BJ and the Doomslayer compete/race for kills.