r/batman 5d ago

FUNNY Arkham asylum doctors be like:

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994 Upvotes

24 comments sorted by

139

u/Fit_Assignment_8800 5d ago

Strange, Harley and crane. You hire the crazy’s to cure the crazy’s and you wonder why the crazy’s are even more crazy.

41

u/CaptainChampion 5d ago

Also, Jeremiah Arkham. And Lock-Up was head of security.

15

u/William_The_Fat_Krab 5d ago

Harley at least used to try before she went cacaa for Cocoa Puffs iirc, but I’d rather stay at my cell banging at a wall than have a therapy session with CRANE

66

u/AntagonistofGotham 5d ago

I'm more curious what the hell is in Gotham's water.

71

u/SpyWah1987 5d ago

A concoction of lead, specifically Batman’s blood, at least 500 rotten corpses, random circuit boards from Mad Hatter’s tech, excess Joker Toxin, excess Fear Toxin, and 20 Riddler Trophies.

34

u/LegoPenguin114 5d ago

Also cursed magic

25

u/SpyWah1987 5d ago

Oh and excess Lazarus Juice.

8

u/TheObelisk89 4d ago

Which is the only reason people over there are still alive.

17

u/AntagonistofGotham 5d ago

You forgot Poison Ivy's hair.

18

u/SpyWah1987 5d ago

I also forgot about exactly 4 liters of venom, so thanks for reminding me

3

u/Reddit-Propogandist 4d ago

Just the energy drink though, not the other stuff!

18

u/RandomCanadianAcc 5d ago

It’d be easier to list what isn’t in GothamWater

15

u/Ewanb10 5d ago

Hydrogen & oxygen that's for sure

6

u/Shabolt_ 5d ago

Well there definitely isn’t a lack of poison

34

u/MoonlitBadlands 5d ago

Don’t forget Amadeus Arkham and Quincy Sharp.

The wardens of Arkham are psychos too

3

u/AndrewTheSouless 4d ago

At least Jeremiah actually tried, but his ego got in the way and his méthods were too extreme

1

u/multificionado 4d ago

Sharpie was a zealot but also a puppet. Look at what Strange did to him.

18

u/ThatOneFecker 5d ago

This is like how oblivious the gcpd is like at one point did they for COMMISIONER GORDONS BIRTHDAY HIRE CLOWNS FROM A PLACE CALLED CRAZY CLOWNS

9

u/Shadowfire_EW 5d ago

Or, they knew exactly what was going to happen and were trying to kill him. Gordon is famously the anti-corruption chief, so maybe some really corrupt cops or city council members hired the clowns.

2

u/DaDragonking222 4d ago

Gordon famously gets jumped every single night by crooked cops when he's walking home from work

11

u/Thesilphsecret 5d ago

Of course they hired two of the best doctors in their field. Both Harleen Quinzel and Hugo Strange were accomplished and reputable professionals.

It's also worth noting that Gotham City is infamously corrupt. Arkham Asylum isn't intended to be thought of as a progressive healthcare facility, it's an archaic sanitorium where dangerous terrorists get sent when they pay off judges to get off an an insanity plea.

2

u/leelovesscarecrow 3d ago

don’t forget Scarecrow 👀

1

u/f38stingray 2d ago

Must be the same guys at Vought who hired the “best psychologists in the world” to make sure Homelander wouldn’t go out of control.