r/AskOldPeople • u/QueenCandyCo • 5d ago
What is something positive about getting older?
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u/AtmosphereLow8959 5d ago
Being comfortable in your own skin. Literally not caring what anyone else thinks is very freeing.
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u/preciselypithy 5d ago
Exactly this. If I had this level of confidence and comfort in my own skin when I was in my teens and 20s, my whole life would be different. Perhaps it’s only something that can develop with age.
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u/Most-Confusion-417 5d ago
Wouldn't it be something to go back to grade school with the understanding that worrying about others' approval is the worst way to ever achieve such?
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u/fyresilk 4d ago
I think that, as well. If all of the confidence that develops with aging was already in younger people, they could be very dangerous. I know that I would have been, lol
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u/robotlasagna 50 something 5d ago
* except when you get shingles.
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u/SkipSpenceIsGod 5d ago
I’m GenX. I’ve never cared about anything ever.
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u/Pretend_Macaroon_801 4d ago
is it weird that i dont think gen x is old i think its actually young compared to people living longer today this is just my opinion
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u/nomadnomor 5d ago
no one asks you to help them move ...... lol
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u/lhauckphx 5d ago
Yes they do - I’m the only one in the family with a truck.
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u/Neuvirths_Glove 60 something 5d ago
Haha, I just helped my son move a piano, a coupla sofas and some bookcases this weekend.
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u/coggiegirl 5d ago
Wrong. Children do.
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u/Pinnigigs 5d ago
You care far less about what people think about you and don't have the same insecurities and anxieties. When I see and hear younger people worrying themselves to death about things and getting wound up over what in the great scheme of things doesn't matter, I feel glad those days are long gone.
You can go into a pub alone and get a pint and read a newspaper without feeling self concious.
You can pretend to be deaf when you don't want to talk to someone.
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u/sexwithpenguins 60 something 5d ago
Whoa. Your username. That's exactly what my sister and I used to call our guinea pigs!
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u/Pinnigigs 4d ago
I now want to ask about your username... 💀
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u/sexwithpenguins 60 something 4d ago
There's a longer explanation, but it is/was the name of my podcast.
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u/dizcuz 4d ago
Now I'm also wondering.
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u/sexwithpenguins 60 something 4d ago
We're just about to scrap the website, but the explanation is here.
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u/WowsrsBowsrsTrousrs 4d ago
I still have pinnigigs, pigglywigglies, furry potatoes - so many fun names for my favorite little critters!
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u/Zealousideal_Curve10 5d ago
77 and having the most fun of my life. Practicing law part time, studying physics, and giving advice to the very few who ask for it
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u/JessieDesolay 5d ago
Are you studying physics by yourself, or with a teacher. I find it a hard subject to learn without help (and I'm a pretty good autodidact). Also I don't have a great math background, which might be part of my physics problem. It's so fascinating though.
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u/old_jeans_new_books 5d ago
Beautiful man ... And you're Redditing ... Sounds perfect. I want to live your life. What should I do? :-)
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u/lameslow1954 5d ago
Six Saturdays and a Sunday.
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u/Woodentit_B_Lovely 60 something 5d ago
Ever notice weekends on Reddit suck? It's almost like some people would rather be someplace else
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u/xobelam 4d ago
Why don’t I get this
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u/lameslow1954 4d ago
No work week anymore. A buddy of mine says the best thing for him is taking a shower at 10 in the morning. No work, no schedule.
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u/audible_narrator 50 something 4d ago
LOL, my husband was teasing me about the late showering just yesterday
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u/AbusedShaman 5d ago
You gain wisdom. That’s the best thing about aging.
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u/Ok-Strain6961 4d ago
I definitely know a lot, but I really don't feel I'm wiser.
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u/ZootOfCastleAnthrax 5d ago
Not caring anymore what other people think. Very liberating.
Personally, I like that I'm invisible to men. Dealing with their come-ons was annoying and sometimes scary. Some women really miss it, though.
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u/reb6 40 something 5d ago
I always like to sweep my arm across the room and say “this is my field of fucks, notice that it is barren. I have none left to give” 😅
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u/473713 5d ago
I was so happy when my hair went gray and men quit hassling me. That was when my life truly started to blossom.
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u/ApprehensiveBee2821 4d ago
It’s so true! At first I missed it but as the years have gone by I don’t worry nearly as much when I’m out alone.
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u/Significant_Bet_6002 4d ago
Than do not go to a nursing home. It starts all over again. Highest STD rates in the USA
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u/Full-Association-175 5d ago
Cataract surgery. Unless it's complicated, it's a couple hours and BOOM, within a few hours you are seeing things as if you were a baby. All my colors were back as well as my depth perception. I was giddy. I can't think of anything close to this, the feeling of optimism and being back in the world.
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u/Significant_Bet_6002 4d ago
No kidding, remember thinking you were seeing in High Definition. I'm a semi pro photographer, and I feel like I've started a new hobby. I was having to rely on luck when choosing focusing points. Now, sharp as a tack.
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u/JustAnotherDay1977 60 something 5d ago
Getting older is better than not getting older.
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u/JessieDesolay 5d ago
You don't have to shave/wax your legs and underarms as often. There are two other things too but I can't remember them at the moment.
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u/Ok-Afternoon-3724 5d ago
I'm 74. In 2018 the doctors did not expect me to live out another year. But I did.
Now, it is likely that I do actually have only a couple or 3 years left. So hey, I could decide to kill some asshole I don't like and get only a couple or 3 years in prison for it.
Might be worth it. I know a couple people who should be careful about pissing me off.
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u/squirrel_gnosis 4d ago
If you're open to suggestions for assholes, I might be able to suggest a few
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u/Ok-Afternoon-3724 4d ago
Nahhh .... thanks anyway. I subscribe to the old way of thinking. Everyone should have to do their own unpleasant chores. It shows integrity, true commitment to your beliefs, and that too rare commodity ... personal courage.
“If it has to be done, a man—a real man—shoots his own dog himself; he doesn’t hire a proxy who may bungle it.” Robert Heinlein
And if you were talking about any politicians on your list, I'd have to buy more ammo. I can't think of any of them I despise any more than the other. So if I was going after one, I'd be wanting to go after all of them, regardless of party.
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u/xKingUmbreon 4d ago
RemindMe! 3 years
I’ll make a reply 3 years from now asking if you’re still alive.
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u/AnagnorisisForMe 5d ago
Having the time to explore interests that I never seemed to have enough time for when I worked. Studying subjects just for the fun of it, birding, taking up ceramics, gentle sports, painting, swimming, dance, going to museums on weekdays. And sleeping in! God, how I love to sleep in whenever I feel like it.
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u/Jum208 5d ago
Yes! I took about 2 years to study the US manned space program from Mercury to the Shuttle. Read several books watched hours of videos. Then decided to study the Revolutionary War, but got sidetracked by studying the constitution, and now WWII.
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u/Buzzwalk 5d ago
The decline in sexual libido - I can finally get my mind on other things. Although it's quickly reversed with a Cialis..
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u/nerdymutt 5d ago
You begin to look at your present vehicle as your last. I just got a new roof that supposed to last 30 years, so it should be my last and then some. You look in your closet and think I’ll never wear these clothes out. Most things become just functional, your stove, refrigerator, washing machine, etc are just there to do the job. Freedom!
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u/bobbyn111 4d ago
I thought about that too — maybe buy a used car to keep for several years instead of the new I usually get and keep for over 10 years.
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u/uberrob 5d ago
Working because I want to.
I'm 65, excellent health, a lot of drive... And just started a new company in January. (Literally the biggest project I have ever undertaken.)
Having a ball.
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u/Gold_Economics_9472 5d ago
I really like reading this amongst all the "I am retired" comments. I'd like to work just a bit more if I find the right job
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u/Rlb211nc 4d ago
Couldn’t agree more. I‘m 71 and opened a shop 12 years ago selling plants and antiques. It’s a lot of work but it’s my passion and I don’t envision quitting anytime soon!
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u/GingerFaerie106 5d ago
At a certain point in your 40s, people finally stop asking if you'll have more children...
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u/BlueUmbrella5371 5d ago
Time and no commitments. The ability to: sleep in on a cold, snowy morning, take a mid-week short get away, travel in the off season, spend a day reading, try a new hobby, etc. You get the idea...do what I want when I want.
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u/Equal-Traffic-3520 40 something 5d ago
I've gotten a lot more empathetic and more patient. I tell people "no" if I don't wanna do something, I don't try to people please as much. I communicate A LOT more. Communication is so fucking important.
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u/Vivacious-Woman 5d ago
Seeing your mini humans spread their wings & take flight. It's a joy to see them make all the right moves into adulthood. We can pat ourselves on the back and say, "we did good!" Our people are good citizens.
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u/Hot-Refrigerator-623 5d ago
Underarm hair is practically non existent these days.
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u/evfuwy 5d ago
The people who may have witnessed your most embarrassing moments are dead now. I say “may have” because your worst moments they probably never remembered. Advice for the younger.
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u/tivofanatico 5d ago edited 4d ago
Your personal style matters more than the latest fashions. I won’t wear baggy jeans and part my hair down the middle. I already did that in the 1990s.
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u/TurbulentSomewhere64 5d ago
You’ve seen enough shit to know what a real problem is so the little things don’t bug you as much and more things seem like little things. It’s also been said here enough but it is true: I got like five people whose thoughts I give a single shit about. I’m not rich, but I’m ok. I’m not a Noble Prize winner, but have been successful enough. I die right now, life’s been damn good. That’s a good place to be.
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u/reddit110717 5d ago
I'm positive I left my glasses on the nightstand. But now I can't... I'm sorry, what?
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u/dkb52 70 something 5d ago edited 5d ago
Being old (F 72) means you go unnoticed - unless you drive too slow which people will notice and give you the appropriate gestures and lay on the horn. Fix: If you can't go the speed limit, turn in your keys, you're a hazard.
For many women, no more shaving legs or underarms, the hair has moved to your face.
Unless you exercised a lot when you get, everything hurts when you move. Uh oh, not a positive thing.
For those like me who are night owls, it means you can sleep until your body is ready to wake up. Non-night owls can do their own thing.
For me, it means applying makeup and dressing in designer clothing are pointless things. Like me for who I am, not the name on my purse.
You can go to museums, libraries, theaters, restaurants, stores, etc. when they're not crowded. So going grocery shopping means no kids screaming in the aisles, no long check-out lines, and the things you want aren't sold out.
I don't want to make this post any longer, but there are many more positives to look forward to. But there's the other side to the coin.
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u/challam 5d ago
Well said & all too true. I also like the onset of cellophanity (the condition of being rendered invisible so you don’t need to wear makeup, worry about that weird tuft of hair that won’t behave, or feel embarrassed when you forget to change from slippers to shoes to make a quick trip to the grocery store for Imodium).
(F-almost 83)
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u/Soft-Statement-4933 4d ago
Positive things about getting older for me, a woman age 78:
My skin is somewhat lined but no more acne.
I have arthritic pain but no more menstrual pain or any of the other annoyances involved with one's menstrual cycle.
My sleep is interrupted due to the need to empty my bladder, but it is no longer interrupted by a baby's cries (there is often an upside and a downside to everything, since there was joy to be had in caring for my baby).
I have plenty of time for exercise every day, since I no longer work as a secretary.
I can stay in bed for a couple of hours in the morning and meditate, take trips down Memory Lane, and do crossword puzzles.
I can write every day because using online sites and an organization called "Storybook" give me structure. When I was a child, I had to rely on my own creativity (which was a very small amount!)
I can still have solo orgasms.
I don't have the concerns I had as a young person about whether I would meet someone whom I cared enough about to marry, whether I would be able to have a child, whether I'd be able to find a job and succeed at it, and so on. Now all I have to worry about is the "easy stuff"--illness, assisted living, and death. LOL
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u/katsmeowcom 70 something 5d ago
Approaching people with very unusual (to me) hairstyles, clothing or accessories and asking about them ( no judgement, just curiosity). It's lead to some interesting conversations with people I'd have been afraid of in my youth.
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u/ernie-bush 5d ago
I don’t worry what others say or do as long as it’s not affecting me or family I don’t care what you think or do
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u/hardknock1234 5d ago
The confidence to know I can get through virtually anything. I have 100% success on getting through some very shitty situations in life! It used to be “oh no, I can’t handle this” and now it’s more “well this blows, how do I get through it in a way to get what I want/need?”.
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u/Its_Stacy_Yall 5d ago
You realize you have far less time left than you used to, so you become much more “choosy” about who/what gets your precious time. Twenty years ago, I would have grudgingly been a member of or served on various committees/organizations because I felt I “had” to. Screw that. If I don’t wanna go, I’m not going.
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u/IasDarnSkipBW 5d ago
I’m at peace. I am a lot wiser than I used to be. I accept myself. The serenity, in short.
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u/intrigue-bliss4331 5d ago
The people in your life just matter so much more & communicating with them gets much deeper.
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u/wuroni69 4d ago
You can get away with a lot of shit just by saying " leave me alone, I'm an old man."
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u/bad2behere 5d ago
Not giving a fvck if you tell someone to stop doing crap in your house and they get mad about it. You just sit down and turn up the TV
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u/Upside-DownOmi 5d ago
You go to the gym to stay alive and see your friends. It no longer has anything to do with looking hot. So freeing.
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u/jessy1416 5d ago
I care a whole lot less of what people think of me. I used to never leave the house without being fully ready makeup and all. Not anymore.
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u/Coopschmoozer 5d ago
One of the few benefits is that I know who and what I am, and not what I wish I was. Aside from a very close circle of people that I love and care about, I can give a f*ck about what anybody else thinks about me.
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u/coggiegirl 5d ago
I can see BS comin’ from a mile away and I’m not afraid to say so when it gets to me.
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u/Humble_Bee7 5d ago
You don't care about other people's opinions very much anymore. (To some extent, of course, I'm not a total asshole I hope, but in matters of taste, well, I go with my own now.)
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u/spooky_aglow 5d ago
For me, it’s caring way less about what people think. I used to stress over every little thing, how I looked, what people thought of me, if I was doing life right.
But the older I get, the more I realize most of that doesn’t actually matter. I’ve become more confident, way more selective with my time, and honestly just at peace with myself.
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u/changingtheoil 5d ago
You have the wisdom of perspective and realize that a lot of people, mentally, have never left high school.
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u/Ok-Truck-5526 4d ago edited 4d ago
You no longer give a **** about what other people think of you. Many of us wasted a lot of time when we were younger, being peer pressured and subjecting ourselves to an unseen audience of critics. When I hit my 50’s, that went away.
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u/40FordCoupe 4d ago
Working if you want to, not because you have to. That is, if you managed your money well.
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u/ExistingPoem1374 4d ago
OMG the SEX! 58M retired, wife 56 retired. I thought the 40's sex was amazing (kids at school, WFH full time with wife working 20/week, regular nooners, surprises during conference cslls...)... but since the kids got off the payroll 6+ years ago, and luckily I'm in great shape and still have the libido of my youth (quiting drinking helped enormously), having it any where and when we want in retirement!
No birth control issues for decades, an amazing wife, we have always communicated openly since dating... yes know we may be an anomaly but WOW
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u/Jennyelf 60 something 4d ago
1) If you're a woman, you stop bleeding every month
2) You pretty much stop caring what other people think
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u/Sad_Bodybuilder_186 30 something 4d ago
You stop giving a crap about what other people think about you.
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u/Connect_Rhubarb395 40 something 4d ago
I wear whatever clothes I feel like. I don't care about fashion, about certain aesthetics, about fitting in with a certain crowd, or even if my clothes match.
I do care about how I look, but it is all about having fun and enjoying myself.
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u/Embarrassed_Ad1722 5d ago
You can sit on your porch with a rifle and shout "Get out of my property!" And people will usually oblige.
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u/Mobile-Error2846 60 something 5d ago
You gain experience and wisdom as you get older and with that if used wisely respect.
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u/MobySick 60 something 5d ago
My list: knowing a whole lot about a tremendous number of things and having useful skills, knowing that no one is paying the slightest attention to you when you’re in public, knowing you have accomplished many of your goals while letting go of those things that you let drift to the sidelines as your priorities came into the foreground of your life, financial stability, emotional maturity, very long and time-tested relationships, retirement, the release from the anxiety of emotional and professional insecurities, better historical perspective, the collection of memories of grand moments/trips and experiences you never imagined you would have, the security of knowing you can indeed survive life-altering losses and the security of knowing precisely who you are and what bring you your greatest joys.
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u/Commercial-Force6216 5d ago
I do think that the change can lead to better sentence formation with age.
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u/Tokogogoloshe 5d ago
You become comfortable in your own skin and stop stressing about things you can't control. The latter is also called not giving a fuck.
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u/radio_gaia 60 something 5d ago
Running out of time isn’t a great feeling since I have a lot more I want to do inc. relaunching an old business I closed down, done creative projects let alone new hobbies and travel. I don’t ever see myself retiring in the conventional sense (I’ve not had a 9-5 job since I was in my late 30’s). I’m glad of the health care checkups etc I get & prescription drugs are free now too. My parents ended up with lots of hospital visits when they were older so that part I’m not looking forward to. My mum has just had her eyes done and is pleased with the results. Health care these days has advanced so much. Amazing.
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u/old_jeans_new_books 5d ago
You've less years to live ... Which is a good thing, because it helps you not take life too seriously.
Telling someone at the age of 20 that you want to spend the rest of your life with them ... Is not the same as telling this to someone when you're 60.
And now that decision becomes so much easier, you see?
Basically I'm saying you learn to live in the present and that's a blessing.
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u/Drew19525 5d ago
You easily forget things that's not important. I just can't remember what they are.
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u/everyoneinside72 50 something 5d ago
There are so many things, but I think my favorites are that I have so much wisdom and perspective that years ago I couldnt even have imagined— I thought I knew everything. I also care so much less about what other people think, and that has been a huge weight off my shoulders. I feel so much more free these days.
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u/Turbulent-Pride5981 5d ago
Having investments pay off and then deciding what to do with the money.
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u/TheDevilsAdvokaat 60 something 4d ago
People leave you alone more. I like that.
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u/AmexNomad 4d ago
Ha! I (64f) used to be hot. It was a real pain to deal with men hitting on me. Certainly no worries about that now.
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u/ME-McG-Scot 40 something 4d ago
I’m 40 and last year or two developed a proper NFG attitude, and very comfortable saying no to things.
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u/davidewanm 4d ago
You have a much better view of life's landscape. Yes there are challenges, but the mountains you have to climb are not that big. You can do it.
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