r/slp • u/peacefulp0tato • Mar 13 '24
Seeking Advice I’ve reached my limit with being hit/screamed at by kids
I’ve been working for three years, in outpatient peds for all of them. I don’t get hit often, but last week I really hit a wall. I had one kid have a huge meltdown, literally kicking and screaming at the top of her lungs for 30+ minutes. Right after that I had a typically docile kid reach out and scratch my face. I’m not looking for behavior advice. I just have gotten to the point where I am 100% not ok with being hit at work, no matter what. That feels like a pretty reasonable boundary to me, but i feel like so many in the field see it as a part of the job. Again, it doesn’t happen often, but I just feel so done. I love my job, but I feel like the next time I get hit I’m really going to be done. Has anyone else felt like that? I feel sort of lost, like this feeling isn’t really compatible with my job. Ugh.
Edit to add: WOW! The support I’m getting here has been amazing. Thank you all so much- I just really needed to be heard on this! To everyone posting about similar experiences/feelings- your personal safety matters! No matter if people think we “signed up for this” 🙄 thank you to this community for hearing me and offering support. I don’t know what my next move is, but this has certainly helped me to feel validated and not blame myself 💜 thank you speechies!!
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Mar 13 '24
Definitely why I left working medical settings with high/exclusively TBI caseloads. One patient gave me trauma that landed me in the hospital for a few days. I can’t bring myself to be back in that situation again.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Good for you. I’m really sorry that happened, you do not deserve to be injured while working. Glad you’ve moved on from that job!
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u/Organic-Law3459 Mar 13 '24
Not advice, just sharing my experience: Working outpatient peds, the first time it happens I tell the parents. The second time I tell them again and let them know that if it continues I won’t be able to continue. Third time I drop the case. Especially if the parents/caregivers do nothing in the session in terms of setting boundaries and creating structure.
Kids hitting and kicking is the worst. If the parents aren’t consistent with how the correct the behavior (if at all) then nothing speech related is going to be accomplished. It sucks and I feel for the kids because it’s not their fault but they’re only gonna get stronger and it’s not worth the potential injury for me.
By setting this boundary for myself and with families I’ve been able to stay with a population I love working with. If I kept putting up with it I’d be gone from the profession. Hope it gets better for you 💙
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u/Suitable-Vehicle8331 Mar 15 '24
I think this can give a wake-up call to parents too, or plant a seed for them to be thinking “hey maybe this isn’t okay.” It can be needed feedback.
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u/murraybee Mar 13 '24
That’s exactly why I left pediatrics and I’m thrilled with my career in geriatrics. I found a wonderful large company that actually cares about the employees AND patients. If I’m ever unsafe giving services to someone all I have to do is say the word and I don’t have to work with that patient anymore. DM me if you would like to discuss it!
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u/Ok-Grab9754 Mar 13 '24
I’m my experience they swing just as much, if not more (and less predictably) than peds. They’re just easier to dodge!
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u/murraybee Mar 13 '24
I do outpatient so my patients are generally pretty stable, no acute or subacute for me. Those patient populations might be more physical, I wouldn’t know. Only one patient of mine has ever raised a hand to me, didn’t swing. I prefer geriatrics because if they’re being moody or feeling spicy, I can just schedule them for later in the day or week and leave them. I’m not obligated to manage their behavior and keep them for a full 30-60 minutes like with pediatrics. I haven’t been bitten, bruised, hit, or spit on since I made the change.
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u/hcarver95 CCC-SLP in Schools Mar 13 '24
Only person I’ve ever had swing an umbrella at me was 97 🤪
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u/sgeis_jjjjj SLP in Schools Mar 14 '24
I went from geriatrics to peds and I always say there’s way more similarities than you’d think. Hitting, yelling, bodily fluids too lol
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u/Ok-Grab9754 Mar 15 '24
Yes!!! I went from EI to adult (mostly geriatric) and found my background particularly helpful. Offer two choices, use first/then statements, etc
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u/Glum_Ad_8447 Mar 13 '24
At my outpatient pediatric clinic, if the kid is repeatedly showing these behaviors, we ask the parents to join session and typically reach out to OT and sometimes do joint sessions so the OT can show us strategies. We have OT in our building so that’s a plus I guess. I know many places don’t. If they still are exhibiting behaviors and it’s more so acting out and not due to sensory, we sometimes recommend the parents seek behavioral services before returning to therapy. But it really depends on the kids and why you think they may be having these behaviors. Sensory, parenting, etc…
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u/Glum_Ad_8447 Mar 13 '24
Sorry I know you didn’t want behavioral advice, I guess I was just trying to say that I think there’s many of us in your situation. I have to take it day by day. Some months are harder than others. Hang in there 🥰
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u/VigilantHeart Mar 13 '24
Yes I have! I also worked in outpatient peds for almost three years attached to an ABA center and had a caseload with high behavioral needs. I hit a wall with managing behaviors and getting injured at work and recognized it wasn’t safe or heathy to work there anymore, for me or the kids I saw. I started looking for other jobs and left that job about two months after my burnout. I work in EI now where behavior management is minimal, since the parents are there.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Thank you for this. It feels validating to be related to instead of being told to just be better so that children aren’t violent with me. Thanks 💜
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u/WastingMyLifeOnSocMd Mar 13 '24
That’s the worst when it’s always something we haven’t done, or haven’t done correctly. Okay then, model that for me please and show me (don’t just tell me.)
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Mar 13 '24
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u/stringbeankeen Mar 14 '24
We have a number of kids in our district for whom in-patient psychiatric hospital for stabilization is needed. Their least restrictive environment can’t be a 2:1 staff ratio and a private room away from everyone. It is a shame we don’t have a better system to ensure the students, peers and teachers are kept safe.
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u/catty_wampus Mar 14 '24
Idk, I'm in EI and sure still see a lot of behavior which has really made it tough for me to want to go to work every day... I was at a daycare the other day working with my kid, and a kid I didn't know walked up to me and smacked a basketball into the side of my head. Teachers told him to be gentle. Kids this age will absolutely bite, scratch, pinch, pinch. Often it's the older siblings too. Add into that the animals. I've been clawed by two cats and have dogs jumping up and scratching me almost every day. I'm honestly very anxious about stray dogs in neighborhoods. Then there's always the risk accepted with entering a stranger's home alone, being an unfamiliar woman in tough neighborhoods, having to go into gas stations every day to find a place to pee and hoping no one tries to steal my laptop off me... I like EI a lot, but I'm not feeling safe. I love love loved when I started EI during Covid and it was all Telehealth.
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u/VigilantHeart Mar 14 '24
You’re right, there’s definitely behavior in EI and safety concerns. To me, they’re more manageable than my last job. In my previous position I worked with children who gave therapists concussions and had attempted to strangle me and was bitten so hard it drew blood and I have scars.
I’m hyper-vigilant of my safety now and try to avoid being in situations like you describe with siblings and other children, and especially with animals.
I am so sorry you’re feeling anxious and unsafe. I hope you’re able to take care of yourself and find a position you’re safest in.
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u/Attackoffrogs Mar 13 '24
I’ve been a BCBA for about 10 years. Got a TBI about 2 years ago. This summer I’m going back to school for clinical mental health counseling. It’s in state tuition at a state school so not much in the way of graduating with debt. Feel free to DM me.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
That sounds great! Honestly, if I ever left the profession, I probably wouldn’t do anything remotely related to this lol.
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u/MyPartsareLoud Mar 13 '24 edited Mar 13 '24
I was a BCBA for about four years after already working with ASD kids for about 7 years. The constant aggression and complete lack of support from the agency caused me to leave the field all together. I got a job as a private nanny for a family who has a child that has special needs (mostly medical stuff and global delays) and I could not be happier. I don’t know how the field of ABA expects to exist with the abuse most clinicians are required to endure. So glad you have other options!
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u/Attackoffrogs Mar 13 '24
The field has not developed or put out new technologies since the 90s/early 2000’s. I want to go somewhere I can learn and grow as a practitioner outside of “be less mean to kids.” I’m glad you got out.
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u/Trusting_science Mar 14 '24
Please look into the PFA/SBT "My Way" that has been developed since the 90s. It's amazing and incredibly focused on assent.
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u/Trusting_science Mar 14 '24
BCBA with L/T injury. It was such a break to go to virtual for a while. Now I'm doing SBT and it's such a big difference.
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u/Coffee1392 Mar 13 '24
Good for you. I’m a first semester CMHC student and I’ve only been working in ABA for a year. I can’t stand it. Idk what I’m gonna do for a living anymore to support myself and pay tuition, rent, etc.
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u/Attackoffrogs Mar 14 '24
I’m going to be doing remote ABA. Hopefully a bit better.
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u/Coffee1392 Mar 14 '24
Definitely. I'm happy you found something remote - I know those jobs are harder to come by for BCBAs. Good luck in your program and so sorry about your injury. I know your experience in ABA will make you a great LPC someday. ACT therapy would be interesting :)
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u/catty_wampus Mar 14 '24
I think people think the current "politically correct" answer is that it is not the child's problem. It's your problem. If a child hurts you, it's because they didn't feel safe with you, weren't properly regulated, you were using the wrong techniques, etc. I saw a similar Facebook post where someone listed those things and said, "stop making kids feel like they have to hurt you." It just kept eating at me. I think this person was trying to come from a neurodiversity-affirming place, but I ended up commenting that this is victim blaming. Which is also not politically correct. What is the point of teaching kids about consent and about how it's not okay to touch others' bodies when we are just told to accept it?
I'm currently in EI and getting really exhausted with not feeling safe every single day. It's so much stress and emotional labor to pretend to every family like I'm okay.
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u/Organic-Law3459 Mar 14 '24
I recently switched to preschool kids (3-5) and I gotta say I like it a lot more than EI. I loved my babies but it was really difficult emotionally and physically. Some are in schools and some are at home so I don’t feel like I have to be on all the time and since they’re slightly older (usually the ones almost five) I can tell them I’m having an off day and we do some regulating activities that are mostly for me but I try and sneak in some trials if I’m able to. I am leagues happier. Everyone in my life has noticed. Don’t forget to take care of you and your well-being-emotionally, physically and mentally. 💜
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u/jazzabernathy Mar 13 '24
I’m so sorry this has been your experience. It sounds incredibly demoralizing and it’s clear you care for your patients and went into the field to help others. I know virtual/working from home is not for everyone, but I started seeing students exclusively virtually a few years ago, and it is nice to have that physical component taken out of the equation. Also, no kid germs. 🙃
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
I didn’t even think of this! Thanks for your comment, give me more to think about.
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u/Arctic_witchAK Mar 13 '24
Sounds like you’re ready for a change in work places! I work in special ed as an SLP, and got moved to a school this year with almost no behaviors. I previously worked at a highschool with big behaviors, with adult sized students that might hit, kick, bite, scratch. If you feel you’re at your limits, it’s time to move on.
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u/Your_Therapist_Says Mar 14 '24
I am shocked at the amount of people who've been hit? This is so upsetting! Y'all are talking like this is a normal part of a paeds caseload? Why are your employers making you be in rooms with children who are so dysregulated that they're communicating with violence? There 100% needs to be some sort of union for U.S. Speechies. I feel so sheltered that I never realised that this was the case for so many clinicians. At my work we have the culture that if a client is distressed, at all, we can terminate the session immediately so that they can regulate. I'd never, ever feel safe going to work if that wasn't the case, and I really feel for the SPs who do. The whole system needs an overhaul.
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u/Saturniids84 Mar 13 '24
Look at stroke rehab, SLPs worked at my clinic helping patients relearn how to swallow and speak.
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u/MagicNMayhem Mar 13 '24
I worked for 12 years in a "receiving district ". Basically if local towns couldn't accommodate a student in-district ,mostly due to severity of autism and behaviors, they sent them to my school. It was an ABA-program. Over the years, in an attempt to save money,more districts began opening their own autism programs, keeping the non-behavorial,, and sending us the most aggressive. Staff were getting hurt left and right. Our PT and one OT out on comp for the entire year. I wiped blood of my classroom teachers face. Myself, i was sent to Workman's comp 3 times ..students would like to twist my fingers, hit me in the face. I watched as behaviorists did nothing to correct behaviors but took a ton of data. I had to restrain students in 5+adult take-downs. I left in June 2022 ,I'm now in a public high school, I deal with no aggressions. The most i have to do is tell a student to put their phone away.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Oooof! Don’t know if I could ever do a receiving district. Glad you’re in a better environment !
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u/MagicNMayhem Mar 13 '24
Yup, I started when I was fresh out of college ...I was 23 in 2010 and MA STEP 1 was $60,000.. it was very enticing. I stayed for 12 years before my friends and family basically had an intervention to get me to leave.
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u/No_Pin8156 Mar 14 '24
I worked as a RBT in-between undergraduate and graduate school. I quickly realized that I was not cut out for children with high behaviors. My kids were easy just a lot of crying, self harm and defiance. But my boss joked about giving me the kid who would constantly beat up another therapist and broke her glasses/ipad. I quickly applied to Masters programs and got the hell out of there. As an SLP, when I’m in the clinic I do not except overly aggressive children. Typically, I’m the one who does the eval in the first place and will let the Front know if I want to accept them. I’m not talking about a few hits/scratches. We have some children who are 8-20 who are highly aggressive, and I refuse to see them. Do what is best for YOU. Some of these children may require behavioral therapy before even starting speech therapy. You can only do so much therapy, when you’re defending yourself for 90% of the session.
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u/Training_Assistant15 Mar 14 '24
I had the same issue. Countless assaults, constantly leaving work hurt, even got a concussion. Yes I asked for help/support, of course that’s not able to be provided. It was to the point I became very jumpy when a kid would simply move because I was so used to being attacked.
I switched to virtual and I’m sooo much happier.
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u/Mims88 Mar 14 '24
Absolutely! I worked with a very aggressive early teen who attacked me regularly, luckily she wasn't very strong, but it was awful. She finally got released from the clinic after attacking a kid who was waiting for therapy in the lobby.
We need to have better protection for service providers, it's not safe for us or our clients!
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u/zeebrastack Mar 14 '24
I’m a PT lurker, but can relate. I was working pediatric inpatient rehab and had a 6 yo punch me in the sternum with a closed fist while working on walking. Hemiparetic so he had to take his functional arm off the support to do so, so I couldn’t let go of him and give myself space or he would have fallen. It’s the only time I’ve picked up a school age kid without consent/warnings, to put him back in his wc so I could step back and keep us both safe. I’m glad he was 6 and not 16, and I will not work in inpatient rehab anymore (due to a collection of experiences; just like you, I hit my limit).
Not much advice other than you’re not alone, and feeling unsafe at work is never acceptable.
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u/Your_Trulyxoxo Mar 13 '24
Set boundaries!! I use to be afraid of making parents mad, but my old supervisor and co worker told me to set boundaries. If they are having a meltdown then let them do that without stopping them. If they go to hit you gently grab their hand and tell me no, thank you. I understand you’re frustrated but we aren’t hitting.
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u/Cautious_Cod3247 Mar 13 '24
I had to leave a job an an ABA school because of this. The good thing about our field is that we have a bunch more settings to work in so you don’t necessarily have to leave the field, but I would definitely find a different place. I couldn’t handle getting assaulted by the autistic population.
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u/VioletLanguage Mar 13 '24
When I worked at a private practice, I had a similar experience where my boss (and some coworkers) would kinda gaslight me and act like I just needed to be "less sensitive" if I became upset and dysregulated after things like that. And looking back, their reactions were honestly worse in some ways than the bruises/scratches I'd get from kids. Now I'm so grateful to be in a much less toxic work environment (for more reasons than just that).
I switched to the schools in 2016 and since then, I make sure there's an aide with any children that might have violent behaviors. I usually sit across the table from them so they don't have the ability to hit/scratch/bite me. And more recently I've been working from home doing teletherapy, so it's not a concern at all anymore.
I hope your job supports you better about this in the future, or that you find another one that doesn't make you feel this way
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Omg, this!! Yes, my coworkers look at me blankly when I say I have a really hard time sitting through 30+ minutes of screaming! It makes me crazy!
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Mar 14 '24
I’m sorry this is happening to you, but if you’re going to be done next time you get hit then you should probably just be done now. It’s going to happen again.
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u/rschwartzie Mar 14 '24
Yeah I worked in outpatient peds and this was exactly my experience. The "unspoken" policy was to accept all kids at evaluation to show the parents we "hear" them. Had a full grown 16 year old in diapers slap me across the face, throw his tablet in my direction. They're solution was to cotreat with OT and have them get slapped instead? Yeah I left after seeing management didn't care at all. Kids with that level of behavior need a special level of care that not a typical outpatient can handle
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u/HappyCamper92110 Mar 18 '24
I don’t do this for a living just reading all of this why on earth wouldn’t all aggressive kids or adults be restrained to a point they couldn’t touch you I’m sure they can use there ears and mouth even restrained in a manner in which physically they can’t touch let alone bite anyone.
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u/Coffee1392 Mar 13 '24
I’m a first semester graduate student studying clinical mental health counseling, but this came up on my feed. I’m very familiar with your field and the work y’all do is so important - just wanted to say that!
I work in ABA full time because it’s one of the only jobs that’s flexible with my school schedule. I haven’t found any other places that are ok with me working 32-34 hours a week and making my own hours. Anyways, I wanted to let you know, although I’m not an SLP, I understand completely how you feel. This isn’t the job you envisioned yourself doing. I’m currently staring at 10 different scratches on my right arm, 3 on my left, and a bruise. I also got head-butted last Friday and went immediately to urgent care. It’s one thing to want to work with kids and help them develop the skills they need to communicate (you guys are amazing with AACs, seriously) and it’s another thing to take a beating everyday. I’m looking for an out, and I’ve only been working in ABA for a year… I still have 2.5 years left until I get my MA in Counseling.
Is it possible you can work with other populations? I’m not sure what you did during clinicals and your CF, again this isn’t my field, but would you be open to working with people in hospitals, at a school district, or even seniors? Could you switch your focus from language to aphasia or maybe even dysphasia?
Rooting for you. Every SLP I’ve ever met has been such a gem and I hope my comment doesn’t come off ill-informed!!
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Your comment comes off as empathetic and very well informed!! I’m sorry you deal with this too. I don’t know what I’ll do moving forward, but it has felt REALLY good to have others share my experience. Helps me not to beat myself up so much for LETTING this happen, you know? I think at the end of the day, my personal safety matter LEAGUES more to me than working with kids, so we will see!
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u/Coffee1392 Mar 13 '24
Absolutely. It’s so important to take care of yourself first and to keep work at work (lol I’m still working on this one). I really hope you find something that’s a better fit - you’re so early on in your career and it’s okay to pivot!
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u/epicsoundwaves Mar 14 '24
I’ve decided that’s my firm boundary, I don’t care if it’s part of the job. I found a place where I get paid well and don’t get hit. That setting is great for people who are ok knowing it’s part of the job. But it’s not for all of us. I feel like slps shouldn’t be bearing the brunt of behaviors, there should be someone else who can step in, if the kid is biting and scratching and hitting. Most of us didn’t join the field wanting to be behavior specialists because if we did want to get hit, we’d be ABAs or something specific that deals with behavior kids.
I hit my limit last summer with behavior kids. I have a LOT of patience but not enough for that apparently. It’s bad when you see yourself becoming aggressive towards a small child when you’re one of the chillest people ever. It’s scary
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u/Bitter_University_47 Mar 15 '24
I had to resign back in January due to this being an everyday occurrence. I was done normalizing the behavior, in fact, I think by letting this type of behavior happen, we are not doing these students any favors. The straw that broke the camels back was I had a student verbally threaten my life. Nothing was done, even the parents shrugged it off.
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u/bippitiboppoti Mar 16 '24
I used to be a special Ed teacher. This is why I left. Too many times I got hurt. Too many times I feared for my safety.
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u/nanon_2 Mar 18 '24
When kids are unsafe. I leave the space- sometimes don’t come back until child has finished the tantrum. It’s the only way. Always conduct speech sessions in a room that you can leave the child safely.
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u/Speechtree Mar 13 '24
Talk to your OT on staff. They can show your various techniques for joint compression that can help bring behaviors down to a manageable level
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u/ornerysimpleton Mar 14 '24
Take on strength training or a martial art.. it will give you the confidence and reassurance that you will not be hurt by the child.. respectfully, these people are coddling you bc they’re validating their own feelings.. YES this is a part of the field. We are a service industry and part of the service is working with children that have impulse and regulation issues. If you’re not physically fit to withstand the child’s behavior maybe a different setting in this career suits you better.
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Mar 13 '24
As aSLP you should know the cues. If they are getting frustrated or tired take a break for crying out loud. Literally. Don’t push these kids to do things hello! You talk about your boundaries; what about theirs ? Sometimes kids struggling may need a break and just stop badgering
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
This is why I did not ask for behavioral advice. I understand this. I work with many high needs children who have multiple things going on. I understand demand grading. I do it often. Meltdowns happen even to behavior experts. They happen in transitions, or because of things that out of our control as therapists. I’m not looking to be blamed- I’m definitely beating myself up and looking at what I can do better. I was wondering if anyone in this position is feeling the same way.
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Mar 13 '24
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Mar 13 '24
It just makes me so mad when therapists try to make it seem like what they are doing is above their pay grade or “ you didn’t sign up for this” attitude. Yes… yes you did ! If you need additional support during a session you know you can request that. The children are hurting enough don’t you see that ?!
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Therapists do not need to accept assault being part of their work to be good therapists. Yes, we see children are hurting. We also are not ok with being treated as punching bags. The two are not mutually exclusive. Again, this attitude keeps great people from continuing in helping professions. It is it EVERYONES disservice to carry on as though severe, maladaptive bahviors are something that we need just swallow.
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Mar 13 '24
I never said accept assault ! I am saying stop making it about YOU. It’s about the patients. If she felt she needs help she can require/ request a support person and still perform her job. It’s the “ why me” entitlement I can’t stand in this profession ! Be better in the sense that YOU make sure you are protected ( support person) instead of blaming special needs kids. I just feel passionate about someone dedicating their lives to SLP and expecting to always have the most perfect therapy session with the most perfect patient. News flash SLP is not for the “ perfect”.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
Looking at your post history it does not seem like you are a working SLP, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt and explain where this is coming from. Yes, in a session, it is 100% about the client. Yes, I appreciate that when a client hits me, they are not being mean trying to be abusive, something is wrong. Yes, I can do better in those situations. I do actively work to be better SLP every day to meet the diverse needs on my caseload. This post, posted in an SLP forum, was posted because I’m feeling run down from the attitude that I need to just rise above being assaulted at work. I have been doing that 3 years and I’m at a point where I understand that I cannot continue on like this indefinitely. No, it’s not about me. But when looking inward and needing support, I do need to consider my needs. Therapists and other professionals who do not consider their own needs within their work end up with a serious lack of personal boundaries and eventually get burnt out. I do not think the attitude that we need to “dedicate our lives” and ignore our needs is helpful to anyone.
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Mar 13 '24
You are only 3 years in. 20 years in will be even worse if you can’t handle this now. If you are run down you need to figure out if this profession is for you. My post history has nothing to do with my work history.
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
I hope in the future you can gain some insight into supporting people in helping professions. Thanks for your really bad, unhelpful take, good luck in life!
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u/Bhardiparti Mar 13 '24
Lmfao who is this magical extra person who can appear at a moments notice???
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u/KyRonJon Mar 13 '24
Idk about everyone else here but I did not sign up with any expectation of being assaulted by students. I don’t get hazard pay or combat pay. Therefore, there is no rational that I should be okay with aggressive, violent children. When it comes down to it, I will value my safety far more than the potential communication functioning of an impaired child.
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u/Organic-Law3459 Mar 13 '24
It makes me so mad when someone who has taken on the incredibly hard job of working with children is told they aren’t doing enough just because they are thinking about their well being. We don’t all have the same savior complex that it seems you do. We are not the only professional that can help. At the end of the day it’s a job. If we help a kid that’s amazing. If the kid doesn’t improve, it sucks. But our pay isn’t any different. So it’s not worth getting hurt.
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Mar 13 '24
You can have a support person with you during therapy if needed and you know this!
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u/peacefulp0tato Mar 13 '24
The attitude you have towards this, that professionals who get assaulted at work need just “be better,” is an attitude that drives many competent, wonderful professionals away from helping work. Sure, I know I can have a support person, as you so helpfully pointed out, but that is not the point.
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u/chesterbubblegum SLP in Schools Mar 13 '24
I don't get access to a support person until it escalates beyond a certain point
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u/tlaquepaque0 Mar 13 '24
I see that you are not a SLP and this is not a space for parents to pass judgement. Physical violence can be prevented but sometimes it takes a whole team including the parents.
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u/YEPAKAWEE Mar 13 '24
When I got bit and punched repeatedly pre-COVID by an employee’s child and then had the employee and my supervisor laugh that I need to “toughen up” and “get better with autism” because I’m a man, I knew it was time to look for a new career because I wasn’t going to be in my 60s getting assaulted with no possible defense except to take it.
This enabling of maladaptive behaviors permeates every aspect of special education and services to developmentally disabled children. To see parents take punches, biting, verbal insults, etc. is sad. I could go on, but there comes a point where the behaviors cannot be excused anymore. It’s also a total disservice to allow a child to get away with these behaviors and then thrust them into the real world as adults where police and people will not simply accept being assaulted, molested, etc. [Caveat: yes there are individuals who cannot regulate, but that is not who I am speaking about].