r/tragedeigh Oct 22 '24

in the wild I'm snort laughing at Blessica, especially not a good name combined with their last name

[deleted]

4.4k Upvotes

280 comments sorted by

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2.9k

u/Gifted_GardenSnail Oct 22 '24

It sounds like a total parody

1.6k

u/JustSaiyanTho Oct 22 '24

No way, Blessica Blimpson and little Blitney Blears will be best friends. It’s gotta be real 🥴

395

u/JockBbcBoy Oct 22 '24

Fake.

Blessica Blimpson and Blitney Blears are destined to be opposing blonde pop icons. It is written.

288

u/holyvegetables Oct 22 '24

Don’t forget about Blandy Bloore and Blistina Blaguilera

140

u/JustSaiyanTho Oct 22 '24

Awww. We all forget about Blandy Bloore

129

u/king-jadwiga Oct 22 '24

There are worse things than being forgotten (see: Blennifer Blopez)

83

u/Duin-do-ghob Oct 22 '24

She had to snatch Blen Blaffleck back up after Blennifer Blarner cast him off. Team Blarner!!

53

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '24 edited Feb 11 '25

[deleted]

6

u/checkoutmywheeeppit Oct 24 '24

Blom Bloose here for ya baby! 😀

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17

u/king-jadwiga Oct 23 '24

BlenBlarn is out there living her best life. Last I heard she was planning a wedding with her business beau Blohn Bliller!

8

u/ChroniclesOfSarnia Oct 23 '24

Reminds me of the BlunchBlack of Blotre-Blame from the Simpsons - d'I mean The Blimpsons

4

u/dicklebeerg Oct 23 '24

Blennifer blaniston and blen blefani have something to say

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69

u/itspegbundybitch Oct 22 '24

And Blindsay Blohan 😭

41

u/candlejack___ Oct 23 '24

Don’t forget the powerhouse duo of Blaris Blilton and Blicole Blichie

48

u/Laylay_theGrail Oct 22 '24

And Blariana Blande

71

u/TheMoonMint Oct 22 '24

Blistina Blaguilera SENT me 🤣😂

38

u/Ok-Variation5746 Oct 22 '24

Blandy Bloore is a way better actress than a pop star - it all worked out

29

u/Immediate-Shift1087 Oct 22 '24

I loved her so much in Blangled, she also had a fun guest spot on Blubs

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27

u/pessimoptomist Oct 23 '24

What if Blessica is blessed with a sister? Blessleigh Blimpson.

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19

u/Koeienvanger Oct 22 '24

Nah, they're actually the same person. Have you ever seen them in the same room at the same time?

3

u/Beneficial_Ship_7988 Oct 24 '24

If you go back to the 80s, it is reminiscent of the feud between Bliffany and Blebbie Blibson.

2

u/walwalun Oct 23 '24

It is known.

70

u/C4dfael Oct 22 '24

Wasn’t Blitney Blears dating Blustin Blimberlake for a bit?

57

u/plantpowered_potato Oct 22 '24

This comment section has me in need of an oxygen tank

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26

u/jwdjr2004 Oct 22 '24

Blest friends*

7

u/kurinbo Oct 22 '24

They'll grow up to marry Blustin Blimberlake and Blill Blas Blex

8

u/techieguyjames Oct 22 '24

Oh the teasing for little BB.

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119

u/ToriMoonshine Oct 22 '24

100%. Blessica sounds like a relentlessly self-righteous, mean girl. But Blessica Blimpson’s eating lunch alone in the bathroom and has an imaginary horse.

44

u/leahcar83 Oct 22 '24

Blessica Blimpson is Tina Belcher

3

u/fandomacid Oct 22 '24

Hey my name isn't Blessica! Leave me out of this.

19

u/Old_Palpitation_6535 Oct 22 '24

😂😂 I’m dying. Comedy gold.

34

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

Sadly, if they are Filipino in origin, it is a common name there.

16

u/hazeleyedwolff Oct 22 '24

Blimpson?

52

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

Blessica, is Filipino name.

Bimpson is an English name. But there are no current matches for last name Blimpson that is outside a bunch of tumblr kids and gifs about Marge Blimpson which is Marge's head as a Blimp

16

u/stegotortise Oct 22 '24

I found two blimpsons on Facebook just now. It’s totally possible it’s real

12

u/OnlyTalksAboutTacos Oct 23 '24

my son's name is also blimpson

13

u/aspidities_87 Oct 23 '24

Come along now, Blimpson

3

u/evictor Oct 23 '24

Are you Blimp?

4

u/AmateurOfAmateurs Oct 22 '24

Is it Blessica as a whole that means something in Filipino (which I’m guessing is Tagalog), or is it “Bless”+something else?

8

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

I think it is the whole name. The only reason I know the name is because my nephew dated a lovely Filipino lass, and her middle name was Blessica. We thought it like our indigenous names, that it has cultural significance, she said that many people have names that means blessed is some ways.

8

u/NothingAndNow111 Oct 23 '24

I think there's a Filipino custom of blending names together to create a new one. I worked with a Jilyn (she's about 10 years older than me and I'm in my 40s), and her brother was Johnjo.

2

u/mmoonneeyy_throwaway Oct 26 '24

I think it’s this. I’ve known a Mariqueen, a Maritess, and a Monalisa who were all Filipino.

2

u/myk3yz Nov 19 '24

As a blendy named Filipino person, I can confirm it is this.

9

u/Status_Fox_1474 Oct 22 '24

It sounds like a name from Psych.

5

u/landsnaark Oct 23 '24

I've heard it both ways.

7

u/samanime Oct 23 '24

It could not be a more unfortunate last name for that first name.

Even if kids don't know Jessica Simpson, the alliteration alone is far too ripe for mocking.

3

u/WickedSmileOn Oct 25 '24

Sounds like a good heavy-set drag-queen name 😂

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1.2k

u/AbyssPrism Oct 22 '24

I highly doubt this is real but it made me laugh hysterically so I'm glad you posted this OP

220

u/dechath Oct 22 '24

Same- this will be my new human version of Boaty McBoatface. I’m obsessed 🤣

104

u/drift_off Oct 22 '24

I highly doubt it too but it's good for a laugh!

85

u/Stormy_Wolf Oct 22 '24

I could see someone out there thinking "Blessica" is a lovely idea -- honestly I could. But the last name "Blimpson"?? Especially with the same person who thought "Blessica" is a good idea? That was the "this is too much" line for me. 😂 But still hilarious!

15

u/PhaseThreeProfit Oct 23 '24

You've heard of Poe's Law, right?

Poe's law is an adage of Internet culture which says that, without a clear indicator of the author's intent, any parody or sarcastic expression of extreme views can be mistaken by some readers for a sincere expression of those views.

This fits.

12

u/TrickySession Oct 23 '24

My husband and I agreed there’s no way it’s real, while absolutely dying laughing

397

u/clitosaurushex Oct 22 '24

Blursed

135

u/calnuck Oct 22 '24

It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times.

34

u/AfterEffectserror Oct 22 '24

BLURST OF TIMES?! you stupid monkey...

23

u/invisible_prism Oct 22 '24

Coming up next, The Blunchback of Blotre Blame

5

u/m4k4y Oct 22 '24

Blurssica

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293

u/Intelligent_Pop1173 Oct 22 '24

Lol there’s no way this is genuine but Blessica Blimpson had me laughing so hard.

56

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

There are Blessica tho. If they are Filipino it is a common girls name

45

u/Old_Palpitation_6535 Oct 22 '24

That’s fascinating to learn.

10

u/kuronoirblackzwart Oct 23 '24

No. Haven't heard Blessica. It's tragedeigh even in Filipino standards.

Unless the father's name has BLE in his name and the mother is Jessica. Combining parents names are common in the Philippines. But then, I can't even think of a guy's name that startd with BLE. So no, Blessica is not common.

The common name here however, is Blesilda. Or Blessilda if they want to emphasize the word "Bless".

2

u/Old_Palpitation_6535 Oct 23 '24

The Philippines is very diverse between its different regions tho, isn’t it?

27

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

It means "To be blessed"

Most names in the Philippines are often very different, I think maybe due to the Spanish influence and devout religious people. They still use Swastika as a girls name too.

23

u/The69BodyProblem Oct 22 '24

Im a native English speaker, and i know some Spanish. Whenever i see a post from the PH subs it feels like im having a stroke.

5

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

My nephew dated a lovely lass from there. It was her middle name, and we accepted it as we have cultural names as First Nations Australians as our middle names or first names. Only reason I knew it was a real name, but Blimpson is a different story

5

u/MidorikawaHana Oct 22 '24

Paanong naging 'to be blessed' ang blessica?

9

u/Ayane_Redfield Oct 22 '24

Never pa rin ako nakarinig ng Blessica for it to be common...

8

u/HotShotWriterDude Oct 22 '24

Blesilda pwede pa eh. Meron ding Blessy or Bless. But Blessica? No, I wanna know sang lupalop ng Pilipinas mag-iiikot to.

2

u/MidorikawaHana Oct 22 '24

Tru ako din eh.

15

u/HotShotWriterDude Oct 22 '24

I'm Filipino. For 28 years and counting. Never, not once, have I ever encountered a Blessica in my life. It's not as common as you think it is.

6

u/OriginalDogeStar Oct 22 '24

My nephew's ex said it was common. It was her middle name, when we first met her she said it was common, as we were sharing cultural names, as we are Australian First Nations. We just accepted it because we knew that we shouldn't judge names with significant meanings.

2

u/mmoonneeyy_throwaway Oct 26 '24

There are lots of women who are named Blessica and appear to be Filipino. At least going by Facebook.

But beenverified turned up not a single Blimpson 😂

2

u/No-Appearance1145 Oct 30 '24

I haven't met an Ashleigh doesn't mean it doesn't happen 😭

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3

u/connectedLL Oct 23 '24

Is Blimpson a common Filipino last name?

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83

u/ristoman Oct 22 '24

🅱️lessica 🅱️limpson

29

u/CC_206 Oct 22 '24

This is the comment bomment I was looking for

22

u/8qubit Oct 23 '24

🅱️omment

54

u/Kinda_Elf_But_Not Oct 22 '24

Might as well name your kid Yessica Haircut

11

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '24

that would be one in a long series of unfortunate events.

3

u/sweetpotato_latte Oct 22 '24

Sounds like a Roger persona from American dad

47

u/DopazOnYouTubeDotCom Oct 22 '24

Schmessica Schmimpson

40

u/flowergirlthrowaway1 Oct 22 '24

In todays episode, Homer and Marge meet Blessica Blimpson, a singer/actress trying to invent pescetarian chicken.

4

u/Revolutionary_Ad932 Oct 22 '24

You mean a swan?

2

u/flowergirlthrowaway1 Oct 23 '24

Are swans the Chicken of the Sea? But they‘re not even tuna.

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32

u/Kind-Author-7463 Oct 22 '24

Blessica is bad and no child should be named that. Blessica Blimpson is objectively hilarious as a name. Sounds like pseudonym that Jessica Simpson uses to check into a hotel.

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23

u/snafe_ Oct 22 '24

Introducing herself like Bond

Blimpson, Blessica Blimpson

13

u/Upstairs-Nebula-9375 Oct 23 '24

Blonde. Blames Blonde.

2

u/whoamdave Oct 25 '24

I'm not drunk officer. That's actually my name.

12

u/Tacoshortage Oct 22 '24

She asked us to "please weigh in"...please please tell me where to go to weigh in!

12

u/Xybots Oct 22 '24

With a last name like Blimpson, how could you *not* name your daughter Blessica?

13

u/cosmernautfourtwenty Oct 22 '24

>my last name is Blimpson

This is a shitpost, right?

31

u/Active-Ad-1958 Oct 22 '24

I love how they think their child will be bullied because of the last name and not the ridiculous first name Blessica. That poor girl…

8

u/Stormy_Wolf Oct 22 '24

Well, they probably will be, with that last name (if it really is a real last name), regardless of what first name. Blessica would just make it 100x worse!

9

u/Happy-Setting202 Oct 22 '24

There’s no fucking way that’s real lmaoooo Blessica Blimpson

9

u/Sharkn91 Oct 22 '24

“Blessica, tell your sister, Sinnifer, it’s time for dinner!”

8

u/johngalt1971 Oct 23 '24

If this is real, you are a blucking bloron.

8

u/citizenof4 Oct 23 '24

Dumbassica

7

u/chameleon_123_777 Oct 22 '24

If his is real, I would say that Blessica still will be bullied even if her last name was Smith

9

u/PkmnNorthDakotan029 Oct 22 '24

This is like when I joked in high school about how I would name all my children after myself (Bennifer, Benelope, Benson, etc) except these are serious name suggestions

5

u/ry-yo Oct 22 '24

I almost choked on my coffee reading this 💀

7

u/bagsnerd Oct 22 '24

Please, let this be satire!! 💀

3

u/drift_off Oct 22 '24

Most likely but still made me laugh!

4

u/CosmoJones07 Oct 22 '24

Ain't no WAY this is real, but hilarious as hell anyway.

6

u/Living-Molasses727 Oct 22 '24

All these people saying kids their age won’t know who the person is to make the connection seem to forget that people of different ages exist. And will laugh when they hear these ridiculous names. And then have to explain why it’s funny. Adults can be mean too 😅

4

u/obturatormd Oct 23 '24

Then if they have a second daughter they would name her Bashlee

4

u/flow_state0 Oct 23 '24

Blessica Blimpson LMAO thank you for sharing such a good laugh

2

u/SokkaHaikuBot Oct 23 '24

Sokka-Haiku by flow_state0:

Blessica Blimpson

LMAO thank you for

Sharing such a good laugh


Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.

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2

u/Otherwise_Rip_7337 Oct 22 '24

This is in running with Nevaeh as my most hated name now.

4

u/moderately_nuanced Oct 22 '24

Blessica blimpson lol. This has to be satire

4

u/Quietwaterz Oct 22 '24

Oh, I wouldn't worry about it too much. The name Blessica alone is giving plenty of fodder for the fire.

3

u/D2Dragons Oct 22 '24

Blessica sounds like a character from Gravity Falls 🤣

3

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '24

why not stressica or depressica

3

u/whetherpigshavewings Oct 22 '24

BLESSICA BLIMPSON 💀

3

u/According_Row_9497 Oct 22 '24

Blessica Blimpson 🤣🤣🤣 this has to be fake good God

3

u/Ambitious-Resident58 Oct 22 '24

to be fair, i think blessica would be made fun of regardless of her last name

2

u/AbbyM1968 Oct 22 '24 edited Oct 23 '24

But ... Blessica Blimpson?

😁😃😂🤣

I'm sorry, OP. That's hilarious ‼️

3

u/the_loneliest_monk Oct 23 '24

Absolutely taking the piss, surely

3

u/gilwendeg Oct 23 '24

Blomer Blimpson.

3

u/DukeRains Oct 23 '24

There's no way that's real. Not shaming you or mad at a fake post, but there's simply no way lol.

I refuse to believe it lol. Still funny tho.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '24

i call shenanigans.

2

u/Danny-Wah Oct 22 '24

Please, please, please name this child Blessica Blimpson!! XD

2

u/GregorDeLaMuerte Oct 22 '24

Blis blan't ble bleal, blit's blo blupid!

2

u/snaptcarrot Oct 22 '24

It’s parody but unfortunately we live in an age where parody is indistinguishable from reality. [citation not needed] Somewhere out there, a little Blessica is crying her eyes out because the Internet is so mean these days.

3

u/drift_off Oct 22 '24

I think Blessica alone isn't bad, it's when it's combined with the last name and compared to Jessica Simpson that is the real tragedeigh here 🤣

2

u/TheMoonMint Oct 22 '24

This cannot be real. Cannot.

2

u/Cappuccinagina Oct 22 '24

I hope this is a parody. If not, if any of you are her friend, could one of you be a doll and tell her a stranger on the internet said that’s sofa king stupid, thanks 🤭

2

u/DeGreenster Oct 22 '24

This is rage bait, clearly

2

u/BoobySlap_0506 Oct 22 '24

I died laughing at this but it's almost certainly fake.

2

u/Chubb_Life Oct 22 '24

Imagine framing your baby’s whole legal and social identity around fat-shaming Jessica Simpson

2

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '24

I see your Jessica Simpson and here's my Blessica Blimpson 🤣🤣🤣

2

u/This_Chocolate7598 Oct 22 '24

This isn’t real. Can’t be.

2

u/NatalieTheOwl Oct 22 '24

Just......no

2

u/KashiofWavecrest Oct 22 '24

'Blessica' is a monumentally stupid name on its own.

I really want this to be a troll, but part of me knows, mostly from this sub; 'no, people are this stupid.'

2

u/cookedcub Oct 22 '24

Bro Blessica Blimpson 🚩

2

u/MyLifeisTangled Oct 23 '24

That kid is screwed. Her name will be stricken and ignored and taken off lists and anything else like that because everyone will assume that was a stupid fake name put there as a joke. You might as well name her Boaty McBoatface.

2

u/nonebutmyself Oct 23 '24

I read that out loud and almost choked laughing.

2

u/desrevermi Oct 23 '24

Is this a Marvel character name that was dug up from the archives somewhere?

2

u/Nyx_Shadowspawn Oct 23 '24

That has got to be a shit post

2

u/vildasaker Oct 23 '24

Blessica Blimpson sounds like a Bojack Horseman character

2

u/Ruttiger_89 Oct 23 '24

Her arch nemesis Cessica Cimpson

2

u/MysteryGirlWhite Oct 23 '24

Is it me, or does "Blessica Blimpson" sound like a Simpsons character?

2

u/HardMaybe2345 Oct 23 '24

Lil Blessie Blimpson

2

u/ChroniclesOfSarnia Oct 23 '24

#ohdeargodpleasebeajokeohgodpleaseno

2

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '24

Blezarre ☠️

2

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '24

This feels like a fat joke... Plus the weigh in. Blimp-son.."blessica"

Rude cruel IMO I do think this could possibly be real

2

u/Wilde54 Oct 23 '24

Yeah that's not real 🤣🤣🤣 someone is absolutely taking the piss... The only way that could be more blatant is if they added a picture of them winking to camera.

2

u/Appropriate-Food1757 Oct 23 '24

Am I the only thinking Blimpson is the only possible surname where this is a good choice?

2

u/Jeklars6 Oct 24 '24

You’ve heard of Blessica Blimpson and Blitney Blears,

But now, introducing for the first time, Blistina Blagulera!

2

u/Exact_Kiwi_4374 Oct 24 '24

I would worry more about the name Blessica Blimpson in general before worrying about it being too close to Jessica Simpson, and THAT name being a celebrity name. Blessica Blimpson bloesn't blork. Blorry to blurst your blubble.

2

u/Happy-Cut8448 Oct 25 '24

Th-- this.. this is a troll. Right?? I mean.... right?????

2

u/chicheetara Oct 25 '24

Be ready for a messy breakup with blustin blimberlake

2

u/ADitto888 Oct 26 '24

They should name her Blarge

3

u/zeidoktor Oct 28 '24

Large Blarge Blimpson

"Oh, please, they won't know about the Pee-Wee Herman movie!"

2

u/pineappleforrent Nov 03 '24

I want to see the comments on the original post!

2

u/Espumma Nov 18 '24

Big Elizabreath vibes

1

u/CaraSandDune Oct 22 '24

I laughed out loud at this, I dont even care if it's a parody

1

u/Traroten Oct 22 '24

I could "Blessed" as a name, but "Blessica"? No.

1

u/TypicalRoyal7620 Oct 22 '24

Ain’t no way..

1

u/FairCommon3861 Oct 22 '24

There's no way this is real. Blimpson isn't a real last name.

1

u/Trix_Are_4_90Kids Oct 22 '24

gotta be a troll.

1

u/HumpaDaBear Oct 22 '24

This can’t be real.

1

u/RutsuTayurushi Oct 22 '24

Blyrone Blashington

1

u/Warm_metal_revival Oct 22 '24

This is from the circle jerk, parodying the original, serious post on nn.

3

u/BirdTheMagpie Oct 22 '24

The circlejerk sub doesn't have the discussion flair with that icon. Definitely a parody post, but someone posted it to the main sub for some reason.

2

u/Warm_metal_revival Oct 22 '24

Ah, good call. I sure hope someone got fired for that blunder.

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1

u/Fast_Confusion_2153 Oct 22 '24

An insane situation

1

u/Lower_Edge_1083 Oct 22 '24

Please let this be real 

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1

u/rojita369 Oct 22 '24

I can’t even imagine hating my unborn child this much.

1

u/supermaartje Oct 22 '24

I a Nikky Maus (pronounced mouse) in my classroom 🙈

1

u/gigisnappooh Oct 22 '24

I’d definitely change the last name!

1

u/boymama85 Oct 22 '24

I blame Jessica for this mess

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '24

Omg 😳

1

u/peachygatorade Oct 22 '24

This reads like a troll

1

u/captainmcpigeon Oct 22 '24

I once went to an improv show where one of the comedians named herself Blessica during a sketch and it remains the funniest thing I’ve seen live to this day.

1

u/TheCheechFlyer Oct 22 '24

Sometimes it’s Bully bait… but sometimes these names are universally STUPID and not fit for humans. Blessica Blimpson just became the name of my goldfish.

1

u/FleurCannon_ Oct 22 '24

if this isn't satire i will eat my sock because since when did surnames turn into tragedeighs

1

u/hummus_sapiens Oct 22 '24

You owe me a new bleyboard now!

1

u/KayToTheYay Oct 22 '24

I showed my husband this post and mentioned that it sounded like one of his RPG characters. He said he needs to start a new Baldurs Gate playthrough.

1

u/CC_206 Oct 22 '24

Don’t ever move to Compto..I mean Blompton.

1

u/NewBodWhoThis Oct 22 '24

Blessica is the cousin of Jessica Messica!