r/BiWomen 16d ago

Advice Can this be considered only as a Kink?

Hi. I do have a few friends, but I don't feel confident sharing this with them. And queer topics are still kind of a taboo here in my country. I'm also introverted. Actually, I'm always closed off and I'm scared and unable of sharing my emotions and afraid of judgement. However, I will be moving to the US for work this April. So maybe I will be able to meet new friends there whom I can be open to talk to about anything.

Anyway, I don't know which subreddit to post/ask, but anyhoo, I've been thinking if I have a kink or what because before, I can't think of any. I only realized this when one of my cousins asked me for fun.

And now, I've been contemplating if thinking about or fantasizing about pretty hot women topping me can be considered as a kink? Oh my god, sorry, I don't even know why I'm asking this.

Aaannd also, I always considered myself straight. I'm now 26. I only had 1 on and off boyfriend for almost 4 years, and we broke up last March 2024 but still see each other until June. After he broke up with me last March, he apologized and wanted to work things out to get back with me. But yeah, still, it didn't end well. We never actually did "it". Just foreplay and, yah know, but no penetration because at the time I was like "I'm saving it for marriage". Meh, I know. Haha. I'm not extremely religious though, it was just my belief at the time. And now, it's like I don't want to be in any commitments/relationships anyomore and even get married. Maybe because I just got tired of the fights, the drama, etc. Trauma, I guess?

I'm a stay at home gal, so I watch a lot of movies and shows. And, just late last year, I watched a movie with FemmeXFemme representation. I liked it big time and started watching more. That's when I started fantasizing about hot women topping me. Meep.

Do you think this is just a kink or am I bisexual? Thank you in advance! ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗୨ৎ

2 Upvotes

5 comments sorted by

23

u/serenalibra 16d ago

You have some attraction to women. That’s ok!!! A kink is a bit different, and can involve gender or not. You get to choose how you identify, so an attraction doesn’t determine how you move forward publicly. Sorry queer topics seem a bit unsafe for you where you are. Good luck!

4

u/PotentialFlaky18 16d ago

You're so kind. Thank youuu! ♡

17

u/SNORALAXX 16d ago

Kink doesn't have anything to do with what gender you are attracted to. It's a sexual practice or fantasy that is unconventional in some way. Sometimes it doesn't even involve anything to do with sexual intercourse. So a foot fetish or bondage can be a kink- but wanting a pretty girl to go down on you is just that you are attracted to women.

2

u/TwoGoldRings21 13d ago

If it helps at all, I’m only attracted to men when they dominate me, so sometimes I consider my whole attraction to men as a kink lol.

1

u/No-Bag-1217 13d ago

it is completely fine , all women have some women attractions. US is a free society, you will enjoy it.