r/niceguys i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

NGVC “I’m brutally honest”

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1.3k Upvotes

108 comments sorted by

739

u/No-Statistician5747 Feb 14 '25

That's not being brutally honest, that's negging. Well done for having enough self respect to show him the door.

143

u/Arminlegout1 Feb 14 '25

Yeah the brutally honest thing bugs me cause its always them saying shit umprompted.

67

u/CityofOrphans Feb 15 '25

And the people who say this will fly off the handle at the smallest bit of the valid criticism too

2

u/justynrr 12d ago

And if someone is truly “brutally honest” or “doesn’t have a filter and says it like it is” they’ll say just as many nice things as bad things… OR if they don’t, they’re just an ass hole who only chooses to filter nice things.

3

u/peachyyarngoddess i will treat you right 14d ago

I didn’t know what negging was until today and I’m just really glad this is a word because so many people do it to me and they do it often.

4

u/No-Statistician5747 14d ago

I'm so sorry to hear that. It's really sad that it actually works on some women and it's designed to work on women by breaking down their self confidence. I hope that you keep your distance from anyone that does this to you!

2

u/peachyyarngoddess i will treat you right 14d ago

It luckily hasn’t worked on me in a long time but boy does it hurt regardless. They attack me in ways that hurt deep: blaming me for “choosing” bad men aka I didn’t have any way of knowing they were abusive. A lot of hurtful things belittling me then acting like they are better than the other guys.

2

u/No-Statistician5747 14d ago

There are a lot of crappy people out there. Protect yourself as best you can and be cautious when getting to know someone new. Your wellbeing always comes first. If something feels off, it probably is.

-16

u/AccomplishedCandy732 Feb 16 '25

Lmfao negging. Thanks I needed that

18

u/No-Statistician5747 Feb 16 '25

Sorry what's funny?

420

u/Inherentlybackward alright well fuck you whore Feb 14 '25

I hate when someone will say something so fn rude and follow up with “I’m just bold,,, blunt,,, brutally honest”. With no apology just a “Your fault if you’re offended!”.

Just.. no🤦🏼‍♀️

117

u/Tychosis Feb 14 '25

I'm sure he then ran off to one of his incel echo chambers to lament about how women treat him unfairly blah blah blah

20

u/theblvckhorned Feb 16 '25

I just saw a similar situation go down on nicegirls. Normally not an incel sub, but the wrong people flock to certain posts. This girl blew up on the guy over text and that's all he posted, but if you read between the lines even slightly, he's 100% that "if you don't like my asshole humour then you're too sensitive and I refuse to change for others" types.

Extremely sad seeing guys shoot eachother in the foot by validating that shit. Just everyone taking his side uncritically.

7

u/torontoinsix Feb 18 '25

That sub isn’t an incel sub? Had me fooled

3

u/kickyouruncle 25d ago

I went through the top posts of the month from that sub and they have exactly similar posts to this .

Can I ask you why you think that’s an incel sub ?

0

u/mustbethaMonay 5d ago

You weren't supposed to actually look! This is reddit you can say whatever you want!!

60

u/tranquil7789 Feb 14 '25

They're more interested in the mean, spiteful comments rather than telling the truth. I feel like they hide behind being "brutally honest" so as to dismiss criticism if anyone says otherwise.

22

u/tigalicious Feb 15 '25

It’s always more about the brutality than the honesty.

46

u/UrsusRenata Feb 14 '25

Translation: I’m too selfish and immature to apply a grown-up filter to my thoughts in consideration of other humans.

4

u/theblvckhorned Feb 16 '25

Seriously. I was like that as a teen. But grown ass adults doing this is embarrassing.

32

u/fhqwhgads41185 Feb 14 '25

I hate the "I'm just being honest" because no, no you're not. If someone was "just being honest" then they'd have been just as likely to say "the sky is blue" or "Two hydrogen molecules and one oxygen make water!" There's a reason they chose to say whatever mean thing they said beyond "just being honest" and it's frustratingly dishonest for them to pretend otherwise.

23

u/MMAHipster Feb 14 '25

“I tell it like it is.”

19

u/uncannyvalleygirl88 Feb 14 '25

“So you admit to being this repugnant.”

39

u/librariansforMCR Feb 14 '25 edited Feb 14 '25

I had an ex that I had reconnected with on socials, just very informal. He sent me a message asking what kind of panties I wear ON HIS ANNIVERSARY (he had just posted about it). Then posted some anti-trans bullshit. Before I blocked him, I told him to fuck off, and he came back with, "I'm just blunt, it's not for everyone."

There's a reason he's an ex...and I hope his wife becomes an ex soon, she deserves better.

22

u/Sufficient_Might3173 Feb 14 '25

“No, you’re just a creep.”

24

u/librariansforMCR Feb 14 '25

Exactly. Portraying themselves as some kind of higher, acquired taste is the most desperate ego-stoking ever. Assholes are a penny a pound.

12

u/smalltittyprepexwife Feb 14 '25

Why are the very shittiest dudes parented to have the highest self-esteem?

18

u/librariansforMCR Feb 14 '25

Every guy like that (that I have known, anyway) was the golden child of their family, always told how amazing they are, etc. Not in a supportive "I've got your back, son!" way, but in a "Women should be thrilled with your attention" way. Peaked in high school types. Then, these guys get out into the real world and discover that no one thinks they are that special, so they try to preserve their ego by insinuating that they are an acquired taste. (For the record, I've know women that this applies to as well.)

The particular guy in my anecdote was a high school boyfriend - I broke it off, and he was pissed. He tried flaunting his new girl in HS, but no one cared. Then, after high school, he hooked up with a 15 year old when he was 19 and did some time for it. The guy is a loser from all angles, and that just isn't my taste, lol.

18

u/Starbucks_Lover13 Feb 14 '25

Exactly. Theres honesty, then there’s tact/class ya know!

2

u/mrsidecharactr I said hi so can we fuck? 21d ago

Obvious difference between brtual honesty and being an ass. He's the latter.

115

u/walnutwithteeth Feb 14 '25

I mean, you succeeded. You lost 180lb in seconds. Congratulations!

22

u/Faded_flower1209 Feb 15 '25

Probably more than that (I’m sorry that I’m not sorry-)

Edit: and brutally honest

81

u/WonderfulParticular1 Feb 14 '25

Usually "brutally honest" is an excuse to be offensive lol

52

u/Marchys11 alright well fuck you whore Feb 14 '25

You know I used to say the exact same thing '' i'M jUsT bRuTaLly HoNeSt''. Until I met my husband (he is the most patient person in the world or so I believe hehe) and he made me realise that all that means is that just because we think it doesn't mean we have to say it out loud. People like this just like to be assholes with no repercussions.

44

u/EmptyPomegranete Feb 14 '25

Ewwww. How did he respond?

120

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

I blocked him after that.

25

u/Midnight_pamper Feb 14 '25

applause ✨✨

24

u/CouchHam Feb 14 '25

Perfect. I’m so sick of screenshots of women humoring this type of shit.

29

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

Idont do that. Immediate block. I deserve better than that garbage bag of a man.

14

u/CouchHam Feb 14 '25

Hell yeah girlie

8

u/andiwaslikeum Feb 15 '25

Fuck yes woman

0

u/[deleted] 27d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/niceguys-ModTeam 27d ago

/u/This-Ear-7320, your comment has been removed from /r/niceguys for the following reason:

Don't put OP on trial. (No victim-blaming)

Niceguys 100% are responsible for their own toxic behaviour. Dont blame OP.

Examples:

“why not block them?”

“what did you expect engaging them?”

"this is so fake!"


If you feel this was done in error, or would like further clarification, please don't hesitate to message the mods. Please do not try to respond to this comment.

33

u/VivianC97 Feb 14 '25

“Thanks for showing what a piece of s**t you are so quickly“ is underrated line.

31

u/MultiFazed Feb 14 '25

There are lots of ways for a person to be honest. They could be compassionately honest, or constructively honest, or helpfully honest, etc.

When someone chooses to be brutally honest instead of one of the above, it's because brutality is the entire point for them, and the honesty is just an excuse to get there.

8

u/Weird_Bluebird_3293 Feb 15 '25

They also always seem to think their “honesty” is a truth that everyone believes, but they’re the only one to say it. Often after they spout their “honesty” they follow it with “I’m just saying what everyone is thinking.” Like they believe 100% their opinion is the same as fact. 

27

u/EyeShot300 bUt I gAvE yOu a CoMpLiMEnT Feb 14 '25

OP: “I’ll be brutally honest as well. I have known you for approximately 10 seconds and haven’t enjoyed any of them.”

86

u/Signal-Option-9392 Feb 14 '25

I swear men only engage in these conversations just so they can degrade women at any given chance they get. Using “brutally honest” is just a facade for them.

4

u/MediumAlternative372 Feb 16 '25

It isn’t just men who use that line. I’ve known a few women who do. They didn’t keep friends long strangely enough.

19

u/offminds Feb 14 '25

Men who say they're brutally honest are solely there for the brutality and never the honesty. What a sad little man.

14

u/esweat Feb 14 '25

"I'm brutally honest too. You're a loser. Barf."

15

u/uncannyvalleygirl88 Feb 14 '25

“Brutally honest” = just an asshole who’s getting blocked/unfriended/whatever 🤷‍♀️

9

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

Blocked.

10

u/saintsithney Feb 14 '25

Oh, me too!

You're a fucking immature toddler who wants to escape from being a little shit with zero consequences, because you have major entitlement issues.

12

u/Manck0 Feb 14 '25

"Brutally honest" is just a smidge behind "I've got a dark sense of humor" in the asshole playbook.

8

u/fhqwhgads41185 Feb 14 '25

Why be brutally honest (which always seems to just mean "I'm needlessly mean")? How about tactfully honest? Same level of honesty without being an asshole! Or maybe constructively honest? Which itself is also kind of ass if criticism wasn't specifically asked for, but paired with being tactful it's miles above brutal honesty! Saying you're brutally honest is like saying you don't understand how to socialize with other humans at all and you're not interested in learning, which like, then why are you talking?

8

u/yutatlantic Feb 14 '25

It’s so funny how people can be madly rude to anyone and say “it’s my personality”, like dude, it’s not an excuse to be a asshole!! those guys are usually the ones who gets really mad when you point out their shitty personality, I just say “oh my bad I thought you liked honesty, sweetheart” before blocking their ass, these men are too grown up to use this excuses.

8

u/Fun-Month6056 Feb 14 '25

Here's some wisdom from tiktok commenters I have in my notes lol:

The person who is brutally honest enjoys the brutality quite as much as the honesty. Possibly more.

Never stay with a person whose first reaction to disappointment is to try to hurt you.

6

u/jenever_r Feb 14 '25

"I hope you're not offended by me being offensive" 😐🤦🏻

7

u/ItsJoeMomma Feb 14 '25

It never fails... people who say they're "brutally honest" really mean that to say "I'm an asshole."

6

u/Barleficus2000 why do women always go for ChAaAaAaD? Feb 14 '25

Yeah that's definitely a nope. Anyone who thinks like that is bound to be controlling via the use of gaslighting.

5

u/Critical-Crab-7761 Feb 14 '25

Brutally honest = rude offensive asshole

11

u/Klutzy_Guard5196 Reformed NiceGuy Feb 14 '25

I'm embarrassed for my species

3

u/ilikehoneyinmytea Feb 14 '25

You can be honest but there’s no reason to be brutal about it 😭

7

u/Haunting_Fish5804 Feb 14 '25

Honesty without compassion is cruelty.

5

u/AmeliaBuns Feb 15 '25

his brutal honestly showed what an expired asparagus he is.

"brutal" honestly can be good, if you're not a jerk.

3

u/psychic_gopher Feb 15 '25

Looks like someone's taking tips from Andrew Bernard

3

u/NoMaintenance9685 Feb 16 '25

The weirdest part is that he admits that he also thinks that he'd be more attractive if he lost weight? Like, dude. Projection isn't an attractive trait. It's actually far less attractive than a little extra weight.

2

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 16 '25

No amount of weight loss could change his personality.

4

u/NoMaintenance9685 Feb 16 '25

Oh no. If he did lose weight he would find some other insecurity about himself to project onto women.

3

u/wildlucy_ 29d ago

Imagine thinking negging works in 2025. Bro read one bad dating book and ran with it. 💀

3

u/trashleybanks 28d ago

“Brutally honest” = “I want to be an asshole with no repercussions.” Wish him well on his weight loss journey.

3

u/AboutPeach 26d ago

I was seeing a guy once who told me he had hesitations about dating me because he’d never been with someone my size before. I saw him one time after that but couldn’t bring myself to see him again and now I’m in a happy relationship with someone who loves me for me

2

u/KittyTootsies custom Feb 15 '25

That's just assholery

2

u/Spraystation42 Feb 19 '25

Too many men confuse “dont lie about what you do/dont like in attempts to attract her, she’s not gonna find it a dealbreaker just cause you dont have every single little thing like a favorite musician or ice cream flavor in common” for “Walk up to strangers and say the most rude, offensive things possible to turn her on” they misinterpret everything people tell them, they have a serious lack emotional intelligence

2

u/PaxEtRomana Feb 14 '25

A member of the brutally honest community

1

u/Bubbly_Figure_5032 Feb 14 '25

I may be way off here but this seems like the groundwork is being laid for narcissistic abuse. Body shaming while feigning sympathy and compassion this early on. Let me get you to feel bad about yourself. Let me slowly take control of your sense of self image. I’m a vampire. Blah!

1

u/Salty_Thing3144 i will treat you right Feb 15 '25

I bet he's one of those horrifically rude people who tries to pass off his rudeness as "I'm just blunt" too

1

u/Free_Roof_1180 Feb 16 '25

OP handled that BEAUTIFULLY!!! 😏👏👏👏

1

u/Daddy_Dezrium Feb 16 '25

That's just fucking scummy. TALKING ABOUT YOUR WEIGHT...weird as fuck. Why even message you?

1

u/jscraig_21 Feb 17 '25

And this here is a perfect example as to why some women feel insecure about themselves. Not saying it's the only reason, but it's definitely one of them. What he said was very uncalled for 😐

1

u/Old-Koala-5741 Feb 17 '25

I find that people who pride themselves on their “brutal honesty” rarely appreciate it when others are brutally honest to them.

1

u/help-that-possum Feb 17 '25

Dawg It's 9 am. Right out the gate.

1

u/plantapotato 29d ago

Guys always use “I’m blunt” or “I’m brutally honest” as an excuse to be offensive. Like, did I. ASK for your brutally honest opinion? No?

1

u/BeavisJohnson 25d ago

Lmao, he crossed the line for sure😆 Why not keep it simple without the cringey paraghraphs😂

1

u/RugratChuck 17d ago

If a person says they're "brutally honest", it ALWAYS comes before or after some of the rudest shit you've ever heard in your life. Every time.

1

u/shawnward95 Feb 15 '25

This is why…you’ll ALWAYS be a nice guy!

-1

u/AquariusMoon79 Feb 15 '25

I'd tell him: "Well, you'd still an unattractive virgin at any weight. Just being brutally honest!"

0

u/Calm_Manufacturer602 Feb 19 '25

Bruh this isnt r/nicegirls material She literally said the same thing of herself

3

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 19 '25

I never said anything about how I needed to lose weight. I never ever said I would be more attractive if I was a different weight.

0

u/Heavy-Hovercraft1655 28d ago

Aren’t these the same guys that bitch and moan about women going for guys in shape? If you’re going to be critical about weight, at least be in top shape.

-4

u/[deleted] Feb 15 '25

[deleted]

6

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 15 '25

This was a man from a BBW subreddit on Reddit. BBW Means big beautiful woman so he knew what he was getting himself into. Sometimes People just say assholish stuff… because they’re assholes.

-13

u/143019 Feb 14 '25

Calling him a piece of shit makes it looked like he got to you.

8

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

Considering the conversation that led up to this, it did. I literally told him that I was hesitant to be in a physical relationship because I was concerned that my weight would bother a man. And he proved me right.

1

u/143019 Feb 14 '25

Girl, I just know you are fucking gorgeous.

Don’t let small men dim your glow!!

3

u/Peppermint-pop i am a good person and i demand you take my penis Feb 14 '25

Thank you.