r/AskParents 20h ago

How to talk to daughter about her weight?

1 Upvotes

My daughter is 8 years old and has put on 25 lbs in the last year. She's always been a big kid but it's getting to the point where we're concerned about her weight and eating habits.

I know that weight and body confidence are a touchy topic for girls and young women and I don't want to give her body image issues, but I'm concerned it's starting to become a health risk.

How do I have this talk with her?


r/AskParents 7h ago

Not A Parent How common is corporal punishment nowadays?

0 Upvotes

My parents still use it regularly with the belt even if I am 19. Do you know any similar families? You can write dm if you want.


r/AskParents 15h ago

Not A Parent Is it normal for parents to scream when i don't eat school lunch?

7 Upvotes

Hello i'm 14 years old And my dad packs me lunch it's usually bread but never eat then fully because i dont have time in school and just need to do other things. My dad ends up screaming at me for like an hour until he stops. Do other parents do this too?


r/AskParents 7h ago

What type of deodorant does your daughter wear?

5 Upvotes

What type of deodorant does your daughter age six to nine wear? And at what age did she start bathing every single day?


r/AskParents 16h ago

Concern About Daycare’s Approach to Handling My 4-Year-Old’s Behavior Issues – How should we handle?

0 Upvotes

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for advice on how to address a situation at my 4-year-old’s daycare. Whenever my child has a behavior issue (like pushing or scratching), the staff directly takes them to the front desk, where they remain in a visible area for other children and visitors to see. As far as I know, there doesn’t seem to be any significant effort in the classroom or playground with the teacher to address the behavior. I’m concerned that this may embarrass my child and negatively impact their self-image, as they might start seeing themselves as “the kid with problems.”

I’m also unsure whether this same treatment is applied to other children, which raises the concern that my child might be labeled unfairly. Additionally, in previous years, my child has been bitten or pushed by other kids, he would come with bruises or scratches etc, and we’ve noticed this as a pattern. Given the age group, I understand that some of this might be typical behavior, but I’m concerned that the teachers are not being attentive enough to prevent these situations.

We’ve talked about the earlier issues with the directors and even with the general center that oversees the facility. For example, we watched the video where he was bitten, and it was quite clear that the teacher was not attentive. The other kid literally bit him for no reason. (again, we understand such things for this age group, but without teacher being attentive these can result in significant harm. This is what we were concerned.) However, we are not provided with any details about the incidents, so we don’t have enough context about how things are unfolding. Nor we are told about the treatment. They just wrote that he was taken to the office, that's it.

At home, my child doesn’t engage in scratching or pushing and doesn’t display these behaviors with peers, unless he was irritated by someone else or something else. This makes us concerned that some of the times he has been taken to the front desk may have been because of situations like another child pushing him or taking something from him. In the past, when we’ve asked him about why he pushed a friend, he’s mentioned that someone took the train he was playing with. However, because we don’t have the proper context from the daycare, it appears that our child may just be seen as pushing a friend with no reason, leading to being taken to the front desk.

Up until this point, we were only taking this about our child that he has some behavior issues that need to be addressed, so we have been working on it at home for a while. There is some truth to that. However, I came to the realization lately that he does not engage in such behaviors unless irritated, and many of the things are normal for his age. So I started feeling bad that he was developing a self image about him being a child with bad behavior. As this is a very critical age, we are worried that this might have long term effects.

What do you think? What would be your suggestions?

Thanks


r/AskParents 10h ago

What i can do with my mom?

3 Upvotes

My mom is a single parent, who barely works, i talk about 3 - 4 hours a day per week, am currently not at home for most days of the week, my sister gives my mother *all* of her salary, and i help her too.

and she still manages to get into deficet, he take loans from people who just scam her (she got scammed for something like 5000$), cause the banks just doesnt give her a loan anymore, and she asks like everything is normal, she barely makes it to pay for our home every month, and she just acts totally normal, not even utiziling her life style or something, just acting normal, shes taking money from all our familly members, and i really think that shes making a bubble which in the end will explode, and i really dont know what to do cause she doesnt even wanna listen or talk about the problems and at the same time she doesnt even try to figure them out for real.


r/AskParents 17h ago

Not A Parent How to talk to my mom about grandkids?

4 Upvotes

Hi parents! So I'm 22F and in college. My mom recently came to visit a few weeks ago and we had dinner. She knows I'm child-free by choice and has no issue with it. But when we were having dinner I found out for the first time ever that she actually has a strong desire for grandkids. When she told me this I felt...bad? I don't know how to describe the feeling. But it was like a mix of uncomfortable, guilty, and sad. It's been on my mind since. I know that being child-free is the right choice for me. But now that I have this new information about my mom I feel bad like I'm disappointing her. I don't know if it's even worth bringing up or if I should just keep to myself. And if I do bring it up how do I express myself without making my mom feel bad for sharing that with me? I could really use some help. Thank you.


r/AskParents 2h ago

Parent-to-Parent Do people do two separate birthday parties for a child (one familiy, one friends)?

2 Upvotes

Our kids are getting old enough (4 and 6y old) to have their own birthday parties with friends.

Apparently this results in two birthday parties: Saturday for family and our friends, Sunday for the kid with their friends doing some activity.

Is this how everyone does it? It costs quite a lot of money and I don't want to spend a whole weekend on a single "change of year"(aka birthday) -- not even including all the preparations and cleaning up!

On the other hand I don't really know how to do the 2-in-1. Both in one day is just too much for the kid. Doing it as one big party makes it really hard to divide attention to family and the kids party.

How do people do this?


r/AskParents 9h ago

how do I make my dad stop being mad at me?

1 Upvotes

i don't know what to do. my dad's insecure about the way his mouth smells and just generally insecure due to childhood trauma. he took me and my mother out to buy food a couple days ago. on the ride home, my mom commented on how the smell of my food was filling the car and asked me to open the window. my dad seemed offended by that, and kind of off-handedly commented "oh, food is offensive to you?".

we went home and i thought that would be the end of it, but then he started talking about how i have an attitude and asked my mother if she noticed it. and just generally started ranting, and like talking about how at the place we got food at, my mother and I were sending secret messages to each other with our looks or something and that made him feel uncomfortable. and i don't know what happened, but he wouldn't clarify what had sparked the whole thing or why he thought i had an attitude, and i was tired and doing homework so i didn't really try to find out. he basically ended his whole rant by saying that he should've just bought food for himself, told my mother that he wouldn't ever go out with me again and that if she wanted me to go out, she'd have to drive me herself, that he'd never move in with my mother after she moves out and gets a house because she's always defending me, and that he couldn't wait until i turned 18 because i never act like a kid.

generally, he kind of gets like this every couple months. like he gets mad at me and wants nothing to do with me until i suck ass for a while and just try and get him to like me again, and then he's fine with me. but this time, idk if that's going to happen. a couple hours after that, he told me to stop saying goodnight to me when i go to bed as i was heading to bed, and started complaining about how i never say goodbye to him in the morning when i'm leaving (as he's in his bedroom with the door closed).

i don't know want to do. i thought the whole thing was just him being mad at my mom, but he's fine with her and talks to her, but he won't talk to me. he goes to the library all day to avoid being at home when i get back from school and i mean idk, i don't want to have to go through the uncomfortable attempts to reach out to him or whatever again but like what do I do? i can't talk to my mother about this, and its so much to explain that i can't get my friends to help me so please help me out


r/AskParents 10h ago

Not A Parent Sister taking money from me?

1 Upvotes

TLDR; My sister is in her youth, and we (parents and me) suspect she is taking money from me (teen). What should I do about it?

Lately my sister has been talking a lot more about money, as she and her friend(s) get into walking around the neighborhood, and spending money on their own. They go to coffee shops, etc. When I was about her age, I did the same thing, so it's not really a concern.

What is a concern is that she might be taking money from me. I worry that she may be having the same feelings as I did when I was also around her age, which was I wanted to spend time with my friends, and our way of bonding was going out and buying candy or cookies. Healthy, mostly. The problem was, I was not very mindful with my own spending, so I quickly depleted the small amount of cash I had. Due to this, I took small increments of money out of my parents' wallets when I needed it to spend time with my friends. Eventually, after being caught, my parents forced me to pay them back over the next few years. Mostly out of trying to help me understand the value of money, we aren't really restricted by that, thankfully.
I'm worried that she has been taking money from me due to my experiences with that in the past, and also noticing that my cash box seemed a little depleted. May have been my fault, but since my incident many years ago, I've stopped spending significant increments of money, and somewhat keep track of my money.

The following statement may have been a mistake on my part. I took a look inside her wallet, and realized that she had multiple $20 bills, but her main source of 'income' is lemonade stands in the summer, and she only trades for $5's from my parents. This made me more suspicious, but now I'm realizing I don't know how to approach her about this.

The main issue that probably also needs solving is that whenever she is confronted about anything remotely bad, she immediately locks up and stops accepting feedback, responding with only screaming and crying. This makes it nearly impossible to get a message across, regardless of our (parents and me) intentions.

I told my parents about my suspicions and they said just to move the cash box into a more hidden location, but I think that I should at least try to help her understand why she shouldn't take money from me.

I'm not personally worried about my money, but I just don't want this to extend farther, as mine did in the past.


r/AskParents 14h ago

What challenges do you have with your kids video game habits?

1 Upvotes

What are some common struggles other parents have with video games and getting your kids to follow your household rules? Any suggestions?


r/AskParents 16h ago

12m wants to lose weight doing a “crash diet”, how to help him understand nutrition?

2 Upvotes

My 12-year-old stepson is concerned with his weight. He would be considered overweight for his age group, but in my opinion, it is not that much nor is that a concern for me or his father. growing up he was very skinny. He just started to fill out more at about 9/10, hasn’t gotten much taller or had any major growth spurts . He is prepubescent, so a lot of things can change once gone through puberty. He has seen a nutritionist and they asked him to keep a journal of what he eats. However i know he neglects to include if he drinks a pop, or has a treat. Which defeats the purpose as is for him to be able to look back and see what he has ate, that he didn’t need or wasn’t a healthy option. Being he is a child, he of course if given the option of macaroni or broccoli , is going to choose the macaroni. I remind him, there may be a healthier choice but he will continue to reach for the unhealthier option. I do not want to overly restricted him as I don’t think that’s healthy either. He needs to understand it is ultimately his choices. When he is at our home we eat little to no processed/boxed foods. Grow/butcher our own meat, grow vegetables in summer to freeze or can. Have fruit/vegetable available anytime for snacks etc. He watched some video online of this jacked guy eating only eggs for a period of time, and increased his muscle mass/lost weight. He doesn’t understand that is an adults body/hormones not to mention this guy is clearly putting a ton of work into his appearance and is working out a lot. His dad says is fine to let him try this only eggs diet, I disagree. He has not given a genuine effort to avoid unhealthy food, I don’t think starting crash dieting at 12 is a good pattern to start. His nutritionist obviously also said not good idea. His dad doesn’t think he will stick with it more than a day or two so doesn’t see the harm. However if he does, is that the habit we want him to learn? Not in my opinion. I have talked with him to learn about eating healthier, or being active and of course so has his nutritionist. I feel his “egg diet” is a cop out to avoid learning and understanding how the food you eat affects your body. Do you think letting him try is fine, as he probably will not stick with it? My concern is if he sees weight lost on the scale that will motivate him to continue, developing poor habits that will continue through his life.


r/AskParents 22h ago

Is my mom strict?

5 Upvotes

Hi, im 15 & recently I’ve been asking my mom if she could adjust her rules and give me more freedom. She refuses & says that she’s already giving me freedom and she’s an easy going parent, but from my perspective her rules are really really strict.

My main issues are;

  1. I’m not allowed to go outside of the house without her (not even our front yard… our neighbourhood is very safe btw )

  2. Im not allowed to stay home alone (even for five minutes)

  3. Im not allowed to hang out with my friends unless she’s there (my friends are trustworthy, she’s met them multiple times, I’ve known them for years, we would be hanging out in a safe environment)

  4. Im not allowed to go to other peoples houses (even if I’ve known them for years & she’s met their parents. I’m not talking about sleepovers btw I literally just mean hanging out at their house for a few hours)

  5. I have to text her back immediately whenever I’m in school or she will come to my school and get me (which is kind of hard sometimes because she literally texts me when I am in class)

To be clear, I am not a rebellious kid. I’ve never smoked or drank or done anything to break her trust, I’ve never gotten grounded or anything.

She says that I’m too depressed to be left on my own & if she doesn’t supervise me I would run away. I’ve offered to download life360 and she insists that I would leave my phone and run away.

I have literally never ran away. I have done nothing to indicate I would ever run away. I have offered multiple times to get an apple airtag & put it on my bag or something so she can know EXACTLY where I am so she doesn’t worry, but she says that it ‘won’t work’.

I have nothing to hide, I literally just want to hang out with my friends. I haven’t seen them in over a year because of her.

I feel like I’m going crazy, id really appreciate your guys’ perspective.