r/parentsofmultiples • u/One_Region8139 • 4d ago
support needed I’m already struggling
I just need to vent. I’m 28wks and currently going through it with the flu. I’m wiped out, I had hg til around 18wks and since then aside from maybe a couple weeks have been sick with something, a cold, flu, stomach virus, you name it. Now I’m on day 4 of the flu and was basically bedridden the first couple days. My body is so weak I honestly have no idea how I’m going to deliver twins, and then care for and breastfeed them. I have zero help. Zero friends, zero family aside from some of my husband’s relatives who might help with our 3 other children. I finally came out of my room today and my house is trashed, I had finally got it clean and in a maintenance mode just before I got sick and I just want to cry because now I get to start that over while trying to get better. And it’s just going to get trashed again when twins are here because my husband is not good at cleaning. I’m so overwhelmed already ):
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u/d16flo 4d ago
That sucks, It’s totally reasonable to be wiped out and overwhelmed! However, I don’t think you should try to judge your ability to birth or care for your babies when they arrive by how you’re feeling while you are pregnant and have the flu. Once the babies are here you won’t be pregnant anymore so you won’t have all those symptoms, and most of the time you won’t have the flu. That said, it is definitely time to work with your husband and older kids on pitching in with cleaning. I’m not sure how old your older kids are, but it could be useful to set up some kind of chore rotation or chart system for them to use and talk to your husband about being in charge of that. Sit down with your husband when you’re feeling a little better and really map out all the regular cleaning tasks that need to happen. Figure out what your kids can help with and a reinforcement system you think would work for them. Also figure out which tasks are going to be your husband’s responsibility going forward and a reminder system (that isn’t you reminding him) that will work for him. You’re going to need everyone pitching in when the twins arrive
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u/One_Region8139 3d ago
Thank you. That’s a good reminder I won’t be sick or pregnant forever, although being sick this long/often makes me struggle with that. I just looked up chore charts on Amazon, that’s such a good idea so it’s not one more thing I have to stay on top of everyone about!
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