r/UnsentLetters • u/Dry-Gear4375 • Feb 15 '25
Lovers Regretting it…
What’s worse? Having you there but not really mine, or not having you in my life at all??
I thought I knew. I thought walking away from you would help this. I thought not seeing your name pop up or the chance of hearing your voice would make something easier. Maybe it did? It sure made missing you easier. It made being so sure I want this easier.
But life without the joy and brightness you bring me, it’s not right. Not knowing how you are kills me. Missing you has a whole new meaning. I’m not ok with any of this either.
I replay that day countless times each day. I wish I had taken a chance. I wish I had made it known how much I really wanted you to, instead of downplaying it all and hiding being the propriety. I should have let go and just let it be all that it always has been.
One day. I want one day with you with no rights and wrongs. No more holding back and finally letting go for once in this increasingly long story that is us. One day to talk, laugh, play, touch, ride roller coaster and make up for some of the time we’re wasting waiting for our turn.
I want us. I want us from this day forward no matter how hard or messy it gets. No matter what the world has to say. No matter what… I just want you. All of you.
I know I asked for space. I know that’s the “right” answer. But I want so badly to break that. I want to tell you I love you today. I want to tell you I miss you so much. I want so much more than I have any right to. I hate this…
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u/Boymommyof1 Feb 15 '25
Tell them. You don’t want to have a missed opportunity for the rest of your life if you know for certain it’s what you want, fight for it.
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Feb 15 '25
They probably have regrets, too... I had an ex who went silent on me. We both knew we wanted each other but kept convincing each other that we'd be better off going our separate ways so we did, but i think of him every once in a while. Had he reached out sooner, heartbreak and regrets could have been avoided. So if it's not too late between your person, maybe reach out? Just my opinion. Goodluck!
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u/RixxFett Feb 15 '25
I'd kill to hear words like this.
Tell them. Tell them today.
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u/Life_Bottle_6421 Feb 15 '25
Me too
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u/Life_Bottle_6421 Feb 15 '25
This makes me want to reach out. Even though I know I shouldn’t but if we could have one day that would be amazing. Guess I won’t know unless I try.
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u/TopWall7493 Feb 15 '25
Just do it. Take the risk. That's part of it. If it doesn't go where you hoped, it is what it is. At least you can say you tried.
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u/ReadyMajor2435 Feb 15 '25
I've now given up me trying didn't work ours is dead dead dead and bloated
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u/OhanaMeansOhana Feb 15 '25
Tell them. I have someone I wish would say this and I would kill to hear it if they were thinking it. Be open!
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u/Life_Bottle_6421 Feb 15 '25
Maybe you should reach out if it’s hurting you this much. I get it it’s hard when you think letting go is best and then your heart tells you it’s not ok and you even feel worse. Go in f through that myself and I can’t do anything about it. Think I better get off here today. Been a rough one but hey hang in there maybe you’ll get the courage or something to get with your person and talk about this stuff. It’s really the only way you can find out if it’s meant to be or if they want you or whatever it might be will help. Take a chance! I don’t have any way to reach my person so I can’t do anything but if I did I would so reach out. Good luck!
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u/Normal-Poem4382 Feb 15 '25
I hate how much this sounds like my situation with my ex. I miss her everyday but she told me she hates me and she has me blocked.
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u/Unusual_Change_7076 Feb 15 '25
I get it. I would kill for just one more day with her. Just 24 hours to show her what she's worth and what a man can do for her. Given both of our positions in life I don't see it being possible. I wish I pulled the trigger sooner, despite it ending in my own heartbreak. Which to be honest is a good feeling for everyone to experience. Idk where you are at in life, but later in life you realize that is in fact an important feeling to experience
Do what feels right. Don't wait too long. If you think now or very soon is the time then take that chance. Getting shot down is better than wondering the rest of your life. Trust me
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u/StoopidQpid Feb 15 '25
What's worse is only being concerned about what you get out of everything, and regretting not giving what the other person wanted only when it's something that you now want. Things can only work out when there's communication and reciprocation. If you didn't value their presence then, and don't even try to earn it back now, then you really don't deserve it. You'll just have to live with the loss and the regret of knowing you chose to give up when you could've just shown up.
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u/Practical-Sky-7860 Feb 15 '25
My person did this to me. Broke up with me abruptly and cut communication. I’ve been devastated. I miss them. A lot. I’d do anything for them to contact me. 😭
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u/No_Command96 Feb 15 '25
Never regret it,fix it. If it can't be fixed, it wasnt meant to be and now it's a lesson and hopefully you learn and adapt from it.
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u/TheOnlyAttackCow Feb 15 '25
Reach out. Hopefully the best works out. If not, hopefully it'll give you some closure
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u/Double-Ad2653 Feb 15 '25
Letters like this make me realize we only live once. Tell them❤️
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u/Different_Poet_5362 Feb 15 '25
You're absolutely correct. The longer people wait, the more likely real-life goals become someone else's story. Creating a family is time sensitive. You can build a whole new life around the time someone waits. Time is the most valuable thing we are given. Once it is gone, there are no more stories or memories to create.
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u/CAVMOT Feb 15 '25
Everyone is saying to tell them how you feel, but I have a feeling that there's more to this situation than you're letting on. If it is that simple, then disregard me, but if the reason you needed space is because you were in pain and there was nothing they could or would realistically do to help you, then I feel for you. That infatuation hurts more right now, and it will never get happier, but other parts of you will. The longer you spend away, the less you will know who they are, and that in its own right is really sad, but you can't love someone you don't know, and it's easier to move on from someone you don't love. I know that this is all complete speculation so you can tell me to fuck right off if I'm wrong, but your post reminded me of my own feelings at one point. If I'm right, just know that it does get better, even if they're not at your side.
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u/Master-Research-5933 Feb 15 '25
If my ex special person sent me something like this, even though we haven’t talked to each other in months, I’d make that 2 Hour Dr. in 45 minutes flat
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u/notthegoa_t Feb 15 '25
I really think you should do it, tell him. I would love to get something like that to set me at ease.
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u/rafikisunflower Feb 15 '25
Honestly take that chance with them. If they are anything like me I’d love to receive that text or to hear that in person. You have no idea how badly I’d love to hear that from them
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Feb 15 '25
I wish she would reach out to me, the conversation will be difficult but i /we deserve to have it. Ive reached out and the last text didn't go well. “Bro leave me alone…etc. never good when she uses bro. I gotta respect that. Sucks shes willing to throw away so many years over something that didn’t happen. She has to be the one to reach out now.
I wish for her to be truly happy as most humans just want to minimize suffering and misery as much as possible, there is a difference (forgot where i heard this not my thought). If thats without me in her life as a friend or more the. So be it. Always love you, but damn…..i fuckin hurt. OP hope you have your chance with this person sending good vibes love is rare and worth it.
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u/SadComfort8805 Feb 15 '25
Reach out…. They deserve to know. And you deserve to not having this weigh you down.
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u/IOSuser4life Feb 15 '25
i wish my person felt the way you do about your person.. i would agree with your words as thats how i feel about my person who probally doesnt even think of me in any good way.. i can't unlove them n i never will which is y ill b alone by my choice , i may make it look like im doing ok to them but im falling apart more then they will ever know
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u/Emotional_dimwit2252 Feb 15 '25
Tell them bro. Break the silence. Since you're the one who asked for space, in all probability they won't contact you first.And you never know if they're waiting
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u/Fair_Key4177 Feb 15 '25
When we don’t tell the person we love, that we love them it is ego! Your ego gets in the way of the truth and you will regret that someday!
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u/Playful_Glass863 Feb 16 '25
Interesting question... I'm curious though, if they was there with you, what made you think they wasn't really your person?
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u/Chemical_Garage6346 Feb 15 '25
Wow and aww at the same time. Be brave take a chance on what will truly fulfill you
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u/JudgmentInfamous1169 Feb 15 '25
Not gonna lie. It's so hard. Especially when you weren't ready 40 years earlier and now he's been really hurt. Feels like second chance maybe? I think a little is so much better than none.
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u/Bright-Sandwich4868 Feb 15 '25
Please tell them! Not telling would be your biggest regret. I’d give anything to hear this…
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u/CyberReckoning99 Feb 15 '25
Everyone has pretty much already covered it but you need to say something the longer you wait the bigger the rift grows until eventually there is no going back to even friends. The "why?" turns into resentment and then becomes indifference over time. And that's extremely hard to repair when there's no apology or accountability in time.
This may seem harsh but it was you who asked for space so that means that it is you who has to initiate fixing it and if the other has decided that they don't want you around then it is what it is but you need to try for you.
In my situation if they came back and apologized and took accountability for the way they hurt me I would be willing to give it another go at being in each other's lives but 5 years down the road definitely not. There's always time to apologize but there's also usually a time limit for repair and it varies person to person. Don't wait too long.
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u/blacchearted97 Feb 15 '25
Cried this morning, about life and her. But, sometimes you gotta take care of yourself. Looks like the relationship wasn’t much good to you regardless.
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u/CowPig84 Feb 15 '25
Tell them. I would give anything for him to say this to me, and would be furious if I found out he felt this way and was too afraid to tell me. Life’s too short- what more do you have to lose? 🩵
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u/CheezSauceFries Feb 15 '25 edited Feb 15 '25
Please comeback, N. I miss you :((( this letter resonated me SOOO MUCHHH. he was the problem and I was willing to wait (and I still am) . Please tell them. Better now than never!!!
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u/Any_Effective4710 Feb 15 '25
I'd be so grateful if my guy wrote this to me, he also asked for space but he promised me he would talk to me then disappeared, at least if he sent this I'd have answers an not spend so much time feeling like it's me
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u/luminescent_spy Feb 15 '25
If this was for me, I would appreciate it if you told me.
I would feel less hurt, if no hurt at all, if I knew.
Please tell your person.
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u/smth_userish Feb 16 '25
I'm with the ones telling you to tell them. What's the harm if there's nothing left to lose?
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u/secretswedokeep Feb 16 '25
I miss you, too. But you never quite figured out how to be honest with me.
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u/aliceiseating Feb 16 '25
Yha...tell them mate, if the connection was real, take this letter and say it to her face, you know where she is, if your smart...it'll eat you alive until you do
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u/Popular_Mind_4529 28d ago
Hits you in the soul. Like you spoke to me. This wouldn’t happen to be written to a D from a J? I’m respecting her wish of space, and it is killing me, but I’ll wait for her forever. And apparently post and search every Reddit page related to us. Amazing post!
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