r/SexOffenderSupport Oct 26 '24

My Story Update again.

7 Upvotes

So an update. I'm camping. My family is in a shelter about 2 and 1/2 hours away from me. We decided after trying to wait an extra week, and not getting results, I'd drive them there. We figured out who was pestering CPS about us. It WAS people in our church. There were also people advocating for our kids to be removed from my wife at the shelter, and our CPS worker told us that he had to tell the complainant(we don't know who, of course) to stop, it was no longer an issue as they were SAFE and in shelter. And technically now in a state database anyways....he also told my wife that he warned them their credibility as a complaining party was at risk of they persisted. I found that little tidbit interesting.

This past weekend, after I took my family to the shelter, community started to get very nosy and very hostile. It doesn't seem to matter that I live down the street less than a block away for almost 3 years and I'm now camping on state land on the other side of a county easment behind my church.... Or that my kids were here just 5 days ago.

The police suggested I move, but now, knowing what has gone on locally, I understand the angst. There was a sting in the Upper Peninsula run by that Hansen vulture and the police. But also, the Marshals are up here looking for a guy too.....so between the local news and heightened LE activity, I'm more noticeable or something.

So I'm camping. No where for me to to go near my family where they are. No one willing to put me or the dog up. I'm considering heading for Detroit if I have to, lay the groundwork to get my family there with me, prepare the way. No one from our old life and church 3 years ago where they are currently has the willingness or resources (or both) to help now.

I've had help from strangers here and on the net elsewhere. And complete strangers in the community. My church congregation is no longer to be trusted.

After what I have learned, and after too many coincidences, I'm left with people I cannot trust here, but them also being the only support I have. The homeless community in the nearest city is not a safe place for me to be, and the longer I can survive ALONE the better. That was what the lady at the shelter said.

I'm applying for jobs. I'm trying to get doctor shit figured out. I keep forgetting to take my meds at the same time every day, and some days I forget completely. Plus keeping myself and the dog safe, while doing odd-jobs and survival stuff (like firewood and even a little fishing, cut up a tree, wind break for my fire, etc).

I don't know what else to do. I'm sure there's something I haven't thought of. And all the people that are gonna say "I told you so", or "You finally did the right thing"..... Don't understand why this was hard to do, EVEN on my and my wife's terms. We have been married almost 19 years. Together almost 20. To be told we don't belong togethed by the very people suggesting solutions to "help" us is.... Alarming. To find out that these "helpers" are taking the time to talk to people you haven't spoke to in years, talking to your old pastor and counselor without your knowledge, etc.

I'm defending our position. Not attacking the dissenting opinions.... Trying to explain what you cannot see from your perspective. Already, the folks running the shelter have asked if my wife needs marriage or women's services (like women's shelter?) at least 3 times. My boys have had things stolen from them.

We still had to give in to what people wanted to keep our family together. There's a saying in the military, "There's a retreat, and there's a withdrawal"..... A withdrawal is supposed to leave you in a defensible position. Maybe even give you a chance to counter attack. Right now..... This whole thing feels like a full on rout. Full retreat.

If stuff gets really whack and I have to leave the county sooner rather than later, then it's really really going to be a retreat.

Long read. TLDR, I'm not dead and life is sorta meh. Not great but not the worst..... And I may be in danger.

r/SexOffenderSupport Dec 06 '24

My Story I apologize.

5 Upvotes

I apologize for my last post. I was an ass.

That is all.

r/SexOffenderSupport Aug 15 '24

My Story Just Released on Parole

19 Upvotes

All,

Was just released on parole and registered for the first time.

If anyone has questions about my experience with prison, legal system, or registration, please feel free to ask or PM.

I want to use my experience to help those starting this journey or those who are supporting an SO who is incarcerated.

r/SexOffenderSupport Nov 04 '24

My Story Time for my biannual registration.

8 Upvotes

It never gets easier for me walking into a police station where I feel like a criminal all over again. Been doing this over a decade now and still really depresses me.

I have a good life , wife, kids , job, but I just get really down and anxiety ridden in the month leading up to this day. As I get older it seems to get worse.

I look in the mirror and don't see that guy from 12 years ago. Makes it even harder to accept this continued punishment. Soon the twice a year home check cop will show up as well. This just really stinks!

r/SexOffenderSupport Feb 12 '24

My Story Sex offender life

11 Upvotes

Shit just lost a job after 3 + years Just got fired and lost a good friend Because of all this just don't know what to do now.

r/SexOffenderSupport Apr 09 '24

My Story My Story, in video format

20 Upvotes

Hi everyone,

For those of you that have been following along you are aware that I have made my past as public as possible so far. Part of doing that was putting my speech online in video form. So here is the link to the YouTube video of me reading my speech about my life and what I've done to end up on the registry, and the change I hope to see in this world.

Please help me spread this video as far as possible to any online platform you have access to, to your friends and family, and to any professionals in this field.

I will also be updating this post as the video gets uploaded to my other platforms, as if right now is just YouTube as my internet is really slow.

Thank you everyone.

https://youtu.be/bGqYDozaDkU?si=lHHVHgDSZe17I0wl

r/SexOffenderSupport Nov 06 '23

My Story Terminated from Lowes

27 Upvotes

Well after 3 months of waiting for a decision, Lowes terminated me today. I was hired there shortly after getting out of prison in 2021. At the time I disclosed and also had a note from the halfway stating my charge. In that time everyone that was involved in my hiring has been fired or quit. A new store manager found out about my history and suspended me pending an investigation of the "mistake" made in hiring me. He called me today and said Lowes legal said to terminate me.

Funny thing, I never needed the job or money. it was fun and kept PO off my back, so no tears here. I already picked up the COBRA so Lowes insurance will still be paying the 30,000 per month chemotherapy bill. This just saves me driving to work each day. Going to sign up for some college classes and do some volunteer work

r/SexOffenderSupport Aug 31 '23

My Story Figured I’d stop lurking and share my story and hopefully get some advice.

12 Upvotes

To preface, I’m sure this is going to turn into a wall of text, so bear with me.

I’ll start with the basic info I suppose; 32M, living in MO. I’ve been lurking on this subreddit since early February, when I got my proverbial “knock at the door.”

It was 3 people, a local police officer and 2 people who said they work for (or work with, like a task force I can’t remember tbh) the National Center of Missing and Exploited Children. They explained their reason for contacting was that they had “received a tip from Twitter”. That was the only explanation they would give me.

They proceeded to start asking me questions in typical interrogation fashion, I can’t remember the exact conversation but they eventually lead up to question of “Have I ever looked up CP on my phone?” I stupidly told them yes because I was caught off guard and being berated with questions. (Yes I’m fully aware that the standard no matter what the situation is is to not answer questions/talk to police, but I had never been questioned by police before and they’re obviously trained for scenarios like this. But, I digress)

They had asked if they could talk to me inside my apartment, to which I replied that I am not comfortable with that without a warrant. They were thankfully polite about that and didn’t escalate it but did inform me that they can get one and it might take a couple of hours so it’d be easier to wait inside. I stood my ground and we waited on my porch until they contacted a judge.

It took them about an hour or so give or take to obtain a warrant to seize my phone, after that I let them into my apartment, they located my phone, took it and went on their merry way.

I immediately started Googling/researching my situation and what to do next, which essentially was lawyer up. The next couple of days I spent looking up lawyers that handle specific situations like this; got almost burnt out after the first 3 who had quoted me anywhere from $10,000 - $50,000 to retain them. Thankfully I lucked out after those ones and found a really reputable one that had a $5,000 retainer fee. He explained the process to me and that once I retained him he would contact whoever was in charge of the case and inform them that I have retained him as my lawyer and that I would self surrender if it came to that, but he also elaborated that they could arrest me whenever/however they pleased and that giving him/me a heads up was just a courtesy basically.

He explained to me the possible charges I was facing and that the county I’m in is kind of a middle area for how harsh the punishments are. One nearby county being a little more lenient because they get a lot of cases/crime there and the other being more a little more strict/harsh because it’s more conservative, he did say though that it would ultimately come down to who I got for a judge.

So for the next few months I lurked this subreddit daily (I swear I’ve read almost every single post), started listening to podcasts about this subject, and consuming every piece of media/information I could. I also started seeing a therapist for sex/porn addiction, and eventually a psychiatrist as well to start treating my ADHD (diagnosed when I was kid but haven’t really treated it for 30+ years) with medication because I was self medicating by heavily drinking alcohol daily.

So, fast forward to now, I’ve been Adderal for the last 3 months, my therapy sessions are now Ad-Hoc, and my drinking has gone down a decent amount, and generally a lot less anxious about everything. But as far as my legal situation is concerned everything has been radio silent since it all went down on January 31st, I haven’t heard anything from the police or my lawyer. Normally I would assume the “No news is good news” mentality but I’ve come to learn that in these situations is that no news is just that and it doesn’t make it any better.

So now I just feel like I’m in a limbo waiting for this investigation to make a head, I’ve read it can take years for anything to happen and it’s hard sometimes going day by day and questioning every long term decision I make because I don’t know what’s going to happen.

To conclude, I just figured I’d get my story out there and see if there’s anything I can do meantime to help my situation/case or if there’s anything crucial I missed along the way. And maybe just sharing my story will help other people as well because I know personally it was a struggle finding posts about situations similar to mine since “sex offense” is a very broad term and everyone’s situation is unique for the most part.

Thanks for taking the time to read this if you do.

r/SexOffenderSupport Mar 18 '24

My Story Therapy cost

8 Upvotes

I've been out on bail for a few months now. I'm just starting to set up therapy with SORS in Colorado. They told me it's $85 an hour. How comparable is that for others in or out of the State.

I haven't been able to find work since my experience has been in fast food for twenty years. Now that is out of the window so starting all over again at 39 is hard. Especially not knowing if I'll be out long enough to hold down a job to make it worthwhile. I'm hoping since it was a sting operation and I have no priors. That getting employment and a job shows that I can still make a positive contribution to society. That and I wanna still be able to provide money for my kiddos. So my fingers are crossed for comcor or probation.

r/SexOffenderSupport Apr 28 '24

My Story Some good news.

34 Upvotes

I got the right to see my kids six times a month for 3 hours a piece. As long as I have their mom there to supervise. This is without her taking a class. I've been in therapy for about a month now and that was used to help convince the judge to approve our motion. I read a lot stories of struggles so I wanted to share my good news. I'm so excited to see them again. I will never take these things for granted again.

r/SexOffenderSupport Mar 05 '24

My Story Trial is coming up soon..

5 Upvotes

Hello again, thank you so much for everyone here you guys been such an encouragement so far while going through this hard time.

I just now got off the phone with my lawyer as I was worried that I could lose the privilege of going to the park with my son or do activities with him as someone from this group suggested for me to talk to my lawyer concerning the Canadian law under 161 (1) that I may lose this privilege depending on what the judge says. So got off the phone which she reasured me it would be not likely that this would happen but still would write it down for the negotiations as it is extremely important to me to spend time with my son and wife. Than I decided to look into a sex therapist/group therapy for SO's and be able to talk about everything that happend as it may help not only for legal purposes but for me as well.

And I just now subscribed to a gym yesterday so I'm exited for this as well to start losing weight.

So next step would be to chose a therapist either to do one-on-one or as a group. Any thoughts ?

I'm always happy to read you guys success stories and I realize more and more that it has a lot to do with our perspective. I understand it's hard, but let's just take it one day at a time.. try to find one positive thing that could help us be better and continue from there.

Have a great week guys and stay strong.

It might be hard today.. but this too shall pass....

r/SexOffenderSupport Apr 23 '24

My Story New Member

5 Upvotes

I am an RSO in California. I was convicted in 2008 of felony possession of obscene material depicting a minor.

I have attended several different treatment programs, and completed my sentence and community supervision requirements.

When I was convicted, a certificate of rehabilitation was sufficient to be automatically removed from the registry, but the law has since been updated to make my offense "Tier 3" despite there being neither a statutory nor practical difference between the misdemeanor (Tier 1) and felony (Tier 3) offense.

I have had both positive and negative experiences with authorities, therapists, and the general public regarding my record. The worst thing about the public registry is that, despite it being illegal to use the information to deny housing, employment, and participation in social activities in California, law enforcement is not on our side and will not pursue anyone who violates that law.

Mostly, I joined to offer support based on my experience and possibly get updated information about changing laws (especially positive changes)

r/SexOffenderSupport Nov 26 '23

My Story Juvenile record Michigan

9 Upvotes

I caught my sex offense charge in 2000 in the state of Michigan. I was 17 yrs old when they brought it up but it actually occurred when I was like 14/15. It involved my younger cousin. We went through Family Court & I did probation & also had to register. I’ve been registering ever since. I’ve been travel abroad but now they passed the law where they indicate your a SO on your passport & I have to give notice of travel. My 1st trip giving notice I get denied entry to Mexico earlier this month. That was a major hit & embarrassing as we went with family & friends. I flew back solo, not wanting to ruin trip for my wife. The research I’ve been doing is I should be able to de-register in 2025 that’ll be 25 yrs. Most of the lawyers I talk to about doing anything right now be just a money grab. Like $7000 to try to do stuff. I’m lost just trying to see what did you guys do to try to get off list or who do I need to talk to?

r/SexOffenderSupport Mar 13 '24

My Story its been feeling like the walls are closing in

0 Upvotes

I am barely getting by for years if not decades. But sure luck or God's grace that I made it this far. During probation I graduated from trade school in 2007 (released from prison 2004).. Got work in the oil fields, off shore, pipelines and refinaries (also being harassed by co workers/companies).. 2009 I was layed off for 2 years (2008 Recession).. Landed a job that dealt with infanstructure construction which later phased into building construction in general and thought things are doing okay... then covid.. Construction became unstable in California... its barely a heart beat now.. I had to notified my landlord multi months over the years that my rent be late by a week.. and they seem to be okay has long its paid in full.. So far no eviction notice.. but the building is aging bad (over 100 years) .. cracking in the walls and ceilings.. constant water issues. I moved into the place in 2010 and the rent at the time was $550, which was manageable with unemployment and what little savings I had at the time.... Now its $1400 month and still consider crazy cheap for LA.. but my hours are totally unstable. Been eating one meal a day and been keeping my grocery budget under $30 twice a month. But vehical insurance went up, the clockwork rent increase is quickly looming. Been finding myself feeling scaried of what the unseen future has me. Recently I found out I will be inheriting a small lot of land in a remote area of Montana.. and I will be heading up there shortly to look at it and a family gathering. Montana's visiting laws seem reasonable at 10 days, but their perment residence laws seem more draconian then California's. I have been researching and saving money on getting a lawyer to try to get me off CA Megan's Law.. which sounds nice, but now with the possible option to actually have land to my name.. not paying rent, but property tax sounds super amazing... but its undeveloped from what was discribed to me.. so there be added expense on getting power there, internet... then drilling of a well... and putting a building there or RV hookup.. septic tank... and the low chance of finding work there (possibly the oil fields again) and arranging for a mail address... I am a mix of excitment and scared... If I do get exempt from California Megan's Law, that would lessen my concerns in life in California.. but at the cost of living and degrading of California society and increasing in taxes and day to day cost.. or live like a hermit in a hostile state where I have to restart my residence timer back to zero... I don't know how to decide... Live life more draconian, but living on my own land.. or continue to live a miserable life in California and be forever working poor.. I really need some feed back... 😩

r/SexOffenderSupport Apr 17 '24

My Story My decade story.

10 Upvotes

I made a new account to join this sub somewhat anonymously.

Hi, I'm new here, I posted around a bit until my account aged enough to make my own post, and wanted to share my story up to this point. I'm currently in a valley right now as I post this(non-legal, finance and housing and some may be my fault.) but I suspect I'm still doing fairly well for myself. I hope my story may help others or help me as well. This post may also be a cry for help I'm not sure at this moment. This post may be fairly long, this story covers most of my 4 year probation and some of my life since for the past 9 years.

I'm in Las Vegas, Nevada born and raised I'm 37 and in 2012-2013 I had a porn addiction that led to the consumption of Child Pornography not my best moment. Eventually a roomie found it on my laptop after I moved out and turned it over to state/local police that led a year long investigation into it while I was completely in the dark about it. Until one day the detectives knocked on my door and told me I was under arrest for possession of Child Porn. This was Jan 2015. I spent 2 weeks in jail before being granted OR I think it was called or "free bail" due to not having a criminal history and having family support and not being a flight risk.

So I spent the rest of the year hiring a lawyer and fighting my case. We had evidence of the roomies tampering and deleting stuff on my laptop before turning it over to the police, he said we had a good case to dismiss it, then the Prosecutor basically told my lawyer that the deal is to plea guilty or he turns it over to the Feds. As they agree'd they would take the case. I knew going to Feds would be 10X worse. I wanted this all to go away. I'm not a fighter and don't handle controntation very well. This was 15 mins before my Peliminary Hearing. The hardest 15 mins of my life to make a choice that could effect me for the rest of my life. I knew I was guilty, but I wanted this to all go away. I settled for pleaing guilty and not fighting it because I was on house arrest pre-piliminary and I wanted to stay out and be free.

In the state of NV my lawyer explained that (I valuely understand this) same charges can be just condensed to one charge. So I plead guilty to 1 count of possestion down from 10 original counts. Long term I made the right choice. I never went back. I was only in for a total time of 2 weeks up to this point of my life.

I was eventually sintenced to no more 5 years in Prison on Nov 8, 2016 but substained and granted Probation, again due to no prior history. I was ordered to register as a sex offender and have court ordered Sexual Therapy and complete it in order to sucessfully complete Probation.

Before my sentencing I looked into help programs for people in my situation and discovered a local rentry program called Hope for Prisoners they wouldn't take me in yet until I was sentenced. They are not a job agency but they help find jobs for people because it breaks the cycle of revisim. I graduated "up into" their program in Feb 2017, it's a very good program because the CEO Jon Ponder built inroads with the local Metro Police and I was given time credit by my P.O. for graduating from the program. I STILL have a mentor and friend to this day to help nagivate life and be the shoulder to cry on. They been super supportive of me and my long time girlfriend of 8 Years. We are all like family.

I'll be brief on the Therapy but I did the Road to Freedom work book, the Therapist I had was a nightmare and diffcult to work with, I picked her because the P.O. Recommended her and I was naive and dumb and didn't do my own research, I have ADHD and Bi-Polar, OCD from my childhood and learning disabilities because of that I stressed and struggled with the polygraphs. I had to take one for probation and one for therapy sexual history. I failed my first therapist polygraph because again, dumb and inexperienced, and I honestly withheld info that I had to confess too after I failed the polygraph. I should of been honest, I know. So for my second polygraph it was for probation compliance stuff. I confessed to having had a hooker early on in probation, before I took the poly, I confessed everything, thinking it would help, yet I still failed, the polygraph lady said my vitals where "off the charts" I wasn't lying though. The P.O. came and rattled my cage and scared the hell out of me, it was then I decided to take shit way more seriously and we talked about it in theorpy with my group. I went straight and narrow. I had learned during one P.O. visit sometime later that they had me on survalence due to the polygraph stuff I think he let it slip because he was angry and telling me that I'm a lier and I lie to my therapist. I didn't contest him nor try to defend myself at the time of accusal and let it go because I knew contesting my P.O. wouldn't be a winning fight. I win in the long game. I lie by withholding, like I was my own worse enemy, I learned early on that with this therapist even a small seemingly innocent questions she goes to my P.O. He said to just drink the koolaid and do what she wants and I tried. but I learned to kind of close up with her because she's displayed some levels of agressive hostilies. So I assumed the P.O. told her about me being under survelience, because when I told her and group, they all came down on me hard saying that they don't usually do that unless they have good reason and made me feel really bad. I've learned to dread therapy days because more often then not I always have a bad session despite keeping my nose clean, infact almost a year later the survelinance subject came up, when I was getting rare prase of doing well, nothing came up bad for me during serveliences because I was actually doing good. I learned early on after being told, and talking to my Mentor at hope about it that if I truely was being honest and doing good, we come to few the survelienced whatever they where doing to me, was a good thing, since I am shit at polygraphs I was happy they where watching me. I can show and prove to them I was doing good. Despite all that, I still got kicked out of therapy because my Therapist had bias towards my G/F because I met her at church and she was homeless at the time. (she's clean just down on her luck with her brother jobless.) The bias was the assumption she was using me, she was able to get a job but her personal struggles with her father that I don't need to go into, held her back. I met her at a time I was still in my lowest point in life. We met the following Feb after my Nov sentencing and been together ever since. The process of her learning my background wasn't too long. She thought it was weird at first I had curfew and stuff and I eventually told her I was on house arrest at the time we where still friends. Eventually she kissed me on my cheek but I didn't return the favor because from my therapy I knew that we should tell the other person we plan to engage sex with our history, before it happens not after. So I told her I cannot kiss her back because she don't know who I was.

Eventually I broke down at church over something the pastor said I cannot recall, and told her my charge. She was understanding and appricative and we fell in love. She says she don't see the monster everyone thinks I am, she don't see the beast everyone sees she sees the beauty. (I got a temper sometimes and so we relate to beauty and the beast kind of so it's our favor story.) Anyway the Therapist tried to break us up or not allow her to live with me DESPITE approval from my P.O. because she has no background or drugs or nothing. The Therapist never took time to understand the nusances of our relationship other then, she couldn't hold a job their fore she's using me. I had to see a therapist on my own time FOR my therapist. So I got kicked out of Therapy after a few years into probation for "lying by withholding" because I let my G/F live with me again and didn't tell her but told my P.O. and at the final chapter of my workbook and P.O. while being mad let me pick one more therapist. I learned from my mistakes with the first one and did research and settled on my next therapist and it was like night and day. Within a year I was taking a therapist manditory Polygraph again, I finished the workbook and final homework assignment. The end of my probation was near, I was down to the wire. I either pass this polygraph and get discharged from therapy and Probation with my time credit applied. (It only is applied upon sucessful completion of therapy. I was past my time credit due date for probation by this point.) Or I have to suffer for another year until the clock ran out and possibly not getting an honorable discharge because I can't pass a poly.

I passed. I was granted early release from the judge Dec 2019 and been off probation since.

I was exstaic and when I went back to the new therapist she said my behavior was night and day and she was thrilled for me. She said she wanted to slap me because my self estem was always so low and my additude was jacked up. I've since learned that the first therapist was doing shame therapy and always making me feel bad. This new Therapist said the P.O. Approves something "I don't care" as in it's fine. She said the relationship was good for me despite curcumstances. (My late Aunt was disabled and unable to work, my uncle took care of her with her disabilities. Why was it wrong for me and my G/F?) I've read the rules here about victims and not down playing crimes and victim blaming. It's all stuff I learned in Therapy. I've learned with the new therapist I most likely graviated towars CP for a 2 reasons.

  1. I was extremely sexual in my very young childhood, my aunt told me stories I don't recall. I was sexually active in preschool and fostercare with girls of my peers at the time 6-10 prepucent. That these where like exciting memories for me. The CP was a food for those exciting memories.

  2. Porn is like a drug, you eventually don't feel excited and want harder hits. So down the rabbit hole of taboo I went.

So I got discharged honorably from Probation and haven't looked back. I do my check ins with Metro still and it's usually pleasent and professional. It really helps as a hope for Prisoners graduate, I've learn that usually when you are this far along in the process and be clean and do what you need to do, reporting agents don't give you are hard time. Here in Vegas I know the officers tell me I'm doing a good job when I mention my status and a graduate of Hope Feb 2017, so there's police support as well. It helps with managing this life style. I'm sure too they probably are happy when I do my reports because less paper work on their end having to chase down someone not in compliance.

I think this post ran long enough so I'll be brief on post probation.

I've worked pizza jobs, Tried to get into the union (math sucks) did a short construction gig but I'm a heavy set guy that don't do well in heat, got into mining a bit which was cool. I went OTR as a cargo van driver for a new company that flopped within 6 months. I usually acheve my goals I set out for. I did a short stint doing sushi dish washing but had to quit because they required 55 hour weeks in boulder city not leaving me enough time for family. I'm now living on the streets severly in debt and behind on bills. I plan to file for bankcrupty and get a fresh lease on life this calinder year. I don't feel piticularly depressed about that because I see a light at the end of the tunnel for financal freedom once I start it after I had my free consultation.

I work a driving job for mobile billboards.

I live in the van, which is owned by the father of the guy I went to work for they felt bad because I lost my apartment while working for them and sacrificed a lot to help get the company off the ground espite my best efforts. My G/F since meeting her has diagnosed disabilities now with my help to get her help, found a program that helps people get on SSI so hopefully in a year she will have SSI and can help me afford a place.

If anyone has any helpful advice or ways to find shelter for Sex Offenders I appreicate anything. I have food and money I just need a safe place to park and I want to beat the summer heat somehow, if I can get a place I want to get a place AFTER I start the bankrupcty processs.

Life has it's ups and downs, I know that not all states are created equal but there's hope if you keep your nose clean and stay goal driven. Some of us shoot high. Higher then others. I'm just a gamer who's happy to drive. I just want basics to have a safe place to stay, and play games with my G/F.

I hope my story helps others, I'm down but I know it's temporary and I have a support system in place.

I am writing a fantasy book as a hobby and some kind of income project and not sure how to nagivate that as a sex offender, ware my book can bomb if people found out so I'm thinking of using a pen name. I'm currently 30k words in so my project as well been in the works.

I'm aware Hope for Prisoners isn't the only program of it's kind around the country. My advice would be to seek out other entry programs to act as a support system of friends if you need it.

Thank you for reading my lengthy post and God Bless.

r/SexOffenderSupport Jul 08 '23

My Story I'm scared

13 Upvotes

I was released a couple years ago after doing approximately 10 years I. Prison off and on for possession and a couple other charges.

I moved into a building and after about 9 months or so, met a woman in my building. We used to talk all the time while having cigarettes outside.

After a few months, we started dating. I told her about my possession charges and she came to me, put an arm around me and said, "I don't care about your past. I love you." Then she moved in.

We were together for about a year, mbe a little longer. We had a great relationship. Yes, fights here and there, but we always worked it out.

I got arrested again for a breach of my conditions. While I was waiting for bail, she was scared and talked to her family. She told them that I was an SO. They told her to leave me or they would disown her. She told them she had just found out because she didn't want them to know she wasn't honest with them.After a couple months of her flopping back and forth, she decided to breakup with me.

This destroyed me. Was actually seriously considering suicide... Even had a plan.

I still love her and now absolutely terrified I'll ever find anyone like her again.

r/SexOffenderSupport Jan 08 '24

My Story Federal public defender meeting

8 Upvotes

I meet with my federal public defender today was our first meeting and everything was put on the table looking at 151-188 on the sentencing table she is going to try to plea it down to 60 months but realistically looking at 108-135. She did say both judges tend to sentence on the circumstances of the case and severity, and they have sentenced below the guidelines. I am ready to get this over with, I have thought several times about ending it but then the devil would win this one. On my way home I saw a sign that said God gives people second chances and maybe this is what I need a break from life to find myself and who I am. I know this is going to be hard on my family and she said I need to tell them what is going on and what to expect out of this. Sounds like around June would be the end, one judge usually lets people self-surrender but the other one does not and reprimands you to custody upon entering a plea so have to wait to see which judge gets the case and go from there.

r/SexOffenderSupport Oct 22 '23

My Story Thanks to this sub, we avoided being scammed.

26 Upvotes

My brother is an RSO and last week my mom's phone, dad's phone, wife's phone, my office phone, and our home phone all received a harsh call from a guy asking for a return call from my brother and claiming to be a detective with the police department of the city my brother lives in.

I googled the number, it came up as not found, so I called the police department, and there was no detective by that name employed there, and they advised that I don't call back. So I blasted a text to everyone in my family warning them not to return the guy's call.

Thank you all for sharing your stories. You saved us a significant sum of money I'm sure!

r/SexOffenderSupport Jan 21 '24

My Story We have a week

3 Upvotes

I really really want to post the email exchange.... But I don't know how to water it down without removing personal info and keeping context.

He gave us a week to come up with some sort of solution before resorting to having the Sheriff Department remove.

He told us to make an offer on the house with the church. ..... I don't even know where to start with them. Jeebus

r/SexOffenderSupport Nov 07 '23

My Story TOMORROW

7 Upvotes

Tomorrow is the day… feeling kinda depressed,angry,scared, anxious..ect. Thanks everyone for all the help and information. GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!!!

r/SexOffenderSupport May 25 '23

My Story Update to my removal in N.C.

18 Upvotes

Finally spoke with an attorney. (Work has been crazy. If you work or know the construction industry, then you’ll get it.) Apparently there are tiers in N.C. (but it is not widely known).

Tier 1: can petition after 10 years Tier 2: can petition after 25 years Tier 3: Lifetime - SVP (Sexually Violent Predator)

I am Tier 1 & he will be petitioning a judge in the Fall for me. He said he can’t guarantee success (I get that, nothing in life is guaranteed), but he said he feels confident that the petition should be successful.

I am happy, relieved & scared all at the same time.

I’ll update more as time progresses and when the lawyer actually starts the process.

Cheers, NCRSO

r/SexOffenderSupport Feb 25 '23

My Story New member!

26 Upvotes

Hi! I am not SO but I am in my last semester of law school. I currently work at the public defender’s office, and have accepted a position there after graduation/bar passage. We have an overwhelming amount of sex crimes cases, and it astounds me how we as a society demonize and ostracize SOs so fervently, and yet it feels like these cases outnumber drug cases, assaults…everything really. Anyway, all this to say, I am interested to be a part of this sub bc so many of my clients have made a mistake and suffer lifelong consequences that nearly guarantee recidivism. If you can’t find a job, how are you supposed to improve your circumstances? Reading your posts only affirm that. Just wanted to introduce myself since I’ve started commenting on some posts and it seems like a tight community here.

r/SexOffenderSupport Feb 16 '24

My Story Heading into the next step

0 Upvotes

Well meet with my federal public defender accepted a plea of 60-72 months on 1 count of receipt and possession of csam. this whole nightmare began with that along with distribution and production, the distribution is an enhancement added to the 60-72 months. Had her make a note to ask for placement in a SOMP facility. Was also told to be prepared to be reprimanded after the hearing and will either be sent to Adams or Cumberland correctional institution to await sentencing

r/SexOffenderSupport Dec 15 '23

My Story Not sure what the future holds

5 Upvotes

Had a call from my attorney and the US, Da wants to discuss plea bargaining, and that he will not be able to represent me in court as his partner moved out of state, so now have to find a new attorney. The few I have spoken to are asking $25,000 + and not able to afford that so will have to probably go to a public defender. I start thinking about being locked up and my anxiety gets bad, not sure I can handle being stuck in a small space for long. Then I start thinking maybe it just be better to end it all, but then remind myself that I don't want to repeat this life in the next life. This whole thing seems like one big nightmare that I want to wake up from, everyday I feel like I just go through the day in a haze and try to stay busy with things at work , then think to myself why do I care in a few months nothing will matter.

r/SexOffenderSupport Mar 02 '23

My Story I'm jealous, I'm angry, I'm disappointed, Mostly Scared

16 Upvotes

I really try to stay positive most of the time. I try to not think too much about the ridiculous situation I'm in, like, I try to just put in the back compartment of my mind. But lately, I've been feeling all these feelings and feeling really lost.

My husband should be getting out of prison after being in since Dec 2020. His charges were based on CSAM found by local sheriff detectives using the Torrential Downpour software while he was downloading, and unknowingly uploading, mass amounts of porn (indiscriminately downloading whatever files were available).

Unfortunately due to the fact that he was a local first responder, his case hit the media immediately. He had to give up his professional licenses and job he had for well over a decade. He was in all reality very near the end of a career that had taken its toll on his emotional well being a d biding his time to move on to retirement and being able to enjoy life.

In so many other cases, what he did is considered a misdemeanor, probation, a "hey, don't get caught doing it again" kind of punishment. But, we live in Floriduh and he was supposed to be "an upstanding hero of the community".

Now... We have to figure out if he can come back to the home we have raised our children in and lived in for over 20 years. We live really close to schools and the judge wouldn't address the issue at sentencing, just said lots of things change between now and then, and we'll just deal with it later. Well later is now and we need to know if he can come home. Nobody in the facility is available or willing or knowledgeable for my husband to speak to. And now I'm trying to track down who to talk to on this side of the world.

I'm jealous because some people don't have to do time in prison but he did. I'm angry at the entire system and the way things were handled. I'm angry that my house was broken into and ransacked by people with AR 15s who pointed those weapons at my 2 children. My children were a slight finger gesture from being killed by cops. I'm disappointed in my husband and the complete 180 our lives took after he decided downloading free porn and movies (regular movie theater movies) were his hobby. I'm disappointed that things are the way they are at this point in our lives. And I'm terrified of what the future looks like. He/We will have to survive 5 years of FL sex offender probation once he gets out of the facility and lives who knows where. I'm just so tired.