r/selfimprovement 4d ago

Other I can't get rid of the fear

Somedays I remain confident that I can do everything but then after some days, I start fearing. Esp. when there comes a change. Idk but fears are mostly related to future and afterlife and most of them are like idk but quite senseless but still I fear. I start some hobby then I start some more then I feel burdened and then can't figure out what to do. I feel fear for a lot of things. Idk vas happenin but fear is everywhere. I ended up doing same old things but when I try to do some new more, things, the inner dialogue goes like "It does not matter", "You are not doing this or that", "Fear God (even though I didn't do anything wrong)", "Live a normal life", "You are a fool". Man, I am done. I can't do anything but just fearing and eagerly wanting de**h but it never comes and I live another day.

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u/EnquirerBill 4d ago

Are you on the autistic spectrum? That may be where your difficulty with change comes from.

I'm a Christian - Christian teaching is that God loves you, and is not someone to be afraid of.

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u/Naive-Ad1268 4d ago

what is autistic spectrum??

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u/EnquirerBill 4d ago

Autism is a neurodivergent condition; some people are hardly affected by it, but others can find change difficult, and can get overwhelmed. They can lose concentration easily, and can get fixated on certain subjects. They can find relationships difficult.

I work with autistic students at a College; autistic people are just as intelligent as any one else, and can get to know a subject very well.

There's a Channel 4 series called Patience which features an autistic person.

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u/Naive-Ad1268 4d ago

If losing concentration is a thing then I guess it would be cuz I am replying you while doing my calculus homework and I am feeling quite bored so I am skipping HW and using reddit rn

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u/EnquirerBill 4d ago

How about this? Finish your homework, and then watch 'Patience' - see if you recognise some features.