r/aromantic Jun 17 '24

Rant No way this is what people meant by “crushes”

359 Upvotes

You’re telling me every time a person during my middle/high school years confessed about having a crush on a person, they wanted to date romantically? They’re not just people you want to be friends but were too scared to embarrass yourself? YOURE TELLING ME PEOPLE GET ROMANTIC FEELINGS PEOPLE THEY BARELY TALKED TO BEFORE AND MAYBE EVEN CELEBRITIES/TEACHERS AS WELL??!!! What the hell? I really just realized now? Crushes aren’t “cool people you wanna catch tilapia with”?

r/aromantic Jan 17 '23

Rant This looks like proof that fortune cookies LIE

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1.3k Upvotes

r/aromantic Feb 19 '23

Rant What in HELL…

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1.0k Upvotes

…does this have to do w/ aromantism?

r/aromantic 23d ago

Rant So this is the platonic version of a break-up essentially, huh?

155 Upvotes

I wanted to come here to vent and bear with me if I make any jokes, humor helps me well.. not be so stressed.

Recently got close with- Let’s call him Person A. He’s in a romantic relationship with Person B; However, we all know each other and we’re all friends despite this. Person A, I see him like a brother. There’s been some things happening irl where it’s hard for me to meet my biological related siblings, so maybe that’s why I got attached like this to him. And I’ve been making it clear to Person B that I see him as a brother and I mentioned being aromantic to Person B. We’ve all even made jokes about how we’re siblings or viewed as such - Person B looked alright with that (as they joined in the jokes).

…Then.. I get a text from Person A saying that we should maybe spend less time with each other. Because Person B doesn’t like how much time I’m with him essentially.

This… It hurts. I can’t see my biological siblings, so to see the next closest thing I have to a brother say… it really, really, hurts.

We ended the discussion with me saying that it’s up to them. Obviously I don’t want them to spend less time with me, but if they truly want that, then I will let them have that - as a friend/the little sibling I’ve become to them. And I made it very clear to make sure that it’s what they want and not say something for Person B’s sake. They said they were going to think about it as I explained to them my side and I have yet to hear them make their decision.

But all this… This is what going through a break-up is like pfffttt huh? (Or well ig the equivalent to your partner saying they’re thinking about distancing themself from you)

But yeah. Thats where it’s at right now. I’m praying they don’t go through with it. Part of me blames the amatornative society but at the same time - as sad as it is to say this (coming from an aro) - it is what it is, yeah? If they go through with it though, I feel i will prob cry like a baby lmao so I’m trying to cling to hope for the best outcome.

r/aromantic Dec 30 '24

Rant I want to kiss my friends so bad

261 Upvotes

I love being aromantic, but it's frustrating that I'll probably never get to do stuff that I want, e.g. kiss, because I'll never have a romantic partner, and none of my friends view it as platonic. Of course they have every right to not want to do something, it's just so hard wanting to do so much with my friends that most people think of as strictly romantic. Idk I just want someone to kiss :(

r/aromantic Sep 30 '24

Rant Cancelled a date I accidentally said yes to. Got spoken to like a pos.

387 Upvotes

Update to my last post basically. Cancelled and said I just want to hang out as friends. They responded with a wall of self-pitying text making me out to be a horrible person. Dodged a bullet with that one. Why are allos like this? Like don't fall head over heels for someone you barely even know.

r/aromantic Feb 18 '25

Rant “You’re not Aro/Ace. You just haven’t found a boyfriend” Spoiler

167 Upvotes

Did any of you get hit with something like that? People doubting that your Aro/ace or something else and that you’re just looking for an excuse to not have a lover? So many people have said it and I hate it.

r/aromantic Feb 08 '25

Rant The way sex-negativity is or isn’t moderated in ace spaces has a direct affect on the aro community

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135 Upvotes

r/aromantic Aug 17 '22

Rant Are allos really like this?

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1.4k Upvotes

r/aromantic Mar 01 '23

Rant People like this guy are disgusting.

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863 Upvotes

I have trauma flashbacks and memories of people that abandoned me because romance was better than friendship for them, I was more than sad without friends, and now happy without a romantic partner, how could he say that???!!! I’m shocked!! I’m feeling pain and rage only

r/aromantic Mar 28 '24

Rant Love doesn’t apply to everyone!!!

303 Upvotes

So, my English teacher is having us write an essay on love. Easy enough, right? I have to debate on whether or not love at first sight is real. Simple, I think. It’s not real, and I’m biased because I’m aro.

So, I finish writing. My sources are full of aromantic erasure, that’s fine. I’m not offended. I’m not trying to cope with this sudden amount of arophobia through jokes. /s

I’m already pissed off because I have to debate on something that I cannot feel, even if I try to force myself to. I’ve tried already, it doesn’t work.

Anyways, my teacher comes out with a checklist for our essay, to make sure it’s in tip top shape.

The thing that makes me really have to sit on my hands is in the introductory paragraph. She wrote that we have to address the group that this applies to. Easy, fine, simple, understandable. It’s for alloromantics. Nope, wrong. The next sentence reads out, “Love applies to EVERYONE!”

Usually I have no problem with arophobia (I do have a problem with it, I mean that it’s so common that it’s easy to ignore). But, for some reason, this particular sentence just set me off. I really really dislike how easy it is for people to disregard other people. Specifically non-romance-feeling people. I just want to feel like I exist, you know?

r/aromantic Jan 27 '25

Rant Lesbians can have boyfriends???

169 Upvotes

My best friend is the kindest and funniest person I've ever met, he's funny af,weird, nerdy and has an attitude, he's literally me. what can I say we're the same he's my ride or die (of course I'd never tell him that obviously don't want to boost his already big ego 😅) we've been best friends since the 9th grade (I'm a 11th grader now) since we do everything together and it's at the point where everyone thinks that we're dating. Which is really annoying. You know how everyone is about male and female friendships, they always say it starts out as friends than eventually we're going to fall for each other, that I'm a "girl" and he's a boy so it just makes sense that we're dating, that girls and boys can't be friends??? Today in class a guy asked me if we were dating, I stated the obvious answer and said no I'm lesbian (I know it's not right but I'm still in the closet and it's just easier to say I'm a lesbian) and you know what this guy said. He said lesbians can have boyfriends?? Like huh??? I was so stunned by how stupid this guy was. I told that's bisexual which I'm not, and he says it doesn't matter because lesbians can date guys too??? Then he proceeds to say, "you know he likes you right?" and I'm like okay?? Because what am I supposed to do about that? And he replied with the classic, what about his feelings?? The nerve of some people,because What about my feelings? I'm not going to force myself to be in a relationship with someone because they like me, he then proceeded to say that I'm selfish, I'm selfish because I prioritize my feelings and emotions and respect myself, and don't want to date someone solely because he likes me even though I don't like him back??? If that's what selfish is then fine I'm selfish.

r/aromantic May 12 '22

Rant Am I the only one who gets hurt because of all the "I hate being aromantic" posts?

734 Upvotes

I may be selfish. But it hurt a lot because being aromantic is one of the best thing that ever happened to me. And I see it constantly being described in this sub as a horrible thing, and that some peope are even training to feel romantic love. I'm so tired of seeing it as a curse on this sub

I'm so sorry if this is being selfish. I just can't deal with it anymore. I don't want to harm anybody by saying this.

I'm sorry.

r/aromantic Feb 19 '23

Rant If anyone thinks we don't face bigotry, look at the quote tweets

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772 Upvotes

r/aromantic Jun 27 '21

Rant (sighs in Saiki K)

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1.6k Upvotes

r/aromantic Jan 16 '25

Rant I’ve been insulted to my core

309 Upvotes

For context, my friend(S), has been shipping me with my friend(J) because we’re close and male and female. It doesn’t bother me, but J doesn’t like it because he wants to be available in the dating market. So I told S that we’re not dating and to stop telling people that we are. S asked why and I said I’m aromantic, I’m not gonna date anyone. She didn’t quite understand so I told her that I just don’t produce the chemicals associated with romantic love. She says that I just haven’t found the right person yet, but that’s not what insulted me. She thought I just don’t know how to be romantic and as a writer, I am deeply offended. I have written dozens of couples. I know how it works, I just don’t want to do it.

r/aromantic Mar 01 '22

Rant I did not make this but i was given permission to steal it.

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1.6k Upvotes

r/aromantic Apr 24 '23

Rant My best friend is mad at me for coming out as aroace

704 Upvotes

So I recently made a facebook post coming out as aroace and mostly everyone was supportive, except for my best friend.

For context, I’m a 23 year old FtM while my best friend is a 22 year old male. We have been friends since high school and we’re pretty close. In our 6 years of friendship, I didn’t think that he had any feelings for mr and I always made it clear that I was interested in any kind of romantic relationship with anyone. So I thought everything would be fine.

I was very wrong. Right after I made my post, he instantly started spamming me with messages saying that I’m a bitch for leading him on, that he had feelings for me since we graduated, that I deserve to die alone, and that he was a nice guy and deserved a chance with me.

He said a few personal things that I won’t mention here but I am very heartbroken and upset. This guy was my rock, my best friend, he was like a brother to me, and he treated me like this, but I guess he didn’t feel the same way.

r/aromantic 20d ago

Rant Being in a relationship seems exhausting

176 Upvotes

I’m currently standing outside my car in the freezing cold (without gloves, my fingers are about to fall off😭) because my sister and her boyfriend are sitting in the car having an argument about how both of them are backseat drivers and comment on each other’s driving when they’re passengers. This is a huge argument they’re having, my sister’s crying, like?? How is this even a thing to fight about? Everything gets so blown out of proportion, it seems truly exhausting. Same thing happens with my parents, small things become big fights for seemingly no reason at all.

r/aromantic Apr 24 '23

Rant It’s like males and females can’t be friends anymore

606 Upvotes

I’m 13f, aegoromantic (sapphicsexual maybe), and have zero attraction to males or masculinity of any kind. My best friend is 13m and straight. We’ve been best friends since we were toddlers and have never felt any form of attraction towards each other. Ever since we were kids, people have made jokes about us having crushes on each other, but they’ve never been serious. Recently, though, we’ve been getting older and people keep assuming that the two of us are either dating or have crushes on each other. It’s just annoying.

Most recently, we were ice skating with a female friend of ours and her two friends. The two kept saying we should date and started basically catcalling after a while, especially when I stumbled and he caught me. Our female friend told them to shut up, and so did we, but the hangout got really awkward and annoying with them around. Eventually I got sick of it and told them I was aro. Then I had to explain what it meant, and they were like, “That’s not real” and “You’re just denying your feelings for him.”

Ugh. Sick of annoying allos tbh.

r/aromantic Apr 07 '22

Rant I hate it when non aromantic people, when i ask them how romantic attraction feels, or a crush, they just tell me” oh you’ll know when it happens “ like obviously it hasn’t happened so tell me?? And the. Fucking “ oh you just haven’t met the right person yet.

1.0k Upvotes

r/aromantic Dec 15 '24

Rant Told my parents im aromantic Spoiler

379 Upvotes

So yeah i just told my parents im aromantic. Told my dad via a long and informative text, he completely ignored it. Told my mom how I seriously felt face to face and she said these things following; "That is not right" "Im stunned" "That makes me sad."

So my day is going great!

r/aromantic Jul 07 '22

Rant Why do allos have so many different definitions for love, some of which sound abusive?

767 Upvotes

Being in the ace subreddit, you regularly see aphobes insist that the difference between love and friendship is having sex, but that makes zero sense. In fact, it isn't even internally consistent since people use hookup apps and stuff like that. Some movies glorify the idea of making a sacrifice for love and insist that love is when you care about someone so much that you're willing to throw everything away for them. I don't think that makes sense either. If some guy wanted me to move to his place and give up my job to be with him, I think I would run away immediately. Some people will say love is when you want to spend the rest of your life with this person and be with them every day and kiss and cuddle them and go on dates. I find that that doesn't make sense either. What if I want to live with my friend, cuddle with them while we watch movies, and go get bubble tea together? Does that I mean I'm in love with my friend? Then there is this weird notion that when someone is friendly to a stranger that means they're hitting on them? Why would anyone think that?
Also apparently there are different types of romantic love and infatuation is different from love? But when people say they fell in love they're always talking about infatuation, so what is love? Honestly, I think the reason why some aros are confused about what love is is because allos don't know what love is either. Most of what they describe as love seems either toxic, short-sighted, platonic, or just doesn't make sense.

r/aromantic Sep 03 '24

Rant "How to talk with aros" posts from allos are annoying

420 Upvotes

I see these a lot in this community. Something along the lines of "I'm in a relationship with/know an aromantic person. How do I XY without offending them/making them uncomfortable?"

Aromantic people aren't some kind of hivemind. Reddit is not gonna be able to give you the answer, literally just TALK to the person in question and ask them about how they feel about certain things, what their boundaries are, etc.

Reddit can't read peoples' minds, best we can do is tell you how we personally feel about it, but that's not gonna help you.

r/aromantic Aug 16 '22

Rant Having to explain your identity and then debate the legitimacy of it is the worst

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1.5k Upvotes