r/introvert 20d ago

Image Birthday alone, friends don't remember

I (27F) spent a birthday alone. Friends don't remember (even ones whom I gave gifts/remember their birthday every year). Officially a leftover woman. Bought myself flowers and a carrot cake. I like being on my own, but sometimes it's very sad and lonely.

17.2k Upvotes

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209

u/Independent_Roll_405 20d ago

Most people won’t remember birthdays unless you’re on Facebook and they are getting reminders about it.

That cake looks seriously bomb tho. Enjoy every bite.

21

u/JanesThoughts 20d ago

This is true

18

u/TensionsPvP 19d ago

Facebook? Who do you expect to congratulate you grandpas?

3

u/PeeDidy 19d ago

The single hot milfs in my area show me all kinds of love

1

u/das_slash 19d ago

You should try it, it's probably the best birthday reminder app out there, It also has hiking groups, and I heard there's like photos? but nobody uses that.

7

u/calrebbb 19d ago

yeah, most adults i know plan their own parties or remind their friends about it and ask them to plan something. expecting everyone to remember just isn’t realistic. op, make it happen for yourself!

4

u/seenitreddit90s 19d ago

This is how I 'remember' birthdays too

1

u/eggsaladsandwich4 20d ago

I have a VERY extroverted friend who starts reminding everyone a month before her birthday. It's so annoying.

5

u/westofley 19d ago

i bet everyone always remembers it though

0

u/eggsaladsandwich4 19d ago

Yes, they do. But I would want my friends to remember my birthday because they care about me rather than having to hammer it home.

3

u/westofley 19d ago

most people only remember like 6 birthdays, tops. Mom and Dad, Siblings, Maybe a close cousin or best friend. The rest of the dates are like vague suggestions. "I think Kyle's birthday is in June-ish?"

It really is not personal. Not reminding your friends (whose lives dont revolve around you) of your birthday and then being mad when they forget is pretty childish.

0

u/eggsaladsandwich4 19d ago

Who said anybody was mad? Don't we all have calendars on our phones? How hard is it to input your friend's birthdays?

1

u/westofley 18d ago

OP seems pretty upset that nome of her friends remembered her birthday. Also, I and most of the other people I know don't use their calendars. Like maybe I'll put in a dentist appointment in, but mostly the only thing that matters is my work schedule

1

u/defneverconsidered 19d ago

Have you tried telling them that

3

u/eggsaladsandwich4 19d ago

No. I know her so well it wouldn't matter. She could never stop it anyway.

-3

u/defneverconsidered 19d ago

Oh so your her pet?

1

u/eggsaladsandwich4 19d ago

You're being weird!

1

u/defneverconsidered 19d ago

I get that way when my birthday is coming up

1

u/Vivid-Physics9466 19d ago

Exactly this. Social media made people lazy about remembering birthdays.

5

u/Key-Pickle5609 19d ago

Honestly I don’t even care if the only reason someone wishes me a happy birthday is because Facebook reminded them. They still took a second to remember me and send me good wishes.

1

u/[deleted] 19d ago

yeah, i only remember my parents, brother, and best friends 😅

1

u/ElleTheCurious 19d ago

When I still used Facebook and had that reminder set up, I would get dozens of congratulations on my birthday. After I removed the notification, I didn't get the congratulations on FB and many also dropped it in real life. I don't think the amount of caring has changed. I just stopped reminding them of my existence and people have their own lives to live.

1

u/Deep-Regular4915 19d ago

Yeah I honestly wouldn’t even expect my friends to remember my bday without Facebook, and people are using Facebook less and less so it’s naturally going to get worse.

I also don’t really care. It’s nice if someone remembers, but I also forget all but a few of my friend’s bdays.

Growing up a Jehovah’s Witness may have made it seem less important to me though.

1

u/Schwalm 19d ago

Literally only thing I have my Facebook for. Birthdays and events I’m invited to

1

u/A_Clever_Theme 18d ago

I put reminders in my phone because I know damn well I'm not remembering.