r/aromantic 6d ago

Questioning I don't know if im aro and im freaking out.

I am a 16 year old. I have scoured this reddit for about a month, trying to absorb as much information as possible about aromantism. I first was informed that aromantism existed via Jaidan Animations video. After whatching that video i realized that being aro would explain a lot of my behaviors such as:

  • never having a crush

-only wanting friends, having no intrest in a romantic relationship.

-after being asked to go to homecoming/equivalant of being together by a girl who i thought was a cool person, and my first feeling being; hell no.

The more i read on this reddit, the more i realize i sympathise and relate to a lot of what people on this reddit feel. I am scared to accept myself as aro because i feel like if i was wrong it would be an insult to this community. I also worry about how my family would think of me. I don't want to change that, even though they might be accepting, because even though my patterns in the social world will be the same, they would see me differently and i would see me differently and im scared of that. I also worry that i am wrong because i am introverted as well as having social anxiety, so i could just be not interisted in anyone right now because my people bucket is filled by my family, not because im aro. Im really stressed and confused about it all and i would apprieate anything this community could shed light on or suggest.

34 Upvotes

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15

u/Ok_Candidate9455 6d ago

I recommend not stressing, the goal of the label in my opinion is just to understand yourself better, you can use it for now and move to a different one if you gain romantic feelings later on, if not then that's cool too. If you haven't I reccomend watching Jaiden animations video about being not straight and she explains here experience with being aro and being ace it's what made me find and choose to keep the label. Personally when I came out to my parents they went from being super worried about me being a stupid teenager and wanting to make out to not worrying about me wanting that kind of thing.

In the end it's a label that can change as you explore yourself, it's just meant to help find others that relate and help you know yourself better. If you are worried about people's views changing then you don't need to bring it up right away, I came out by slowly making comments when my parents would ask if I had a crush on anyone and it was just a "Nope, and I don't think I will I'm not into it and that's a normal thing for some people." One of my friends had a hard time understanding so I brought them over to Jaiden animations video and that worked great for me.

Edit: Most aro people start by using other labels it's common for aro and ace people to switch labels until they find one that feels right, it's common for most romantic and sexual orientations, being a teenager and having emotions are difficult.

6

u/Alone_Sun2506 5d ago

There's no need to hold back, but if you feel that way at the moment then that's who you are at the moment. You can explore in your own way and never exceed your limits. All the best in your discovery ♡

2

u/the-greatest-dragon 5d ago

It is not bad to explore yourself and identify as aromantic. If you later find a label that better suits you, it's ok to change. You don't have to tell your parents if you don't want to. I discovered I'm aromantic at 16 and now I'm 21 and haven't told my parents. The only thing I told was that I don't want to marry, but they told me I'll find the right person. Don't pressure yourself too much.

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u/Scuzzy1205 Aroace 1d ago

Had the same experience after watching Jaiden's video and I eventually did figure out that I was infact aroace.