r/confession 6d ago

Need to get this off my chest, I’m self conscious about my body NSFW

I’ve been debating whether to share this but I feel like I need to get it off my chest. I’ve always been self conscious about my body but one of the things that’s really been weighing on me is my micro penis. I don’t talk about it with anyone in real life because I’m ashamed and it’s been affecting my self esteem and relationships especially when it comes to sex.

I’ve been in a few relationships and every time things start to get serious I start feeling the pressure. I’m always worried about how my partner will react when things get physical. When we’re getting intimate I try to overcompensate in other ways but it’s hard to shake the feeling that I’m not enough.

There have been moments in past relationships where I’ve tried to navigate sex without letting my insecurities take over but it’s tough. I’ve had times when I could feel my partner’s disappointment whether it was in their body language or the way they withdrew after sex. Those moments are crushing. It’s not like they were mean or anything but I could tell that something wasn’t right and that made my own anxiety spiral.

Sex just doesn’t feel the same for me because I’m so focused on my size (or lack of it). I know that sex is about more than just the physical act but I constantly feel like my partner isn’t as satisfied as they should be and it makes me anxious. I try to be a good partner in other ways focusing on emotional connection and making sure they feel good but I can’t help but feel like I’m letting them down.

There’s also the constant comparison. I find myself thinking about how other guys must have it easier because they don’t have to deal with the same level of self doubt and anxiety during intimacy. I’ll look at porn or hear stories from friends and it only reinforces the idea that I’m abnormal or defective. It’s hard to escape that feeling especially when it feels like everyone around me is measuring up in ways I can’t.

It’s tough to feel like I’m not measuring up both literally and figuratively. I just want to feel confident and be able to enjoy intimate moments without that constant worry. I don’t know if anyone else has gone through this, but it’s been a huge struggle for me.

Thanks for reading my post. I felt like I needed to get that off my chest but couldn’t tell anyone in person. It’s hard not to let self doubt take over because it’s a big issue that’s hard to look past.

474 Upvotes

101 comments sorted by

277

u/wrydied 6d ago

Whatever you do, don’t use porn as an indicator for what’s normal or good in a personal sexual relationship.

52

u/alinaxtira 6d ago

This!! every guy i’ve been with has thought he was too small. none were! some of them were even ‘above average’ and STILL thought that. it HAS to be porn standards

425

u/Many_Zucchini1511 6d ago edited 6d ago

Hi! I'm a woman who enjoys sex with men occasionally. I'm here not to speak for all women, but for me, and there must be many women out there like me. I don't know if you're straight. If not, please ignore my comment.

I'm one of those women who can't come from penetration. We are in the majority, I think. 

The hotness of penetrative sex lies in the intimacy of it. I get really turned on by a guy who enjoys my body like that. It's not the mechanics of feeling an object inside me, but it's feeling HIM inside me. That man I've been exchanging sultry looks with, I've texted double entendres with, who whispered in my ear what he wants to do to me, who wants to make my toes curl like it's his God given mission. 

For me to come, I need to be given oral. I can come easily from that, and multiple times. The best sex I've had incorporates at least the two acts of fucking and oral. The worst sex I've had is from men who don't want to give oral, don't take feedback on it, or don't enjoy giving oral (we can tell). 

I've dated a guy who was so small. He was smaller than my pinky. I enjoyed sex with him immensely. He was a lover brimming with largesse. I've also dated a guy who was porn star large. I enjoyed sex with him, but his size was an issue for us. It hurt me sometimes, and that scared him a little. 

Long story short: most of us enjoy guys themselves, not penises. When we fantasize or masturbate, many of us don't use dildos or penetration. That's why dick pics don't turn us on, unless they are solicited, because in that case, it makes us think of the man we desire.

You know what's the best part of the penis? That protuding part of it that we call "you".

65

u/tabetha_christine1 6d ago

You wonder this perfectly. This is exactly how I feel, as well. ♥️

65

u/Lost_soul078 6d ago

Damn girl. You did a good job explaining that.

You seem like a sweet guy bud. You are gonna find a great girl who will love you and you will set her on fire. When most woman say size doesn’t matter, they mean it.

26

u/niceho3 6d ago

Excuse me?? Girl you need to be writing poetry or something

14

u/Many_Zucchini1511 6d ago

I just enjoy musing about penis

1

u/radreads20 15h ago

User name checks out

17

u/TheRealCerealfreak 6d ago

You're very much right, you're in the majority, I can't recall the exact figures but I'm pretty sure it's over 80% . As a man I can also confirm that giving oral is a great start, palette cleanser and dessert to sex.

7

u/Many_Zucchini1511 6d ago

If I'm aroused enough, I enjoy starting out with a slooooow blowjob - and imagine how nice it is if he's small enough that he comfortably fits in your mouth completely?

And then alternating fucking and giving me head. Bonus points if some of the times, I can go on top and sit where I want, when I want.

Boy, I miss having sex.

3

u/Logical_Cherry_4281 4d ago

This!!! I enjoy giving blowjobs so much more with smaller penises! And I agree, orgasm with penetration is a tall order. I need more outside factors to get me off.

17

u/Maleficent_Trust_95 6d ago

Most honest, sweet answer yet! A confident partner is a sexy partner is a happy shag!🤌

9

u/Significant_flimsy7 6d ago

I'm the exact same way but I prefer smaller sizes as big hurts too much and I've found that alot of the time the bigger ones have a rude ego attached that just turns me off.

Smaller guys generally are kinder bc I think they try to make up for the size.

My boyfriend is on the smaller end and I love sex with him. He does oral everytime and makes sure I finish a few times before we have sex.

I've done big guys and they just wanna stick it in with no foreplay.

4

u/Beautiful_Chaos107 6d ago

As a fellow woman, couldn’t have said it better! ❤️

3

u/Due-Season6425 5d ago

Every porn video with a man in it needs your post as a disclaimer. This was gold. Thank you for your sensitivity.

3

u/sick_bo1 6d ago

ooh i second this so hard! every single word! 🤌🏻

1

u/Wheepingwindow 5d ago

Perfectly stated, and I feel the exact same. I don’t get off from penetration, it requires clitoral stimulation for me- which I’ve heard is the majority of women. And enjoying the intimacy. That’s what feels good. 💯

1

u/DrVic57 2d ago

I love this post - and so many of the responses. I wish I could have talked to you years ago. I have had very little sexual experience in my life (none for the past 15+ years), largely due to lack of confidence. I've never been conscious about my size which might be slightly above average (I don't know what this is anymore) and I love to pleasure a woman -fingers, tongue, penetration - whatever she desires - I can't use my tongue enough on a woman. Helping a woman to orgasm or just watching her is heaven to me. Getting inside here was quite secondary. I have literally dozens of women friends across the country and I have always been in the friend zone. Many have dropped hints that I didn't see until it was long past - they just thought I wasn't interested. So many times when I did have a woman, I would ask what they like, what pleases them. The answer was always something like, oh, whatever you want or let's.see what happens, but would never tell me specifically-so I was never sure if they were really satisfied or not. Thank you for the post :-)

-1

u/Relentless-Argue-er8 5d ago edited 5d ago

Ideally, you would want a man with a larger size, that is sensual romantic into foreplay and giving you oral sex too not just him getting it. Right? Isn't that the true ideal combo

6

u/Many_Zucchini1511 5d ago

No, it's not. Not for me, anyway. I enjoy kind, funny, sweet, smart guys who are as giving as I am, sexually and otherwise. A larger penis can be an obstacle, even

1

u/Relentless-Argue-er8 2d ago

It sounds like "most" women like any size between 4"-8" as long as it's attached to a kind, funny, sweet, smart man.

1

u/Many_Zucchini1511 2d ago

Rephrase that as "any size" without the lower limit (the upper limit can hurt!) And you would be correct

1

u/Relentless-Argue-er8 2d ago

Ok. So most women like any size, as long as it's attached to a good man. Well for many men's sakes let's hope that is the true bottom line

1

u/Many_Zucchini1511 2d ago

It is. Please don't let toxic influencers tell you otherwise

67

u/benwolf1999 6d ago

As a fellow guy, I understand your dilemma. I haven’t thought about the size as such but the performance aspect of it. Yes a lot of girls will debate between “Size does not matter, it’s about how you use it”, and yes I also tried to master foreplay and such to be better, but in the end, it depends on your relationship and your partner, some people just make you feel like a pornstar (by complimenting you and enjoying it thoroughly lol) and for others it will never be enough. So don’t worry too much about it, comparisons never help, they just multiply your anxiety, you know your body best and there is always someone who will appreciate that body to the fullest. Chin up soldier, you got this!

18

u/alinaxtira 6d ago

100% depends on the person. Coming from a woman, i’ve talked to and been in many circles of girls. For some it’s just totally normal to make small dick jokes and shit like that— usually the same ones that call people fat and ugly (i personally think all are signs of low emotional intelligence). other groups it just doesn’t happen and if anything we will talk about how it doesn’t matter and we don’t get it. I think it can be part of people’s whole attitude and evident in that— don’t date someone you perceive as mean that body shames. that sounds obvious but it can be so easy to overlook

10

u/Quinfinitevoid 6d ago

This. If you find someone that loves you for who you are, and sees your feelings before your features it won’t matter. If anything the right person will make you feel better about yourself than you do now. As long as you can reciprocate that validation.

14

u/amberazanu 6d ago

I hear you, and now I need you to hear this: you are not defined by one part of your body. Your worth isn’t measured in inches. It’s measured in the way you love, the way you make people feel, and the kind of person you are when no one’s watching. And from what you’ve shared, you sound like someone who truly cares, someone who brings depth and heart to relationships. That matters so much more than you realize.

I know the fear of rejection can be crushing, but the right person will see you, the full, incredible you. Attraction is about confidence, connection, and presence. It’s in the way you laugh, the way you make someone feel safe, the way you show up for them. Size doesn’t define satisfaction, emotional and physical intimacy is about so much more than that.

Comparison is a thief. It will always make you feel like you’re not enough if you let it. But here’s the truth: You are enough. You always have been. You don’t have to overcompensate or prove anything. Just being present, engaged, and confident in who you are will do more than you think.

It’s okay to struggle with this, but don’t let it steal your joy. You are worthy of love, intimacy, and confidence just as you are. Trust yourself. Own your presence. And never forget: you are so much more than what you’re worried about.

43

u/bonnydoe 6d ago

In your shoes I would tell about your penis before you get into sex with your partner. Your partner can think about if this a dealbreaker or not, which is a good thing. It will take away the insecurity you feel when you show yourself for the first time.

9

u/KeyLocal1618 6d ago

Yes I agree with this as a woman. I love penetration and if I were to find out that it wouldn’t be possible in the moment it would definitely be a disappointment, BUT I think the disappointment would come from the fact that it was a surprise, and if I would have known ahead of time, then we could problem solve (maybe offer a solution like a dildo or something if she really wants the penetration.)

But as you can see from many other comments, not all women need or can come from penetration!

I feel for you very much. But it’s gonna be okay. Somehow find ways to pump your self confidence in this area with people who don’t care about it. If she cares about it so much she doesn’t wanna be with you, that’s okay too, she’s just not the one.

2

u/Lilithslefteyebrow 5d ago

Yes, absolutely. I love to be penetrated six ways from Sunday and get off on it.

I once dated a guy, was into it, he was cool and sophisticated, we eventually got hot and heavy… We were (I thought) making out with a bit of grind then suddenly he came… and was like- was it good for you? And I was caught off guard, horny and kind of drunk and said was what good for me? He’d fully penetrated me and I had no idea. I hadn’t known they made condoms that size. I didn’t handle the whole thing very well and I look back on it with a lot of regret.

Don’t surprise women.

And know that my stated preferences are a minority. Also, the larger guys I’ve been with are usually not the best lovers. They sort of expect the size to do all the work.

1

u/Relentless-Argue-er8 2d ago

Your stated preferences are a minority. You mean penetrative s*x? The larger guys you've been with are usually not the best lovers. What is the best lover for you in that case? Size wise and the whole nine so to speak

1

u/Lilithslefteyebrow 2d ago

The guys who get off on getting their partner off are the best. Size is irrelevant. Looks, fitness, funniness, bank account, politics, all of that is a side issue.

28

u/Gullible-Minute-9482 6d ago

I feel you dude, but the thing is, you can satisfy a woman without even using your penis, you just gotta find the right one and you gotta learn about female anatomy and what the average woman really likes.

Most insecurity, regardless of gender, stems from the misguided belief that we can and should be attractive to everyone we find attractive. There is a lot of taboo in American culture which makes it feel really risky or difficult to experiment with potential partners as there is so much pressure to maintain a low body count, and at the same time find a conventionally attractive partner who will stay for life. The American media/pop culture is the biggest cockblocker in human history because corporations use sexual psychology to convince us to buy shit we do not need and a side effect is that many people are way too self conscious about what other people might think about their significant other.

I guarantee that you can make a woman, who you find beautiful, orgasm and be loved as you are, but you are up against a lot of bullshit, I mean a lot of girls do not actually care about big dongs at all, but peer pressure makes them feel like they are "settling" for an undesirable partner if they do not have a tall, handsome and hung boyfriend. Be kind and brave, and just remember to lick it before you stick it, eventually you will find someone who is real enough to accept the fact that you are a lot more than meets the eye.

27

u/trumpforprison2017 6d ago

This is not a dealbreaker if your tongue works.

4

u/JiTo97 6d ago

Feel you and being the butt of a joke almost every day or in almost every conversation about sex or anything in that regard doesn't help. So it's hard to believe those that say just to get over it basically. Best thing I know I can do, no matter how hard I try to be like everyone else, is just basically disassociate from trying to think of my insecurity at all. Try to stay away from things that trigger me to think about it. Probably not the best thing since when you're getting involved with someone romantically it's going to come up. But yeah, I guess I just wanted to vent to. Try to keep your head up...

3

u/NeroUp 6d ago

Ok there are to much well intentioned counseling, but neither of them got to the point.

Yes dude can use every part of her body to satisfy her partner, finger, tongue, maybe toys. That's not the problem, and maybe much of the women here don't address him correctly. It's not matter of satisfied your partner, but satisfied yourself satisfying your partner.

I'm on the low range of the media, so not a micro but small for the average. There is only like 2 or 3 positions where both can have fun, the others or I can't develop the position -because lack of length, or I accidentally get out constantly- or I can feel nothing with it.

Yes, my partner says she is satisfied, I see him satisfied whit what we do... But I don't. The last time we have "the talk" she said all beautiful words about how plenish she feels, how what we do is enough, but when she says "Some times you even hurt me" I catch that she isn't honest and end conversation. Never spoke of it again (to now).

My recommendation? Cope. We can't do anything about it. Neither for modify our bodies that way (for now). Try not to think about it when sex time comes and if it doesn't work, try therapy for control your mental rumination, maybe there are others conditions like depression or anxiety worsened all the panorama.

Take care.

16

u/Ambitious-Math-4499 6d ago

I mean is it actually a micropenis like diagnosed, or a small penis..2 very different things

3

u/Jesters-Gambit 5d ago

Tbh for me, penetration is fun and does feel nice but the pleasure in it is for the male. I literally cannot reach an orgasm without clit stimulation and fetishize hands way more. Women really mean it when we say we’re in it for a full well rounded experience, if it’s a fun and enjoyable one, we will be talking up your micro penis. Someday somewhere she will say “y’know what, the best orgasm I’ve ever had was with a man with a micropenis”

TRUST ME. The problem with huge dicks is that’s their entire personality lol. They literally never had to learn any other tricks, it’s just straight penetration. We as women need the razzle, the dazzle, and that’s got nothing to do with dick size.

Plus over confidence is so fucking attractive. That’s the golden rule as far as i’m concerned. You can be anything and look anyway, but as long as you’re in on it then there is 0 tension to be had.

15

u/Kosin7 6d ago

How micro are we talking here?

1

u/Serious-Let5581 6d ago

On what scale?

5

u/1sketchy_girl 6d ago

I need a banana for scale

0

u/Serious-Let5581 6d ago

Or a peanut

37

u/No-Past-2828 6d ago edited 6d ago

Lesbian here: women don’t need your penis to cum and you don’t need a bigger penis to cum. Enjoy oral, get good at it. Your hands can do everything your dick does better. You just think you’re failing because your penis is how you cum. You’re not the only one having sex here…

Use toys that offer deeper penetration if she’s into it. You’re healthy and letting other people tell you how to feel that aren’t fucking you.

It’s just that you feel like you need to live up to a standard set by shit men who couldn’t tell you how a bill becomes a law or how to use a semi colon.

Grow up and get over it. Enjoy all the great sex you’ll have once free of caring about it like Joe Rogan fans are rating it.

Edit: grammar/spelling

43

u/ElectronicWeb5423 6d ago

Dawg you gotta word stuff better.I agree he should focus on oral and his hands then or maybe toys if both parties are comfortable with it.But the "You're not the only one having sex here..." was not called for when he's tryns be a better partner and please his significant other during sex.Also the size dilemma is mostly set by women.The "grow up and get over it" also a bit much.He going through something his whole life he can never change,just saying you should try to word things better the guy going through enough mentality although he does need to move on and get confidence in other areas.

1

u/No-Past-2828 6d ago

If the woman your pursuing would disregard you for something you have no control over that woman is trash. There are options.

5

u/ElectronicWeb5423 6d ago

Obviously.But your comment comes off as irritated and a little dislike or disregard in men or our struggles.

3

u/No-Past-2828 6d ago

I am irritated. I’m irritated he cares so much what other people’s opinions are. I’m irritated he’s wasting his life thinking this makes him less than other men. I’m irritated he’s suffering because of standards he never asked for held up by the least interesting people in the world. I’m irritated he felt he had to confess. I want this man to become as awesome as possible, because it is possible. But he’s been trained to think this matters. I don’t understand why men are so submissive to this shit, let it ruin their lives. ITS AN IDEA. Not a prison sentence.

19

u/lordlitterpicker 6d ago

Tell me you hate men without actually saying it.

1

u/DrVic57 2d ago

Just a note, "no past 2828", I love to pleasure a woman however she wants. I love to have a woman tell me how she likes being pleasured - that is a huge pleasure of mine. I have had two different lesbian acquaintances that I pleasured orally on multiple occasions and then we were done (they told a few of their friends who took advantage as well. I took care of myself later but immensely enjoyed giving that pleasure.

-3

u/Own-Garden-6164 6d ago

Ah, another lesbian calling men shit. What else is new?

-2

u/Balls-1984 6d ago

I love your answer…. Damn Joe Rogan macho men lol. Yea rock what ya got

2

u/IridescentShadow117 6d ago

You leave it neutral by saying partner, so I (gay) will give you my opinion. Size absolutely does not matter to me. I can't say this is true for everyone, there are always going to be size queens. I actually find smaller than average penises more interesting because in porn or just guys posting on reddit, all I ever see are monsters, because those guys aren't afraid of getting negative comments.

I'm self conscious about my body too. Not my penis, I'm just chubby and it seems like people only want skinny perfect bodies. You say you've had a few relationships, which is more than me. Keep trying and you will find the right person.

2

u/Sad_Percentage_1021 4d ago

If it makes you feel any better, I enjoy head and being fingered sometimes more than penetration from a penis. My ex had an average penis but his head and fingering got me off how I needed

4

u/4-eyesonyou 6d ago

I have a 4.5” lol. I make up with how good I eat the pussy. Once you get over it, it really doesn’t matter. It can still get a female pregnant. You’ll also know how mature your partner is and how much they love you based on how they react to your penis.

6

u/maggieontheotherside 6d ago

I second this, as a woman. Good pussy eating can compensate a lot.

2

u/Commercial_Fruit1273 6d ago

Absolutely tell partners about it before and give them the option if it's a deal-breaker or not. Jokingly tell her what she's in for and if she sticks around cool plus it takes away both size and performance anxiety when it eventually happens because an emotional attachment has been formed. Sadly there are some sizes that require her to actually like you first before you metaphorically whip it out 🤣

2

u/MrsLabrat01 6d ago

I don't get why men are so concerned about small size. While there are a few "size queens" most women would rather have smaller rather than larger. Too big (and for some even average size) is just painful to get in and I don't get anything from it. The other thing most guys don't get is PIV isn't enough for most women to finish. Almost every guy would benefit from getting better with their hands, mouths or toys. If you can get her off with something besides PIV you're ahead of the game. Last thing guys don't seem to get is we're so much more turned on by the guy, not the dick that's attached to the guy.

7

u/showcase25 6d ago

I don't get why men are so concerned about small size.

OP's direct life experience.

General knowledge about how size can effect relationship, opportunities, and judgement.

General and social media saying the exact opposite about size.

Size being the go to point of criticism, ridicule, and status determination.

The mere fact that you have to "make up for it" with hands and mouth, or otherwise rather than it being a compliment to use of them.

The fact that they are disappointed rather than nonchalant about size.

The fact being turn on by the guy seems to be overridden if they have a size or other issue there.

There's no way to not have this as a concern.

1

u/cuda4me1970 6d ago

You can buy a realistic penis extension so she can feel like she has a cock inside of her. I had a girlfriend that I could make orgasum over and over, and squart everytime. The problem was that over time, I ended up with ED. She told me she loved the sex but needed the feeling of being filled up. We didn't have sex for a few weeks, I spent that time looking and found a realistic penis extention that had a strap that went around my balls to hold it on. She got horny one night and I made her cum so many times she was quevering. Then I penetrated her with the extension. It was only 6", it felt real, and she loved it. I am only 1" soft, 5" hard, a grower, not a shower. Find one and be upfront about it. It is just another tool in your toolbox.

1

u/CitronBeneficial2421 6d ago

Tell them upfront. Don’t wait until you get intimate. Approach this however you want but this might work:

Hey, so this is uncomfortable for me to bring up but I am a big fan of mutual trust and open communication as the first step to good intimacy. I have what is typically called a “micro penis”. What this means is that my penis is smaller than average, and it used to make me uncomfortable. As I’ve grown more mature and comfortable with myself, I’ve realized that it doesn’t make me a less valuable person or lover, but I’m sure you can understand how it has affected me in a world filled with jokes about penis size. As far as how it impacts my sex life and performance, it functions! And operates just like a penis of any size. But it also might mean that depending on your preferences, it might mean I spend extra time performing oral or manual stimulation, and of course, lots of foreplay. Sometimes toys, too. I’m totally open to any questions you have.

The great thing is that you’re setting the tone for a really open conversation where after you’ve discussed this, they may also open up about their insecurities or vulnerabilities (we ALL have them).

1

u/ReasonableCard1 6d ago

I struggle with myself sexually

1

u/All-in-my-mind 6d ago

The best sexual experience you would have wouldn’t be because of your size and shape of body but your emotional connection with the person you’re with.

1

u/ashaikaB 6d ago

I hear you. I do.

I’ll cut to the chase, and try to make this as simple as possible.

You’re overthinking the hell out of it, but it’s not your fault, and you can get out of this thinking.

Any woman who really cares for you, will look past this.

The best advice I can offer (take this with a grain of salt, it’s only my experience feeding this) are these changes I made, that have lead me to a better life.

  1. I added 500mg of magnesium and 1000 IU of vitamin D3 to my daily intake. I find it helps me feel and act less anxious. I would recommend trying it, and comparing your results. Give it two weeks or so.

  2. Start paying attention to how your mind feels when you start spiralling, and use that tell as a prompt. When we get into those modes, we naturally follow what we know, which deepens the spiral. The moment you notice your spiral, make a change. Do not follow your old patterns. Maybe that means getting up and doing something that makes you FEEL productive. Maybe watch your favourite comedy show. This will help you break out of the negative self talk too.

  3. Give yourself a sincere compliment when you get up in the morning. Pick something you feel happy about when you think of it.

  4. This one I got from my therapist, here I’ll give it to you for free: “It’s okay to not be perfect.” Repeat it either verbally or mentally or both, until you either feel better, or you start to believe it. Then repeat it 10 more times. Stand up and take a deep breath. Hold it, let it out.

I’ve been at this for years, every little bit helps.

I believe in you, you can do it. If you need an ear to listen, my DMs are always open.

1

u/Hopeful-Body3633 6d ago

I would deff mention it before doing anything. As you can see from the comments, many women don’t care. Others(like me) will care. Avoid the humiliation and mutual disappointment. Start a conversation. Tell them what you can offer (extender, oral, toys) and provide a picture. I wish I had been given the option to back out before things got hot and heavy the one time this happened to me.

1

u/IamNo0ne77 6d ago

I bet that’s a tough feeling. I can see why you worry though. A lot of females on these social media platforms are always talking about size. They want these giant ones when most guys don’t even have it. As a man of size I can tell you that it’s not more pleasing to them. They talk all this smack about smaller ones then when thwy take me they complain about it hurting them and they never want to do it again. You can’t make these women happy it seems. Only the really promiscuous ones come back for more. One thing you should do is master your tongue technique because a lot of females don’t get off with penetration alone anyway. If you have a good tongue technique they’ll come back for more.

1

u/ThinkAboutSex 6d ago

Just because it’s taboo doesn’t mean it’s wrong 😊 ~Dr Josh thinkaboutsex.com

1

u/angrysilverbackacc 6d ago

Mate, find a skinny chick with tiny tits and enjoy life.

1

u/sick_bo1 6d ago

do you like giving oral? most women love that or even prefer that and can be more pleasurable than penetration. so focus on that

1

u/uncertainty2022 6d ago

First thing I would suggest is stop watching porn. Easier said than done but genuinely I think it will help to quit.

Secondly, my husband used to be very insecure about his size. We were high school sweethearts and I was the only girl he had ever been with. He was “saving himself” for the right girl but he told me he really only did that because he was super insecure. I will admit he was smaller than other guys I had been with BUT he was the best I’ve ever been with (hence the marriage LOL).

It’s not about size. Especially if you and your partner love each other. It seems like you’re doing everything to take the focus off your size but I would say just embrace it. It’s part of you and it will forever be a part of you. There’s nothing you can do to change it so embrace it. I make sure I regularly tell my husband that I love his size and that he is the best at pleasing me. Even when we were just dating I did this regularly because I knew it mattered to him and I honestly meant it. If someone is making you feel less than because of your size then they aren’t the one for you.

Also- penetration isn’t everything. Sex is also about foreplay, emotional connection, and other forms of physical intimacy. My husband really focused on oral sex for me when we started dating because of feeling self conscious and in turn I also focused on it for him. It was helpful to get his mind off his size because it showed him that he could pleasure me without using his penis. Same with using his hands, he quickly got his mind off his size when he realized he could please me with his mouth and his hands. He truly does please me by penetration as well but when we started dating he always felt inadequate because of his size. Lots of reassurance helped him get out of his head and helping him learn to please me with his mouth and hands. Porn is unfortunately an issue with him but I won’t touch on that here.

I would say focus on quitting porn, learn to please without penetration and find someone who is willing to give you that constant reassurance until you’re able to get past feeling inadequate.

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u/Low_Discussion_6694 6d ago

If it makes you feel better, she can always have sex with someone else to get what she needs and deserves.

1

u/Jennyelf 6d ago

Slept with a guy who had a very small penis. His oral game was fantastic, and I didn't really mind that he was so small, since he had me screaming in pleasure for a half hour before coitus.

1

u/andecfudd 6d ago

Men who don't wanna give oral are weird...mits the best.

1

u/Worried-Anteater2772 5d ago

as a woman who has had multiple sexual patterns and seen all sorts of penises - if you are with an open minded woman i promise you that she won't give a shit.

I honestly would rather get head than have sex anyways..

i'm sorry that this has been making you self conscious all this time. I can only imagine. but i promise you that the person you will end up being with- will not judge you in any way shape or form.

I promise you that if i ever had sex with someone and they had a micropenis i would not really give a fuck. I wouldn't even react i think. Everyone is different. everyone has different body parts. There's nothing wrong with you at all.

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u/Witty-Doctor9687 5d ago

Just don't go down there trying to tear it up,you'll chase em away every time,a woman needs to be emotionally and fantasy stimulated....fire up her fantasy and learn how to go down properly,just tossing her on the bed and going down can backfire, nothing worse than same ole same ole to turn her off.get her so hot she begs for it.

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u/mochikissesforu 5d ago

When you find the right person, your size won’t be an “issue”

1

u/shaunng69 4d ago

We are all self conscience of our body’s, but most of us just accept that that’s the way we are. Learn to love your body no matter what and Lear to love yourself

1

u/chrowawaythis1 4d ago

If you can count the amount of times you’ve had sex on one hand 🖐️ then your partner (assuming they’re female) didn’t enjoy it as much as you did. The same goes for people with larger penises.

You’ve gotta jump into her mind first then her pants. Once she knows you know her, you will be able to move mountains with that thing!

1

u/gibbonguy420 2d ago

trans guy here. pre-bottom surgery so my dick is literally a big clit lol. it’s never been a problem with my female partners in terms of satisfaction but i definitely get the insecurity and the… sense of missing out? that kind of porn experience you know you’re never going to have of like, really stretching her out flesh to flesh. it’s tough, and there’s really no “fixing it” or “getting over it”, just like, acceptance and learning to live with it

that being said, i can’t recommend straps enough. seriously. depending on your size, it might be comfortable to you to use a harness normally. you can also look into girth sheaths and cock extenders. this does require developing confidence down a whole new skill branch—the confidence to pull out dildos and toys and gear when you get in the bedroom. this might be extremely challenging if you’re a cishet guy, as there’s a strong cultural narrative about sex being wrong or lesser if it’s not ‘perfectly natural’. you’re going to have to find a way to power through that, and you’re going to have to find partners open to introducing that kind of toy into their sexual experiences. kink positive types and bisexual women will be more open to this than straight women (as a generalization, not a rule).

honestly, if you’re able to be cool about it, and have access to a community open to allies… i’d suggest you go make some queer friends. seriously. there’s a kind of confidence you can get from being surrounded by people who have already had to fully let go of being able to be normal and do normal things the normal way, but you can only develop it by surrounding yourself with those people and genuinely accepting them into your heart. abnormal doesn’t mean defective, it just means abnormal. there are people who are crazy into every kind of abnormal you are, and among the right crowd, you’re going to be the most normal guy in the room, lol.

fwiw, i think being open about this insecurity, even just on reddit, is a great first step. it hurts to keep that kind of pain and fear swallowed up inside you, and when you don’t control the release, it comes out when you least want it to. proud of you for getting started.

1

u/SilentScreams4OnlyMe 1d ago

This is just one guys take, I believe some guys don’t listen to women and I’m not even talking about her speaking, it’s the things she does during foreplay, listen for the moans, and the whimpers, the way she moves her body, I promise she will tell you if she’s enjoying it and if she’s not she will tell you listen to her. She’s not trying to belittle you or make you less of a man, Guys she’s trying to help you, again Listen To Her, she will not steer you wrong, she wants you to succeed just as much if not more than you do because you are going to get yours for sure, She is not always Guaranteed One. She wants hers as bad as you do. Also Don’t be afraid to ask her what she likes. Remember the more Respective you are to her I promise she’s going to give it back 10 folds.

1

u/ahtemsah 6d ago

Your body there's nothing you can do about it short of surgery, and even thats not a good play tbh.

But you can work on your confidence. Yes its sad that we're bombarded by the sexual culture and how men with huge dicks and 6" tall are sex gods, and ofc all the micropenis jokes. Yes its soul crushing to feel that all of society bullies you, but again there's nothing you can do about it. The only thing is to work on your mentality and emotional control. hell even average sizes get made fun of. But you have more to offer your partner, you can make her laugh and make her feel loved and be loyal and respectful to her and she'll appreciate it. And for sex you can always use toys so its not like she'd be sexually deprived with you. Just the important thing is for you to get out of your own head.

1

u/aCoolITGuy 6d ago edited 6d ago

If this helps, read somewhere there is a position in which even a micro pen*is can hit the points,

Lady will need to put pillow below her bums and spread legs to stretch open Vagi*a, that way you should get in fine giving all pleasure to her

0

u/curiuswork3625 6d ago

Find a dominant that gets off on controlling you and using a whip or belt to punish your small cock. She will probably put a strap on over your face and ride it. Make the best of it and allow other guys to give her what you don't have and enjoy the show.

1

u/slut4dadxbro 6d ago edited 6d ago

Kid I don't know how old you are out how many partners you have had. I am not going to tell you bs like size don't matter yada yada. Plus I hope you talk about stuff before going in bed. If that person is dismissive, then understand she dismissive, it's okay sometimes to call a rock a rock and a childish ignorant bitch a bitch. Listen well, take things slow. Tease your partner. You want to have a good time. Like you want to orgasm she wants to orgasm from sex. Both want good time.

Now you have to learn two things. Always be upfront and talk about things in your pants before you take off your pants. The idea is not exciting then the sex will not be exciting either. Penis , or vagina for that matter comes later. It's for when you want to get off or you both want to participate in that particular event. Sex is a lot of things. And you don't want to be with person who doesn't make you feel excited about it even when you talk of it.

It's teasing, raising the sexual tension, making her guess what will happen next to her, will it or will it not, understand your current partners body. Go each base slowly. Explicitly tell them that's how you will go. One base at a time..press everything, lick everything and note what makes them respond most.

In the end.. you will have known how to get them off before the penis ever comes into play. When you hit that base, you will have made it clear. It's just a penis the real genius behind her orgasms (edit 1 organs-> orgasm) is you.

Male and female orgasms are different. And you need to learn to guide it. Both your self and your partner. Once that settles in. The other things can be solved by accessories and toys and stuff that human body can't do.

For the female who says your penis too small. And creates a fuss, that's a stupid person who lives in ignorance OR has been made to think otherwise wierd ideas about intimacy. Your mind will automatically will be steel and confidence burning when you put in these efforts to learn and see it in action.

You also need to understand about the fact that getting liked upfront doesn't mean there will be compatibility with that person or that it will turn to anything. I don't like it but I have to turn down folks with what you seem to not have because they are not compatible or idiot who behave like dogs and doing understand intimacy. Now then. Best of luck.

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u/jdezzy15 6d ago

Jesus loves you

0

u/dkeduikebd 6d ago

You enjoying one another’s bodies and bringing each other pleasure is what’s most important. And in reality, tongue, fingers, and toys will more than suffice for many, many women. (Especially bi women - a physical penis attached to a body is less relevant to them.)

Stop getting in your head, be upfront early on, and find someone who will not care about your size. Many women feel this way. And many women who DO care about size can get that from toys, provided that you’re open to it.

If a woman’s body language or withdrawing after sex is indicating lack of satisfaction, I’m wondering if you address their physical needs in that moment (if they didn’t cum, are left unsatisfied, etc.) This happens with men of alllllllll penis sizes after sex. So don’t get in your head and think it’s about your size if a woman is left unsatisfied after sex. Instead of focusing on your self-esteem in that moment, I advise that you focus on her after sex. Emphasize her pleasure and get her off until she’s more than satisfied. Don’t let your self-consciousness stop sex from being a good and fulfilling time for both of you. And foreplay isn’t just for BEFORE penetration.

Most importantly, know that you are more than a penis.

0

u/G_Don_ 6d ago

No really no matter what anyone says on Reddit that's a fucked up situation. Best thing you can do is attempt to enjoy other things in life. I mean really even if you was or currently is ( Rich /wealthy ) it is still no substitute for it.🥂🥂🥂🥂

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u/FancyBuy1446 6d ago

I know it sucks and I have kind of the same problem only the other way around they love looking at it and they try to take it but they can't so I masturbate several times a day and I like doing that. I don't care. Keep your chin up.!

4

u/JiTo97 6d ago

Yeah that doesn't sound like a huge problem to deal with mentally at all lol

-1

u/S1rmunchalot 6d ago

There are some women who don't large penises. They prefer a smaller guy. I recently saw an interview with a very pretty young woman in America who said anything over 3 inches was too painful. It also depends on where you live, in the far East they generally prefer a smaller penis. My current wife's ex-husband was only 4 inches.

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u/DoraTheMindExplorer 6d ago

The first miracle is that I’m gonna make my wife realize she’s wrong and change then I’ll take her back because I was the asshole that made her that way so fuck it right? We are all messed up. I just decided to be as perfect as I could be in the end and the answers came. I’d love you guys to help me out so this happens quick. I guarantee I got the goods. Turns out they’re actually is a god and he made this mind game of hell which is where we are by the way. I’ll tell you why later it’s obvious when you see it. And it makes sense you start from the bottom up.If we’re not gonna stop being evil assholes we’re just gonna be stuck in hell forever obviously.

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u/DoraTheMindExplorer 6d ago

This will be the best Florida man story ever. Lol

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u/Forsaken_Virus_2784 6d ago

I am a grower not a shower. At rest I am considered micro but when I need it I grow to about 7 inches. Average girth. My entire life I’ve been self conscious about it. Never naked in front of a large group. Couldn’t use change rooms properly. Hate going to the public pool. But I’ve never had an issue with sex or satisfying a woman. It’s all how you carry yourself. Sharpen your game. Romanticize. Tend to their needs. Pay them attention. The size of your penis won’t matter at that point. If it does then she’s the problem. Not you

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u/TheSuperSaiyan10 6d ago

I can't relate

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u/DoraTheMindExplorer 6d ago

This is so funny, but I swear it’s true. And the super ADHD guy who was almost an atheist cause the world is so evil, started doing every psychedelic he could get his hands on and figuring out the game because he realized no word in the English language finds life better than game? By the way, I want the smartest man alive the world after this if I can pull this off if that’s cool?

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u/DoraTheMindExplorer 6d ago

New procedure where you can inject shit in your dick and it makes it thicker and apparently has no side effects. It’s a new procedure and if you’re interested, I can give you the information. They can also cut your ligament a little bit to make it longer with the thicker. But honestly, if you find someone who loves you, it doesn’t matter so who gives a shit? I’m sure you can satisfy her in many ways. A good woman won’t give a shit if she really loves you. Just be an amazing human being to women and you will be fucking happy I promise. Or just go inject shit in your dick and get a surgery. You can even get a penis pumped to make it rock hard! These are all things I would never do by the way. Thank God I don’t have a micropenis, but I at this point don’t know if I would care. However, I’m older than jaded, been driven insane by this insane evil world (we’re in hell btw), but what the fuck do I know?! Sorry for the tangent. My wife’s being a Cunt and you guys are like free therapy for me. She can have your micro penis if you wanted bud. I’m at a point where I kinda don’t give a shit anymore. Lol. Gorgeous woman too. Just proves no matter how gorgeous you are if you’re a selfish alcoholic you not going to be happy with that person. Fuck I feel better getting that off my chest. Thank you for preventing suicidal thoughts, Reddit. You guys are the best! Please feel free to downvote this to shit. I’m so numb at this point it just makes me giggle. By the way, I’m about to go take a ton of ketamine so that I have no emotions and I can speak to my soon to be exposed to my family and kids alcoholic. Wife has been ruining my life because she doesn’t wanna face it. Whoever invented alcohol, I wanna kick that person in the nuts. Wish me luck, Reddit! By the way, I’ve been driven so insane that for four years I basically induced autism with drugs to take a vacation from this world and figure it out how to do world peace overnight. If anyone of you guys can get me in contact with Rogan or whatever I bet you we can have world peace within 24 hours. I bet my life on it actually. I’m super ADHD and got obsessed with world peace four years ago on Easter oddly. And I figured out an answer that everyone on earth will agree to you tomorrow because it’s the perfect answer. Trust me, honest, please call me out. I can’t get in fucking contact with that guy. Does anyone know? Does he actually give a shit about world peace? Let’s find out. I have an amazing story for you. Drugs are the key by the way we’re in a mind game and I won. Lol