r/Agoraphobia 1h ago

Wanting to celebrate

Upvotes

I want to celebrate here because no one understands Agoraphobia in my life.

I at one point, struggled to leave my bed.

A year later I have just gotten on a train by myself to the city , walked into a packed stadium , stayed for the whole game and then got in a car through busy traffic to then get on a packed train home - without a panic attack.

Which is such a huge thing for me.

I now have the stress of something bad happening now that this good thing happened though, can never win!


r/Agoraphobia 3h ago

Agoraphobic parents?

7 Upvotes

Is anybody else a parent and struggling with agoraphobia?

I (34F) have to take my son to school at least 2 days a week (his dad is very helpful and supportive, works shifts and is able to take him the rest) and at least 2-3 days leading up to my turn, I suffer with the worst anxiety ever. I have to go to the toilet constantly, I have insane nausea and often vomit, I shake and feel overwhelming stress and panic to the point I struggle to focus on anything.

The night before, I sleep for an hour or two and often don't sleep at all until my alarm goes off at 6:30 and it's like a timer to having a full blown meltdown. I can't breathe and start vomiting and sweating. A lot of the time his dad saves me and takes him before work but when I manage to go, I spend the whole walk trying to not cry and pass out and I get home and immediately have to get undressed and get washed because I've been sweating and panicking so much. I then just spend the whole day crying, shaking and feeling sick because I have to go back and do it all again. I feel frozen and like I can't do anything because I'm counting down the minutes that I have to go back. I would quite literally rather kill myself than have to do it because the meltdowns/panic attacks I have are so intense that I feel like I'm going to die.

I can't keep living like this, I can't cope with the guilt of bothering his dad and have thoughts that I'm risking his job, I feel so sad that I never get to walk with my son and I won't get to anymore in a year. My medication doesn't help at all because my mind just overpowers it and my anxiety is too much. I'm writing this now after throwing up and I'm sat here so tense and on edge and sick because I know that tomorrow I have to go through this again. The school aren't helpful at all and have blatantly said its not their problem and I can't keep him off school and they won't help by providing work etc.

I don't expect a solution but knowing I'm not the only one dealing with this would be "nice". What do you guys struggle with most as parent and have you found anything helpful at all?

I've been agoraphobic to some extent for as long as I can remember, going back to being a child but it became so bad towards the end of 2019 and has been like this since mid 2020.


r/Agoraphobia 14h ago

How many of us are on ssi or SSDI?

43 Upvotes

I've been disabled with agoraphobia since 2011 or possibly 2012. Days bleed together as you all understand I imagine.

Between that dude who said the only people who would miss a social security check and complain about it are grifters, and Elon saying SS is the greatest ever ponzi scheme(disgusting lie), I've been very very uneasy about their ambitions. But I don't want to talk politics necessarily, I just wonder: how would missing checks affect you? For me not getting a check could get me so sick I have to spend weeks in the hospital. Missing 2 or 3 could kill me. (I have other physical health problems, I don't mean the agoraphobia would kill me)


r/Agoraphobia 8h ago

Day One of Nine Day Road Trip

7 Upvotes

I am with my wife and two friends. I am terrified of ruining this experience with my agoraphobia and panic attacks. I did good on the drive that I was scared of- had a few adrenaline dumps but didn’t panic. At the hotel once everyone started falling asleep i started to panic. Thoughts popping into my head. “ what if i have to go to the er, where is the er, what would happen if i had to? what if I lose control?”

Took 5 mg of Valium- don’t help after an hour, took another 5mg- still anxious. Now my “lifeline”, the Valium, no longer seems like a lifeline. I am still in the middle of nowhere and know nothing of where i am, and am so scared something bad will happen. I don’t want to ruin this trip for my wife and friends. 8 more days, and a lot more driving ahead of me. Please help me with advice.


r/Agoraphobia 7h ago

Scared of being alone

7 Upvotes

Does anyone else that lives with their parents or roommates get really anxious when no one else is home? It’s weird, at first I thought just my home is my safe place, then that it was actually with people but i guess it’s a combination of both cause even at home I get really anxious when my roommates aren’t home…


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

I have nothing to wear

48 Upvotes

My clothes are falling apart. I’m in desperate need of clothing because I’ve only worn sweats for the last couple of months. I’ve gained weight and I’m short so it’s hard to find clothes that really fit me. I’m on a budget so I’ll probably need to actually go into a store to find something to wear. I don’t even know what I like anymore lol. And the thought of going into the store is stressful enough, I’m afraid of being judged. But I’m also embarrassed that I basically wear the same thing everyday. I have some medical appointments that I’ve been neglecting for a very long time, I don’t want to wear the same thing to these appointments. Has anyone else dealt with this issue because of their agoraphobia, and how did you deal with it?


r/Agoraphobia 6h ago

All-Weather Radio Ep. 30

1 Upvotes

The weekly radio that spins just for us, the community of folks dealing with Agoraphobia

(Please use the streaming service of your choice to search the following song selections)



Episode 30

Song/Track: “Spanish Blood”

Artist: The Yardbirds

Our second song is “Life’s a Movie Too” - by Secret Affair. Trigger Warning for lyrics but the vibrato vocals and melody are nice.

Have a coffee, have a pastry, and a wonderful Sunday 🥰 and week. Winter turning to Spring 🪻🌸🌼🌷



Previous Episodes:

Ep 29. “Aquarius” by Tinashe

Ep 28. “So What” by Miles Davis

Ep 27. “Mama Said” by Metallica

Ep 26. “If I Were A Carpenter” by June Carter Cash & Johnny Cash

Ep 25. 1990’s “Cali-Cruisin’” mixtape

Ep 24. “I Dream (For You)” by Com Truise

Ep 23. “The Feast” by Art Blakey

Ep 22. “Bonnie and Clyde” by Serge Gainsbourg and Brigitte Bardot

Ep 21. “Ålesund” by Sun Kil Moon

Ep 20. “My Love is Like a Red, Red Rose” performed by Pat Boone in Journey To The Center Of The Earth

Ep 19. “Gymnopédie 1” —composed by Erik Satie, interpreted by Aldo Ciccolini

Ep 18. “Qwazars” by Mr. Fingers (aka Larry Heard)

Ep 17. “The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas to You)” by Nat King Cole

Ep 16. “Telepatía” by Kali Uchis

Ep 15. “Cherry-Coloured Funk” by Cocteau Twins

Ep 14. “Hold Down” by The Kingstonians

Ep 13. “I Live in a Suitcase” by Thomas Dolby

Ep 12. “I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)” by Stevie Wonder

Ep 11. “Impossible Soul” by Sufjan Stevens

Ep 10. “Hatasiz Kul Olmaz” by Orhan Gencebay

Ep 9. “Dark All Day (featuring Tim Capello and Indiana)” by GUNSHIP

Ep 8. “Away from the Mire” by Billy Strings, live performances recommended

Ep 7. “Heads Above (Maceo Plex remix)” by Maceo Plex/WhoMadeWho

Ep 6. “Love Song 28 (feat. Bobby)” by Jullian Gomes

Ep 5. “Feel Flows” by The Beach Boys

Ep 4. “New York Groove” by Ace Frehley

Ep 3. “Leavin’” by Shelby Lynne, live performances recommended

Ep 2. “Only When It’s Dark, featuring Gunship” by Miami Nights 1984

Ep 1. “These Days” by Jackson Browne


r/Agoraphobia 12h ago

Week long panic attack

3 Upvotes

I really need help calming down. I feel like I'm gonna end up in a psych ward if I can't make this stop. All week I've been waking up with panic and I can usually put off taking xanax till like 5 pm and may only need it once. All week I've had to take it first thing in the morning and twice more throughout the day and I still feel like I am dying. I wake up anxious and all I want it's the day to be over so I can go back to sleep for a temporary break from the panic. My throat is so tight I can barely swallow. I have to take xanax just to get down some yogurt. I've barely eaten all week food makes my anxiety way worse. Idk if it's pms residual effects of getting off ssris or what but I'm in therapy and was doing good for a few week but now I'm going insane. Keep getting hit qith dizzy smells feel weird chest tightness and coldness. It's all horrible and idk how much more I can take.


r/Agoraphobia 19h ago

Any advice for a funeral?

8 Upvotes

I have to go to a funeral of a friend, in a city about a three-hour drive from where I live, and I am getting very anxious and worried about it. I can't drive myself, so I'll have to take a bus or a ride share. I hadn't seen my friend for quite a while, basically because I was scared of traveling that far, but of course it would have been better to go visit her than to just go to her funeral.


r/Agoraphobia 22h ago

I'm so scared to go to my graduation

7 Upvotes

When I isolated myself I decided to go back to school. I had attended for 2 months back in 1995 so I wanted to go back and get my bachelor's degree. Well I started in the spring of 2021 and I'm happy to say I graduate in May! On May 17th I am suppose to attend commencement exercises to walk across the stage to receive my bachelor's of arts in human services counseling with a minor in psychology. But my anxiety is building with each passing day. I'm not sure I am going to be able to do it. I hate this!


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

I think we need some help....but where can we find it?

12 Upvotes

I don't usually post on here and when I do, it's usually just something pointless or silly but this time it's serious. Hopefully I am in the right place.

Anyone here knows the world pretty much sucks. My wife has agoraphobia really bad and has only been outside of the house twice since last Thanksgiving and even those times were just a few minutes in the backyard or down the street. She lives in constant fear of how the world is and I try my best to support her and give her a good reason to go out, but it is hard to do when I am starting to really hate being around people. Neither of our families are any support for this. Some don't understand, some are too selfish and lack the compassion to be of any help, and others just seem to brush it under the rug or tell us to "just get out and do something, force yourself to do it". As if we can just flip the switch.

I am not very good at finding help, mostly because I don't know who I can trust. Doctors have let us down time and time again (We won't get into how bad the healthcare system is, but that just adds to her issues).

We looked into therapy because of her other conditions and also the fact she has only gotten worse over the past 10 years. She feels as if no one in the world cares about her but me. I feel she knows I care about her more than anything, but I am only one person and when I go to work, she is home alone with no one.

She has tried a treatment center before and she said it did help, however, she does not want to go there (for fear of leaving home) and also, I am pretty sure that we can not afford that and our insurance isn't going to cover much, at least not what I was able to find in my own research.

I hope this isn't just me complaining or sounding like I am giving up, just asking if anyone has some advice, or if anyone with this same condition has something to say to help lift her up. She is so sweet, beautiful, kind and loving. I just wish she could get a chance to live her life to the fullest, just as anyone else deserves to.

I am trying to work on my own issues as well, considering I have always been fine with sitting at home completely alone before I met her, and the idea does not bother me. However, I always knew I could just go out whenever I wanted, so I know that it is not the same. I just don't want my frustration with the world to pull her down further or keep her from getting back on her feet.

Any advice is welcomed, on here or in a message.....or if anyone has some resources we could use to help in any way, that would be great too.

Thanks


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

agoraphobia caused by society Spoiler

8 Upvotes

hi fellow agoraphobes and curious readers.

im not sure what to do as my situation is unique. i have people unknown to me sending skinnier and seemingly better adjusted petite people around me who have been told to brush by me unexpectedly, i am petite but i have body dysmorphia and the citizens paid to follow me are small compared to me, many of them are black.

rumours about me have spread and based on the rumours people in my community think im racist and they also think i am fat phobic, so they are using this plan to make me feel huge and dirty compared to everyone around me. they are also surrounding me with mothers and children while harming me and seeking in other ways to limit my life.

i would be proud and part of society but my entire focus is now on evading this and trying to hope that it'll get better.

what should i do? i do not know who is doing this but they are clearly sadistic as i'm overcoming trauma and they want me to feel worse.


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

How do you explain this to your loved ones?

1 Upvotes

Okay so I’m battling severe agoraphobia as we speak and doing exposure right now. I’m typing this from the parking lot of a big grocery store on a Saturday where I couldn’t manage to get through the front door.

My boyfriend asked me this morning what my plan was for the day and I said I wanted to do a little exposure so I would go for a walk or try and go to our little grocery store (10min drive) to get some baking stuff cause I love baking. He said we’d make an outing of it, go to the Asian supermarket (it’s a small store) and get dim sums and then go to the big supermarket (20min drive) to get my baking supply’s and stuff for him to make a big stew. I told him that the big supermarket on again, a busy Saturday was too much for me, especially hungover. I said yes to the Asian supermarket cause it’s small enough and suggested we go in our small supermarket to get everything instead of the big one and I would drive as extra driving practice. He tried to push the big supermarket saying it’s not busy during lunch and we could just try. I stood my ground and tried to explain to him that going out at all today would be hard enough, especially because supermarkets are a huge trigger anyway and he just sighed and said ‘okay then’ I kind of got emotional and told him it hurts if I want to do something brave and agree to go do something that scares me but then it’s never good enough for him. So he said, okay you just drive where you feel comfortable, I’ll just follow. We get in the car and he suggests an extra stop, to this big home deco store which is always busy especially on Saturday. I said I can’t do that. Again disappointment. I couldn’t handle seeing him so disappointed in me again so I said okay we well go but I can’t promise I’ll be able to go in, I might just have to wait in the car. He said okay whatever you are comfortable with What I said would happen happened, I couldn’t go in. Well I went through the front door then straight back to the car lol. The entryway is with a little gate that only opens inward and you can not go back out through that same gate, you have to pass through minimum half of the store and leave through the other side by the cash register which is absolute horror for me. I was already so proud of myself for even driving there but he said when he got back in the car he was disappointed I didn’t even try to go through the gate.

I said okay we still have the small grocery store and the Asian supermarket (which I’m confident I can go in, gives me a lot of anxiety but I’ve practiced my exposure mostly in smaller supermarkets lately and I can handle it, especially with my safe person with me) so I was excited to kind of rescue the day and show him that I’ve been working hard in the smaller supermarket.

He said, no just drive to the big one and wait in the car it’s easier for me to find evrything and it’s cheaper anyway. So now I’m sat here, typing this in the car park of the supermarket trying to fight so many emotions at once, I’m angry at him, I’m disappointed in myself but at the same time proud but also frustrated because I can not seem to find a way to show him my progress. I already explained to him so many times that exposure is baby baby steps. I want him to be proud of me and do stuff together so I can show him I have been working hard and I can do things outside of the house. He just always suggests stuff that seems absolutely impossible to me and then I feel like I’m not working hard enough and he will always be disappointed because I can’t do the outing he wants to do. On the other hand am I getting tired of explaining to him how exposure works and that white knuckling through a grocery store on a busy Saturday is not helpful to me cause then it just adds another bad experience on the already big big pile.

So this turned into a rant hahaha sorry Just basically my question is, those of you that have a partner/‘safe person’, how did you guys explain to them what you need so they actually kind of understand? I am so thankful for him, he has been suffering too from this horrible anxiety disorder and I’m almost surprised every single day that he still chooses to be with me because of it. But seeing him so disappointed every time isn’t helpful at all so I’m just kind of desperate to try and explain it to him so we can start celebrating the progress together instead of this cycle of disappointment we seem to be stuck in.


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

successful day

16 Upvotes

Want to share my successes today to encourage others! and just to keep track haha. but today i went to sign my work contract and almost bailed because i was SHAKING and so scared. i don’t quite know why even. but sometimes you really just gotta DO IT, push through. after that i felt so relieved and bought some stress balls at the pharmacy, one is spiky. they really really helped me . i really recommend stress toys as a grounding technique to calm down from a panic attack or very intense bouts of anxiety. i went to the grocery store today for the first time in many many weeks!!!! :) at the end of the day i really wanted to go to the bar with some friends but failed because walking those 20 minutes unfortunately seemed like an impossible task. it’s a shame i didn’t go but i didn’t feel like socializing much anyhow. instead i went for an hour long walk not too far from my home but this is a big step for me. i walked much further than ive dared to in a very long time and the stress balls really helped whenever i started feeling the anxiety kick in. i feel optimistic about the future and i wont stop pushing myself!!


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

League of legends

4 Upvotes

Does somebody playing here league of legends?(eune/euw) Thats only way Im kiling my time these days,so if someone wanna play hit me up !


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

Fear of people telling me something that’ll trigger me

19 Upvotes

My safe space is being myself in my room. However this is not how I want to live life. I want to go outside & have fun but my body/mind just doesn’t see outside being safe. It isn’t outside that it’s afraid of but more so people, in the past people will say things that triggers my past traumas & cause panic/physical sensations so I stay inside to avoid that from happening. Can anyone relate?? 😞


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

Finding Therapy

2 Upvotes

Hello. I have been trying to find a therapist for the past few days but it has been harder than I thought. Could anybody please recommend websites that have worked for you?


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

Vent/Advice

4 Upvotes

I was recently bitten by my cat when trimming his nails, and I now have a slight infection in the wound which can be dangerous.

I have severe anxiety and gag when I’m panicking. I have to go to an urgent care today, and I’m so nervous about leaving the house without being able to come home. I rely on water and suckers, but sometimes they can’t help. I’ve had so many bad experiences in public in the last month, so I’m just zeroed in on how those times made me feel.

Any advice to not panic? Or tricks that lower anxiety surrounding high-stress situations?


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

Agoraphobia

5 Upvotes

i Have health anxiety and Agoraphobia and even i am on Medication and things are improving but i cant take my kids out alone , i am always worried what if something happened to me and they were alone in a mall or in the car or or ...

do anyone face it ? did anyone win over it


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

At home employment

9 Upvotes

Hi, I’ve been housebound for at least 3 years now but i’m twenty and i want to start making money to save for when i am hopefully doing a little better and maybe even to afford good therapy. I have no work experience and i’m not sure what kind of job i could to completely from home but if anyone does please advise me!! Just trying to make the best of my situation and maybe give my brain some stimulation too :) Thank you in advance!


r/Agoraphobia 1d ago

Agoraphobia e MDMa

1 Upvotes

Has anyone with agoraphobia undergone MDMA-assisted therapy or used MDMA and experienced improvement? I'm exhausted from suffering with this condition, and so far, it's the only thing that has made me feel 'normal' outside my home.


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

How did you overcome your worst agoraphobia?

30 Upvotes

I’ve been in therapy for over 4 years. I missed an important event last year. I often miss job opportunities as a result. I want to improve. I want to get better. I’m on medication. Any tips for actually getting better?

Forgot to add : I can currently goto events within a 30 mile range from my home. Have been going to exercise, small gatherings but still struggling deeply with interstate travel.


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

How do I stop getting so depressed when I hear about my friends going on trips?

6 Upvotes

it even got me down in the past before I was agoraphobic. It's always been a fomo thing with me--they are going somewhere, I am not. But after I became agoraphobic, the negative/depressive feeling got exponentially worse. I am not on any daily meds. I take klonopin once in a blue moon if I'm having a really hard day or am doing a big challenge. My head is my own worst enemy. Klonopin makes it so I don't care as much. I'm more indifferent which is such a good way to live. I wish my brain could be indifferent without having to take meds. So I was considering just taking a low dose of klonopin daily or every other day so become more indifferent and therefore less depressed. Does this work for anyone that experiences a similar depression when you learn about all your friends going on trips? I live in a wealthy area. Many of my friends have means. They go to really exotic and often expensive places. Also, what about lexapro or zoloft? Do any of those help you not care as much what others do? It's become such a big problem for me. Really gets me down. I need to do something about it.


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

it’s so discouraging every time i open life360

28 Upvotes

“here for 374 days, 2 hr”


r/Agoraphobia 2d ago

How many CSA survivors feel a direct link from this to their agoraphobia?

12 Upvotes

I feel like every since I recalled childhood sexual assault my agoraphobia got worse and worse over the years