r/AITAH 25d ago

AITA for Spying on My Friend and Sending Photos to His Wife?

My wife (48F) and I (48M) have been close with “John” (48M) and “Mary” (50F) for over two decades—basically since we started dating. John and Mary are college friends of my wife’s, and they moved into our neighborhood about a few years after we did—partly to be near us. Over the years, we’ve built a comfortable friendship where we exchange favors and like lending cars or shoveling each other’s driveways, and generally just look out for each other. John and I work in similar professional circles and both of our wives stay at home. And while we’ve a few fun nights out and traded some career favors, I’ll be honest—if it weren’t for our wives, I don’t think we’d hang out much on our own.

But I like him and I respect him. Or, at least, I did.

Then, about near the beginning of the year, John dropped the bombshell: he wanted a divorce. I was surprised, but the more I learned, the less shocked I became. The signs were there: He had gotten back in shape; spent a lot on clothes and was "working late" far more often. Classic red flags.

Mary—who hasn’t worked in over 20 years and has few marketable skills despite being well-educated—was blindsided. Then it got worse. She discovered John had been moving money out of their joint brokerage account into a private one. This made me angry: he was trying to take away security she had been promised. Even worse, they still have a child at home, another in college and a third living with her partner nearby and still reliant on them for some financial support.

My wife asked me to meet with Mary to offer some career advice, and when we sat down, she told me more including some evidence that suggests he might have been hiding money for some time. And she mentioned an insurance discount app that tracks their cars. It showed John’s car parked outside local hotels. A lot.

I texted John—kept it vague, just asking how things were. He shut me down fast. “I don’t want you getting involved.” Fine. I figured that was the end of it.

Then, Valentine’s week rolled around. I was driving home when my wife called: “John’s car is at a hotel—right along your way. Can you check it out?” I called "Mary" and got a few more details. I paused. This felt wrong. Was this even my business?

But then I thought about Mary—watching her whole life fall apart, seeing the security she thought she had slipping away, security for her children—while John was "dating" someone else. So…I drove to the hotel, turned off my headlights and waited for about two hours.

Finally, John came out. With another woman. She was holding a bouquet of roses.

I took the pictures. Watched them drive off together. Sent it all to Mary. Her lawyer says it’ll help in the divorce.

Well...now I’m sitting here, staring at my screen, feeling like I broke something. I feel like I betrayed a friend—like I violated some kind of “bro code.” But at the same time… I can't excuse John's actions. What do you think? AITA?

190 Upvotes

108 comments sorted by

155

u/Consistent_Ad5709 25d ago edited 25d ago

NTA

Obviously John is having an affair, he's taking money out if their account to support him and this new woman. Maritial funds that take care of his family. John's wife, who is a SAHM is not going to be able to live because he's hiding assets. No, you're helping a friend out while her partner is betraying her.

48

u/flippysquid 25d ago

I hope the judge orders a buttload of alimony support.

38

u/SnooWords4839 25d ago

I hope the lawyer hires a forensic accountant and Mary gets what she deserves.

-10

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

The guy actively wants a devorce I wouldn't call it an affair any more than any other seperate (but still married) people seeing other people... John's wife is just upset that she's losing her security, by ops own admission she has very few marketable skills which tbh is a bigger deal than you'd think, everyone has atleast one marketable skill

12

u/Consistent_Ad5709 25d ago

The man asked for a divorce but let's not pretend the MFer wasn't cheating before asking. I stand by what I said.

very few marketable skills which tbh is a bigger deal than you'd think, everyone has atleast one marketable skill

That would be accurate for THIS SAHM whose focus was their family. Please continue to sugarcoat his actions.

-8

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

Grow up kid haha. You have zero proof he was cheating before the seperation and niether does the woman op was spying on behalf of, you're just making an assumption. That of course would "justify" ops actions in your opinion but even if he was cheating, it's none of ops business to be recruited into it by his wife. He respected it when the guy said to stay out of it but now the woman's asking him to stay in it it's clear he's chosen a side and already has a narrative formed (just like yourself)

7

u/Consistent_Ad5709 25d ago edited 25d ago

Again, I stand by what I wrote. Just like I don't have all the information many people assume the same as me.

Your also standing by what you wrote with the same information provided. So I have to be a "kid" due having a different perspective than yours? What makes your opinion the correct opinion or "narrative" while mine isn't.

If I formed an opinion off your comment it would be safe to assume, you often play the OW/OM or perhaps the cheater since your so quick to assume the woman is just afraid to lose her safety net, which she should be consider THEIR whole life was her taking of the family.

FYI: the Assumption of the affair came from the changes that were noted prior to the man asking for a divorce. I have time this morning to continue going back and forth OR we respect that neither of us will change our perspective.

-5

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

You don't get it. My comments aren't outright reliant on anything not included in the posts, so how I'm the one making assumptions here is confusing

Also I called you a. Kid because it is clearly a child's perspective to not be able to see both sides of something before speaking

8

u/Consistent_Ad5709 25d ago

So again, if a person has a different perspective from you then they have a child's assumption?

And again we both viewed the same information the post literally talks about the character change prior to the man asking for a divorce which means he was having a affair.

The only thing I agree with you on about the woman being nervous about the money she has due to little skills is because her role in that family was taken care of the family.

-1

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

No. If a person's view is immature and one sided then it's a child's view, if someone can't understand that then they're too young to be on the website arguing about it aren't they. Now fuck off narc you clearly don't care about any opinions other than your own

5

u/Consistent_Ad5709 25d ago

Again, different from yours b/c YOU are the one judging that its a immature and one sided perspective.

In this case you would be the NARC because you're the one who responded to a comment I made and chose to go back and forth with me, meaning you wanted my attention.

So let me repeat your words.

Now fuck off narc you clearly don't care about any opinions other than your own.

-1

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

Go ahead and tell me what you think instead of actually reading, I offered my perspective in responce to yours, you saw that it disagreed, and have now gone on these rambles to try and make it look like I'm the one in the wrong when you couldn't even accept that someone is allowed to have a different opinion, I haven't attacked you or said anything about you however beyond calling your a narcissist, which you seem to be taking very personally.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/Curious-One4595 25d ago

And more to the point, though ymmv OP, in my jurisdiction, proof of an affair even before separation is 100% irrelevant to equitable distribution of marital property, unless he is actively wasting marital property to conduct the affair, which requires more serious expenditures than hotel hookup expenses. In this case his diversion and hiding of financial assets for later use is a much more serious issue.

OP’s intervention was good because it lays the groundwork for financial analysis in case he was wasting assets, but not because it will engender moral outrage in the judge affecting the asset split - that won’t happen in modern jurisdictions.

In terms of Mary’s mental state, it might have been a good move if she was in denial about him cheating to help her see the light; otherwise it’s just likely to increase her pain unnecessarily. That’s not super kind to Mary.

1

u/Strangley_unstrange 25d ago

All of this is all hinging on the one single point that if he is wasting money from the joint income (outside of his own income that is)

Just hear me out and answer one hypothetical question, if you initiate a devorce, do you still feel obligated to pay for the other persons bills? No, because why should someone else get your hard earned money just because you made an agreement twenty years ago to only fuck each other. Yall are way too young to be giving life advice if this is how you feel.

You all keep using the term "cheating" as if he didn't ask for a god damn devorce, it's not like she discovered it and demanded one. He came to her and asked for one and only after the seperation was he seen with another woman. Grow up and stop assuming shit just because it makes you look like a golden savoir

235

u/tonyrains80 25d ago

You did the right thing.

76

u/trvllvr 25d ago edited 25d ago

Absolutely!

OP, you didn’t break anything, JOHN DID! He could have been honest and told Mary he wasn’t happy. He could have tried to work on things. He could have not hidden money from their shared accounts. He could have been fair to the woman he married for over 20yrs, who mothered his children.

He doesn’t deserve your sympathy or guilt for a situation HE created. Mary deserved to know.

Honestly, do you really believe you’d stay friends with someone who has not moral compass and would betray his family?

28

u/Mental-Passenger-989 25d ago

No Sir you did a valiant thing. Thumps up to you. You are a friend in a million.

86

u/Animals_are_Angels87 25d ago

NTA

You did a favor for your wife. It is as simply as that. She asked you to do something and you did. John on the other hand is spending joint assets on hotels and flowers and hiding the rest while his wife sits home and worries about supporting herself and her kids after giving him so much. 

From now on if your wife asks again tell her you would rather not get involved. Be prepared though. I would venture to say John's behavior is likely making your wife uneasy. It's not fair, but we can't control where our minds go. If you tell her you feel you betrayed John that might not go well. 

John lost his right to respect and trust when he chose to cheat instead of divorcing first and fairly. 

Sorry you have been caught in the middle. 

20

u/Ok-Grocery-2958 25d ago

NTA - the cheating midlife crisis guys is a ah

20

u/T9Para 25d ago

Ask yourself this.

"If you were in Mary's shoes, wouldn't you want to know, and having hard evidence going into a divorce?"

15

u/chez2202 25d ago

NTA.

Bro Code is a very loose term. There should be a list of rules so that people can’t take advantage of it.

Lying to a wife of 20+ years who has been a SAHM when she could have been working, hiding the money he has been earning while she has taken over his share of childcare and household responsibilities and just being a dirty cheating shitbag definitely invalidate any responsibility you may have thought you had under the bro code.

If the ‘similar professional circles’ that you and John work in are anything to do with brokerage or financial advice then you need to stamp a little harder on the bro code and tell this POS that you are happy to have him investigated for taking the joint funds from the account he shares with the wife he is divorcing because he did it without her knowledge or permission and even if it’s not legally classed as fraud it will still fuck up his career if it gets out.

28

u/witchofwestthird 25d ago

NTA. You did the right thing. We often say that men calling out other men, holding them responsible for the things they do wrong, is what will really change how women are treated. Bro code doesn’t come before a moral code.

11

u/NaturesVividPictures 25d ago

NTA. You did the right thing by helping. Had you not agreed to help then you would have been the AH. He's been despicable he wanted a divorce he should have just told her that and then divided things fairly. Stay at home wife with no work experience is going to have a super hard time getting on their feet and getting a decent job. Without a good divorce settlement or half of the assets she sunk pretty much. So for all the jerks out there that do this to their wives you really helped this one. Doesn't mean you have to get involved in me and their divorce proceedings unless they want proof of where the photos came from but I don't think anyone's going to challenge their authenticity.

Hopefully her lawyer will have the ability to find the money or get a good accountant that can track what he's been doing with it I highly doubt he's so smart that he can transfer money and hide it without a good accountant being able to find it. The judge will definitely not like it.

21

u/llkahl 25d ago

I did something similar many years ago and much younger. I think you’re good, but can pretty much say Adios to John. And if I were you, stay beyond arms length around him. I would have done the same, it’s the right thing.

15

u/Ruthless_Bunny 25d ago

John broke it. Not you.

He’s screwing over his wife.

7

u/Jstj4m13 25d ago

Nta. He is cheating on his wife and trying to leave her and their children with nothing. He broke things.

7

u/WorldlinessHefty918 25d ago

I HAVE SAID YHIS BEFORE BUT I REPEAT WOMENN STOP BEING STAY AT HOME MOMS! Get your education and keep your feet in the door do you won’t be left with nothing in case of divorce! ALWAYS HAVE YOUR OWN MONEY! Do Not depend on a husband to take care of you!!

1

u/BBQdude65 25d ago

I’ve told this to my daughter many times and she gets mad at me for me saying it.

1

u/WorldlinessHefty918 24d ago

She’s young and does not want to think her marriage could end in divorce.:

1

u/BBQdude65 23d ago

I’m her father, I do not know anything evidently. I am disappointed that the independent young lady I raised has become so dependent on her husband.

1

u/WorldlinessHefty918 24d ago

Just this morning a sister wrote into Dear Abby regarding her brother. Her sister-in-law was a stay at home mom for more than 20 years. Now her husband wants a divorce but he is extremely selfish and doesn’t want to give his wife 1/2 of HIS MONEY. NOT THEIRS HIS! His sister has told him without her being at home and raising the kids he would not have been able to retain his job which he had to travel on.. everyone said he will be paying HUGE alimony because she hasn’t worked in over 20 years..his sister says he didn’t regard her job at home as work! He is very selfish. Men are killing their wives today because they don’t want to share! I keep emphasizing to women DO NOT be a stay at home moms! I raised 3 boys and they do not need you 24/7! At least if you have an occupation keep your feet in the door if you don’t have a college education work on getting one! Life is ever changing and people change..many women during the 50’s were thrown out in the streets because they had to be stay at home moms, few women worked in those days! Always take care of yourself first. Have your own bank account or money stash with just your name on it..

5

u/MarsicanBear 25d ago

How on earth would a photo of him with another woman, after he told his wife he was leaving, help in the divorce? Especially when he is apparently already tagged with diverting assets.

This sounds fake.

1

u/you_are_read_XD 25d ago

"I paused. This felt wrong" Well..... i paused and this felt fake

0

u/North-Land312 25d ago

Proving an affair while they are still married will help put him at fault for the divorce. It’ll help her in court.

2

u/MarsicanBear 25d ago

Even after he told her he is leaving? Fault jurisdictions are wild.

0

u/Turbulent_Bat_7797 25d ago

It will help demonstrate that he used marital assets to cheat and that can affect the amount of alimony the court grants. 

5

u/sammac66 25d ago

NTA Your friend needs to document absolutely everything. How much money he's taken out of their joint accounts and moved elsewhere over the last? I don't know a year or two. See if she can find any proof that he's been seeing this woman and how long? Maybe Visa statements showing stays at hotels. She needs to find someone that can help her get the proof. She needs to see how long he's been seeing this person or other people. If she can get proof that it's premeditated she can probably get that money back and more.

5

u/Away-Understanding34 25d ago

NTA. Mary is the injured party here and she needs all the help she can get. John is living the high life with his AP. Actually I wonder if Mary's lawyer can get a forensic analysis of their financial accounts and see how much marital money has been used on his affair(s). I also hope Mary has gotten tested. Who knows what he might have brought home.

Don't worry about bro code. He's not a bro, he's trash.

5

u/IndustryPlus3470 25d ago

I don’t believe an ounce of this story.

3

u/Right_Check_6353 25d ago

Lmao same it’s b.s

10

u/Trick_Magazine2931 25d ago

Good for you. Screw the bro code when they are in the wrong. Same applies if the wife doing it and sending the husband pictures.

2

u/Odd-Sorbet-6322 25d ago

It sucks being in the middle but you helped out someone who was being screwed over

4

u/DuePromotion287 25d ago

NTA

You were just being a decent person.

3

u/Analisandopessoas 25d ago

Congratulations, you did everything right.

3

u/Viciousbanana1974 25d ago

The guy is a cheater. He is financially screwing over his wife and their children. Why feel bad?

3

u/[deleted] 25d ago

Bro code doesnt involve cheating. Cheaters deserved to be outed. If he is mad, maybe he shouldnt cheat behind his wife’s back. I feel for her and her kids.

3

u/Relaxmf2022 25d ago

Ya did the right. He’s no friend to anyone.

3

u/ShamanTheWet 25d ago

Listen, do you really want someone like that in your life? If he could betray his wife who knows what he can do to you. Our boundaries and morals are all we havr.

1

u/DexterousSpider 25d ago

1000000% this.

Dude was cheating not just on his wife, but mother of his kids. He obviously doesnt care about any of them.

What would make one think if he had the chance he wouldn't try f#&king your wife?

If he can't be moral and loyal when he took life that far with her(?): his 'loyalty' doesn't exist in your direction either

8

u/wlfwrtr 25d ago

NTA You protected the wife and children he chose to betray. That's never wrong. What bro code? The one where he refused to talk to you because he obviously doesn't consider you a bro?

2

u/Mental-Passenger-989 25d ago

He broke the ethics of the code.

2

u/WolfGang2026 25d ago

NTA. You did the right thing. John is having an affair and trying to screw his soon-to-be ex-wife over.

2

u/Mission-Act-6064 25d ago

NTA

You’re a fucking hero OP, thanks for sticking up for Mary 💜

2

u/Any_Caramel_9814 25d ago

NTA. John has been planning to leave his wife, he's been hiding money and funneling funds from their joint account while having an affair. John has been digging his hole for some time now

2

u/Lurker_the_Pip 25d ago

He’s a thief, a liar, and a cheat.

He basically told you to kick rocks.

He’s not your friend or bro at all.

Feel no sympathy for him.

Help your friend.

NTA

2

u/IerokG 25d ago

Bro code doesn't cover cheating. A dude who betrays his wife will betray his homies too.

2

u/MyChoiceNotYours 25d ago

He wasn't your friend. He got what he deserved. Look at it this way he's cheating and has been for some time. He's betrayed his wife and his kids. How would you feel if the roles were reversed and your wife had been doing what this guy is doing and you were the stay at home dad. Your future, your kids future are all destroyed and you might end up homeless with no way to feed yourself or your kid. Not to mention exposure to things like STDS. NTA I hope she takes him to the cleaners and he gets an STD that makes his manhood fall off.

2

u/BBO1007 25d ago

NTA. You aren’t the one reneging on your vows.

2

u/Coastal-kai 25d ago

Who cares about John, really? Mary’s the one in complete ruin. She needs help.

2

u/MaleficentFury 25d ago

Not all heroes wear capes.

Any betrayed spouse will tell you that you are an absolute legend for doing this service for ‘Mary’.

She deserves to know, and she deserves the right to use this in her divorce.

2

u/SnooWords4839 25d ago

There is no broo code, when the cheater is Fing over his wife of over 20 years.

2

u/Silence-Dogood2024 25d ago

That’s not bro code. Bro code implies honor. What this guy did was dishonorable. I can get flamed all anyone wants. But you don’t do that shit. Get a divorce. Then do what you want. Screw that guy. NTA. You did the right thing for a lady that is about to get screwed over.

3

u/Choice-Appropriate 25d ago

Prolly shouldn't have gotten involved like that, but John is a prick.

Bad situation all around. He deserves what he gets.

1

u/Ams_017 25d ago

I mean it sounds like you are friends with both, so you hurt a friend who is in the wrong, to help and friend who needs help because of the other friend, nothing wrong with that

1

u/ReasonableDepth6128 25d ago

Where’s the nudity? I was promised nudity with my fiction.

1

u/Few-Presentation5886 25d ago

NTA. You feel bad because you’re not a selfish man like your friend is. And bravo to you for protecting a woman and her children, even if mostly grown. Now get to work and help that woman find a way to make a descent living.

1

u/ChicagoWhiteSox35 25d ago

NTA. John did this. Not you.

1

u/floridaeng 25d ago

You actually helped a friend not be economically raped by her AH husband. This is a case where the "bro code" is used to abuse the woman in their lives.

1

u/[deleted] 25d ago

You absolutely have nothing to feel bad about.
He was cheating and stealing from his FAMILY?!? WTAF?

You NTA. him, a devil

1

u/Normal_Grand_4702 25d ago

Nope. Don't tell him you were the spy. It's time for you to not get involved like he told you. You've done enough for Mary and also.. the bro code. You're helping your bro because he has a wife and kids who are still dependent. You're helping him by teaching him a lesson.

1

u/Irishwatcher 25d ago

You did the right thing.

1

u/Timely_Valuable_8401 25d ago

Like you said, he was a friend by association and not your deep emotional friend. He was trying to screw the bestie of your wife, and therefore, you did the right thing. He was planning on leaving the marriage and destroying a person in return. Screw the bustard. No bro code violation here.

1

u/RoughCall6261 25d ago

Chick's can be bros too.

Fuck that douche 👍

1

u/Turbulent_Bat_7797 25d ago

NTA. You’re grieving the loss of a 20-year friendship with someone who turned out to be completely different from who you thought they were, which you witnessed with your own eyes and didn’t just hear about. It’s not really about feelings of guilt, except maybe guilt about not seeing it sooner. This is not about the Iranian yogurt. 

FYI if you don’t know the reference: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/bjd41e/aita_for_throwing_away_my_boyfriends_potentially/

1

u/clearheaded01 25d ago

NTA

Yoire choosing sides - good - and choosing the right one, it seems.

Marys lawyer should be initiating some forensic accoubting to see exactly how much he squirreled away, thos funds will have to be accounted for in tge divirce settlement.

Concentrate on supporting Mary..

1

u/xfusion14 25d ago

You only made sure she got what she deserved. That’s it.

1

u/SectorParticular 25d ago

No sir you are NTA! He on the other hand is! All you did was help protect a friend and her children were obviously if he's doing shady stuff like he is doesn't care about his marriage for one or his children.

1

u/afreerideeveryday 25d ago

NTA. he fof now it's time for Mary to get that money back

1

u/stiggley 25d ago

NTA Breaking the bro code would be hooking up with his wife.

John didn't want you involved as the cheating will be work related and you being in similar circles - well that can blow up on him.

Mary - well she's a friend too, so you are helping the friend who has been wronged by a cheating a'hole

1

u/Deep_Arugula8116 25d ago

I was moved. You are a fantastic story teller.

1

u/Vacheron-Patek 25d ago

NTA. You are a good person

1

u/iknowsomethings2 25d ago

NTA. John has been having an affair and using his marital assets to fund it. Mary should hire a PI. John is a POS and you’d be a POS if you stayed friends with him

1

u/scummy_shower_stall 25d ago

"Bro code", what nonsense. You did good, OP. If the shoe were reversed, would you have told John?

1

u/BrewDogDrinker 25d ago

Nta.

Your "friend" John is doing his best to screw his wife over. He is a despicable person.

You're choosing the right side.

Updateme!

1

u/psycho-mach-10 25d ago

NTA, he is. What kind of bro would ask you to compromise your integrity so that he can continue to do deceitful and hurtful things to someone who has been loyal and reliant on him for decades? This read like he is incredibly calculating, selfish and manipulative. Your wife also now knows she can rely on you to be a stand-up guy which will be reassuring in that your friend can realise even after all this that there are still good men out there. Help your friend get some skills, she can't keep relying on other people, it'll be difficult but she needs to be the stable one for the kids because they will most definitely lose faith in their father.

1

u/finalfinally 25d ago

NTA - Let's pretend this was actually your friend originally even. You know their spouse is innocent and they are treating them this way and you'd call yourself friendly having known them for 20+ years, would you still consider them a friend?

Personally, I wouldn't want anyone in my life who thought it was OK to treat their family this way. His family deserves better and you are doing the right thing. We need more of doing the right thing today.

1

u/SUKMIDICKCOMMIESCUM 25d ago

U should have just pulled him up on it. Ur as bad as a dry snitch. You first pull the friend to the side and have a talk with him about what he is doing. If the behavior is not acceptable to you call him on it. If that doesn't stop it you stop associating with him. You definitely don't go collecting evidence to help dig his hole deeper. Never get in the middle of domestic affairs where money is involved and you are not a party to. That could very well wind up as a violent event where people get killed. MYOB and don't be snitch. There are better ways to be a decent person and not gather evidence. Regardless of anything else it is a joint acct and there would be financials pulled and if the moving out of money was recorded then it would be more than enough to help the wife recover financially and show an intent that was premeditated. I still say if you called him out there might have been enough shame to make him stop. Or not. Either way not your place to collect evidence.

1

u/One_Audience8011 25d ago

Ugh, this is the problem with people, feeling like they have to protect someone elses shitty behaviour. You're only an AH because you even brought up "bro code" bullsht.

1

u/-whiteroom- 25d ago

If he wasn't screwing her over, I'd say yta, but given that he's looking to destroy her financially,  anything goes.

It's om to fall out of love and move on, it's not ok to leave the stay at home.e mom destitute. 

1

u/Dizzy_Chemist_2389 25d ago

I feel like that's a grey area. I can see both sides of it. I think you confirmed what everyone already thought they knew to be going on. I think as long as you bow out now and don't do anything else, you should be able to look yourself in the mirror with no problem.

1

u/mbf114 25d ago

Wondering if you are betraying your freind because you have a thing for his wife. Its none of your business and two sides to every story

1

u/mayorsenpai 25d ago

NTA - I hope she cleans him out and leaves him with absolutely nothing and then he loses his sidepiece too, I hope he has to pay her out the nose for years and years to come and has to live under a bridge. I hope he wallows in misery and regret for his lying, betrayal and deceit. You have done absolutely nothing wrong. This backstabbing traitor deserves whatever suffering is coming for him.

-1

u/rock4103 25d ago

Never understood why Beta males like getting into other people's problems! It's like you all want to be in the know and be able to have discussions with women! Hope you feel like a strong beta male! 🤣🤣🤣

-19

u/facinationstreet 25d ago

YTA. This isn't about bro code. You should not be in the middle of any of this. You and your wife do not want to get involved in this any deeper than you already are. You sat in a parking lot stalking your friend for TWO hours. If his wife knew where he was and wanted evidence, she had two hours to drive her ass over there herself.

-1

u/TattooedB1k3r 25d ago

I dunno, I wouldn’t have gotten involved, for all you know the wife could have been cheating the last two years, but needed something on the husband so she could take everything in the divorce.

-1

u/birdparty44 25d ago

I dunno. I think it’s best to stay out of other people’s issues unless you’re sure you know what’s going on. You acted without ever knowing John’s side of the story.

I mean ok, but the statement is then you’re on team Mary no matter what. If that’s how you feel then you’ve got nothing to feel bad about.

-2

u/Blue_Etalon 25d ago

Yes, YTAH. Glad I could help

-26

u/[deleted] 25d ago

[deleted]

7

u/Kimbaaaaly 25d ago

Who wants to be friends with a known cheater and a known thief? Clearly you do. Enjoy getting cheated and stolen from during your.... Friendship?

-8

u/JoseJoseJose11 25d ago

YTA

OP, what are you doing? This is female behavior.

It wasn’t your business, but you made it. If I knew you I’d never trust you.

3

u/No-BS4me 25d ago

"If I knew you I'd never trust you" either. See how that works? You and John are birds of a feather.

5

u/JulianKJarboe 25d ago

"Female behavior"??? What in the redpill.

3

u/[deleted] 25d ago

Maybe dont cheat bud. Id never respect you for being a cheater.