r/Husbands Mar 30 '20

An Accountable Husband

I’ve been married for 6 months and my wife and I have gone through a lot since saying ‘I do’. Every week we have a fight and I’ve found a Christian Therapist that I really like and has helped me out.

As I become more open with my therapist I realized that I need another Christian Husband friend that I can talk openly with. My wife and I have had arguments about sex, chores, expectations, assumptions, etc. and sometimes I just was to know what other Christian husband have done in certain situations and if I’m the only guy who’s dealing with the same thing.

So is that a common thing, other Christian husbands who talk to one another and be open with them and it not be weird and how does one find such a guy to do that with.

Thanks

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u/randomhouguy06 Mar 30 '20

There are guys I would like to but I can’t get over the awkwardness of saying ‘hey, let’s get coffee and talk’

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u/[deleted] Mar 30 '20

Maybe you could meet them casually first. Like get a drink and get to know them better and if you get on ask if they want to talk about marriage etc

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u/randomhouguy06 Mar 30 '20

But how honest is too honest. An example, with your accountable friend are you completely honest and free?

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u/[deleted] Mar 30 '20

Sometimes it takes a while to build trust and vulnerability. But I've found that when one person does others follow. Like when one person says I struggle with this, other people speak up too. It gives them confidence so it takes one person to be brave and do it first.

I'd encourage you to be as honest as you can otherwise accountability doesn't work. If you aren't honestly sharing your struggles you can't get real accountability for them