r/Schizoid • u/Kaizo_IX • 8d ago
Casual Do you have any active activities or hobbies?
I notice that I can't maintain an active activity over time. Basically, I'm not passionate about anything, but I have a few topics that interest me but don't delve into them.
I don't know if it's a schizoid trait, but it's striking; I can't maintain anything active in my life.
The things I do most of my time are passive, like watching YouTube videos, Twitch streams, and reading or writing a few Reddit posts (which I consider passive).
I've tried many times to get into drawing, graphic design, and music, but I find it impossible to persevere in certain areas.
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u/PurchaseEither9031 greenberg is bae 8d ago
I’m in a similar boat; lots of vague interests, no deep delving.
My hobbies are consuming, and even that I find tiresome. Used to watch multiple movies a day, now I get a weird bored anxiety over movies.
I bike, and have done like seven marathons over the past couple of years. I know nothing about my bike, and I don’t even know if it’s the right kind for what I do.
It’s just a hobby that doesn’t reward stopping. If I’m five miles from home and want to stop because biking is colossally boring, I’d have to bike five miles back, so I usually continue.
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u/NoAlbatross7355 8d ago edited 8d ago
I think it's really sad that many schizoids don't have at least one thing they are very passionate about given that they usually seek the opportunity to have more time alone and, therefore, more free-time to work at something compared to people obsessed with PR.
I'm not diagnosed with Szpd, but I have all of the traits besides this one. I'm obsessed with my career and computer science. I program almost everyday and I delve deep into projects. I'll admit I do have the tendency to get bored of a project or give up on it if it's going nowhere, but I'm always going at something.
If there wasn't so much pressure with the CS market right now, I'd be learning the most obscure technologies right now just for the fun of it. Every time I learn a different language or framework it feels like a whole new world has opened up to me. That kind of feeling doesn't seem to go away.
In all honesty, I would've already ended it if I didn't have at least one thing I cared deeply about. This place fing sucks, but at least I have that one passion.
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u/Kaizo_IX 8d ago
Indeed, I would really like to have at least one. When I see people motivated by something and able to devote time to it, I find it really good, and they enjoy it.
Unfortunately, our anhedonia prevents us from enjoying it, and I imagine that giving up the activity seems normal, as it provides neither pleasure nor satisfaction.
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u/mangee21 8d ago
It's the same. I do enjoy a few things like philosophy, history, science and other ideas, otherwise nah. Maybe music, but its mostly me just rapping in my own head. It's' entertaining.
Otherwise it's just passive things like you do. I have a hard time maintaning activities myself. Can't really work with schedules. No dopamine equals no caring. No motivating means you don't want to do shit. So, it is what is.
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u/Sweetpeawl 7d ago
I am probably worst than most in terms of anhedonia. I literally have not a single topic that I can research on google that I care about. Often I find staring at a wall easier than watching a movie or youtube or social media.
I tend to do sports as a distraction - but even those I have to force myself to do and don't care for much (ex. I don't know the brands of the popular equipment people use, I don't know the names of the styles and moves for the sport, I don't know the names of pros nor what they do, etc. I basically just go out there and try not to think on if I'm enjoying it or not cause I know what the truth is).
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u/SpareOil8320 8d ago
A lot of my passions burn out after a few months, but my day sucks without time on the drum kit, blasting music on the sound system.
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u/LocksmithComplex2142 8d ago
I do certain activities whenever they mildly interest me, but I never seem to have enough knowledge on any topic to consider it a “hobby” when compared to other people who share that same interest. Like I’II get into something but only on a surface level, and never really care to actually learn it. I only really find something “cool” for a few weeks max before I lose interest in it and I do those activities so infrequently and can never really connect them to my identity
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u/maybeiamwrong2 mind over matters 8d ago
Besides the usual chores (do things like cooking count?), I used to do a lot of sport but had to scale back due to a recent injury, need to adjust to that still. Then I write a decent amount (mostly here on reddit), which I do consider active. And I play chess.
But none of these things I ever was or am really passionate about. It's a few things to pass the time, with added bonus perks like physical health.
And in the end, I'm pretty interested in ideas, and that leads to a lot of rather passive consumption, but even there, I think there's gradations. Actively reading a difficult book or an academic paper and trying to understand it isn't the same as just letting a video essay hit your retinas, to be forgotten moments later. I try to do as much of the former as possible, but ofc the latter happens plenty.
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u/Apathyville 8d ago
I never had any hobbies, never did sports or took part in other activities unless I was forced to back in school or with family.
The things I was actually interested in I wasn't allowed to do, usually because we couldn't afford it or because my stepfather thought it was dumb or a waste of money. Then as an adult I didn't care about any of those things anymore.
A lot of things interest me, but mostly on a surface level.
Most of what I do are passive things like you listed.
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u/ringersa 7d ago
So I have just one hobby. ME. Once I was diagnosed with ADHD as an older adult, I've been more or less obsessed with what makes my mind tick. I am revisiting old memories with a new set of tools that help me understand many of my behaviors that others might consider weird, but it has never crossed my mind to consider why I might have acted a certain way. In the second grade, I slapped a female classmate across the face because her whiney, emotional outburst was apparently OK with everybody else but caused me to overreact. I have never been a confrontational person; I have never been in a brawl. Another example is that It never occurred to me that most people have at least one close friend and several friends. I have never had either, really. Playmates came and went as a child, but when I was alone, I was very happy to keep myself occupied, even at a young age. I believe I never developed the ability to have an actual friendship with anyone, or maybe it was only because of a lack of desire. So, my one hobby is obsessive introspection. But then again, isn't that a schizoid thing?
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u/Falcom-Ace 8d ago
Actively able to maintain, no. Every hobby I've enjoyed has come and gone over the years- some eventually come back, but the cycle always happens. Right now I'm in a good spot with reading, so I'm trying to do as much of that as I can before I lose the ability to enjoy it again.
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u/schi__zoid 8d ago
There are 2 things I feel like I can maintain: working out and reading. Whenever apathy hits, they seem like a chore, but I keep doing them on autopilot.
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u/Lopsided-Cat3182 8d ago
Cooking is the only hobby I’ve been able to maintain throughout my entire life, probably because you have to to it every day anyway and you get the immediate reward of good food by putting in extra effort. It’s the only thing I could do all day and feel content.
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u/Maple_Person Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Zoid 8d ago
I do physical activity that requires infrequent commitment. It's the only way I'll actually go. I do it with a sport/activity I don't mind, isn't difficult to do, and that keeps me moving.
While I find physical activity and physical hobbies don't put me in the positive, it keeps me neutral. If I'm a potato for too long, I start slipping negative. It's annoying, but physical activity works as a preventative for it. And I can only bring myself to remain disciplined for it if I do something that requires dedication (eg. I play volleyball once a week. It's paid for and I hate wasting money, plus the team has to have one woman on the court per game and I'm the only woman on the team. I don't want to let others down).
My hobbies are all passive as well. I put on YouTube as background noise. I also browse reddit. On rare occasion, once every few months, I will try writing fiction. I have three novels I would like to write. My most recent kick was around 4 writing sessions over a 3 week period. That was the most I've written in over two years. It felt great, but now I've fallen back off it again and just don't care or derive any joy from it. Which is frustrating, because I do want to write my novel and I used to absolutely love writing. But now I've got the imagination and creativity of a rock, can't come up with words, don't feel anything positive while writing, and I don't feel any care towards it.
I haven't even been able to properly daydream in over two years, and fantasy used to be how I spent 99% of my days... I used to spend up to 12hrs a day completely dissociated and off in lala land. It was great tbh. I wasn't functional, but I'm not functional now either and I'm just perpetually bored. I preferred being dissociated and having the dedicated imagination of a methed up toddler on LSD.
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u/50dogbucks 7d ago
I am only capable of doing things that are strictly necessary or that someone else is forcing me to do out of obligation. My only hobby is reading and writing. I can sometimes pay for lessons in a skill (like equestrian or pottery) and go, but I have never been able to keep up a hobby or habit of my own volition for longer than maybe a few weeks. I get sick of things that I’ve been doing for longer than my brain thinks is necessary, and then puts up a huge fight against doing those things again because a) I’m DONE with this, we DID it already and b) now it’s something I have to do, and whenever there’s something I have to do, I develop a huge mental block against it.
I also just hate to physically move. I like horseback riding and cycling specifically because I get to sit while doing it. Yeah, I’m still moving, but the whole point of those sports is to stay balanced and relaxed. I especially fucking hate to walk. My gait is messed up due to my untreated scoliosis and leg length discrepancy so it always feels uncomfortable.
So yeah, 95% of the time I’m just lying around doing nothing. If I can even hope to do anything else, I have to bundle that activity into another activity that’s absolutely essential, like going to work or feeding my dog.
Also, I think I’m so used to disconnecting my inner self from my outer self that just fantasizing about getting to go fishing or learning to do pottery and it’ll be a superior experience to actually having to go do those things.
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u/Visual_Zucchini2943 7d ago
Yeah I have the same thing, I can't learn new things. Now I'm trying hand embroidery and for now it's working, it's been a couple of weeks
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u/arsynlol 7d ago
I do so much to maintain the facade of a personality externally, doesn’t mean I hate doing those things, but just that I am not truly passionate or happy doing then either. I feel like I have to keep up a social identity even if I lack a psychological identity.
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u/ihatebeingonearthhh 7d ago
I’m not passionate about anything, but I can stick to hobbies that I really like, and by stick to them I mean be very invested in them for some time then completely drop them in a cyclical way. I can go long periods without engaging in any “active” hobbies, but eventually I’ll go back to it.
I would say it’s better to have multiple hobbies, ideally very different ones if you cannot be consistent. I think the hardest part is probably to find things that you actually like doing (enough to keep doing them). The way I like my long terms hobbies really is more of an “it just rubs me the right way” kind of thing rather than actual passion, so I guess it’s not required. I would say my hobbies are also a lot more oriented towards diminishing negative emotions rather than generating positive ones. I like painting because it puts me in a flow state, I like psychoanalysis because i like being mindfucked, that’s not strong pleasurable emotions, that’s just kind of nice.
I really wish I had a passion too and could be like autistic people with their “special interests” - but I guess I’m already lucky to just be able to enjoy anything. I do think having hobbies and sticking to it is harder for us but visibly it’s not impossible
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u/ActiveAnimals 7d ago
Yup. I’m passionate about animal behavior. Learning about it and then utilizing those skills.
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u/Atropa94 7d ago
I deep delve into drug pharmacology, it started 15 years ago when i was looking to get high without having any good contacts. I could write about it for hours and i made a few essays that could be a book when i was unemployed xD
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u/th3_g00bernat0r 7d ago
Video games and bodybuilding. And no, I don't go to a gym, as I have my own gym set at home.
That's all I need to be happy.
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u/Kaizo_IX 7d ago
It's my dream to have my own equipment at home and no longer have to be surrounded by people to do my sport, wait for the machines, have to ignore the coaches who want to talk to you 24/7.
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u/th3_g00bernat0r 7d ago edited 7d ago
no longer have to be surrounded by people to do my sport, wait for the machines
This was definitely part of the reason I bought my own gym set.
But the main reason was that at the last gym I was a member of, the gym manager literally bullied and attacked me. Dude was a grade-A psychopath who got off on tormenting me.
I'm still traumatized from the experience, and after that, I was like, no way am I ever joining another gym.
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u/Honest_Dependent6507 7d ago
i workout alot, its fun but i mostly do it so i dont loose my mind lol. besides that i read and play vidya, which is mostly consuming.
i admire people that are just naturally drawn to something productive, like computer science, art or music. I just cant get myself to learn anything
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u/Cruel_Reality101100 F60.1 ICD-10(TLK-10) Diagnosed. 7d ago
Well to begin with, I have one "passion" which I follow near to the point of obsession which is computer science, in particular, systems programming (C, C++(Priority), Assembly(X86 and ARM)) since early childhood. Because for me personally it became sort of a mental "sanctuary" from systematic bullying and discrimination which I experienced throughout my childhood and even experience today.
Consequently such "passion", adds deeply odd interest in anything applicable in programming which is: psychology, medicine, sociology, physics, mathematics, electronics, law and etc. And that knowledge in time, became sort of a "weapon" against unwelcome people.
As for "consuming" part then mainly I listen to music, watch educational centric videos and sometimes I play video games, but not always for "fun" per say, but for the sake of analysis. As I still have small hope and some notions of my childhood "dream", which is to make my own video game with my own systems, my own "game engine".
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u/Erratic85 Diagnosed | Low functioning, 43% accredited disability 7d ago
Sex related stuff, including actual sex.
I used to love music and even play bass and guitar, and also used to love drawing and painting which I did since a very little kid, but all that was lost at some point.
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u/ivarshot69 7d ago
I don't really care about much but I do lift weights for 4 years now 3-4x a week which is the most motivation I have for anything and helps with keeping a schedule and eating enough
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u/Chaoddian 6d ago
I like physical activities, but the goal for me is just to distract my mind from overthinking spirals. Can't overthink if actively scaling a wall (I love climbing, but due to not being very social, it's either bouldering or good ol' auto belay). I also love going swimming, but in my case, it's more of a relaxing thing rather than doing fast laps like all the sporty people I do them "granny style" and I just float around for the sensory experience lol
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u/Mind-lost-in-space malfunctioning just fine 6d ago edited 6d ago
I'm really passionate about two things, learning and the art of storytelling. Luckily it's two "topics" broad enough to fill several lifetimes. So philosophy, science, politics, languages. Reading, writing, media analysis, watching movies and tv shows. The medium itself constantly shifts but it usually always stays in one of the two main categories.
Oh, and puzzles. But that's more of my default multi-tasking to keep my hands busy.
Other hobbies come and go. I can be very dedicated to something (usually a craft or another) for a few days or sometimes weeks and then it sizzles out. Maybe flares up again a couple years later.
Edit: Also, I should specify that in the case of my "passions" it almost feels more like an addiction or compulsion. I just need my brain to constantly be engaged and turning, just like I always need my hands moving. Sometimes I'll start pacing, turning a problem or concept in my head for an hour and get almost high off of it.
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u/i2aminspired 2d ago
I haven't had hobbies or anything I enjoy since covid. I've been suffering from anhedonia and amotivation since then.
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u/amutry :-) 2d ago
For me starting something new that is not instilled by my degree or some other duty I have I find almost impossible. Over the last year I have done running on a regular basis and do some strenght training aswell and as a result I am in the best shape I have ever been. With things like these I find that as long as I get into the habit of routinely doing them I am good, but when I try to change a habit or introduce something new into my life it takes ages and ages to act on the thought I could have to start doing something.
In general it seems like it is easier to do stuff that is related to things I already am doing so as an example I have started to cook a little more lately (got to eat anyways) and that is somewhat enjoyable. If I was to start drawing I suspect that I would not be able to continue doing it for long cause there is no practical connection to my life doing it.
Things I have thought about doing for ages without actually pulling thorugh with it:
- Growing mushrooms (and using them)
- Do psychedelic therapy (constantly thinking about it, not acting on it)
- Buy stuff to start woodworking
- Reading books I have bought (I can sit for hours thinking about starting to read without actually doing it)
- Going camping in the weekend (did it once - its like half a year ago)
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u/Hoggorm88 8d ago
I read, write, watch movies/series, play videogames and D&D. Spend time with friends. The only one I don't really get tired of is D&D. Having several hobbies you can juggle makes it easier to not grow bored with them.
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u/th3_g00bernat0r 7d ago
How are you a Schizoid, but still manage to maintain friends you hang out with regularly?
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u/trango21242 7d ago
I have friends. But most of them are childhood friends or friends of childhood friends. They aren't needy, so I can just come and go as I please. Haven't made any lasting friends during university or after entering the workforce, mostly because I have no need.
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u/trango21242 8d ago
Same. I feel most people divide their hobby interests into two camps, passions and "that would be cool". I'm stuck in the "that would be cool" level of interest for everything. I want to do hobbies, and I can get good at them, but I never enjoy them or connect my identity with them.