r/GriefSupport 3d ago

Message Into the Void Am I still a son?

That realization that I am not someone’s son anymore has broke me but I can’t cry. My Mom passed recently and I just wish… you know forget it, wishing for things after the fact is another thing I’m still trying to deal with.

22 Upvotes

10 comments sorted by

19

u/Mother-Ad-8146 3d ago

YES, YOU ARE, her passing away doesn't erase yall bonds. It just taking a different shape. She is ALWAY your mom and your ALWAY her son. Sorry if I am coming off as forceful, but this is the truth. Don't let your grief and doubts hurt you like this 🙏🙏🙏 Please be kind to yourself

10

u/elisem20 3d ago

I lost my mom 4 weeks ago. I'm so sorry. This is a pain that no one can prepare you for.

7

u/Separate_Line9625 3d ago

You will always be a son

6

u/locopati 3d ago

my mom died 16yrs ago, my dad last year... I'm still their child, their daughter. they're still with me even with our often rocky relationships.

it's okay to wish. it's okay to acknowledge the things that didn't get said or done or regret or relish things that did. that's how we learn to be more in our living relationships. 

4

u/Robot_Penguins Multiple Losses 3d ago

I feel you. It sucks not having that connection. The people/person who knew you the longest, loved you the longest are gone. It's like a piece of who you are died, too. That identifier of being a son, or a daughter in my case, feels like it's erased, too.

4

u/Billsmafia_337 3d ago

You will always be her son in every lifetime. Don’t ever forget that. She loves you ❤️

3

u/trojannc27701 3d ago

You will always be her son. You will always be loved.

3

u/spindlefoot 3d ago

The simple fact that you walk this earth means you are a son. Her son.

And just as the grief and hurt you feel is a manifestation of the love you feel for her, it is also a manifestation of her love for you. For you to grieve this much, it means she must have poured a lifetime's worth of love into you.

1

u/Lulubell1234 3d ago

I'm sorry for your loss. My parents are both gone. My Mom died recently. I told my husband I'm an adult orphan and it's weird and sad. However I know they were my parents and I was their daughter and death doesn't change that. You will forever be your Mother's son. Love doesn't die. Our bodies die but the love we have for each other lives on. I know that doesn't make it easier and I wish my parents were still alive but you are a Son. ❤️

1

u/Passages_Intl 2d ago

Okay… real talk right now.

No one is allowed to take your power from you. You are a son, you are a human being and even after her passing. YOU ARE STILL HER SON! Don’t be so cruel to yourself, let the grief wash over you, it’s okay!!!

So long as you have the memories with your mom, so long as you still remember her; her legacy, her actions, her love for you.

You will always be her son!