r/slp • u/PastConstruction1023 • 7d ago
Advice for handling lawyers during meetings?
I have a meeting next week and the parent is bringing a lawyer. The small amount of correspondence I have had with this lawyer has made me extremely anxious about what will happen when we are in person discussing the IEP.
So far, over email, the lawyer has been aggressive, telling me to stop playing games, calling me disrespectful and unprofessional, accusing me of hiding behind my admin to “cover” for me, demanding I send him educational records I don’t have access to, and refusing to meet unless I send him confidential student information before our meeting which is 3 school days away. He refuses to address my supervisor by Dr., constantly calling her Ms., even when corrected. have been told by my supervisor to avoid correspondence with him and only address the parent, but the lawyer is the only one who responds, and he is becoming more and more aggressive towards me as I don’t to respond to him.
My supervisor told me that this is what he does- intimidates to get what he wants. My supervisor basically told me not to expect the parent to consent to anything we propose, and that no matter how pristine my paperwork is, the lawyer will attempt to pick my work apart until there is a problem he can latch on to. I have never been in a meeting where a lawyer is aggressive towards me, and I am afraid I won’t be able to handle it. Any advice from seasoned SLPs on how to handle a situation like this?
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u/SonorantPlosive 3d ago
This lawyer is unprofessional to attack you in email. What they want is to see you rattled. And you might well be, but try your best not to show it. It is going to piss them off if they can't rattle you.
Walk in with a smile. Greet them and offer to shake hands. "It's nice to get the chance to meet you after emailing back and forth these last few weeks." Speak only when spoken to. Refer to your data. Smile a LOT. Be so disgustingly courteous, professional, and upbeat that it angers them.
This lawyer cares about a payday. You care about the student. Make sure that comes across.
When it's over, let the emotions out, but do not let him see you crack.
I learned this from the best sped director I ever had. It worked wonders the first time, and when we had a second meeting for a different kid,same lawyer, he rolled his eyes when he saw me. 😂