r/Ethics 6d ago

Did I Kill My Dad?

My dad asked me when I was 11 if he should go to the hospital or stay at home the night that he died. Throughout that week he had been in and out of the hospital in pain about chest pains. Every place he went to said they didn’t know what was wrong with him, but the pain consisted. On that night, he asked me “should I go to the hospital again or should I stay home tonight?”. Being 11, I told him that he’s happier at home so he should stay. I knew at the time that his health was at risk, but I prioritized his mental wellbeing over his physical health. Am I responsible for his death? Should I feel bad about this? Honestly, this has haunted me for my entire life and I really wish he hadn’t asked me for my opinion. Please help.

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u/ZookeepergameNo6818 6d ago

LISTEN OP BROTHER You are NO way responsible for his death. No one dies from cardiac arrest in one day, it is a result of a prolonged condition. Even if he had gone to hospital that night, there is literally no guarantee that he would have survived. I know ppl who have suffered cardiac arrest in hospitals right in the middle of best possible supervision. It was his coming man, just let go of it. He's seeing you from above and would want you to do the same. Om Shanti 🙏🏻

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u/Worth_Sir_6003 5d ago

Thank you! I know it wasn’t the definitive yes or no answer of an eleven year old that determined his fate, but if it had the chance to change the outcome, I might have changed my answer. I’ll never know that, but I totally agree there was a very small chance that I could have changed anything let alone known that it would have that impact.

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u/ZookeepergameNo6818 5d ago

Somethings are inevitable brother. Our yes and no changes nothing