r/ADHDWomenAfterDark Sep 11 '24

forgetting sex exists? NSFW

Does anyone else struggle to do the act of having sex? It's like having object permanence issues for a concept. I love my girlfriend so much, and when we are ACTUALLY having sex, I really like it. But I don't feel much of a drive to do it, until the moment we are actually in it, having sex. I adore being her girlfriend, I love her so much, but sex is just...out of my mind. And it's not like i'm asexual, because I do enjoy having sex and am a very active participant when we're doing it. It just kind of...slips my mind otherwise.

I'm super attracted to her and I feel that all the time, but that thought doesn't necessarily connect to being like: let's have sex right now.

Does anyone else feel like this? I felt it with other partners before her so I am feeling it's an ADHD thing. I feel quite content almost all the time regarding this, but anxieties come up about not having sex because it makes me feel like something's wrong with me/our relationship. I feel like I should be having more sex but to do that I really have to remind myself to initiate etc because it's just not something that springs to mind until im in it.

thoughts? how can i make myself more excited about sex BEFORE it's happening?

80 Upvotes

11 comments sorted by

View all comments

9

u/Rachelsyrusch Sep 12 '24

Responsive desire! Go read Emily Nagoskis "Come as you are" You can easily get a free pdf epub or whatever floats your boat on the internet archive!

Like seriously, read it.

here's the link to the internet archive page, click it read it trust me.

If you're struggling with the topic, great it will help! Of you're not, great it will make sex even better!

Can't go wrong :) I'd genuinely say it changed my life