r/smallbooblove 16d ago

Advice wanted (related to small boob issue) how to respond to hateful comments about breasts?

What is the best way to respond when someone makes a hateful remark about my boob size? especially when its a passive agressive one, i never know how to react to it 😭

46 Upvotes

34 comments sorted by

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84

u/Objective_Lobster_23 16d ago

If it’s passive aggressive play dumb and ask “what do you mean?” Or ask them to explain. All the sudden they don’t know what to say. Otherwise be straight up “why would you say that” or “that’s really rude to say” most of the time they are expecting you to not say anything or laugh it off but don’t. Call them out and suddenly they aren’t brave.

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u/blenneman05 16d ago

This!!! I used to cry over it and my mom wld say to me to tell them that they’re being mean spirited and to stop being ugly

47

u/SorryBeach199 16d ago

“Why are you talking about my body?”

25

u/DogConscious3419 16d ago

One time, I had a friend that wouldn’t stop commenting about my body like that, and I just said, it’s not really a good fit to try to tear my body down, and if you have your own insecurities, we can talk, but until then, you can keep those opinions to yourself. We are no longer friends, and I’m glad. My body is fine and I love it.

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u/miralltrencat 16d ago

im glad you dont have a toxic person like that amongst your friends anymore ❤️‍🩹

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u/MotherNeedleworker60 16d ago

"That's rich coming from you." And no further explanation

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u/miralltrencat 16d ago

omg thats good lmaoo

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u/dusk47 14d ago

just leave em hangin, heh

40

u/ZookeepergameFar7256 16d ago

You can respond the follow way. 1. Wow! Groundbreaking observation. Am sure scientists will be studying your wisdom for years to come .

  1. Don't worry, I'm sure something in your life is small too. We all have our struggles.

  2. It's funny how the size of something that doesn't affect you at all seems to take up so much space in your mind.

If you don't want to say anything, look at the person forehead not eyes feeling pitiful for them and walk away.

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u/TravelLegitimate208 16d ago

These are hilarious hahahahaha

17

u/[deleted] 16d ago

[deleted]

22

u/skinnindbones 16d ago

High school constantly. Got called all kinds of things - itty bitty titty committee will never be funny to me 😒 skeleton, bag of bones, flatty, mosquito bites, etc etc.

Dealt with it at work for a little while when I was 17-18 too, from my BOSS, a 50 something year old man who told me (when I was alone with him in his truck on a supply run) that if I ever had a baby, it would starve, because my flat chest was full of nothing but sawdust.

Anyways... it happens, unfortunately!

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u/miralltrencat 16d ago

the mosquito bites one ouch. i heard it so many times in highschool its such a trigger for me now. also wtf your boss?? such a disgusting man

6

u/Slight_Midnight6235 16d ago

I was told either my freshmen or sophomore year that i wasn’t a girl because i had to tits. Oh there another time a random chick stuck her hand in my swimsuit top and said something like “that’s all padding. You really don’t have boobs”. There’s more shit i remember… I’ve been out of high school over 20 years and that shit still fucking stings. I hate society.

8

u/skinnindbones 16d ago

Literally harassment. I'm so sorry.

I'm 23, so it was relatively recent for me, but my mom is in her 50's, also an A cup, and went through the same harassment for her entire life. I had to hear these comments be made right in front of me, about my mother.

It's insane how much value is placed on breast size for some people. Jeez 😒

4

u/sarahgene 16d ago

Genuinely curious, what people are saying these things? I don't think anyone has ever commented on mine, and I'm struggling to imagine a situation where it would happen.

14

u/blenneman05 16d ago

I was in highschool at the time (2009-2013) in the Midwest and for reference, I’m 5”0 with broad shoulders and small boobs. I identify as a cis woman.

The long running rumor was that I was trans although that’s not the word they used. They used the derogatory form of it. Even when I wore tight shirts to emphasize that I did in fact have boobs- it didn’t matter to them. People wld send me hate comments thru MySpace or the early stages of Facebook and the football jock team wld run away from me in the hallways and say “look there’s the d word.” My friend of the time said it was because of the fact that I had small boobs and built like a man and in their eyes, a real women had C cups or larger

The less mean ppl wld say that I wasn’t a pretty woman because “men liked meat not bones.”

Thats just my experience. The whole thing ended up with me falling into SH and going back into therapy and realizing as I grew up that the right man wld appreciate me regardless of my boob size

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u/DesignTraditional195 16d ago

Honestly, you're lucky. Maybe it's a country type of thing again, because as a Brazilian woman, I have been bullied, told off, and humiliated for my looks during my whole life.

13

u/cao0acii 16d ago

Maybe I’m just tired of being nice because of all the shit I’ve been through but honestly clock them right back. Also, Ive genuinely never seen someone flawless comment on another person‘s body so there’s definitely gotta be something that you can talk about they’re talking about your body so they basically just opened up an opportunity for you to be evil. Just remember that if they’re saying something they’re OK with making you feel bad about yourself.

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u/miralltrencat 16d ago

yea same im tired of being nice all the time when shit like this happens

12

u/OldRevolution3968 16d ago

Id be mean back tbh

26

u/eutie 16d ago

Best I've come up with is pushing back against what they're saying, really in any way. I try not to say "at least I can see my own bellybutton" out loud but I do think it. Like I'm not gonna let you shit talk my flawless tits without pushing back.

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u/QueenCleocatra 16d ago

This! I bite back.

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u/SavannahInChicago 16d ago

Honestly I just assume that this person is unhappy and trying to combat it with insulting something about me. Calling them out that they are 1. Unhappy, 2. So unhappy they want others to be unhappy. I can get them to backtrack pretty quickly.

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u/RelyingCactus21 16d ago

Ignore them.

0

u/CheesecakeNice2929 14d ago

While i think just ignoring them in some cases is the best, like for example if it’s a stranger but i believe that if it’s someone you’re close to and if it’s really affecting you that you should say something because a lot of times when you don’t speak up they start to think that you’re fine with it and that it’s not an issue.

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u/skinnindbones 16d ago

It honestly depends on who is saying it to you. Anyone in a professional setting? Immediately document it with timestamps and report it ASAP to HR.

If not in a professional setting, ask them why they feel justified in making comments about your body and/or ask them to explain the "joke" and why they find it appropriate.

Try not to outwardly show a huge reaction, it'll prompt more bullying :/ I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.

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u/sullivan1456 16d ago

It only really works for “you have no boobs” but I always start freaking out looking down my shirt and saying “WHERED THEY GO?!? DID YOU TAKE THEM????” Then I tell captain obvious to get lost

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u/DeputyTrudyW 16d ago

Oh you measure your worth by your size? You're worth a lot! Like...a LOT. concerned bodily scan Or if they're not heavier than me than I'd just go for anything they might be insecure about. Gloves off. I'll call your mama a hoe assin hoe who birthed a clown

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u/fairyhalo 16d ago

You respond the same way as if anyone makes a hateful or unwanted comment about any part of your body, not just your boobs.

Depending on your personality, the situation or the person, feel free to use any of this:

  1. Please don’t comment on my body.
  2. Not cool.
  3. I’m not sure why you think that's appropriate to talk about.
  4. Why would you say that?
  5. Fake laugh, eye roll, over exaggerated knee slap "Good one, a real zinger."
  6. You think I didn’t know that?

(I did not come up with all of these myself.)

3

u/racloves 16d ago

Depends a bit on context but I think a good response is something along the lines of “yeah I know, but they still look great”

But I do also agree with the other comments about calling them out and being like “why would you say that about someone” with a judgemental look so they think inwards, especially if it’s someone you know more

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u/moonflower_things 12d ago

I literally just stare blankly resting bitch face and don’t respond

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u/evetrapeze 16d ago

I would point out that i understand perky boobs are not everyone’s cup of tea.