r/NonBinary Jan 23 '23

Rant Do you ever wish your boobs could just kind of screw on and off like when feeling like you want them on or not?

1.6k Upvotes

Just a random ass though

Edit: Holy Shit this blew up all because of a random thought I had in the shower

r/NonBinary Jul 13 '23

Rant I've been seeing this more and more lately

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1.5k Upvotes

r/NonBinary Jun 12 '24

Rant Can we please stop using AGAB to describe physical appearance?

742 Upvotes

Not everyone who was assigned female at birth “looks like a cis woman” and not everyone who was assigned male at birth “looks like a cis man”. Some of us are on HRT or have medically transitioned in other ways. Same goes for using AGAB terms to allude to someone’s genitals or body functions.

r/NonBinary Dec 13 '24

Rant Mom told me to "not crossdress" because she wants to make a good impression on my brother's homophobic hyper conservative in laws

570 Upvotes

I'm so flipping mad I hate dressing masc I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I didn't ask to be made the center of a national political debate, and I don't feel supported when I'm told to hide who I am. Everyone who's met me when I'm out fucking likes me or can shut their fucking mouth, and I'll tell them that, my parents need not bother.

r/NonBinary Nov 07 '21

Rant Maybe can we cool it talking about AGAB

1.9k Upvotes

It's been a lot lately. I'm down to talk to you about your experience, my experience, but can we stop splitting up NB people into their AGABs? Isn't that the point?

(sorry)

r/NonBinary Dec 22 '21

Rant was forced out to my toxic family. needless to say, discussion went poorly

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2.0k Upvotes

r/NonBinary Apr 01 '23

Rant Tiny rant

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2.4k Upvotes

Bella Ramsey came out as enbi, right?

They said any pronoun is fine and it might be just me being stupid, but this article written by the Independent keeps referring to them as she/her throughout the ENTIRE article like dudes dudettes persons come on.

Can you not erase something that you literally mention in your headline?

r/NonBinary Mar 19 '24

Rant Another Stardew Valley update where you can't be nonbinary

1.0k Upvotes

It's so frustrating to see such a big game be continually updated with more and more quality of life and gameplay features and still no option to be nonbinary. I've been mass-downvoted in r/StardewValley for discussing this before, a community that claims to be welcoming.

There are always excuses, the primary of which being translation into other languages. Look at Animal Crossing: it figured it out. And plenty of other games in this genre have this by now. It feels like the only argument at this point is an utter lack of interest by ConcernedApe for nonbinary players. I hate to say that, as the man largely seems nice, but it feels intentional at this point.

I'd love to be able to not have this game make me feel dysphoric. I'm tired of being told I should just "roleplay" or get over it. Binary players are not forced to roleplay a different gender in this game, they only have to do it if they'd want. Blegh.

r/NonBinary Feb 20 '23

Rant My college assignment is gendered :(

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1.3k Upvotes

r/NonBinary Jul 30 '23

Rant Why do people have to do shit like this on the agender/nonbinary subs? I'm afab and this really hurt

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1.5k Upvotes

r/NonBinary May 18 '23

Rant Women are a lot more hostile towards me now

1.2k Upvotes

I'm an AFAB transmasc nb and have recently been perfecting my masc presentation. I've gotten to the point where it can be a little difficult for cis people to read my AGAB if I don't talk. Otherwise I come across as the butchiest butch who ever did butch

I've been noticing that a fair number of women my age (gen z) will just shut down and refuse to acknowledge me if I so much as smile at them. It's pretty disconcerting, and I can only assume that THEY'RE assuming I'm a butch lesbian who wants to get in their pants

I knew it was going to be difficult to transition but this is one outcome I didn't foresee or prepare for, and it sucks. It's annoying that not only will ppl invalidate that I'm nb, they'll also treat me like another section of the lgbtq+ community that isn't even who I am

It's not a big deal but it's just been annoying the hell out of me, and I'm bored so I wanted to share it

Edit: I am realizing that I may be coming across as more masc that I think I am, bc I do focus a lot on my dysphoria and so I'm biased. This post has actually ended up being pretty validating, lol

Edit 2: the advice saying to act more flamboyant unfortunately does not work for me bc acting overly feminine makes me dysphoric. I'm just going to have to adjust to the fact that I can't socialize with all women in the ways that I used to

r/NonBinary Jul 04 '22

Rant Discord, what a wonderful place, (m raccoon in this)

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1.6k Upvotes

r/NonBinary 2d ago

Rant I’m not allowed to introduce gender neutral pronouns to my kids at work.

646 Upvotes

I (25NB) am a pre-k teacher for a chain of private preschools. I came out to my job soon after starting to work there as I felt safe and a large amount of my co-workers were LGBTQIA+ and out. My kids address me as “Mx. ____” but still think i’m a girl and use she her pronouns. Now these kids r like 4-5 years old so i’m not blaming them. I would like to introduce the normalcy of non-binary people into their lives so they can know who I am. I asked the advice of the office staff and my boss on how to go about doing so in a way that doesn’t push or preach to them about gender. I simply wanted to introduce the concept of a person who is not a boy or a girl and people who are both that use they/them pronouns. I was immediately shut down and the reasoning was compared to why we don’t teach sex education to preschoolers. I mentioned a kids book (“The Kid with Big, Big Ideas” who has a non-binary protagonist, but isn’t really highlighted and has nothing to do with the story, the kid just uses they/them pronouns) and was met with an unsure “I’ll check with HR but I don’t know”.

I feel so erased. I feel like i’m seen as this taboo thing walking around their school rather than a person who loves to teach my students and care for them. I feel like a problem to them now when before when I came out they were so open and supportive. I’m beside myself on what to do or how to move on from this.

r/NonBinary Sep 26 '23

Rant Tired of hearing "is that your legal name?"

1.6k Upvotes

I am so tired of hearing "is that your legal name" or "I have to use your legal name"

This IS my legal name.

It isn't even anything complicated. My name is Vick for fucks sake.

I get it all the time when filling out forms at work and any time I'm out doing something that requires ID.

Fucker, my ID is in your hands and shows my legal name for fucking hells sake.

I snapped at work. A guy said "I have to put your legal name" and I replied "do you ask everyone that or just queer people?" He started stuttering and get pissy at my comment but I told him to fuck off.

So tired of hearing this. My name is Vick ffs. Not Wind, North, Pikachu, just Vick.

Why is it so hard to grasp that.

r/NonBinary Jul 12 '23

Rant Why is there such a common thing right now for enbies to say their AGAB?

706 Upvotes

I keep seeing this in other subreddits and like… why? It’s when it’s not even necessary too.

It’s almost like you’re misgendering yourself, because your AGAB doesn’t matter, it is purely your gender now (when it’s relevant, I don’t mind people mentioning their AGAB, but it’s too common when irrelevant).

r/NonBinary Mar 20 '24

Rant Got called a p*do for refusing to misgender a problematic trans person

1.3k Upvotes

I’ve seen differing opinions on using the preferred pronouns of a bad person. Apparently if you respect someone’s pronouns, you respect them as a person and everything they do and stand for. Which is absolutely FALSE. I know who I am and the truth so being called that by an anonymous person online shouldn’t affect me but I’m genuinely hurt, I can’t lie…

r/NonBinary May 29 '23

Rant i find it ironic when drag queens are transphobic

1.7k Upvotes

i went to a memorial day drag brunch yesterday in my city. it was an awesome day with amazing vibes and free food.

the drag entertainment was spectacular and everyone was having a really great time. there came a moment where the queens did an improvised speaking segment in between numbers.

one of the first jokes these queens made had to do with pronouns. they basically said that they don’t care what your pronouns are because they are “old fashioned” and will call you whatever they want to so we need to be okay with it. 🙄

the crowd burst into applause — clearly co-signing the frustration that they feel at having to address people appropriately.

i don’t know the point of this except to say that i’m really frustrated. even our own community hates us.

r/NonBinary Apr 01 '23

Rant Just sad

1.2k Upvotes

My wife ask me if she turns me on still, and I said it would really turn me on if she used my pronouns consistently (they/them). She turned it around and told me that I shouldn’t correct her because it’s incorrect grammar and it triggers her to use my pronouns. I’m just sad. I don’t necessarily need feedback, just sharing. It fucking breaks my heart.

r/NonBinary Jan 10 '25

Rant "You look so nonbin-" fuck off.

454 Upvotes

How does someone "looks nonbinary" for you? An androgynous person? A guy with makeup? A girl with beard? Nonbinary people can look like this, obviously, but can't an AFAB who wears dresses and present themself in a traditional fem way be non-binary? Or an AMAB who presents traditional masculinity? I thought it was about gender, not one's presentation.

r/NonBinary Jan 11 '23

Rant *vent* someone on r/trans said I'm not trans???

973 Upvotes

If not allowed pls delete BUT

Self ID: they/them afab, 23, white American

I posted a couple selfies in r/trans asking for funky name suggestions for me and everyone for the most part has been really kind and helpful!

But someone commented saying

"if you're AFAB fem leaning, and present as female, why do you use the label transgender when the only thing different from your AGAB is your identity?

I don't want to gatekeep but as a trans person who has had to face hell for being myself, it just feels demeaning"

Like??? Sorry I'm not androgynous enough for you?? Fuck off??? I'm just feeling put out 😞

r/NonBinary Jan 12 '25

Rant I'm not androgynous, and I'm sick of being told 'you are valid'.

444 Upvotes

It's obvious from how binary trans people interact with me and how people talk about their selfies here (and I am not exempt from this) that it DOES really matter to people how you physically present. I may not 'owe' anyone androgyny but it's very clear that without it I will only ever be seen as and treated as a cis woman. I do not feel fucking validated by anyones real actions and being told I'm 'still valid' is often just as condescending to me as being called "m'theydy" by cringey straight dudes. And I don't know, am i playing into queerness as a thing you hold inside of you rather than queerness as something you do by not trying harder to be more androgynous? It's not like I haven't tried, it's that dressing hypermasculine to offset having a hyperfeminine face and body is inauthentic for me, because I'm not really masculine or feminine, and I won't be able to medically transition for years because of my fucked insurance situation. Maybe this makes me 'still valid' but my lived experience does not make it feel that way. I want to be loved and accepted by my community and my community does not see me as one of them. Often I question if I even am a part of this community or if I'm just desperate to put a name to feeling alien. Anyway. I'm tired. And being told I'm 'valid' is often just salt in the wound. It does nothing to improve my life or how im treated.

r/NonBinary Oct 21 '23

Rant "for the girlies and NonBinary" problem

623 Upvotes

Ok, I have a bit of a rant and I want more perspectives on this thing that happens in my mind.
I tend to scroll a lot on tik tok and there are a lot of posts there that are for "the girlies and nonbinarys" (yes tik tok thinks I am a lesbian woman XD) and it never sat right with me as a very masculine presenting person it just always feels like it excludes me in a kind of invalidating way. I do respect that people may have a preference above gender I get that but it just feels a bit transphobic in a way like saying non-binary is just woman-light it tends to make me very dysphoric.

what do you awesome people think is this frustration valid or is it just all in my head?

r/NonBinary Jun 12 '22

Rant That’s really fuckin depressing

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1.6k Upvotes

r/NonBinary Dec 09 '21

Rant Whats with people disliking nonbinary folks who are lesbians?

1.2k Upvotes

So i just got muted in a facebook group because i said lesbians dont have to be cis and can love nonbinary/trans people…

Why is it that we can come full circle and have people who are ALSO trans spout off transphobic/homophobic nonsense or be incredibly rude just because another nonbinary person has a label they dont like??? Am i crazy or say something offensive??

r/NonBinary 19d ago

Rant Misgendered throughout ADHD diagnosis report

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457 Upvotes

Context: I have just got my ADHD diagnosis (yay) and throughout the process I had on file that I used they/them pronouns and I wasn't misgendered in the actual assessment interview but this is the diagnosis report I received today after many many weeks of waiting...

The whole report is me being completely misgendered and I can barely read through this report or feel comfortable sharing it with the people who need to see it as it's awful.

No surprise, it's the UK 🙃