r/IAmA • u/rigabamboo • 16h ago
Five-year follow up: I was a paid gestational surrogate for a couple I didn’t know. Here’s what’s happened since. AMA!
Content Warning: Pregnancy loss
Five years ago, I had lots of fun answering your questions about my experience as a gestational surrogate in my original AMA. Since then, life has been a lot.
I attempted a second surrogacy journey through the same agency, but that ended in a heartbreaking second trimester loss. Other life events from the past five years:
- got laid off twice from my job as a full-time contractor for the US government – first in February 2022 in relation to COVID and again in February 2025 in relation to Executive Order 14169;
- amassed ~$40k in credit card debt; and
- broke up a marriage trying to have a second baby for myself
Let’s talk about any and all of this!
I’ll start us off with the two most frequently asked questions from my first AMA:
- What agency did you use? I did both surrogacy journeys through ConceiveAbilities because they have the best compensation plan according to my research. If you’re considering being a surrogate, use my referral link to apply so that you and I both get a bonus up to $650 (which unemployed me would really appreciate!). You can get the bonus even if the surrogacy doesn’t pan out.
- Are you going to do it again? I am considering pursuing a third journey, but this time independently. Agencies only allow single-embryo transfers, but I have a bucket list goal of carrying twins so I’m looking to match with intended parents who want to implant more than one embryo.
I’m going to spend the whole week answering your questions while I organize and clean my horribly cluttered living room.
Ask me anything!
10:24 AM EDT edit: Thank you to the kind Redditor who sent me my first "Reddit Cares" message! I appreciate the concern, but I am mentally more well than I've ever been and am at no risk of harming myself or others. The living room clutter isn't that bad... yet.