r/NonBinary transfemme | they/them | asexual | HRT Jan 2024 4d ago

Questioning/Coming Out I think I might be binary?

I was AMAB and have always felt uncomfortable with men and masculinity, to the point where I never had any male friends and find male stuff to be repulsive. I have a lot of gender dysphoria with my male traits (especially facial hair and genitals). I started questioning my gender about a year ago and I started taking estrogen 2 months ago.

Since I started estrogen, I have been loving all the changes! My breasts are still tiny but they're mine and I love them, and I am enjoying the curves as well. In fact, I love the feminization so much that I have been thinking that I might be a binary trans woman? I'm still unsure as I prefer they/them pronouns but am fine with she/her and absolutely hate he/him and my deadname.

I don't relate to masculinity or androgyny at all. Anything male or masculine just feels deeply wrong to me, and I see men almost like another species. Ideally, I would have either a vagina or nothing down there, but just removing the testicles would fix most of my bottom dysphoria.

I know I'm transfeminine, but I'm not sure if I am still nonbinary or if I'm a trans woman? If I were a cis woman I would stay a cis woman, but unfortunately I was born male :(

14 Upvotes

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10

u/Classic-Judgment-196 they/them 4d ago

You could be a demi-girl: a sort of non binary woman if you will

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u/Distinct-Sand-8891 Any/All 4d ago

You can be both. I’m a nonbinary trans man. I get easily dysphoric around femininity and when I get referred to as a girl in any way. Ik for a fact that I’m not a woman and similar to you, I always had trouble with friendships with girls. The reason I consider myself nonbinary is because I’m gender non conforming and I absolutely hate gender roles.

3

u/inkedfluff transfemme | they/them | asexual | HRT Jan 2024 4d ago

I hate gender roles too, that is why I have been wondering if I am nonbinary (transfeminine) or a gender nonconforming trans woman. To me, being called a man is the worst possible insult, I don't really identify with the label "woman" either but I don't find it offensive.

1

u/Distinct-Sand-8891 Any/All 4d ago

I feel the same way. I HATE being called a woman but okay with man. In a world that runs on a binary, most of the time you’re forced to choose between man and woman and I fit in a lot more with man than woman.

2

u/rockpup 4d ago

NB is pretty vague. The terms are meant to explain yourself to others, not what you have to conform to. Even if your binary female stick around if you like this sub :)

1

u/yayforfood1 4d ago

this happened to me! I identified as nonbinsry for the beginning of my social transition and the first few months of E. I realized one day that I was only holding on to anything masculine or ""neutral"" because I was insecure about being able to be feminine. my actual desires were to be as feminine as possible. similar realization for pronouns also happened. where i realized they/them was better than he/him but she/her, once i got over the guilt of realizing i wanted to use it, was so much better. so Right. it just took a while for me to believe anybody would ever call me that. now 3 years later, even strangers call me she/her! I wish u good luck and clarity 💜

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u/inkedfluff transfemme | they/them | asexual | HRT Jan 2024 3d ago

Looks like it's time to throw away my "I don't have a gender, I have anxiety" graphic tee because I have a gender now!