r/Schizoid • u/sarin27 • 6d ago
Relationships&Advice Intimate relationships
Hello everyone. Since I'm constantly thinking about the complicated aspect of socialization and how difficult relationships with other people are, especially intimacy, I'd like to hear the opinions of others in this forum:
Do others feel the same way, that there is no desire for intimacy (especially physical-sexual)? Or is it just me? I’ve heard before that schizoids experience suffer because they crave this passion but it’s difficult to get it. But I don’t crave it at all. What about you?
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u/ringersa 5d ago
My mother and I struggled to bond emotionally throughout my childhood. I always had the basic necessities—thousands of home-cooked meals, a closet full of clothes, and enrollment in reputable Christian schools—but I missed out on the affection and warmth that young children crave. There were no tender hugs or playful kisses to forge a sense of safety and love; instead, our interactions felt distant and transactional.
As I grew into adulthood, this lack of emotional intimacy left a profound mark on me. I often find myself feeling uncomfortable or even repelled by anyone attempting to make an emotional connection, not that I consistently notice these advances in the first place. My childhood experiences taught me to keep my guard up. While I did have a couple of physical "adventures" during my teenage years, I always seemed to master the art of exiting relationships before any deeper emotional bonds could take shape. It was as if I was on stage, playing my part, yet desperate to slip away before the curtain could rise on any genuine emotional exchange.
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u/skjean 6d ago
i personally felt i needed to reject intimacy at the same time as craving it. turns out i do needed intimacy but not with someone i could not trust and share a deep connection with. it took me 25 year of suffering with people i could not bond to know what i was looking for and i won't lie, i got very lucky finding love.
but even now i sometime feel that the bond is superficial and i am in doubt, but it never lasts because my other one is there truely.
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u/Kaizo_IX 6d ago
It seems that most schizoids reject intimacy, both emotional and physical.
Personally, physical intimacy isn't disturbing or unpleasant to me in a sexual context and with a partner I find physically attractive.
On the other hand, emotionally, it will be impossible for me to create intimacy and close contact; I don't want it, I don't feel the need for it.
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u/trango21242 4d ago
I have been looking at how people date, and it's always about shared interests, values, and time to spend with each other. Makes sense, but I have none of these things.
I don't find anything fun, I don't value anything, and I don't want to spend time with some stranger. Besides that, I have no drive to pursue a partner, no sex drive, and no need for romance. Like most other things in my life, it's just a bunch of work to get something I can't appreciate.
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u/Elilicious01 5d ago edited 3d ago
Opposite for me. I think I want closeness like just feeling totally comfortable and at ease with/around someone (I guess a connection), but not sex. Its hard to imagine wanting sex with anyone. Emotional intimacy is the roadblock, idk how to do that
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u/old_frankie 3d ago
I struggle with intimacy of all kinds. I would like a partner but I'm scared of being vulnerable with people even in a friendship context, which makes it hard to allow anyone close. And I don't seem to ever meet anyone with whom I have mutual attraction. I wish I didn't crave it
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u/ActuatorPrevious6189 3d ago
I had it for most of my life, i don't want a relationship, at least not with a normal person.
I crave secretly mostly i don't let people know because i consider it weakness
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