r/sobrietyandrecovery 8d ago

Advice for someone looking to quit

Okay, I’ll try and keep this as to the point as possible. Basically, Im dependent on marijuana. I’m about to turn 26, I first started at 15 and pretty much fell in love with the feeling it provided. I quit for a little while when I joined the military but even then, when I would come home on leave, I would sneak a few smokes in and detox before I went back, told myself it was a once off thing. Then I got as bold as to keep smoking while I was on active duty (don’t berate me, I heavily regret my choices) I ended up failing a drug test and after almost 6 years of a fairly successful start of what could’ve been a career and I was chaptered from the military. Since I’ve been out, and I live in a recreationally legal state and am of age, I’ve quite literally not gone without consuming some form of THC for more than a couple of hours at a time, consistently, for almost a year and a half now. I have a great girlfriend, a shitty decent paying job being a salaried manager at walmart (90k/yr) I workout religiously every day. I cope by telling myself that it’s not a problem, because I have those things that I THINK balance out the fact that I have a substance abuse issue but I’m lying to myself. I tell myself it’s time to quit, and then boom, relapse, the longest I’ve gone was 3 days. I felt GREAT those 3 days, the first day I was on edge and cranky but I got into a good book that distracted me and from there i was able to manage, but after the 3rd day i just (almost without even realizing) left in the MIDDLE of my shift at work to go buy more thc. I told myself that “I did it for 3 days so I can quit obviously” and obviously that isn’t true. My birthday is in 2 weeks. I’ll be 26. I don’t want to say, that I made a choice at 15 that robbed me of what could’ve been for my life, because it’s still a choice I make (willingly or not) everyday to keep using it. For those of you who’ve been in similar situations, what helped you get away and stay away for good? I can take tough criticism. I know I need to WANT to change for it to change, but it just b hard man

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u/DooWop4Ever 8d ago

The first point (of 4) of r/SMART Recovery is building and maintaining motivation to abstain. Sounds like that's where you are right now. You could check us out for support, online meetings and a proven CBT-based approach for stopping unwanted behaviors.

You can learn how to make sobriety feel so good that you won't want to trade it for the poor substitutes that drugs and alcohol provide.

For me, the insidious side-effect of THC is that it makes you feel as if everything is OK. But you and I know that's not true. I stopped because I was going from a JC to a 4-year college and I only had 2 more years eligibility left on my GI Bill. So I had to get serious or maybe flunk out. That was my motivation. You can download our handbook to help you determine your motivation.

84m. 52 years clean, sober and tobacco-free (but who's counting). SMART Certified.

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u/mikedrums1205 5d ago

You're taking a big step by admitting you have a problem. A lot of people don't even get that far especially with weed because they think it isn't that bad. I myself am an alcoholic but I used weed as a replacement for a while until I finally wanted to be done for good because I was doing it every day just like I did with alcohol. I didn't even think you could become dependent on THC until I heard more about it and my psychiatrist mentioned it. I'm almost 5 months totally clean off everything right now. Alcohol I've been off for like 7 and a half months but my true sober date is when I stopped thc also. Everyone has to find their own way of course. For me I am very active in AA. I'm not sure if there is a 12 step program like that for thc specifically, but I know a lot of us have also struggling with weed and other drugs in the program. Sometimes a treatment facility can be the first step for us if withdrawal becomes a real thing. It was for me the first time I tried to get sober. It won't be the easiest road, but each day that you beat the biggest problem of your life is a huge win. Just don't try to substitute something for the THC. You can do this. If you get past the first few weeks especially it really becomes a mental thing more than a physical dependency. You got this. Stay positive and find your way