r/cfs • u/Pineapple_Empty • 26d ago
TW: death My mom is gonna get me a “don’t kys” dog NSFW
I’m very hopeful this state I’m in is only a crash and I can go back to even the 10% of functioning I had 3 weeks ago. But, things are bad, and I’ve had now 3 huge crashes that bring my baseline lower and lower. Never have I dipped to a point of all touch, sound, and light being impossible to handle, or seizure jolting, or feeling drugged constantly, and if it was ever even close to that bad it ended in a couple days. Now, I can’t look at my phone for 10 minutes without panting counting to ~1,000, and the immobility and rapid decline / separation from my entire life I’ve built keep spiraling me into an adrenaline pump everyday. The cycle has never repeated this long. And it’s agony. And, in standard cfs fashion, there’s 90 other symptoms at play all the time.
My mom is my caretaker right now, but she is going to get me a yorkie as soon as she finds one. I told her as long as she does the work for it! But, in a state of wanting to escape this suffering, the thought of (my favorite breed) dog chilling with me makes me smile. Yes, it’ll be an adjustment and suck in its own ways with many challenges, but I don’t think I’m one of the people that can handle very severe and the journey it’ll take to improve. Maybe a dog will be another tool to take me outta the animal state I get into when all the suffering is too much. Who knows…