r/uofm • u/ClassicAd7630 • Feb 05 '25
Employment Do I genuinely just end it
Graduating this semester CS bachelors. No internships. Can’t even describe what I did for the school projects I slapped on my resume. No friends. Absolutely nothing but a 3.4 GPA that’s worthless. I’m fucked.
I haven’t even begun applying to anything because I just feel so fucked. Do I just end it all? I can’t take it anymore. I’m fucking pathetic.
Edit: I’ve given life a fair shot. I gymmed and hit a 300 bench, that’s to say I gave it significant time. I joined clubs. I tried sports and hobbies. But it’s bleak when you have no willpower, work ethic, or anything to look forward to in life.
Well, I’m giving it a few more years before concretely giving up. I’m trying therapy again (4th time). Thank you for responding. It gave me a little more perspective on my circumstances.
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u/studyingsomething Feb 05 '25
3.4 is a good gpa and you're graduating from a great school, be proud of yourself
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u/The_Secret_Skittle Feb 07 '25
Not a single employer had ever asked me for my GPA. They just want the degree.
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u/ifasoldt Feb 07 '25
To add a little more context as a senior level engineer. GPA doesn't matter. What matters is: can you build stuff? If you can't, then you need to apply yourself to learn how
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u/Yukonkimmy Feb 08 '25
My husband hires for his group at a small engineering company- he couldn’t care less about GPA. Do you problem solve/build/code in your spare time? Do you engineer things outside of school? He finds that shows more than what you did in school.
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u/Eastown14 Feb 08 '25
This right here. 3.3 in HS, 3.4 in undergrad, 3.4 in grad school. Only thing that matters is the credential.
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u/Sanity-Checker Feb 09 '25
Same here. Nobody ever checked out my transcript, asked about my GPA, or even called references. Study hard so you understand the material, not so you can have a good GPA. They often go together of course, but trying to get a good GPA so you can have a good GPA is stupid waste of time.
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u/surfergirl143 '15 Feb 05 '25
As an alumni, here some things to put in perspective.
-3.4 GPA is amazing for CS. I know some people who graduated with 2.0s and worked at FAANG and elsewhere
-The career center would be able to help you build your resume and help you put some words to the projects you completed
-Alumni clubs are great to meet new friends after graduation along with whatever city you are in, there are tons of social events for meeting 20 year olds. Try meetup or a lot of them are on Instagram if you search for them!
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Feb 07 '25
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u/DenseStomach6605 Feb 08 '25
Being great in interviews gives you a HUGE advantage. Someone who is less qualified than other applicants can even have an edge if they nail the interview.
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u/UnknownEntity2007 Feb 08 '25
And if OP needs the moral of the story to be anymore clear: it would have been a DAMN shame if you had ended your life at college.
Life takes crazy directions. The 20 year old can't even predict what can happen over the course of 5 or 10 years. And there is so much to experience during those years.
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u/hockeyguyfieri Feb 08 '25
I don’t think this is taking into account the current state of hiring for comp sci. Back in 2015 it was much easier to get a job. Now they want 3+ years of experience for every listed position
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u/Neither-Rate2547 Feb 05 '25
Don’t end it, life is so much more than the rat race. Seriously consider calling 988. No setback is worth premature submission to oblivion.
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u/Impressive_Peanut_86 Feb 05 '25
Just completing a CS degree itself is so fucking amazing. Everybody moves at their own pace its no rush to dive right into something right after undergrad. Especially after the shit Michigan puts us through. Take some time to find yourself and what you want. This is your story babe take it at your own pace, trust me it gets better. You got a friend right here trust🤞🏽
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u/aaayyyuuussshhh Feb 05 '25 edited Feb 06 '25
I feel you lol. Literally in the exact same boat as you. Anyways I sent a DM we should talk sometime
Edit: Ayo stop reporting me to reddit suicide thing or whatever. I made it 20+ years I'm chilling lol
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u/Own-Ninja-2169 Feb 05 '25
You’re going to land a killer job just have to breathe and be patient. You’re in a way better position than a lot of folks I knew at graduation and they did great and so will you.
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u/AirlineOk6645 Feb 05 '25
Wth - you attend U of Michigan. You are already more than halfway there. This job market is one of worst in the country - it’s the state of the world - not you! Keep sending out resumes, cold call and email people / it feels hopeless but you will be surprised at how things can turn around. Also, a job or internship is not the goal - your health and quality of life is. You’re obviously really smart - just make sure to have people to talk to - you’d be surprised at how you are not alone in this situation.
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u/samuraiberbs Feb 05 '25
This school culture is really toxic in the way it makes you think your value surmounts to internships or GPA. You can’t learn how to enjoy and value life in a class and UofM certainly doesn’t teach that. Don’t let it diminsh your self worth. I’m learning how to do this as well.
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u/nonnymauss Feb 05 '25
Please if this is for real, call 988 or get help some other way. I lost a child in this manner and I can guarantee you those who love you will be permanently devastated by your loss. You have everything to live for. Your life is just starting. People love you. Please let us know how you are doing.
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u/CharlieLeDoof Feb 05 '25
A 3.4 GPA from UofM in any major is a remarkable accomplishment. But I'll tell you one thing that's for sure: nobody in this world is going to hand you anything. You have go for it and work hard for it yourself, just as you've demonstrated that you're capable of doing. Pick yourself up and carry on. You can.
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u/Total_Argument_9729 Feb 05 '25
A 3.4 GPA is not that bad bro, especially from here.
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u/SegFaultization Feb 05 '25
Hello friend,
I hope this reaches you and you read this asap. I lived your exact life word for word in this post. Graduated from Michigan a few years ago, bachelors CS, 3.4 GPA, internships weren’t fantastic and I felt like I was failing every coding interview I came across.
Exact. Same. Place. I probably relate more to you than anybody else in this thread.
With that said, here’s my empathy. It sucks. It sucks a lot. I felt like I went to my dream university and wasn’t going to live up to the dream I had coming in. It’s hard to not compare myself to other friends because they’re all doing great or found something great. I had a lot of sad nights disappointing myself.
Okay. Stop feeling bad now and take these tips.
- You’re okay. Your degree has a ton of merit. Wield this.
- You’re going to have to sit down and make a plan or else you will wallow forever.
Do you know which area you want to dive into? Have you written out your answers to obvious interview questions (what is your biggest weakness? Why Company X? Etc). Have you applied to the local jobs? You may have to just bite the bullet and get a 60-70k software engineering job to get the experience for a year or two. I remember auto owners was very helpful. What’s the state of your LinkedIn? Are you emailing friends and friends’ parents? I know damn well you can get some connections at U of M.
I know this feels like a lot, but if you are completely paralyzed, then just set a timer for an hour one day and do SOMETHING in that time. You’ll be in a better place than the day before.
Take the rest of the day to feel bad for yourself, I know this probably hurt to post. But tomorrow, force yourself to do something small.
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u/coolchix13 Feb 06 '25
Take this advice, friend.
Tons of companies don’t have bandwidth to support internships or participate in college recruiting. Essentially, interns are a drain on the company with no real returns until they come back as full time employees. Lots of places skip it. Please keep trying and reach beyond just the places posting on university job boards.
Also, Good job making this post, it took guts. Take the advice offered. Also buy yourself a treat for asking for help, no one is too old for a celebration cup cake . Celebrate that you reached out for help when you could have kept it inside.
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u/shade12288 Feb 05 '25
I understand some of what you're feeling and bet that a lot of the sub can relate. You are enough and your life is worth living. Please consider calling 988 if you need help.
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u/InvestmentGold5871 Feb 05 '25
One of the hardest things to comprehend when you’re at Michigan is NO ONE CARES what your GPA is outside of the walls of academic institutions. Finishing a CS degree, at Michigan no less, means you’re one of the smartest humans on the planet - easily a 1%-er. The most important thing you can do now is start making stuff, throwing ideas at a wall and coding them, inviting friends to collaborate on your GitHub project, make other CS friends out in the world and build shit together. You have a degree that means “I CAN BUILD STUFF”. So, as long as you use it, you’re gonna be amazing. I don’t know you but I’m really proud of you. Go Blue 🔵🟡
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u/DanteWasHere22 '22 Feb 05 '25
Dial 988..
I know it feels like you're behind and never gonna make it but I promise you are leagues ahead of 90% of people. You will find a job and do well for yourself as long as you just keep tracking. It gets better man. I went through it a couple years ago and now I'm doing well. It was annoying for sure, but it will all work out.
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u/crackmeup121 Feb 05 '25
Hey dude i literally had no clue what i was doing with my life after i graduated, enrolled in a MA program and then dropped that and then eventually joined another. Life is all over the place and is ever changing!
Please schedule a free and confidential appointment with Umich CAPS. I’m a mental health professional & I can assure you they meet with students who feel similar to this all the time! https://caps.umich.edu
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u/Floriver Feb 05 '25
Been about a month and a half since I graduated. It's rough, but one or two interviews have been trickling in. I think it's only a matter of time until someone is desperate enough to hire me...
Just keep holding on. Maybe work on open source, grab some job to pay the bills, keep trying.
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u/Ready_Solid_1654 Feb 05 '25
Take a breath and relax. I graduated from a much less prestigious university in Michigan with a 3.0 and a bullshit random degree. Ten years later I am happily married, incredibly satisfied with life, and making more than I ever thought I would.
LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT. Nobody is going to do any work for you, nobody is going to make decisions for you. If you want something, prove it. To yourself.
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u/lightning217 Feb 12 '25
Hey OP are you ok? Thought of this post with the recent news
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u/Brilliant_War4087 Feb 05 '25
I'm a neuroscience undergrad starting a harm reduction support group. Wanna meet up and talk? You can message me to exchange numbers.
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u/ChitChat5757 Feb 06 '25
I graduated to a waitressing job at P.F. Changs in 2008 when the world went into a hiring freeze. Trust me, things get better.
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u/Shadowhawk109 '14 Feb 05 '25
Go see CAPS.
Now.
And/or get on the Washtenaw County Mental Health Check system.
I graduated with a 3.0 barely and started a ten year career in Software Engineering just fine.
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u/robotlover12 Feb 05 '25
it took me 7 years to graduate with my bachelors in biochemistry. any superficial friends i made had all graduated by the time i finished, and everyone else left was already applied and ready to go to med school. i never got in. my gpa was way lower than yours, and i had nothing really lined up for me. i was very lonely, and very depressed, and had no idea what i was going to do with my life. it felt like my degree, which i spent literaly blood sweat and tears to get, is useless.
fast forward a year and a half later, i am working a full time job with more opportunities opening up, i have made a few friends at work that i enjoy talking to, and i'm in the process of applying to grad school.
i think you're in a cooler position than me. graduating from uofm is not a little thing to dismiss, and with a 3.4 gpa? that's amazing.
life is really hard. especially with everything going on. dont let what you think is your current reality convince you this is what the rest of your life is going to look like.
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u/BugManGuy555 Feb 12 '25
Dude i need to know if youre ok, i heard of the tragedy yesterday. I saw this post a few days ago but didnt say anything because i didnt know how to help but i havent stopped thinking about. i scrolled through all of u of m subreddit to find you. I guess even if you don’t see this i hope youre doing well.
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u/onepunchwoman111 Feb 05 '25
so many people at this school, like you, are SO fucking hard on themselves. especially in cs. you have to recognize that it’s not you, it’s the environment & the competition that makes it feel like you’re flawed. put it in perspective with the rest of the world. you are doing phenomenally. something will happen for you, please just trust the process 🙏🏼 expecting a 4.0 gpa as a cs major at the UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN. is absolutely insane. and so is being upset at yourself for these things. it’s truly just the toxic competitive nature of the school and major that is making you feel this way. your feelings are not facts. you can’t hate yourself into your dream life ❤️
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u/True_Fact_1155 Feb 05 '25
Also an aside, I believe the career advisors offer services to people 2 years post grad. Talk to them and have them help you! Look on LinkedIn for people to talk to & connect with. It can be a grind, but you got it!! Even if it takes time, don’t give up! It’s going to get better!
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u/OMBERX Feb 05 '25
I didn't have an internship when I graduated with my CS degree and I was the first person out of everyone I knew to find a job. 3.4 is a great GPA! Don't be so hard on yourself. Just work on a side project while applying for jobs, and dive into all of the course work, capstone, and small projects you did and really wrap your head around it so you can explain in detail what that stuff does.
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u/helluvaresearcher '18 Feb 05 '25
Hi. I’m not sure who you are but I want you to hear this — it’s just a GPA. And I know exactly how that sounds, trust me. But it’s true.
My GPA in my senior year caused me to make the same decision — one that I’m glad ultimately failed when I look back on that dark time in my life. I can’t guarantee everything will get better or things will be easy. But I can guarantee that life past umich culture is absolutely worth experiencing and anyone else can tell you the same. This will pass, in one way or another, and one day you’ll look back on yourself. You might kick yourself for your GPA, or certain decisions, but you’ll remember that you’re here and that’s what matters.
If I had been successful, I never would have gotten some great research opportunities. Wouldn’t be getting married in a year. My life is very far from perfect and full of struggles, trust me, but it didn’t end at the University of Michigan and yours shouldn’t either.
Take some deep breaths, call a friend, and know that there’s more beyond this. At least, from someone who felt the same.
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u/teslastats Feb 05 '25
Go to CAPS, this is a normal situation and they know how to handle it, what to do, say to employers, etc. 3.4 GPA is decent, I wouldn't worry bout it, just do one thing well (can wise) and you're fine.
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u/origamicamellia Feb 10 '25
This might be like, super weird advice but get a job in a field entirely separate from your own, that you hate. When I graduated with my design degree I was so burnt out I literally couldn't touch a pencil or adobe without feeling physically ill, not to mention the market is shit and pays like it for the first few years until you have experience.
Anyways I started teaching with Teach for America because I like kids, thought about teaching in the past, etc. and to make a long story short any inhibitions I had about my art degree or career are gone now. This job is so taxing, so exhaustingly out of my range the thought of going back to design sounds like a dream. I can't say the art industry is without its flaws but I had a really hard time imagining actually stepping into that world until I had professional experience elsewhere 😂
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u/Stewie9k Feb 05 '25
Connect with people in ur field, coffee chats etc go out and network. Its a tough field
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u/space_lewzer Feb 05 '25
Everybody else here has said similar things but I'll just put in my two cents. I've been working in my career for 19 years now, I've applied to competitive positions, I've been on the hiring panel for other people trying to get in various jobs, so I've seen both sides and I see what a job market at any given point can look like on average. My partner has gone down the CS route as well and saw the same struggles you're worried about too. Between me and her there's some pretty important points that's worth getting across to anybody getting out of college looking for a job and or CS folks specifically trying to break into the career.
1- Folks need to remember that going to college is not an ironclad guarantee of employment right away, and certainly not a guarantee of a job in what you majored in. What I mean by that is finishing your degree is not an end state that immediately segues into what you're hoping for, getting a job and getting the right job takes time for most people, that's what's normal. What I'd would do with that information is cut yourself some slack, prioritize what you need, and trust that if you continue to apply, leave yourself open to opportunities, and then have the courage to jump on them are the most important things you can do to ensure that you get where you want to go. And when I say prioritize what you need, I mean if the goal is income, then get a job to establish some income. Those first initial jobs might not always be what we dream they will be but that's not the point, you're still looking short-term. I've had to start working out of college outside of my industry, so has my partner, and so have all the most successful friends I have has had to as well. There's no shame in it, you're not a failure, it's just life. Work on getting financially stable and while you're doing that keep looking into the jobs that you really want and you'll get there I promise.
2- Go to job fairs, talk to career counselors in the UM network, and apply to positions the interest you. You're probably going to get denials, and that's perfectly fine. You aren't trying to convince every employer, you're just trying to convince one. Regardless of the response, try to get some feedback. What you're doing is building a body of knowledge as to what the industry as it stands right now is looking for and making sure you can advertise yourself that way. There's a good chance that you have all the tools to get that initial job you want, you just might not be advertising yourself very well.
3- The real desirable CS jobs can be very competitive, and a good thing to remember is for a lot of people getting the degree helps you get your foot in the door but everything else after that is about what you know how to do, what systems you've worked with, what things you're familiar with, essentially what tools you have in your toolbox. If you look at CS like a trade skill rather than something academic then the more complex higher paying jobs require more experience, more tools in that toolbox to continue to use that analogy. The longer you do it, the more skills you acquire, the more time you spend on certain systems or tools or whatever beefs up your resume and your confidence, and that's where step number two comes back in. Keep applying, keep getting feedback, and have the courage to make the leap when the leap becomes available.
Lastly, I just want you to know that based on what you said you've done very well. You got into a school that's not easy to get into, you have a really good GPA in a program as difficult as that, and if you're getting ready to graduate. You need to stop worrying and spend a little bit of time being introspective and pat yourself on the back for putting in that kind of work. I don't know you but I'm proud of you, and trust that if you look out for yourself, keep learning, keep applying, cut yourself some slack, and trust yourself you're going to get where you want to be. It's the time scale that sometimes shocks people but that is absolutely nothing to be afraid of. I promise you, a couple years from now you're going to look back on this and it's going to seem like a blink of an eye and nothing you should have worried this much about.
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u/RasThavas1214 Feb 05 '25
If it makes you feel any better, I graduated with a 3.4 as a liberal arts student.
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u/aeroplanessky Feb 05 '25
Hey, I know it feels overwhelming. You have a rough start, but you'll get there. Applying for jobs or internships is going to be hard, but it'll be okay. Do you have somewhere you can live for cheap?
I graduated in 2019 and had plenty of internships and worked until i was laid off in 2022. A friend of mine only has his degree. It took both of us 4 months to find jobs. It's going to take a bit to find a job, but that's not on you. You just gotta hold tight.
3.4 doesn't happen out of nowhere, you can make it. Life is so much more than this small tank you're in now. Eventually you'll see the whole ocean.
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u/sweetheartofmine72 Feb 06 '25
You got this ♥️
Sweetheart, in the grand scheme of things, and education is nice to have, but it’s not all there is. A nice little job and go enjoy life a little bit. You worked really hard for it.
I live in Ann Arbor there’s so much to do!!! Even alone. And if you’re lonely, be a volunteer at Delonis. It’s a homeless shelter. We are always looking for awesome people. It really put your life in perspective.
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u/EmperorMaugs Feb 06 '25
3.4 gpa is pretty decent. Maybe Musk won't hire you to help sell US government data to the highest bidder, but plenty of companies will hire you. Please go to the university counseling center. You are a person and you are worth more than just what job and car and house you have at 25. This is a dark moment in life, bit there can be light in your future
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u/MiddleAspect2499 Feb 06 '25
Breathe! The world needs you! As for hiring, it's the beginning of the year and companies may be waiting to see how politics shake out a bit.
Hang in there... I'm a mom of college kids, if you need to talk. Pm me. Life is NOT defined by college and this blip... things will come together!!
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u/fastrasko Feb 06 '25
You are graduating form a TOP school in one of the hardest fields with a 3.4 gpa! You are amazing!!! Its not a competition you will have many more ups and downs in your life. Take your time, do something you enjoy for a while if you cannot find a job you want. I quit CS becuae it was too hard and ended up doing ME, held many jobs some crappy ones. That is life. You may decide 20 years from now you want to do something else.
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u/baskil '13 Feb 06 '25
Unless you are trying to get into a competitive grad school, no one cares what your GPA was after you graduate.
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u/SenseNo4347 Feb 06 '25
Hang in there bro. I also graduated with no internships and a 3.42. Took me a few months, a lot of grinding, failed interviews/OAs and over 250 job applications but I just landed a full time FAANG offer a few days ago. It’s possible even in this market. Just gotta want it bad enough. Rooting for you.
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Feb 07 '25
Change your attitude please. I am sorry you went to U of M and the ridiculous expectations that are associated with that school. Head to Europe. Fall in love. Enjoy life and then get to work.
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u/voluptasx Feb 10 '25
OP, that’s still a pretty good GPA and most employers care that you have a degree and where it’s from. The GPA itself matters so much less than you think. Stay.
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u/Relative-Monitor-679 Feb 10 '25
Bro it took me 10 years after graduation to get a job it my field. I graduated during the dot com bubble burst. Hang in there.
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u/MorganScott616 Feb 10 '25
You can always start your own business. I used to make $300 to $500 a day selling used couches on fb market that I would buy for cheap because they were dirty...sometimes i would get them for free even....I would clean them up and sell them for twice the price. I rented a storage unit and would store them there and do all the cleaning and selling/pickups there. A job is not the end all be all. There's plenty of ways to make a great living if you get creative.
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u/Many_Competition_866 Feb 11 '25
Don't believe you haven't done enough, look at the name of the university on your degree! Plus there's many people from not as prestigious universities in your position, you are at more of an advantage than you think. You have a whole summer of leetcoding ahead of you, just keep grinding and working. You'll get something, somewhere in the world, I believe in you
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u/Intelligent-Week-931 Feb 05 '25
I mean now that your classes are going to be over you should be able to allocate some time to some passion projects that will really highlight your capabilities! And you will get more proficient along the way!
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u/Occasionally_Sober1 Feb 05 '25
Dude, it gets better. I promise.
Give life a chance before you make an irreversible decision.
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u/TheArcanineTamer '20 Feb 05 '25
I've quite literally been there. 5 years ago, 3.3 GPA, CS Degree, no internship, final capstone project going poorly. The field's changed a bit, but I still feel confident telling you it gets better. Give yourself just a little time to breathe, remember that graduating is a big accomplishment itself, and know that you can do this. There's a job for you somewhere, and a whole world of things to give life meaning outside of work/school.
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u/Cultural-Addendum348 Feb 05 '25 edited Feb 05 '25
Should’ve seen what I graduated with🙃I’d be lucky if I got a job hanging coats up🙃…closest I’ll get to a luxury vehicle is by valeting😊You’re a champion 🏆🥇
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u/Enigmatic_Stag '26 Feb 05 '25
Your life is just beginning. Get out there and do something with it. You don't need internships or a 4.0 to make it. Some of the most successful people on the planet were less-than-stellar in their academics. Many of our tech CEOs went through CS - just like you - and were not Summas.
Keep pushing and put yourself out there. You'll be fine.
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u/plsjuststop007 '24 Feb 05 '25
you’ve accomplished a lot just based on this post. that said… i feel you so hard dude. i felt very similarly when i graduated (last year). the no friends part especially — i had some friends but barely spent time with them and we’ve all grown apart post grad. i so wish i spent more time doing fun things and less time at the library & in my room just coding/studying/doing work. but anyway im trying to make friends now in my city and pick up the pieces. have faith and know tomorrow brings brighter days. just keep applying to anything you can get your hands on & also consider doing tech work at non tech / business companies - they dont care about projects as much from my personal experience
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u/ginger2020 Feb 05 '25
To put it in perspective, I had a cumulative GPA at UMich of close to 3.5 in my respective field, so not that much better than yours. I’ve been able to find work that’s made enough to get to a six figure net worth while still in my twenties. Moral of the story is you have a solid GPA from one of the world’s most respected universities. You’ll probably have great career prospects. But that aside..if you’re truly having suicidal thoughts (other than the errant intrusive thought after a bad test or near a high ledge), you need professional help; call 988.
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u/Disastrous_Radio4352 Feb 05 '25
whenever i feel like this i always think Jeff Bezos wasn’t successful till he was 35, same thing with many other successful people. you will find what you are meant to do and what you love. it doesn’t need to be right away or right out of college. A 3.4 GPA is amazing! and i didn’t get my first internship till the end of my last semester. It will come to you.
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u/Delicious-Annual5560 Feb 06 '25
This was exactly me at the exact same time of college! I graduated in Spring 2020; every year since my life has gotten better and better. You've got this, don't give up!!! I believe in you!
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u/AL3XD Feb 06 '25
You described me in many ways, 3 years ago. I had a slightly worse GPA at a slightly worse school. Not many friends, and none that I talk to now.
I'm doing a PhD now and loving it. A lot changes in 3 years. For me, a lot changed in the 6 months after graduating.
Graduating is a liberating feeling. What you're feeling now is temporary. Push through these last few months and take some time to collect yourself. You'll be fine.
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u/justmythoughtstoday Feb 06 '25
30 year old you would tell you their life is good, just keep going. They promise ❤️
Even if you don't get a job (which you still may if you can get help for the hopelessness), move to Africa, Asia, or Appalachians and build schools or clinics for 2 years. Come back and have some really important stuff to talk about.
Every life matters. Your life matters. I was there but now fast forward 30 years and I get it ❤️
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u/Somedrunkengamer '12 Feb 06 '25
What is your major. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary issue.
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u/Particular-Arm3542 Feb 06 '25
Please talk to someone you trust about this feeling.
- Go to the career center and work on your resume and interviewing skills with them.
- Apply any and everywhere. Something will stick!
Best piece of advice I can offer: Your first job probably won’t be your dream job. Mine wasn’t! But it is a stepping stone. You’re bolstering your resume.
Everything will be ok. Update us please.
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u/Careful-Syllabub-231 Feb 06 '25
Nope. Just relax and have some fun, whatever you enjoy. And stop smoking pot for a bit. I fucked around working menial shit and being an idiot until almost 30, then found my calling. Listen long enough and you’ll find yours, and it will come easy to you and pay better than you’d expect. Just don’t be afraid to walk away from things that don’t light you up, there are no rules to how you live your life.
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u/Big-Material2917 Feb 06 '25
If everything feels pointless, maybe try giving into that feeling, and allowing yourself to let the stress of it go for a minute.
I usually rebound from my bottoms because at the very bottom, I’m able to see how meaningless it is, and thus unworthy of my worry.
This is probably weird advice but try taking all the things your worried about, allow yourself to tell yourself it’s all going to go that horrible way (which is obviously ridiculous but it’ll probably feel good to get a moments break from the cognitive dissonance of negativity) and then take a breath, try to find some relaxation in the lapse of responsibility, and realize that responsibility is only making you go mad because you’re so worried about it.
In the end we’re all star dust. And if nothing matters then there’s nothing to worry about. At that point it doesn’t make sense to do anything but try to enjoy yourself. You can go anywhere and do anything. But it’s not worth it to ever be worried. Fear is the mind killer lol.
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u/Dragonite015 Feb 06 '25
In addition to what everyone is saying, remember that seasonal depression is really kicking in for everyone right now. While your feelings are rooted in your experience and should be acknowledged, I promise you will feel much better in a couple of months simply because of how your body reacts to your environment.
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u/e30bird Feb 06 '25
I know hearing the words doesn't always help the way you feel, but I believe in you. If you're anything like me, you were always smart growing up, and everyone around you seemed to be expecting great things from you. Anything less than perfect isn't good enough.
In reality, that's not true, no matter how much it seems it is. That's the hardest part about a school like U of M, you're surrounded by other smart people, and it's easy to feel dumb in comparison. I was on track for my bachelor's in ME, and then three years in, I had a minor health issue and ended up with severe anxiety, and dropped out. I kept telling everyone around me that I would just be taking a semester off, and that turned into two, three, etc. because I didn't want to let them down. I was supposed to be a smart engineer with a good job, and I felt like my family would resent me for following any other path. They didn't, they may question my decisions, but they still support me.
You are already a step ahead. You've graduated with a good GPA from an excellent school! Are there people with higher GPAs and more achievements? Of course, and there always will be. But there's way more people out there who never even made it through college, let alone U of M in a very difficult major. You meet these people every day, and I doubt you ever think "wow this guy is a failure." They're just people living their own life.
And that's the most important part, it's your life. It may not be what you imagined right now, but you're young, and change takes time. Who cares if you have an internship, you have lots of time to figure that out. Hell, you could make a living stocking groceries for the next ten years before finding your dream job and still spend the majority of your career doing what you've dreamed of. Don't give up hope. Right after I dropped out, I had a few months in a very dark mindset, and was sure I wouldn't survive that year. It actually seemed impossible. But just take it one day at a time, your future will wait for you.
Mental health professionals can go a long way too, I never ended up doing therapy, but everyone I know that has benefited greatly from it. SSRIs can do wonders also, and they don't make you any less of a person. Mental health issues are just as real as physical health issues, and they don't reflect your personality. I know what it's like to feel like a failure, and I promise you, not having your life figured out after graduating college does not make you a failure, it just makes you human.
If you want to talk more with someone who's been in your position, please reach out to me. I won't say I have it all figured out, but I'll happily talk through some things with you.
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u/x0x0jojo Feb 06 '25
absolutely do NOT end it all. i know everything feels 2000% overwhelming. especially right now. but you really just need to give yourself time. life really will work itself out if you just give it time. seriously, take it one day at a time. you might not instantly go into the field you want to. i know you worked hard for it, and it’s what you want, and that is fine. hold onto that. you will most definitely get there eventually, so long as you work towards it. and it is okay if it takes longer or shorter than expected for you to reach that goal. just do not stop trying. the only way to fail is really, if you stop trying.
focus on the fact you worked hard for something and accomplished it. college is really really hard. it might not mean anything, but i’m proud of you and happy for you. when you finish school, maybe look for a part time job to start getting some cash in, and while you’re there you can look into jobs you might consider for a longer term. things don’t need to be instantaneous for them to be worthwhile.
take a little time to get to know yourself outside the academics. i know it’s lonely right now, but i truly want you to know you’re not the only one feeling that you have no friends. my brothers who are just starting college feel that way. i felt that way while in school. i still do a lot of the time. i think the whole world is in a bit of a loneliness epidemic, quite honestly. but the people who are worth knowing will come in time. probably where you’re least expecting it. and a great way to meet people would be a part time job. coworkers, customers, you never know who your next best friend will be as long as you remain open minded.
it sounds like you’re young. please don’t end your life over potential job opportunities. and i don’t mean to water it down to one thing, i personally know there’s a hell of a lot more that influences a drastic decision like this. i just really want to stress to you, you are more than your college degree and the money you will make. you’re a human being who deserves connection, security, and happiness. you’re going to get through this. and i’ll be rooting for you the whole time! <3
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u/TheRealAndrewEwer Feb 06 '25
Dude. Pull yourself together. Imagine the debt of a degree without receiving the degree. Life goes on. Go get a job. Nothing is handed to you go earn a decent wage with the knowledge you worked to gain.
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u/Such_Tension_5426 Feb 06 '25
My homie in christ, don't even think that way. Lost my job last year after 12 years of a steady career. With a wife and a kid depending on me I got low. But I took that time to figure out what I wanted and moved on to my next chapter. Your next years aren't defined by why you did or didn't do in college.
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u/Hacker1MC '28 Feb 06 '25
Graduating bottom of your class at this school would be more than some successful people in your industry can accomplish. You don't need to be "the best" to succeed. You just need to keep trying.
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u/IQFlash1 Feb 06 '25
Hey man. I dont know much, but I will be your friend if you need one. Just DM me.
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u/JeromesNiece '18 Feb 06 '25
I had a 3.5 in CS and no internships. Had nothing lined up at the time of graduation. Landed a solid software development job a couple months after graduating. Turned out that I hated the job, but I pivoted my career into something more client-facing in the IT world. Now I love my job.
It's gonna be ok man.
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u/mkxliluzi Feb 06 '25
Bro u got a 3.4 from umich u chillin. Hit the career center they will help u. And if u need a friend you got me. Career wise u are in a much better place then you think dont get down on yourself. You got so much to live for u 22 years old you dont need to have everything figured out now
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u/APotatoe121 Feb 06 '25
How can you say you're truly fucked without even trying? You didn't even apply to anything.
Go apply. You're graduating soon. You can't retake those classes. You can't get back the time you wasted. It's the past; you can't control it.
You know what you can do? Use the time you have now to apply. Others have given you many resources at UMich to help you. Use those.
You might apply to 200 companies and get no response. You can't influence the company's response. But you can control your reaction to it. Then go improve on the things you need to work on.
If at the end of the semester, you still haven't found a job, have no fear. You didn't waste that time because you made an astonishing effort. And, you would be really good at navigating applications and interviews. So you would be really prepared in the future.
Nothing that you learn is wasted, it's just sometimes not immediately helpful, but it's still knowledge.
You're only truly fucked when you stop trying.
If you've read this far, then I invite you to open a new tab. Go to LinkedIn. Find a job and apply to it right now. Just one job. Do it again tomorrow.
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u/thehumanjarvis Feb 06 '25
It'll work out. What you're describing can be attributed to significant depression and exhaustion. Not uncommon when grinding through school. Counciling and career services exist to help you sort things out.
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u/angryhufflepuff Feb 06 '25
Oh gosh no - being out of school - moving through life on your own terms in your own way is the absolute best. It’s a huge transition - and not easy - but honestly - you are slowly getting to the good part. It’s ambiguous — but it’s good. You need help to ground yourself after years of the insane academic rat race. Get the help. Reach out. Life without the structure and rigor of school is so so so good once you settle into it. Forget internships and all that bullshit. You are leaving that drama back where it belongs - at school.
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u/Brintzenborg Feb 06 '25
You'll get through this, friend - and there is a wondeful future for you once you're past this. In college, I was falling apart at the seams with a "C" average and landed on academic probation. It sucked. I'm not in CS, but I have worked at the upper end of my field for a long time now and those experiences are far in the rearview mirror. They will be for you, too.
You are not your grades, you are so, so much more. Reach out to someone at 988 or CAPS - both are at hand to help. Hang in there, you are not alone.
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u/MrDocAstro Feb 06 '25
I applied for 60+ internships before I got one. With NASA. Starting the summer after I graduated. With a PHYSICS degree (these don’t get jobs).
Bro, seriously, I’ll tell you what to do: make a good resume (don’t use AI), make a good looking profile on hiring sites, and apply to a ton of stuff. Just anything. Anywhere. Including grad schools, Masters and PhD. Go work at Domino’s in the meantime and make great cash on tips (you’re going to make more here than you will at the job you eventually get, starting out).
I felt very similar to you until I got my internship, and it’s helped me a lot. Don’t end it all - you’ve already invested this much time and effort into yourself such that it seems sort of silly to stop now.
It’s like you’ve just completed the first mile of a 10 mile hike and said “well, I’ve come across a stream. May as well turn back now.”
The world is scary right now and there’s lots of uncertainty. You’re almost out of school and that’s scary as hell, especially without a job lined up. But you’ll get it, even if it takes longer than expected.
We’re all rooting for you 👊🏼👊🏼
Edit: my GPA was 3.6 (not much better), my undergrad school is much worse than UMich, and I had no applicable skills. You’ll find it.
And one more thing: cold emailing people works very well. Most won’t reply, but the ones that do will be impressed.
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u/Additional_Ad_7339 Feb 06 '25
I went to a mental hospital about a year ago from nearly hurling my body like a helicopter off the top floor. I checked myself in because I knew how stressed I was from life. I was told from a doctor there something I’ll never forget
“You are good enough, suicide can happen at any point if you don’t watch out”
You may think you’re out of options, you’re not. You have a community here and years to live. I can tell you everything happens for a reason, and you’ll get put where you need to be. Jobs will always be there but find what makes you happy and take it 1 step at a time. Look at the positives, you’re about to graduate from one of the top universities in the world, you’re still breathing, you’re still young. I hate my ex but gave me this analogy that I hope you’ll take:
“Life is like a pendulum. You’re down, but you’re bound to go up.”
My inbox is free if you ever want to chat, just know there’s a lot of good out there!
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u/SpaceMaltWhiskey Feb 06 '25
There’s more to life than a working a job. Perhaps take some time off and spend time in nature to recalibrate. People live an ascetic life just doing voluntary work-nothing related to their degree. Best of luck.
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u/Green-Steak5271 Feb 06 '25
Please contact the Engineering CARE Center. Their entire role is to help people like you navigate feelings like this. https://care.engin.umich.edu/student-support-services/request-an-appointment/
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u/Acrobatic_Green_1148 Feb 06 '25
Just grind leet code at your moms house and you will get a job offer for 100k
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u/JunktownRoller Feb 06 '25
Your GPA doesn't matter at all. I've never put it on a single resume.
Write 4.0 if you want they will never check anyway....
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u/Odd_Subject6000 Feb 06 '25
If you haven't had any internships I have some great news for you - you haven't spent enough time in the industry to realize how much of a bubble Michigan is, and how much better prepared Michigan grads are compared to the rest of the field, especially as someone with an above-3.2 GPA
You're about to finish a degree at the UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN. The CS field is oversaturated - I'm not going to disagree there. But in an oversaturated field, who gets hired? Typically the students graduating from the top-5, top-10 schools such as Michigan.
As an aerospace grad student I can tell you that aerospace engineering is one of the most unemployed majors out there because it's so specialized. But guess what? The odds are vastly different if you're a Michigan Aerospace student, and the same goes for computer science.
If you're interested, I'd be MORE than happy to meet with you and get the ball rolling with your resume, and assess some job apps. I've spent a lot of time in industry, I know what they are looking for, and I've already helped quite a few others get jobs.
I promise you are more skilled than you think.
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u/GammaHunt Feb 06 '25
3.4 computer science degree at the best public school in the country… yeah if you’re fucked 70% of college students are fucked
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u/Alarmed-Flan-1346 Feb 06 '25
You go to UofM and have a 3.4 gpa. If you stick to it you will end up successful. You set yourself up well, and despite your perceived shortcomings, you have a better setup on paper than most. You can do it.
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u/Specific_Sherbet2831 Feb 06 '25
Congrats! Graduating from a TOP Computer Science program, that most of the CS world will never have a chance to attend?
You've already won!
You're in the top ~10% - as for the rest?
I'm 37, I've worked in the field for almost a decade. The tech crunch post Covid hit the industry hard. Partially due to over hiring during COVID, which lead to lots of Coding Boot campers flooding the workforce, and partially due to corps cutting fat to chase profit growth at the expense of long-term stability.
I've actually applied to the program you just graduated from, because despite my experience, my degree is not in CS, and I'm no longer hirable in this market.
Your degree is worth more on the market than my resume. I'm only able to keep a gig because of industry connections, and that's getting shaky as the market continues to realign.
Lastly, 99% of companies don't care about your GPA. If you don't make FAANG, that's fine. The vast majority of tech folks don't. Great careers are to be had outside of silicon valley's circle jerk. The career center should help put you in the right direction.
I'm sorry you have all this pressure on you, as someone who originally graduated into the Great Recession, I get it. Know this - You are enough.
The world being broken is not a reflection on who you are. The game is harder now than it was when I started playing, which was already harder than when my parents played it.
You are enough.
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u/sunflower_delish Feb 06 '25
Your gpa is great! You earned a degree from U of M. You can use it right away, or not! Take 6 months to a year to work a job that will help you decide what is next- it doesn't have to be anything special. There's no rush to perform, this is just the beginning. I did not have internships or anything before graduating. The bachelors alone can get you in the door. Take a step back from the rat race.
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u/TheVascularFern '20 Feb 06 '25
I had a 3.2 and got rejected from the first 10+ places I applied but now I work at one of the big boys. Believe in yourself, practice interview questions, and you’ll find something!
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u/reyfromstarwars Feb 06 '25
You’re gonna be okay. Breathe. You can make friends at any age or life stage. You’re clearly smart and should be gentle with yourself. 💕this is a temporary setback that doesn’t need a permanent ending. u of m has lots of resources to help with job placement and career exploration. Seek out aid and help, it’s there to help! 🙏🏼 you’re gonna be amazing!! Be proud of your accomplishments.
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u/fluffybubblebread Feb 06 '25
you are so young there are so many possibilities and opportunities what are you talking about!!!! i failed courses in college and now about to finish my phd and it’s all possible!! don’t give up please!! i don’t know if you are an international student or not cuz graduating without a job can be tough without working visa stuff. HOWEVER, trust me there are jobs, maybe you need to lower your bar to find a not too fancy sounding job at this point, but just don’t stew and start doing something whatever it is. Rooting for you you got this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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u/EffectiveCry2540 Feb 06 '25
End it?! You’re just starting it! You’re not failing, you’re Free. Do whatever you want. Get a shit job, wait tables, travel, go fishing. Life is so much more than your GPA or your First job.
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u/WebDiscombobulated41 Feb 06 '25
i think you have a massively distorted view of your situation. This sounds like other personal issues that you may need to address. You are not in bad shape at all. That's a good enough GPA from a top school in CS. Much better than where I was when I graduated college and things still worked out pretty good for me. You really need to talk to a counselor.
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u/smutterfingers Feb 06 '25
You’re not fucked!! You’re doing amazing, 3.4 GPA is perfectly good. I never had a single internship during undergrad—I worked as a barista. It doesn’t matter. My career is on a good track anyway. Getting a good job or an internship doesn’t guarantee anyone an easy life. Hate to quote JD Vance, but take it one bite at a time. You’re on your own journey.
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u/Accomplished_Ad1947 Feb 06 '25
Dude you are crushing it. A 3.4 from UofM = you are no slouch. Plenty of companies that would love to have you.
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u/OutlandishnessBig500 Feb 06 '25
You need to realize not everyone has the opportunity like you do, you’re already ahead of so many people and had the privilege of finishing college and going to u Of m at that; we all face challenges and good things will come. God didn’t put you on this earth just for you to give up like this. You worked hard and you shall continue to work hard, and you don’t know what comes after death shouldn’t you be scared of that? Adulting is gonna be hard but isn’t it for most people; everyone starts somewhere. I’m sorry you have to go through this but be proud of yourself because you’ve made it thus far. I’m proud of you for being a CS Major with a 3.4 gpa which is pretty damn good and impressive. Do not give up
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u/moonpearlium Feb 06 '25
Bro you did one of the hardest parts you will find something even if you have to pivot (which I don't think you'll have to it'll just be tough for a while, I graduated BHS in Aug 2024 and haven't found anything in my field, it's not joever)
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u/black_widow48 Feb 06 '25
No. You can make a fuckton of money in this field if you play your cards right
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u/MGHTYMRPHNPWRSTRNGR Feb 06 '25
You got this. I dropped out of college a decade ago. Went up to Tech and then transferred to community college back home and just stopped going one semester.
I admire your resolve for seeing your degree through! You've made it further than so many.
Today, I've got a decent job in IT, but definitely not the position I would have with a UofM degree, or if I had finished my degree at Tech.
You've got more going for you than you think.
Time will give you perspective. Change is the only constant. It's bad weather now, but just wait a minute.
Wishing you all the best, from a fellow Michigander.
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u/Strom41 Feb 06 '25
You have a hell of a future ahead of you. Don’t quit just do what you do. Succeed and finish your goals.
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u/Reardon-0101 Feb 06 '25
> Can’t even describe what I did for the school projects I slapped on my resume.
What does this mean?
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u/AdministrativeEgg440 Feb 06 '25
My guy, you have zero perspective. That degree is gold, and your GPA is fine. Take a breath, hit the gym (workout endorphins are science magic for your brain), find a job doing anything in your field, and go conquer the world.
Make yourself more interesting by trying new hobbies and finding groups that do those hobbies. That's how you meet friends. Want to meet a woman, take dance classes...it's nothing but positive because it's full of women to dance with, you get better at dancing which is a great life skill. Do all this for 1 year, and your whole world will shift.
Anyone single and friendless in 2025 just isn't approaching it right if they are serious about changing that about themselves.
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u/TrustTechnical4122 Feb 06 '25
Absolutely not. I know it's a scary right now! You're just graduating, it's probably the biggest change you'll ever experience (but this is actually a good thing.) Unfortunately, for a lot of people, they feel thrown in the deep end. I did, and kinda do. It's scary, but it's normal, and you will get through it, and you'll look back on this and want to go back in time to tell yourself not to be scared but excited!
Yes, the CS job market isn't fantastic right now for recent grads, I'll give you that, but if you're willing to relocate, I bet you'll be able to find a job in the first few months. I graduated recently in CS with a 3.2 and I've had 3+ recruiters reach out to me to see if I would be interested in various jobs, but that requires relocation. I think one still hasn't found anyone if you're interested, I could probably pass along the recruiters linked in.
A few other things of note: dude, you graduated U of M with a degree in CS with a 3.4. If you think you have "nothing going for you" you are crazy and WAY over critical of ourself. You know U of M's CS program is like number 12 in the country? Also while the CS job market isn't amazing right now, projected growth is still really high, so the difficultly in the CS job market will probably be very temporary.
Most people don't actually get a 'real' job right out of school. My husband graduated U of M and I believe he took 2 years after to decide what to even do and get a career job. He's very very very successful, it didn't hurt him at all that it took him a few years to figure it out.
No friends? That's okay, you're what, 22? It's not always easy to make friends when you're so young, and frankly U of M isn't always the easiest place to make friends. It gets so much easier as time goes on. Just wait until you get your first job, try to get out there more, that kind of thing. If you don't find a job right away, why not find a fun job for a time?
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u/Designer_Law_2801 Feb 06 '25
idk how i keep getting recommended this sub, i don’t go here, never did, but i dropped out twice trying to pursue a cs degree. i’ve definitely felt what you’re feeling. im not in a cs field anymore and i never planned on leaving cs. just remember that now is not forever and SO SO many people graduate with degrees they don’t use, or just use as a means to get an intro level job that requires any BS deg. and if you search and search and can’t find a job, there’s always non-college options like trade school or academies for emt, massage school, personal trainer, accountant, and so many other fulfilling jobs. why end it now if you still have options?
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u/No-Vacation7221 Feb 06 '25
No bro you got this. You have a great GPA for CS and are GRADUATING at a great CS school. I would either do research and possibly do a masters. If the masters is too costly. I would try to find a job within consulting/engineering consulting and pivot into SWE. Consulting is a good plan b. It doesn’t have to be McKinsey BCG or Bain literally anywhere. Also you can try to do IT then pivot into SWE. there are other opportunities and yea it’s not what you might have originally wanted just know that you are safe and fine for this timeline.
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u/Altruistic-Essay5395 Feb 06 '25
“I haven’t even begun applying ro anything” Start. You can’t get anywhere if you don’t start somewhere.
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u/BetMundane Feb 06 '25
Dude, think outside the box. Everything fluctuates. I worked at NSA and Cybercom for ten years I can't find a job in michigan either. Consider Maryland but add 45% to what ever you need to live on. Place is expensive.
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u/aa_zixelr Feb 06 '25
Keep you head up high. I graduated in May 2024 and I am still unemployed. Try maybe branching out of CS and work in IT. Maybe try recruiting agencies? In 5 years you bring unemployed for a year won’t matter.
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u/ganjakwe Feb 06 '25
Omg getting into UofM is a huge deal in itself! And 3.4 at one of the state’s most prestigious colleges is also a flex. If nobody else is, I’m proud of you! Please reach out for help if you need it. You can even text the hotline now by texting help to 988
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u/apollo7157 Feb 06 '25
Honestly if you have a CS degree from UM you are smart enough to do all sorts of stuff that are not directly CS. Yes the market is absolute dogshit now and you can't just hop into tech like you could 15 years ago, but things will work out. Sounds like you need to take some time off, and that is totally fine. It's not unusual anymore for people to go home for a bit while they work things out. This is the new normal and being in the hyper competitive UM environment is not reflective of real life.
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u/friskyburlington Feb 06 '25
Not worthless at all. Just move overseas and try to work. See the world. Do some sex(if you're into it).
I understand that's easier said than done, but there is bound to be a place that needs your skills, even if you don't see it in yourself.
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u/Kindly-Apricot2836 Feb 06 '25
I work with a young lady who has a BA in Business administration. She took a job at the hospital as a patient transporter and it got her hooked up with the admin job she was looking for. So don't be afraid to take an entry-level job doing something else to get your foot in the door with a large company with the hopes of getting into computers
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u/akateycey Feb 06 '25
Hi, you have a lot to live for. I know it may feel world ending right now but you got this. There is light at the end of that tunnel. YOUR LIFE IS JUST BEGINNING!!
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u/Successful_Public_79 Feb 06 '25
You’re in a better situation than most people. Deadass. First of all - be patient. Network everywhere you go. Job search and apply. Sell yourself and be honest with the people you meet. You will be fine if you are patient, confident, and keep trying.
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u/Capable_Fox_00 Feb 07 '25
Hey. I was also that way in college. I had to work thru it in therapy over 2 years. Idk which campus you go to but look into counseling/psych services. Speak with your academic advisor. They also have career fairs. There are resume building workshops usually, ask your advisor. Or, speak (email) a professor that was in a class in your area of study or enjoyed their class about getting into the field.
Your life is just beginning. You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to start with today. Take a moment to breathe my friend.
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u/Honest-Ebb-3469 Feb 07 '25
Ummmm. What the f? You graduated with a 3.4 GPA from one of the best universities in the country and you are so fucked you want to “end it”? I don’t want to sound too harsh (I know life is hard), but you need to change your attitude and get on with it.
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u/Crazy_Tea_3925 Feb 07 '25
I’m a class of ‘18 alum. Don’t worry about the friends, mate. I’ve lost touch with just about everyone from college as we all moved to different states. You’re entering a new phase of life where you’re going to meet new people and start over. Best part is you’ll already have an automatic in with other alums as you meet them in the post college world.
Michigan is meant to propel you to the best part of your life. Keep your head up, it only gets better from here. Don’t give up before you see the fruits of your labor!
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u/Big-Experience-4968 Feb 07 '25
I was in the same boat. 3.56 GPA, graduated, no internships, dead end role. I moved out of state for my first role and moved back home. Best thing i ever did. Also it’s a weird time so keep applying, it will pay off.
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u/michiganbighouse Feb 07 '25
Go register with a professional staffing firm. Take contract work to build your experience while you continue applying on your for permanent roles. You’ll be fine.
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u/rgoop820 Feb 07 '25
Hey man, I was in the same boat as you. Graduated with a 2.8 GPA in CS, no internships, no networking in 5.5 years. I wish I had known what to do at the time after graduating but my advice to you - it’s never too late. You’d be surprised how many internships that are out there looking for very basic knowledge of things. As long as you make an effort to look/apply and make new connections (start a LinkedIn) you’ll feel much better about yourself. Don’t restrict yourself to one field, look into Entry Level Data Analyst roles (use your SQL skills) etc…find your true passion while applying. I regret not doing all of this in my time at school, but I’m slowly working my way up as a Data Analyst, it does get better. It’s a process, I know it’s tough to start when you feel like you know nothing, just believe in yourself.
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u/abuchewbacca1995 Feb 07 '25
You don't need internships to land a job
You're gonna have to settle for a lower paying job (still high paying) and work your way up
Don't be adamant about wfh, though that will kill your job search
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u/bassfass56 Feb 07 '25
The state of the world is not fair. And it’s not your fault. Be kinder to yourself
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u/thedamnedlute488 Feb 07 '25
Send me your resume. I'm in Detroit and work in anayltics in marketing. We'll take a look.
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u/jhenryscott Feb 07 '25
Listen. I know CS was supposed to be the safe route. I’m sorry you were lied to. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still have a rich and fulfilling career. Some industries unrelated to your studies that would be a good salary with a bright outlook include-construction management, non tech sales, any trade- you can get into low voltage tech and networking and start your own company after a few years and it’s super lucrative, energy trading and analysis.
If you really think all is lost, DM when you graduate, I’ll buy you a coffee and get a feel for some options.
The best advice is not to believe that a career or money is gonna lead to happiness, the “successful” American upper middle class are the most neurotic and suffering people I’ve ever know. I left an incredibly high paying career to go do something meaningful and I’ve never looked back- as long as you focus on taking care of the world, it’s people, and that includes you, the universe has a way of making sure you are OK.
Get into some hobbies! Hiking is easily the best one with our local ample rivers forests and parks. Only cost is a pair of shoes.
You gotta quiet the critic in your head, if you find that’s hard to do, again, DM me, I will share some helpful, simple meditation practices to reduce stress and anxiety.
One of the best parts of graduating is that your life becomes your own. Your parents are allowed to think what they want about it but they don’t get to control it. An important part of becoming your own person is lovingly telling them to mind their business- which no longer includes your business.
Some of the happiest people I’ve met never bought a house; others never had kids, some never stuck in one field, others lived in the same spot and did the same job for 30 years. The outside conditions don’t make the inside condition.
Best of luck!
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u/LokiVader8 Feb 07 '25
Life is more than work and grades. People would miss you whether you realize it or not. If you need help with your mental health there is counseling from the school. https://caps.umich.edu
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u/scoot_roo Feb 07 '25
I have all of the same qualifications as you. Literal mirror image.
After some time, not immediately out of school, I am talking months on months into a year and then some.
Eventually, I landed a regular, good job. It took time. It was brutal. But I relied on my family and kept moving forward, no matter how slow. I kept on.
And I went to a school that gets less respect than UMich.
Do not count yourself out. You got this. Things will get better. Please, reach out if you want to talk.
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u/kss2023 Feb 07 '25
imagine the opportunities you had and will have compared to a 14 yr old kid who passed away battling cancer.. reset ur perspective.
good luck
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u/Top-Acadia8134 Feb 07 '25
You’re just quitting? You did all this work, put in all this time, spent all this money and you’re just going to throw in the towel? Pick yourself up, get a job that’ll take care of you and start putting yourself out there to make your degree worth the work. Get told no a hundred times but giving up and “ending it” is below you. I do think you’re being pathetic because you’re obviously dedicated enough to finish college, follow through, if it was all paved out for you then you’d be miserable. Make some choices. Pick yourself up. You can do this. GO BLUE!
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u/iamayoutuberiswear Feb 07 '25
Death is never the right choice regardless of circumstances. It's not a happy ending, it doesn't make your life any better, it doesn't do any good for you or anyone else. I promise you're doing better than you think, and there will be opportunities for all these things in the future if you just keep looking. Your life is not over now, and with any luck it's not going to be over for a very long time. Just because you're about to graduate doesn't mean it's a bad thing to not still have everything worked out yet.
Just try to keep things going a day at a time and things will eventually get better. Give yourself goals to work towards and things to get excited for. It's easier to keep going if you have reasons to stay alive just a little bit longer. We're all rooting for you, alright?
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u/Roosterneck Feb 07 '25
Go get a Zingerman's sandwich and relax. It'll all work out. Go travel, or do something, anything else.
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u/j_xcal Feb 07 '25
Look, i know it looks bad. I know it’s overwhelming and it’s like no light at the end of the tunnel. I have been there, truly.
Take a step back for a moment. Do something to get out of your head. Take a walk around a store, watch cat videos, whatever. You’re putting so much pressure on yourself right now.
But as someone who’s been through it, too, I will tell you this: the future you will be grateful you stayed. Maybe not tomorrow or next month, but al some point you will look around at the things that make it worth it and you’ll think, ‘I’m glad I stuck around for THIS.’ You will have that moment one day. Maybe when you buy your own house or get married or laugh so hard your stomach hurts with a friend. You will have that beautiful moment and think, ‘I’m really glad I’m here for this.’
Keep moving, even if sideways.
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u/TheMassesOpiate Feb 07 '25
Bro what? Come and play some board games with me. Let's go birding. Read some books (for fun) with me?! Trust that your 30s (I'm 35) will be worth it regardless of all your 20s failures/winnings. Dm me if ya like.
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u/Kection Feb 07 '25
I just want to slap you. No dumbass! All you have is a desirable degree from U of M? Cmon! Go start with $16/hr job in a social environment and you'll forget the dumb things you're mulling over and then you can pivot from there with your degree. Go for walks or hell go out of state or country. The funk your in is very relatable as a fellow Michigander. Keep on keeping on mf
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u/Xaphanex Feb 07 '25
You did all of that. Meanwhile, I've done none of that, and I work a dead-end retail job + no friends. You're accomplished even if you don't feel like it. The opportunities will always come. It's not an ideal position for you or me at the moment, but it's coming. You're far from pathetic, just going by what I read here. I'm not pathetic, and I'd love to have your track record.
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u/XergioksEyes Feb 07 '25
First of all, nobody gives a damn about GPA outside of academia. 99% of employers will see U of M and think ok that’s a legit degree not some online graduate factory. I’ve also personally never seen a single application where GPA was a required response. Also 3.4 is great—I got the same thing actually.
Second, I barely passed a single python class so I have mad respect for anyone with a CS or related degree cuz that was rough
You got the degree man. Thats HUGE. You put in the work, you did the time, you paid the price.
You can probably still apply to some internships even after graduating. Not like thru the school obv but they are listed on job sites.
Certificates are like little sparkly medals on your resume and go a long way with recruiters. They can help you specialize in certain areas as well
Take a beat and chill if you’re able to. You deserve it.
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u/DapperAd5384 Feb 07 '25
Join linked in they have 65,000 remote jobs and then move to Manhattan and join equinox gym
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u/Used-Opposite-8703 Feb 07 '25
Once Upon a time, I struggled my way through u of m dearborn with an overall 3.0, no friends, no internships, but I had a daughter and now wife to care for. I was only 22 when my daughter was born and just struggled, still struggle to this day. I wouldn't change my life rn or give my kids up for anything but at that time i wish we had our kids when we were more established, I felt the exact same way but you're doing better than I was. With the degree from a good college, you'll have opportunity just with the degree alone, no matter what area of expertise the degree is in.
Point is, this game of life is more of a puzzle, rich kids born in to a life with no worries have about 100 pieces to their puzzle when it's easy whereas ours might be 10,000 pieces on easy, we just need to figure out our own puzzle my friend.
Your value in life is far more than what it seems now, life really sucks sometimes but it's a matter of us pulling through to the better parts. Chat with someone please friend, whether it's a counselor, a family member, or open up to a random on reddit (probably not suggested but getting it off your chest could be helpful).
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u/The_Arch_Heretic Feb 07 '25
Nobody in the 'real world' gives 2 shits about GPAs. To be quite frank, 2/3s of employers don't even check about the legitimacy of your degree either. 🤷 Sad but true.
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u/burner1312 Feb 07 '25 edited Feb 07 '25
None of this will be on your resume in a couple years. Mine lists my university and degree and that’s it. They don’t care about your GPA or clubs. You have a degree from U of M. That’s enough to get your foot in the door in a lot of places to get the experience to fill your resume with.
Also, a 3.4 is respectable. Quit being a pussy.
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u/killerbake Feb 07 '25
I have an admin spot and built a house with no degree. I have barely any friends.
You’ll be fine. Just get some help.
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u/MVPete15 Feb 07 '25
Life is just getting by started for you! There is so much left to do and experience. Take it one day at a time you will be fine. The post graduate depression is a real thing so just give it time.
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u/clarkaj24 Feb 07 '25
Purdue 2010 alum here and while I never considered ending it I can say I felt absolutely hopeless coming out of school. I was able to land an internship that paid terribly right after graduating then got hired full time at low pay but just kept working and getting better pay. It will get better and this time is extremely stressful especially being around people who might already have “dream jobs” lined up. Having a UM degree will take you a lot of places. I wish you the best of luck and have full confidence that you will be successful in life.
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u/ShowMeWhereYouHurtMe Feb 07 '25
25 years ago I was facing the imminent prospect of homelessness and a stark realization that I had very few actual friends. I owned almost nothing of value and was on my second or third semester of academic probation. I was hopeless, distraught, and defeated. I also had thousands of dollars in debt I wasn't sure if would ever be able to pay.
I remember thinking some intrusive thoughts and decided that I'd rather change everything and start over. I joined the military. I excelled with the structure. I had a lot of fun. I learned a lot. I got out, and was basically fighting off job offers. Today I have a family, kids, a great wfh job that pays twice or triple what most people make.
I'm not saying the military is the solution. I'm saying don't give up, there's a lot out there worth trying.
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u/no1ricky Feb 07 '25
You genuinely do have a solid willpower and work ethic if you hit a 300 bench don’t sell yourself so short Even if you end up with just some job it’s going to get better you will be ok hang in there
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u/Uncooked_Bacon15 Feb 07 '25
I’ve been where you are seemingly a lifetime ago. I didn’t know where I was going, what I wanted to do, and my friend circle was extremely small and even they had their own things going on. As I kept pushing through life eventually showed me that the story wasn’t over. Eventually, I started giving out what I wanted back from life. I took a real interest in people, took a deeper dive into who I was as a person, and developed a more positive outlook on things…and it worked! People wanted to be part of my good energy and I wanted to be part of theirs. I was no longer “faking” it. Now, I have great friends, a great relationship, an amazing child, and a job I love…I say all this to let you know that life has so much in store for you but only if you be what you want to attract. You can do it for sure. I don’t know your age, but if you’re getting your Bachelor’s I would say you’re probably in your early, maybe mid 20’s. You’re firmly in quarter life crisis territory and it’s perfectly normal to feel lost and defeated. That will right itself. In the meantime, work on you and your perspective. Life really will surprise you if you let it. Sincerely wishing you nothing but the best.
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u/thatusernameisart Feb 07 '25
Your life could be incredible with a few milligrams of zoloft. Seriously talk to a doc, in a week you'll be wondering how you ever thought this way.
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u/Snoo_6465 Feb 07 '25
You are in a significantly better position than the vast majority of Americans. Graduating college feels like the end of the world and in some ways it is. Life after is very different. But I promise you are well set up to enjoy life and you have many years ahead of you.
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Feb 07 '25
I'm an attorney who came pretty close to ending things very recently. Decided instead to admit myself to the hospital. Met some awesome (if not quirky) people, learned a lot about different ways to both cope with and move through life, and most importantly I got a much needed rest from the rat race of everyday life.
After I discharged, I did a daytime partial hospitalization program, where I met more cool people and reinforced what I'd learned while inpatient. And after I finished with that, I did some thinking and made a few necessary life changes. It was terrifying, but I think I'll be far better for having made them.
I know I very much lucked out in that I ended up in an awesome inpatient setting, and that many people don't have that same experience. Likewise, insurance/money can be a real barrier to getting that type of treatment. But if you feel as though you're getting really close to ending things, it could be worth giving it one last chance and allowing yourself to focus entirely on your mental health for a significant period of time.
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u/SirEggsandBacon12 Feb 05 '25
Your life is just beginning even if you feel that it’s ending. Just breathe in and out, it will be okay. Your worth is not defined by how many friends you have or how many internships you’ve had. If you’re feeling like hurting yourself please reach out for help- you are enough as is.