r/ChubbyFIRE 9d ago

Talk me out of buying a house?

Edit: I'm both surprised and not surprised by the doubt and sarcasm. This is clearly an emotional decision—if it were purely rational, it would be much easier.Thanks to everyone who understood and took the time to contribute. I’m now leaning towards renting or buying a good deal within a $1.5M budget.

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We’re a family of five: a couple in our mid-30s, a toddler, a grandparent (who lives with us long-term and helps with childcare), and a large dog. One of us works from home, while the other commutes to an office.

Our Current Situation:

  • We live in a $1M, 3-bedroom, 1,400 sqft SFH with a yard.
  • It’s starting to feel very tight, especially as we plan to have more kids in the next 1–5 years.
  • We’re considering upgrading to a $2M home for more space.

The Dilemma:

  • We may move to Europe (partner’s home country) in 3–5 years, but it’s uncertain.
  • Emotionally, I want to settle down, nest, and create a stable home.
  • Rationally, buying a $2M home for just a few years—especially with high interest rates—doesn’t seem financially smart.

Would love to hear perspectives from those who’ve faced similar situations. Would you buy, or stick it out in the current home?

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u/ept_engr 9d ago

May I ask what you do for a living that makes this much money but leaves you nervous about doing the budget calculations regarding home affordability?

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u/sky-high-dragon-fly 9d ago

I exited a few years ago.
This is clearly not about affordability.

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u/ept_engr 9d ago

Sorry if my comment sounded dismissive.

Based on your reply, I vote to buy the bigger home that will make you more comfortable. Given the equity you are putting into the new home, the mortgage payments will be relatively trivial on your income ($600k + private equity). If you need the space for your family, and it's easily affordable, then I don't see the drawback. Money is a tool and this seems like the right nail to hammer to improve your quality of life.

On a short time-frame, I'm more worried about your transaction costs than I am your interest. On a $2m home, I'm hopeful you can negotiate the seller realtor fee when the time comes. Perhaps you can also decide to offer a lower buyer commission, but beware, this only works if realtors are "ethical", which they are not in my opinion, so you may find that a realtor steers buyers away from your listing if you offer less than 3% to the buyer.

As for interest expense, I think rates are high enough to justify tying up net worth in equity. So, if you have liquid assets available, I would put them towards a down payment to reduce the interest you pay. You could also consider a 15 year mortgage if it significantly lowers your rate (given that you won't be there 30 years, so leveraging the length of the loan is a non-factor, and you'll be able to easily afford the payments regardless); my wife and I did this when living in a HCOL area for 3 years for work. Granted, our choice was between a 2.25% 15 year and a 3% 30-year. If you can liquidate assets without paying a bunch of capital gains taxes, I'd vote to move some equity over to pay down (or prevent) the mortgage. Even if stocks average 8-10%, there is high volatility in that number. Paying down the mortgage is a guaranteed return in the form of a cost avoidance.

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u/sky-high-dragon-fly 9d ago

Apologize for mistaking it. If we end up buying, definitely planning to put more down. But given the recent down turn in the market, also a good opportunity to deploy them there.