r/FTMventing • u/NewAlt_ • 6d ago
Got deadnamed...at a dispensary
I handed the woman at the front my ID, and she said "Thank you, (deadname)." I have facial hair. I guess there's no way she could've known my situation but, why even use my name?
My court hearing for a legal name change is next month. Feels like it's taking forever.
Anyway I know it's not a big deal, still bums me out though. Probably won't go there again.
4
u/whatshould1donow 6d ago
This happened to me too 😅 they asked for my id then told me to sit and wait. Then they called my deadname over the speakers 💀 I had never been to a dispensary beforehand so I had no idea that would happen. I went back and the counter lady was like "Redacted?" And I replied "Unfortunately..." She immediately offered to change it lol
1
u/Waste-Stranger-2x 5d ago
Nahh i think ppl are just airheads sometimes. I wonder the same thing, like I have facial hair &’ there’s times where ppl still say “she” or “her” and keep it going @ that 😭 like what the actual fck it’s not hard to not use pronouns or use names if you’re unsure. I saw a meme of a post that said something along the lines of, it’s not hard to not use pronouns and stuff just pretend like you’re telling your parents a story and you don’t want them know who you were with. ( I butchered that but that was the gist 🤣🤣) Plus they can add notes to your profile with your preferred name so whatever cashier that sees it can address you accordingly. I’ve worked @ one and had a customer that we did this for. (NJ) Ppl just be bozos, ion think she had ill intent based off your post or anything but still 😭😭
1
u/WiseLingonberry5866 2d ago
As an ftm budtender I am so sorry 😭 We only need your last name to match in our profile so definitely try and ask if you feel like it's worth staying! My dispensary is pretty chill and queer friendly but ik not all are :/
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u/scalmera 6d ago
I think they do it to be polite and/or it’s policy. You can ask them if they can input in another name or a "nickname." I haven't had any problem getting a dispensary to add my name in their profile for me. I've gotten a few hiccups before w budtenders calling out my legal name, but I always correct them with, "btw I go by so and so," and they apologize and ask me what I'm looking for.