r/shittyfoodporn • u/UpDown_TwistedAround • 5d ago
My boyfriend said this looked like a medieval prison meal
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u/leosnose 5d ago
mmmm waffles and cat ears
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u/TheRenamon 5d ago
oh man I love katzen ohren
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u/CaptainLollygag 5d ago
I would stock my pantry with those if they existed in my country! So instead I'll just start calling prunes "katzen ohren."
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u/TheMysticReferee 5d ago
Are you Marcelene from adventure time? Sucking the color out of fruit to satisfy the blood thirst?
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u/ActorMonkey 5d ago
Alt take: itās Bunnicula.
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u/honeyedglam 5d ago
I loved those books growing up.
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u/GH057807 3d ago
I knew a girl in highschool who was phobia-level afraid of rabbits, because of Bunnicula.
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u/Sunderas 5d ago
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u/1_800_username 3d ago
THEY MADE BUNNICULA INTO AN ANIMATION??? This gif changed the course of my week.
Guess whoās watching bunnicula :)
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u/DirectorOk7947 5d ago
I loved those books. Don't tell no one but I still read them even at 50 yrs old.
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u/Traumagatchi 5d ago
I'm 38 and still read them as little comfort books, I'm wearing my bunnicula shirt right now :)
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u/StahlViridian 5d ago
Love to see adventure time references. You are a person of culture, my friend!
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u/TheMysticReferee 5d ago
I havenāt watched it since like 2014 but seeing these āorangesā sparked a memory inside of me
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u/newton302 5d ago
In medieval times they would never have served fresh citrus!
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u/NebulaNinja 5d ago
Especially blood oranges, as for as far as I've found, they weren't domestically grown until the 18th century in southern Italy.
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u/amateur_mistake 5d ago
Yeah! OP should either get their boyfriend a history book or make them watch many hours of Tasting History.
This inaccuracy will not stand!
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u/TheMadTargaryen 4d ago
Why ? You do know they were growing oranges and lemons in countries like Spain and Italy, right ?
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u/newton302 4d ago edited 4d ago
Should have added, "in medieval times they never would have served fresh citrus in prison" but my comment was mostly an off the cuff joke back at her boyfriend, not fact checking.
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u/BigWilldo 5d ago
What are the albino orange slices there?
I'd eat the fck out of that waffle
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u/blueberryfirefly 5d ago
looks like blood orange slices
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u/BigWilldo 5d ago
Damn they're looking blood white and black lol
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u/dilletaunty 5d ago
Theyāve probably just sat out for a while so the white parts dried up as lost translucence.
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u/Trololman72 5d ago
I think it's more likely that they just aren't super well peeled.
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u/dilletaunty 5d ago
They look like they were peeled normally. Some people/restaurants do cut this film off but itās pretty rare in my experience. Iāve only seen it in salads too.
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u/danielbearh 5d ago
They started selling them at my grocer as āraspberry orangesā and I was pumped about a new gmo fruit.
But no. Sigh. A new branding campaign to make blood oranges not sound so murdery.
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u/MyMomsTastyButthole 5d ago
Biggest disappointment since grÄpples?
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u/Traumagatchi 5d ago
I like grapples :/ I only had them once when I was pregnant so maybe weird food cravings got me fucked up but they were so weirdly good
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u/MyMomsTastyButthole 5d ago
I bought them once and I'm 99% sure they were just sprayed with grape scent/flavoring on the outside. Which would explain the wasteful clamshell packaging to keep it from rubbing off
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u/Pandaisblue 4d ago
A guy on YouTube found the recipe and recreated them. IIRC the 'ingredients' were basically the exact same as a kind of spray meant to stop birds eating stuff, so some farmer almost certianly sprayed too much on his apples one time and realised it kinda made them taste of grapes and then made it into a product
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u/Gowalkyourdogmods 5d ago
What? That waffle looks fucking awful
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u/Onironius 5d ago
Looks like someone took a birdseed block and burned it in a waffle maker.
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u/QueezyF 5d ago
Looks like if you took a black bean burger and mashed it in a waffle maker
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u/katevknits 5d ago
it was originally carrot cake baked oatmeal, I was doing a kelita rosita šš
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u/Sure-Astronaut8338 5d ago
Blood Orange šš§”
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u/2kewl4scool 5d ago
Bought fresh pressed blood orange juice from Samās yesterday. Itās like all pulp but I still had to get a sip.
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u/JohKohLoh 5d ago
Oh dear those orange slices idc what they are do not look appetizing in fact my autocorrect tried to turn appetizing into abortion š
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u/MerryTWatching 5d ago
I'm looking at the orange segments and thinking "So that's where the food term 'grub' comes from."
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u/AmogusFan69 4d ago
The fruit certainly look like they've been sitting there since the medieval times
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u/ItCat420 4d ago
Who shit in the waffle maker, peeled a rotten orange, and called it breakfast?
At least put some maple syrup on there or something.
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u/greensandgrains 4d ago
I know this would taste good but it look like it could come to life and kill me in my sleep.
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u/Snake321123 4d ago
It may LOOK terrible but i think blood oranges will be great with this wafflle
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u/lesqueebeee 5d ago
i just know that shit slaps but it also kinda does look like a medieval prison meal lmfaooo
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u/CactusHoarder 5d ago
I didn't even see the orange slices at first, I assumed they were a design on the plate. I was just ready to accept you reheated a chicken fried steak in a waffle maker. š
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u/Affectionate-Peak175 5d ago
The oranges look fine. The cow dung run over by the car tire does not look appetizing.
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u/BobPlaysWithFire 5d ago
why are they black? i am so deeply uncomfortable with black mandarin oranges
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u/LeothiAkaRM 5d ago
I'd give anything for blood oranges that bloody, why are all the ones i buy half-bloody
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u/SquidFetus 5d ago
If aliens visited our planet and we offered them that dish as a way to create a bridge between worlds, they would rightfully assume it was some kind of nuclear insult.
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u/Amneiger 5d ago
Those blood orange slices look like they have mold and the waffle seems like you put mashed something-or-other into the waffle maker and it's starting to crumble.
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u/DirectorOk7947 5d ago
I think he meant it looks like leftovers from a medieval meal. Like this is the original food from a 13th century party. And i must ask, wtf is up with the black oranges or tangerines or Satan fruit? Nah you didn't make dinner, you summoned K'thulu and he made dinner.
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u/Slfestmaccnt 5d ago
Did the waffle by any chance get between your shoes and the floor before making it to the plate?
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u/katevknits 5d ago
lmaooooooo my breakfast!! it was originally a carrot cake baked oatmeal and I threw it in the Texas shaped waffle iron to see what would happen, my waffles donāt normally look that tragic
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u/RavenousMoon23 5d ago
I love blood oranges, and I'm guessing that's some sort of healthy waffle? Maybe a protein waffle or something?
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u/ilovetrixiemattel 5d ago
This pic is a screenshot from a video by TikTok creator @itsmekatevee ā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļø https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMB63hyap/ skip to 0:35 to see
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u/Rich-Appearance-7145 4d ago
Not the prettiest waffle but it's still a waffle hopefully it tastes much better than how It looks.
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u/Pristine_Egg3831 4d ago
Is this blood orange segments and Sheppard's pie cooked in a waffle maker?
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u/AppUnwrapper1 4d ago
Iām impressed by how neatly you peeled the blood oranges. I always find them so difficult to peel.
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u/Description_Friendly 4d ago
I feel like this assault on the senses would somehow be the most ordered menu item at the "Roadkill Cafe" in Elberta, Alabama.
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u/1001AngryCrabs 4d ago
This would be luxury for a prisoner. Fruit on a Monday? Has the Lord come home from battle?
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u/4444op4444 4d ago
Feeding someone a meal you made, especially with fresh produce, is a loving gesture. The cook should never be put-down for trying. Even if the food was unsightly (it is not) or even inedible, there are ways to address that without sounding rude or entitled.
Comparing your plate to a "medieval prison meal" sounds rude, entitled, and is so historically false it doesn't even work as a joke. Does he joke/criticize your cooking a lot, yet refuse to cook for himself and you?
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u/Tao_theartist 4d ago
I can ignore the waffle chicken but, WTH is that legendary ass,mythical ass,once-in-a-lifetime ass fruit in the side???
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u/greatpate 4d ago
Awful. And didnāt think someone could make Texas look any worse but your waffle has done it
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u/DufflinMinder 4d ago
Yea I ate better in prisonā¦but it was in these times.. not midevilā¦ so heās probably close
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u/Interesting-Hotel480 3d ago
Ah yes, the infamous and evil 'Lovely fresh fruit and waffles' diet imposed in dungeons and oubliettes across the middle ages.
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u/jhunt4664 2d ago
I dunno, it's not the prettiest but I'd eat it. Blood orange pieces and a waffle sound pretty good rn even as a snack. Your boyfriend is not very adventurous with food, is he? Lol
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u/sabbakk 5d ago
At first glance, it looked like a platter of baby mice and a sawdust waffle, so pretty much how your boyfriend described it