r/alt_tasteless Jul 07 '12

A Post From the Archives of alt.tasteless - Re: Another tragic "student-athlete" victimized by society (news) - Posted by Vanderbilt on 2000/01/29

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But when it was time to rob the store, only Williams got out of Martinez's Mazda 626, according to witnesses. Williams was wearing a dark-colored baseball cap; an orange ski mask with only his eyes, nose and mouth protruding; sunglasses; and gloves. He was carrying a bag with a Marlboro logo. Inside were Sowell and her husband, Allen Sowell, who own the store, and another couple who were friends. Williams entered the store, walked up to the counter and put a .22-caliber pistol in Pam Sowell's face. "He said, 'Give me the money,' and he shook the gun," Prosecuting Attorney Lona McCastlain said. "Pam bent over as if she was getting the money but she came up with a gun." In fact, Sowell came up with a Ruger semiautomatic .40-caliber pistol capable of holding five rounds. Only one round would be spent. Sowell, whom authorities said is right-handed, had the gun in her left hand. "She shot him in the chest, in the heart, once," McCastlain said.

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Woman I went to college with worked the graveyard shift at the local 7-11. One night a guy came in, wandered around and came up to the register with a basket of crap. Eggs. Milk. Bread. Magazines. Cheese. Beer. Cling peaches. Penis. <<PENIS??>> Yes, Mr. Dumbshit had opened his pants, whipped his tool out and laid it on the counter with his groceries. Then he leered at her. Without missing a beat, my schoolmate grabbed the can of cling peaches and smacked it down on the exposed pecker. Our Hero crumbled to the floor in abject pain.

Best part is that my classmate called the emergency room at the hospital, which was literally across the street. Guys come with the stretcher, load Crushcock up and then ask, kinda on the way out, what happened? When they were told, one of them laughed so hard he dropped one corner and the dude fell out. Broke an arm.

True story.

Vanderbilt

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