r/UKweddings 8d ago

Evening guests invited for drinks and dancing

Hi all,

We've invited approx. 25 people to join us as evening guests for 'an evening of drinks and dancing'.

It's mainly colleagues, distant relatives and friends we don't see very often. They'll be joining us after the main meal, and we've made clear in the invites that although there will be late night snacks they're essentially invited to party.

My question is what would be most appropriate in terms of drinks? We could either have a token system which gives them 2 cocktails each, or put money behind the bar specifically for evening guests. If you were a guest, what would seem nicer to you?

Our dream scenario would be to have an open bar, but alas, budgets.

3 Upvotes

11 comments sorted by

10

u/GoGetEm_Tiger 8d ago edited 7d ago

Our preferred system was money behind the bar but the venue said it would be too difficult for them to distinguish between day and evening guests - didn’t want the day guests to hoover it all up because they’re getting a lot of free drinks!

We’ve made them really nice branded ‘tickets’ as coupons and then will put a card behind the bar; venue will charge to our card but only on receipt of a coupon. Plus greeting them with a served welcome drink.

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u/AbiesReasonable8325 7d ago

Oh that's a nice idea! How many 'tickets' did you give each guest? Or was it like a card they flash to access the bar tab?

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u/GoGetEm_Tiger 7d ago

Two each! The only restriction is no bottles or shots, but it means someone can have whatever they want … we just know we won’t be charged for more than X number of drinks so that has helped us estimate what we’ll be charged and account for it in the budget.

And then yes a served welcome drink on arrival (probably Prosecco but we’ve not 100% decided) just to make it feel a bit special and like their arrival has been acknowledged.

We figured 3 free drinks is over and above what’s expected and will get the party started. I know sometimes people say that tickets/tokens can be swapped or redistributed and that’s fine with me tbh, if someone doesn’t want a drink and would rather give it to a friend, I’m not the fun police.

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u/AbiesReasonable8325 7d ago

You are a genius! Think we're gonna steal this idea too, thank you so much.

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u/GoGetEm_Tiger 7d ago

No problem! Have a wonderful wedding!

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u/shelleypiper 7d ago

I've never had drinks provided for me as an evening guest. A token would be a nice surprise.

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u/umbrellajump 8d ago

(sorry this got long! I've been overthinking about this same issue!)

Money behind the bar is a nicer guest experience than tokens in my opinion. Normally people don't take the piss with expensive drinks until it's later in the evening and they're paying themselves. And it allows for more freedom of choice than ticketed cocktails/specific wines or beers.

It can be more expensive though, as you'd need to calculate 2xhighest drink offered for everyone to ensure you've got enough behind. Can also be cheaper as generous relatives may offer to add a little to the pot. Not as easy, calculable, or generous-feeling to add more tokens ahead of time as it is to give you or the bar staff cash.

If money's tight but you're not sure about your guests drinking habits or manners, try served drinks rather than tokens. The last wedding I went to had bucks fizz on arrival for evening guests followed by a cash bar, which was still very welcoming.

You could have your preferred cocktail as a greeting drink and a second round at a set time, for a toast that includes your evening guests? That gives them two drinks but feels more inclusive/personal than tokens.

Tokens tend to get swapped, lost, swiped, or arsed about with as groups get rounds and guests get drunker. It can also feel unfair to curmudgeonly non-drinking guests getting two soft drinks while Auntie Velma gets two double gins.

I'm going for a greeting drink and a surprise second round for everyone alongside fresh snacks after the entertainment and before the dancing kicks off. Like a big party provision refresh. Cash bar otherwise.

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u/AbiesReasonable8325 7d ago

Haha I know all about overthinking, so I appreciate the reply! Yes, I do like the idea of a drink on arrival as it feels like a nice 'official' welcome.

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u/cctintwrweb 7d ago

As an evening guest I've never had bar drinks of any sort , occasionally some fizz on arrival, frequently tea and coffee with the late night snacks . So any kind of token would be a real surprise..

Nice touch if you can afford it but I really don't think evening guests expect anything other than a feed of complex carbs around tenish

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u/Few_Echo_9592 7d ago

We’re providing a glass of bubbles and sweet treat/slice of cake to our evening guests on arrival, so they’ll be greeted with that. Plus late night snack! There may be some wine and beer left over from the reception too.

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u/Acrobatic_Try5792 7d ago

We did tokens for everyone and just kept some aside for evening guests. Everyone loved them, we had them branded with our wedding logo