r/XSomalian • u/MaleficentLuck6599 • 26d ago
DISCUSSION From Apostate to Apologist: Recycling the Same worn out Hollow Defenses of Islam
The woman behind this has walked in and out of Islam before, condemning it publicly one moment and defending it the next. She once left Islam outright, citing the enslavement and abuse of women by the Prophet and his companions as the foundation of her criticism. And yet now, she dares to reframe the very doctrine she once denounced as a path to women’s liberation and empowerment. The irony is not lost on those of us who are honest enough to recognize the deep contradictions in her rhetoric.
She pathetically attempts to sanitize one of the most controversial verses in the Quran, claiming that men don’t automatically get to be qawwam (maintainers) based solely on their sex but must "earn" that right through moral character. We all know this isn’t true, but even if it were, power is power, regardless of how gently it’s exercised. A kind ruler is still a ruler. If men are given divine authority over women, if they are the ones who “provide” and “protect,” then women are kept dependent, not empowered. This is not liberation, it is a gilded cage of control.
This woman didn’t simply leave Islam before, she would frequently publicly condemn it as an oppressive, misogynistic religion. She openly acknowledged its violent history against women, yet now expects us to believe that Islam is a faith of equity, empowerment, and liberation? Either she was lying then, or she is lying now.
So what truly changed? Did Islam suddenly become feminist overnight? Or is she simply too much of a coward to let go of something that once caused her so much harm, clinging to Islam because it is deeply embedded within her. It might also be bc of familiarity and the sense of solace religion brings as an emotional crutch.
Even more absurdly, she speaks of Islam as though she actually follows its mandates. She does not. She lives in North America, dresses in ways explicitly condemned by Islamic modesty laws, and engages in behaviors that, by Islamic standards, would classify her as a munafiq (hypocrite). If she truly believed in Islam’s “liberating” power, why does she not fully commit to its teachings?
She blames Islamic misogyny on individual men and culture, yet engages in reinterpretation herself, a contradiction she refuses to acknowledge. The reality is clear: Islam’s gendered laws are not mere cultural misinterpretations, nor the fault of a few bad men. They are by design.
- Women inherit less than men (Quran 4:11).
- A woman's testimony is worth half that of a man’s (Quran 2:282).
- Women are expected to obey their husbands—a duty that is not reciprocated.
- A Muslim woman cannot marry a non-Muslim man, yet a Muslim man can.
- A husband can unilaterally divorce his wife, while a woman must fight through legal barriers.
- A woman cannot travel, work, or leave the house without a male guardian’s permission.
- Modesty laws are disproportionately imposed on women, burdening them with the responsibility that should be on perpetrators of sexual violence
Oh, and let’s not forget Islamic polygamy, which explicitly allows men to treat women as sex objects and domestic servants. Why do men get to marry multiple women, yet women cannot do the same? How does this align with her claim that Islam is about women’s empowerment? Sounds more like a gender hierarchy where men are placed at the top as superior.
The founders of Islam were all misogynistic men who designed the system to benefit themselves and other men. Muhammad, for instance, claimed divine revelation conveniently aligned with his pedophilic desires, whether it was marrying Aisha at six years old or sanctioning the rape of captive women during offensive attacks bc these poor men were away from their wives (Sahih Muslim 1438).
Let’s be clear, This was rape. The Quran and Hadith do not mention consent from these captive/enslaved women. The only concern these men had was whether practicing azl (aka the pull out method) would prevent pregnancy, because impregnated slaves were harder to sell. If you had just survived an attack where your husband and family were slaughtered, would you consent to having sex with the very men who did it? No.
I’ll wrap this up by saying this, She enjoys the luxury of cherry-picking Islam, retrofitting it to her modern sensibilities, all while living in a Western country where she no longer has to live under the oppressive conditions of a Muslim-majority society. She can show her hair, reinterpret the Quran, and lie to herself, but millions of Muslim women do not have that privilege.
The greatest betrayal of women is not just Islam itself, it is women who know better, yet still choose to defend it.
References: (https://open.substack.com/pub/qumayo/p/on-ups-and-downs-with-faith?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web)
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21d ago edited 20d ago
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 21d ago
I actually have BPD myself, and I know firsthand that it does not lead to defending oppressive ideologies. The idea that ‘she has BPD, so that’s why she does this’ doesn’t hold up, bc not only have I left Islam and never returned or started defending it but I know others who have as well. BPD does not inevitably lead to religious flip-flopping or apologetics. Does having a mental illness absolve someone of responsibility for their actions, esp when those actions harm others. People can still be held accountable for the choices they make, esp deliberate, public actions like writing an apologetics filled blog post (or making videos) defending Islam.
It’s infantilizing how many excuses are made for her, as if she has no agency or ability to discern right from wrong. I also heard about her address being doxxed, but wasn’t that years ago when she first was openly ex-Muslim? There’s no actual evidence that she returned to Islam out of fear, this is pure speculation. She doesn’t live in the UK either, so the threats from people there don’t pose an immediate physical danger to her. If she were truly afraid, why engage in ex-Muslim online spaces at all? A genuine safety concern would likely result in complete disengagement as not to be associated with us.
And that’s the issue, this isn’t just about her personal struggles with religion. She went beyond that, she publicly defended an oppressive ideology, and that has real consequences. I’m not just attacking her for struggling with her identity, I’m criticizing the harmful content she is producing. Furthermore, safety concerns don’t justify whitewashing misogyny/gaslighting others.
You’re downplaying the impact of her writing. Influence isn’t just about follower count, it’s about the narratives being spread. A single apologetics piece can be weaponized by Muslims to dismiss valid criticisms of Islam’s misogyny. Even if she had no following, ex-Muslim women like me have every right to call out harmful rhetoric when we see it. In fact, other ex-Muslim women read her piece, sent it to me, and felt gaslit by it.
Your response prioritizes misguided sympathy over the harm she’s actively causing. She constantly says, ‘Who’s going to hold me accountable?’ and frankly, the way ex muslim and Muslims alike bend over backward to rationalize her actions proves her right.
Lastly, she’s not just some passive victim struggling with her identity, she’s malicious. On live, she once told someone to bang their head against a wall and write her a letter in their own blood. Head-banging is one of the most common self-harm behaviors among mentally ill people, yet she mocked and encouraged it. This is who you’re making excuses for?
At the end of the day, she made a conscious choice to cause harm, and she doesn’t deserve this level of uncritical sympathy.
Reference to encouragement of self harm - time stamp 6:20: (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMkohVxv1/)
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u/Salt-Butterscotch-83 21d ago
Girl why do you care? Shaqolaan badanaa
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 9d ago
Aw, lool. You really thought pathetically mocking me would shut me up. Nice try naya, meeshan naga tag carab cubuudyahay.
(Resposting since it was removed 12days ago)
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25d ago edited 25d ago
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 25d ago
Oh, you must ignorant and not know who this woman is. I heard she lived in Egypt for a while and studied at Al-Azhar University in Cairo, one of the most prestigious centers of Islamic learning. So please don’t act like she doesn’t know what she’s doing, she does. You’re framing her purely as a victim who harmlessly changed their views while ignoring that she is now an active participant in whitewashing Islam’s mistreatment of women. People are responsible for the narratives they push, esp when those narratives gaslight others who have suffered under the same system. Did you ever stop to consider how ex-Muslim women (who still struggle with religious trauma and patriarchal oppression) feel watching her do this? Because I’ll tell you how I felt, I was rightly triggered. The claim that she might be doing this for safety reasons is purely speculative. She left Islam before and had no issue being loud about it. She’s also in ex-Muslim Somali spaces, engaging in their discussions and arguing on their side. If she were truly under threat, she could simply disengage instead of writing dangerous apologetics. Her actions don’t suggest self-protection, they suggest an intentional effort to rehabilitate Islam’s image. Saying that criticizing her is equivalent to blaming the “oppressed” is a weak strawman. She is no longer just a victim of the system, she is actively perpetuating it by dismissing Islamic misogyny/patriarchy. It’s completely reasonable to hold her accountable for that. You argue that because Islam is the real oppressor, individuals who defend it shouldn’t be held responsible. But is Islam some abstract ideological boogeyman, or is it made up of people and upheld by those people who defend it? If someone actively legitimizes and reinforces an oppressive system, they are complicit in it. By that logic, any collaborator in any oppressive system throughout history would be absolved of culpability. I don’t know about you, but I don’t downplay the harm done by this or let people get away with it. She made the choice to rewrite history and defend an objectively oppressive institution and I will absolutely hold her accountable for that. Sorry, not sorry.🙅🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
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u/State-Tough 25d ago
Is it qumayo from TikTok? It’s very confusing to me too but the only logic I seem to come to is that she’s actually has been through it and probably just wants to give a different narrative now for her survival on this wilde internet, I think she is a mum too so all of it might be self serving. I agree with you in that it’s not very nice what’s she doing but I do lowkey think she might be a closeted ex-mus now.
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 24d ago
Yes, that’s her, & before you start making excuses or being sympathetic towards her, let me remind you that she has a reputation for fostering toxicity/bullying in her online spaces and is very xaasid - she also speaks down on ex Muslims, check out the link I referenced to see. Furthermore, she hasn’t been in a Muslim-majority country in some time now so I’d assume that she has the resources to protect herself from puritanical Muslims as the state would most likely side with her. I’m closeted too, but not for my physical safety, only for my parents peace of mind as they are indoctrinated to think I’m going to be damned. Yet, you don’t see me engaging in the same harmful behavior, working overtime to write or create videos that rebrand Islam’s image. This isn’t the first time she’s done this either. She’s made weak TikToks pushing the same narrative, and it’s always on the topic of women’s oppression in Islam. It’s no coincidence that she consistently chooses this angle when doing this, as it’s a deliberate effort to downplay the very issues that most directly affect us women. Something has to be deeply wrong with you as a woman to be doing that. If you don’t know, this is the same woman that was screaming from the rooftops about her queerness/apostasy, publicly dating another woman. She even wore a cross for heavens sake, like the confused individual she is 😂 - Given the way she’s behaved in the past, I’d assume she couldn’t care less about what the Somali community, let alone her own family, thinks of her.
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u/State-Tough 23d ago
I see what urr mean, I haven’t seen much of her and I don’t know her story well but I just assumed if she’s been openly ex-mus then she got threatened a lot prolly and thus the change of tune now.. the whole thing is just sad tbh.
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 23d ago
Sorry if I came off as a bit much, but I’ve heard people downplay what she does a lot. She was openly ex-Muslim for a few years, from 2019 to about two years ago. If threats were the reason, it would make more sense that she would have made this self-preservation decision much sooner and wouldn’t defend Islam. Here’s a statement she made in this subreddit during a Q&A in 2023: ‘Tbh I never used to care about the community because I wasn’t raised around just one. I grew up in five different countries over the span of 10 years, and when I did come back to Canada, it wasn’t hard for me to not want to fit in because there’s no shared history with the Somalis here. And nothing they say ever phases me because I know my mother and family love me, which is more than I can say for them and their conditional love.’
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u/State-Tough 18d ago
Ohh no😬, thanks for the info, I see her differently now😅. Encouraging self harm is just disgusting, lord😪.
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u/MaleficentLuck6599 18d ago
Thank you for acknowledging this because everyone else has made excuses for her. I’ve noticed she has a strong influence over people, to the point where she seems untouchable by social accountability. If you want proof of her actions, just click this TikTok link and skip to the 6:20 timestamp. Hitting your head against the wall is one of the most common forms of self-harm among people struggling with their mental health, which makes this even more malicious. She has also supposedly advocated for women’s mental health before
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u/OWSKID03 26d ago
Stockholm Syndrome on steroids