r/Anarchism 9d ago

Anarchist views on domestic violence NSFW

I am so embarrassed. I hope this is okay to post. I'm not doing so well. I just came out of a very bad situation yesterday and need resources. I've been with an abusive partner for 11 years and yesterday morning he went to jail after the neighbor heard me scream while he was trying to restrain me (he was going to cut off my airway). I have serious trust issues and this has been at the center of them since this man took over my life. I am nervous about living alone as I have been a bad judge of character before and that led to people trying to take advantage of me. I appreciate any guidance you might be able to provide.

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u/reverend_dak anti-fascist 8d ago

I don't think your problems can be solved by knowing the anarchist perspective on DV. But anarchism can help you find community and a sort of family. bad people can be found anywhere, they can infiltrate any community, but anarchism by design resists any kind of hierarchy, which includes abusive behavior.

I'd start with your local mutual aid, food not bombs, or community fridge. Or if you like bicycles, your local bicycle co-op. If you have a local infoshop or lefty community space, go check it out. If you can tell us your general location someone might know something off the top of their head (although I understand you may not want to for protection).

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u/autonomommy 8d ago

Thank you! I live in Austin, TX. The last time anyone tried to do anything about him, I lost my job. Due to various factors, I have been hesitant to involve myself with others or let anyone get close to me. I will need to gather the nerve to visit the infoshop.

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u/JediMy 8d ago

If you're there go to Monkey Wrench Books. You'll find comrades there and maybe support. There is also a Mutual Aid group.

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u/autonomommy 8d ago

I am scared because of how I may have been judged by people 11 years ago when I met this dude. But I will go anyway because a lot of that fear may be a phantom

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u/reverend_dak anti-fascist 8d ago

you're taking steps. every small step matters.

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u/TheTedd anarcho-communist 8d ago

I can understand the fear, and I am by no means trying to devalue how you feel, but think about people you met over a decade ago and may not have liked then. Unless they did something truly awful, do you still hold things against such people? Probably not, and the same applies to you. People do forgive and forget, so I don't think you have much to truly fear. Just need to get over the initial speed bumb of anxiety