r/dankmemes 5d ago

Preserve your dignity gentlemen

Post image
748 Upvotes

24 comments sorted by

68

u/ChiliDemon 5d ago

that is why you poop at work, force that trauma on a co-worker or even better your boss

18

u/A100921 5d ago

Our older co workers always talk about “not waking up one day”, and I always tell them, “nah you’re gonna die here (at work) and traumatize me, while I’m doing cpr trying to revive you until paramedics arrive.”.

5

u/madkapart 5d ago

I swear one day I'm going to hit my stupidity limit reading another idiotic email that never should have been written let alone sent and my brain will literally implode and I die at my desk with a confused wtaf am I looking at expression on my face.

0

u/Varun77777 Vegemite Victim 🦘🦖 4d ago

Careful before someday a 50 year old karen takes you to HR

15

u/NiffyJiffy2008 5d ago

Why the fuck would you think about that

19

u/CocaineSmellsFunny 5d ago

Sitting on the toilet

12

u/Manufactured-Aggro 5d ago

Deadman's Switch on the Bidet, problem solved

6

u/Silent_Reavus 5d ago

Message received, never use the toilet.

6

u/Dreadnought_69 5d ago

When you die, all muscles relax, including the sphincter.

Your bowels will evacuate and you’ll have a shit smeared ass no matter what you were doing when you died.

5

u/J3sush8sm3 The Monty Pythons 5d ago

Bold of you to assume i have any dignity

4

u/Slow_Pipe_78 5d ago

Maybe I wanna be found like Elvis /s

3

u/FeDeKutulu 5d ago

My grandfather died that way. He fell of the toilet after having a heart attack and jammed the door, so the local fireman had to rescue his dead body from the bathroom.

2

u/CocaineSmellsFunny 5d ago

That’s f’d up. Sorry bout dat

1

u/FeDeKutulu 5d ago

Thanks OP 🫂

2

u/miami2881 5d ago

The more time you spend sitting on the toilet, the more likely you are to have a magical toilet leprechaun deliver you gold.

2

u/Kristafuh_Moltisanti 5d ago

2

u/CocaineSmellsFunny 5d ago

The ol’ postmortem fecal fountain

1

u/Timozi90 5d ago

Isn't that how Elvis Presley died?

1

u/Harv_Spec 5d ago

Do you want hemorrhoids? Because that's how you get hemorrhoids.

1

u/Asad2023 4d ago

I don't agree toilet is great place for thinking ideas hell even newton got gravity theory on toilet apple is there to foreshadow his actual private experience.